Ashes to Ashes Quotes
Alex Drake: I was supposed to go HOME!
Gene Hunt: Your presence is required here a little bit longer... by me.
Gene Hunt: Your presence is required here a little bit longer... by me.
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Alex Drake: Will you just shut up and listen to me! This is my bloody fantasy, and I will be listened to!
Gene Hunt: Excuse my colleague. Education of a toff, manners of a sewer rat.
Gene Hunt: Excuse my colleague. Education of a toff, manners of a sewer rat.
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Gene Hunt: [to Alex Drake] Take that seatbelt off! You're a police officer, not a bloody vicar.
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Gene Hunt: Personally I have no desire whatsoever to see your bony, privately-educated bottom, but it's good for morale.
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Alex Drake: A real, living, breathing Thatcherite businessman. How completely brilliant.
Gene Hunt: Personal friend of the Great Handbag herself, so try and behave.
Alex: I promise not to twang his red braces.
[the elevator doors open, revealing Danny Moore; Alex's eyes widen.]
Alex: ... more than once.
Gene Hunt: Personal friend of the Great Handbag herself, so try and behave.
Alex: I promise not to twang his red braces.
[the elevator doors open, revealing Danny Moore; Alex's eyes widen.]
Alex: ... more than once.
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Gene Hunt: We found a small amount of explosives on land near the Royal Docks.
Alex Drake: Well, technically a small dog found it. He's an even smaller dog now.
Alex Drake: Well, technically a small dog found it. He's an even smaller dog now.
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Alex Drake: Be honest, Viv. How do I look?
Viv James: Uh, fine.
Alex Drake: Thank you. Word of advice? Don't bother with poker.
Viv James: Uh, fine.
Alex Drake: Thank you. Word of advice? Don't bother with poker.
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Gene Hunt: An agency girl that accuses a client of rape, that's going to go down about as well as a pork pie at a Jewish wedding.
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Alex Drake: When they say it's difficult for rape victims to be believed, I wonder why?
Gene Hunt: She gets paid for having sex.
Alex Drake: It's not about sex, is it? It's about control, and power, and revenge.
Gene Hunt: Maybe tell me about it some other time, like when I'm in a coma, or when I'm dead.
Alex Drake: To the interview room? Where's the rape suite?
Gene Hunt: Rape suite? Is that with or without a minibar?
Gene Hunt: She gets paid for having sex.
Alex Drake: It's not about sex, is it? It's about control, and power, and revenge.
Gene Hunt: Maybe tell me about it some other time, like when I'm in a coma, or when I'm dead.
Alex Drake: To the interview room? Where's the rape suite?
Gene Hunt: Rape suite? Is that with or without a minibar?
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Alex Drake: This requires a cognitive interview procedure.
Gene Hunt: We're fresh out of cognitives. What say we just talk to her?
Alex Drake: I don't think she'll open up with a man present.
Gene Hunt: Plenty of women have opened up to me without so much as a shandy down their necks.
Gene Hunt: We're fresh out of cognitives. What say we just talk to her?
Alex Drake: I don't think she'll open up with a man present.
Gene Hunt: Plenty of women have opened up to me without so much as a shandy down their necks.
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
[After Alex enters Gene's office, having spent the night drinking and having sex, following a failed attempt at seduction on Gene]
Gene Hunt: I am trying to help you here!
Alex Drake: Well I don't need your help! Their archaic attitude is their problem, not mine!
Gene Hunt: Wrong. It's my problem. To keep this department running smoothly, I need their respect, which I've got. They look up to me, they should be looking up to you and all!
Alex Drake: What do you want me to do, morph into a nun!? IT'S NOT LIKE I'VE SHAGGED AN ENTIRE RUGBY TEAM, IS IT!?
Ray Carling: [outside] I'll bet she has. [the rest of CID laugh]
Alex Drake: It's your fault, anyway!
Gene Hunt: How is it my fault!?
Alex Drake: Because you left me on my own, and I ended up with some Thatcherite wanker!
Gene Hunt: I told you to go to bed, alone! If you'd listened to me in the first place, we wouldn't be wasting my time, having this ridiculous conversation!
Gene Hunt: I am trying to help you here!
Alex Drake: Well I don't need your help! Their archaic attitude is their problem, not mine!
Gene Hunt: Wrong. It's my problem. To keep this department running smoothly, I need their respect, which I've got. They look up to me, they should be looking up to you and all!
Alex Drake: What do you want me to do, morph into a nun!? IT'S NOT LIKE I'VE SHAGGED AN ENTIRE RUGBY TEAM, IS IT!?
Ray Carling: [outside] I'll bet she has. [the rest of CID laugh]
Alex Drake: It's your fault, anyway!
Gene Hunt: How is it my fault!?
Alex Drake: Because you left me on my own, and I ended up with some Thatcherite wanker!
