Count Duckula Quotes
Count Duckula: Blood! I need blood! I must have blood; my fangs tingle to be biting necks!
TV Show: Count Duckula
Count Duckula: [after a long and winding mix-up of names] I can't stand anymore!
Yoobee: Of course you can't stand anymore, we've tied you to the sacrificial altar, and it serves you right!
Yoobee: Of course you can't stand anymore, we've tied you to the sacrificial altar, and it serves you right!
TV Show: Count Duckula
Count Duckula: I suppose we're lucky to have found this ship so quickly.
Igor: Mm, quite so, sir, but I-, I must say I don't like the look of the crew.
Count Duckula: I don't like the smell of them either; I bet they've never heard of soap.
Captain Penguin: 'Course I've heard of soap, I eats a bar a week whether I needs it or not, ha-harr!
Igor: Mm, quite so, sir, but I-, I must say I don't like the look of the crew.
Count Duckula: I don't like the smell of them either; I bet they've never heard of soap.
Captain Penguin: 'Course I've heard of soap, I eats a bar a week whether I needs it or not, ha-harr!
TV Show: Count Duckula
Count Duckula: The mystic saxophone?
Igor: What the Archduck was searching for!
Count Duckula: Well, you never mentioned *that*!
Igor: I thought I did, milord.
Count Duckula: No, you did not!
Ruffles: [the Crow Brothers are eavesdropping outside the window. the first crow Brother asks the second] Here now, did he mention the mystic saxophone?
Burt: [asks the third] I don't know, did he mention the mystic saxophone?
Junior: [asks the fourth] I don't know! Eh, did he mention the mystic saxophone?
4th Crow: Uh, no.
Junior: [to second] No.
Burt: [to first] No.
Ruffles: [to Igor, who does not realize that he is there] No, you never mentioned it!
Count Duckula: You see? You never mentioned it!
Igor: I'm sorry, milord. Milord, it's rather stuffy in here. Excuse me while I open a window. [he opens the window, which knocks the Crow Brothers down]
Igor: What the Archduck was searching for!
Count Duckula: Well, you never mentioned *that*!
Igor: I thought I did, milord.
Count Duckula: No, you did not!
Ruffles: [the Crow Brothers are eavesdropping outside the window. the first crow Brother asks the second] Here now, did he mention the mystic saxophone?
Burt: [asks the third] I don't know, did he mention the mystic saxophone?
Junior: [asks the fourth] I don't know! Eh, did he mention the mystic saxophone?
4th Crow: Uh, no.
Junior: [to second] No.
Burt: [to first] No.
Ruffles: [to Igor, who does not realize that he is there] No, you never mentioned it!
Count Duckula: You see? You never mentioned it!
Igor: I'm sorry, milord. Milord, it's rather stuffy in here. Excuse me while I open a window. [he opens the window, which knocks the Crow Brothers down]
TV Show: Count Duckula
Lavinia Lavender: Hello, I'm Lavinia Lavender. But of course, you've seen me on the screen. Shame about the old boy. Where's the will being read?
Crouch: [responding to all of her statements] Indeed, madam, No, I'm afraid I haven't, madam. Indeed it is, madam. In the library, madam.
Crouch: [responding to all of her statements] Indeed, madam, No, I'm afraid I haven't, madam. Indeed it is, madam. In the library, madam.
TV Show: Count Duckula
Nanny: Are you saying my cocoa's lumpy?
Count Duckula: Of course not! It's one big lump.
Igor: Rather like Nanny herself, milord.
Count Duckula: Hehe! Very good Igor! I don't care what everyone else says - you HAVE got a sense of humour. Somewhere.
Count Duckula: Of course not! It's one big lump.
Igor: Rather like Nanny herself, milord.
Count Duckula: Hehe! Very good Igor! I don't care what everyone else says - you HAVE got a sense of humour. Somewhere.
TV Show: Count Duckula
Von Goosewing: I ask you to do one thing,Heinreich,one small thing and what do you do?
Heinreich: I don't know! What do I do?
Von Goosewing: You don't do it,that's what!
Heinreich: I don't know! What do I do?
Von Goosewing: You don't do it,that's what!
TV Show: Count Duckula
Von Goosewing: You have ruined everything!
Heinreich: It isn't my fault!
Von Goosewing: It is your fault! It's all your fault!
Heinreich: It isn't my fault!
Von Goosewing: It is your fault! It's all your fault!