Gene Hunt: I told you to go to bed, alone! If you'd listened to me in the first place, we wouldn't be wasting my time, having this ridiculous conversation!
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
[After Gene questions Alex's insistence on warning prostitutes of a killer on the loose]
Alex Drake: The skeleton in the closet. Private education, years at Oxbridge, all counted for nothing really, because I, Alex Drake, was once a prostitute.
Chris Skelton: Bloody hell!
Ray Carling: [chuckles] I knew it!
Alex Drake: There, I've said it.
Gene Hunt: [chortles] Christ on a bike!
Alex Drake: That wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.
Gene Hunt: You're telling me you lied to get onto the force?
Alex Drake: No, actually. What I just told you was a lie. I did it to show you how your preconceptions can inform your judgements about other people, especially prostitutes. Sorry.
Gene Hunt: You know, sometime I hate you, Drake.
Alex Drake: [chuckles] So I'm not what you'd expect a prostitute to be? If I said I'd been raped, you'd believe me but not someone like Trixie, not a woman like that?
Gene Hunt: No, not hate, despise.
Alex Drake: Alright, so I'm not a hooker. But if I was, do you know something, Gene? You could never, ever afford me!
Gene Hunt: You know, you might talk with a plum in your gob, love, but I would rather go with one of them [gestures to a number of prostitutes in the background] than waste my money on some bitter, twisted, messed-up, clenched-arsed, toffee-nosed bitch like you! [Alex slaps him] You feel better now?
Alex Drake: No. [she punches Gene in the mouth] Better now. [to an astounded Chris and Ray] Come on, ladies, what are you waiting for!? Let's get pissed!
Alex Drake: The skeleton in the closet. Private education, years at Oxbridge, all counted for nothing really, because I, Alex Drake, was once a prostitute.
Chris Skelton: Bloody hell!
Ray Carling: [chuckles] I knew it!
Alex Drake: There, I've said it.
Gene Hunt: [chortles] Christ on a bike!
Alex Drake: That wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.
Gene Hunt: You're telling me you lied to get onto the force?
Alex Drake: No, actually. What I just told you was a lie. I did it to show you how your preconceptions can inform your judgements about other people, especially prostitutes. Sorry.
Gene Hunt: You know, sometime I hate you, Drake.
Alex Drake: [chuckles] So I'm not what you'd expect a prostitute to be? If I said I'd been raped, you'd believe me but not someone like Trixie, not a woman like that?
Gene Hunt: No, not hate, despise.
Alex Drake: Alright, so I'm not a hooker. But if I was, do you know something, Gene? You could never, ever afford me!
Gene Hunt: You know, you might talk with a plum in your gob, love, but I would rather go with one of them [gestures to a number of prostitutes in the background] than waste my money on some bitter, twisted, messed-up, clenched-arsed, toffee-nosed bitch like you! [Alex slaps him] You feel better now?
Alex Drake: No. [she punches Gene in the mouth] Better now. [to an astounded Chris and Ray] Come on, ladies, what are you waiting for!? Let's get pissed!
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Gene Hunt: Right! How many birds does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two! One to run around screaming "What do I do?" and one to shag the electrician!
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Alex Drake: Artemis. Goddess of the hunt. Good work, Viv.
Ray Carling: That you, is it? Goddess of the Hunt?
Chris Skelton: Sounds like a potent symbol of female power.
Ray Carling: That you, is it? Goddess of the Hunt?
Chris Skelton: Sounds like a potent symbol of female power.
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Gene Hunt: Contrary to what Commie nutters like the RWF believe, and what you seem to have forgotten, this is the land of bloody democracy! Land of Hope and Glory! Rule Britannia! Roast Beef and Yorkshire Pud!
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Gene Hunt: Oh dear Lord, if this is a test, I fear I may fail. And I thought it would be the booze or the fags but oh no! I'm gonna die in an underground vault, in the company of a posh, mouthy tart with a head full of brains and the common sense of a grain weevil.
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Gene Hunt: I am trying to find out who murdered this man. If that makes me a fascist, then "Heil bloody Hilter!"
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
[Alex, Gene, Chris and Ray have walked in on a gay couple having sex. Chris opens up a briefcase that turns out to be full of sex toys. He holds up a dildo and inspects it.]
Chris Skelton: He must have bloody big ears.
Alex Drake: Wrong orifice, Chris. It's a butt plug.
['Chris looks at it, still puzzled.]
Gene Hunt: It goes up your arse, Chris!
Chris Skelton: He must have bloody big ears.
Alex Drake: Wrong orifice, Chris. It's a butt plug.
['Chris looks at it, still puzzled.]
Gene Hunt: It goes up your arse, Chris!
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Gene Hunt: You know some people get Pick Of The Pops, I get Pick Of The Twats [Looks at Chris]
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Gene Hunt: Oh ye of little faith.
Chris Skelton: All hail the mighty Quattro.
Chris Skelton: All hail the mighty Quattro.
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
[Gene has just rescued an unconscious Alex.]
Gene Hunt: [Opening her shirt] I've bloody dreamt about doing this.
[Gene begins to give chest compressions to Alex]
Gene Hunt: Don't you dare!
[Gene checks to see if she is breathing. Realizing she is not, he goes to give her mouth to mouth. Right before he can do it, she wakes up]
Alex Drake: [Putting her hand on Gene's face, obviously dazed] I figured it out. I made the connections, and, I solved it. And you saved me. And if you saved me, maybe I can save them.
Gene Hunt: [Putting his hand on Alex's head] Yeah, I think it's called concussion.
Gene Hunt: [Opening her shirt] I've bloody dreamt about doing this.
[Gene begins to give chest compressions to Alex]
Gene Hunt: Don't you dare!
[Gene checks to see if she is breathing. Realizing she is not, he goes to give her mouth to mouth. Right before he can do it, she wakes up]
Alex Drake: [Putting her hand on Gene's face, obviously dazed] I figured it out. I made the connections, and, I solved it. And you saved me. And if you saved me, maybe I can save them.
Gene Hunt: [Putting his hand on Alex's head] Yeah, I think it's called concussion.
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Alex Drake: The mind's an amazing organ...
Gene Hunt: I've got an amazing organ.
Alex Drake: ... capable of much more than you could imagine.
Gene Hunt: Right again.
Gene Hunt: I've got an amazing organ.
Alex Drake: ... capable of much more than you could imagine.
Gene Hunt: Right again.
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
[Gill Hollis is shooting at the CID]
Gene Hunt: [running] Get in, quick!
Chris Skelton: Get back, we're under attack!
Luigi: What do you mean, attack!?
[The CID run through the door. Gene falls on top of Alex]
Luigi: Shoot at my place! Bloody bastids!
[Suddenly, the shooting stops]
Alex Drake: It's stopped.
Gene Hunt: Shh, shh, shh... Chris! Give us a gun!
Chris Skelton: Oh shit, I must have left it in the car...
Gill Hollis: Hunt! Hunt, come out and face me!
Gene Hunt: Well what a surprise. It's that lovely lad who does the charity work.
Alex Drake: Well get off me then!
[Gene gets off of Alex. They sit up and realize one of the bullet holes lines up perfectly with her head]
Gene Hunt: [running] Get in, quick!
Chris Skelton: Get back, we're under attack!
Luigi: What do you mean, attack!?
[The CID run through the door. Gene falls on top of Alex]
Luigi: Shoot at my place! Bloody bastids!
[Suddenly, the shooting stops]
Alex Drake: It's stopped.
Gene Hunt: Shh, shh, shh... Chris! Give us a gun!
Chris Skelton: Oh shit, I must have left it in the car...
Gill Hollis: Hunt! Hunt, come out and face me!
Gene Hunt: Well what a surprise. It's that lovely lad who does the charity work.
Alex Drake: Well get off me then!
[Gene gets off of Alex. They sit up and realize one of the bullet holes lines up perfectly with her head]
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Alex Drake: I propose, that given your reaction to the gender balance of the gang, that this is their first job.
Gene Hunt: What, New Kids On The Block?
Alex Drake: Now that's a good name for a boy band!
Sharon 'Shaz' Granger: Gov.
Gene Hunt: Chris, Take That! It's the dodgy second hand car dealers. East 17!
Chris Skelton: Alright, Backstreet Boys.
Ray Carling: Yeah, let’s get 'em Busted!
Alex Drake: Ooh God! I'm gonna scream!
Gene Hunt: What, New Kids On The Block?
Alex Drake: Now that's a good name for a boy band!
Sharon 'Shaz' Granger: Gov.
Gene Hunt: Chris, Take That! It's the dodgy second hand car dealers. East 17!
Chris Skelton: Alright, Backstreet Boys.
Ray Carling: Yeah, let’s get 'em Busted!
Alex Drake: Ooh God! I'm gonna scream!
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Gene Hunt: All right, I'm putting a end to this.
Alex Drake: No, no, you can't go!
[Alex grabs Gene's hand]
Alex Drake: Somebody is going to die!
Gene Hunt: I am not going to die in a trattoria!
Alex Drake: No, no, you can't go!
[Alex grabs Gene's hand]
Alex Drake: Somebody is going to die!
Gene Hunt: I am not going to die in a trattoria!
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Gene Hunt: [to Alex] You want a hunk of the Gene Genie in case the nasty man scares you?
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes
Gene Hunt: I want this place cleaner than a virgin's pudendum!
Chris Skelton: What's a pudendum, Guv?
Gene Hunt: You are, Chris! You are!
Chris Skelton: What's a pudendum, Guv?
Gene Hunt: You are, Chris! You are!
TV Show: Ashes to Ashes