TV Show: Count Duckula
Juan Jose etc...': Seize them! Bind them, jab them, prod them, and be generally unpleasant to them! And one last thing!'
Duckula/Igor/Nanny': Yes?
Juan Jose etc...': (sweetly) Do you really like-a my boots?
Duckula/Igor/Nanny': Yes?
Juan Jose etc...': (sweetly) Do you really like-a my boots?
TV Show: Count Duckula
"Don Diego'": Just because I'm tall and handsome and brave and good and kind and...I-I-I-happen to chop up one or two of the villagers into tiny little pieces now and again...they like me! Ha ha, ha ha
Don Diego': Tonight is fiesta for all vampires from all over Spain! There'll be music, and a finger buffet with the real fingers. (evilly) Then - then - we chop up a whole village, then there is bingo to follow!
Duckula': Stop this! Stop this! Stop it, Don Diego! No! I cannot let you do this!
Don Diego': Oh, you don't like bingo? Ok, we play something else. You choose.
Duckula': Well, I wouldn't mind playing... - no listen! I mean, you cannot chop up a whole village! It's not right! I will do anything to stop you.
Don Diego': Anything?
Duckula': Anything.
Don Diego': Ahahaha!!! Then tonight, you will fight the horrible bull in all of Spain - El Loco!
Duckula': OK, listen - if I fight El Loco, will you let the villagers go?
Don Diego': I will...I will let bits of them go.
Duckula': Let ALL of them go, or no fight!
Don Diego': I can't even keep the noses?
Duckula': No, no noses!
Don Diego': OK. But remember - El Loco is the most nastiest thing on four legs. He'll ripped up your body, and there'll be bits of you you didn't even know you had. Aha!! Ahahaha!
Duckula': Ha! I'm not afraid of you, Don Diego! OR El Loco! 'Til tonight then!
Don Diego': Tonight is fiesta for all vampires from all over Spain! There'll be music, and a finger buffet with the real fingers. (evilly) Then - then - we chop up a whole village, then there is bingo to follow!
Duckula': Stop this! Stop this! Stop it, Don Diego! No! I cannot let you do this!
Don Diego': Oh, you don't like bingo? Ok, we play something else. You choose.
Duckula': Well, I wouldn't mind playing... - no listen! I mean, you cannot chop up a whole village! It's not right! I will do anything to stop you.
Don Diego': Anything?
Duckula': Anything.
Don Diego': Ahahaha!!! Then tonight, you will fight the horrible bull in all of Spain - El Loco!
Duckula': OK, listen - if I fight El Loco, will you let the villagers go?
Don Diego': I will...I will let bits of them go.
Duckula': Let ALL of them go, or no fight!
Don Diego': I can't even keep the noses?
Duckula': No, no noses!
Don Diego': OK. But remember - El Loco is the most nastiest thing on four legs. He'll ripped up your body, and there'll be bits of you you didn't even know you had. Aha!! Ahahaha!
Duckula': Ha! I'm not afraid of you, Don Diego! OR El Loco! 'Til tonight then!
TV Show: Count Duckula
Nanny': Ooh, can we keep him? It'll be a nice bit of company for Towser.
Duckula': Towser??
Nanny': Our werewolf!
Duckula': Igor ... do we have a werewolf?
Igor': Oh no, sir.
Duckula': Then why would we want to waste time chasing after werewolves to keep a werewolf that we don't have company?!
Duckula': Towser??
Nanny': Our werewolf!
Duckula': Igor ... do we have a werewolf?
Igor': Oh no, sir.
Duckula': Then why would we want to waste time chasing after werewolves to keep a werewolf that we don't have company?!
TV Show: Count Duckula
In the heart of Transyl-vania
In the Vampire Hall of Fame yeah
There's not a vampire zanier that
DUCKULA!
He won't bite beast or man
'Cos he's a vegetarian
AARRRRGH!!
And things never run to plan for
DUCKULA!
If you're lookin' for some fun
You can always count upon
The wild and wacky one they call
DUCKULA!
Heh, Heh, Heh. Count Duckula. Heh, Heh, Heh.
In the Vampire Hall of Fame yeah
There's not a vampire zanier that
DUCKULA!
He won't bite beast or man
'Cos he's a vegetarian
AARRRRGH!!
And things never run to plan for
DUCKULA!
If you're lookin' for some fun
You can always count upon
The wild and wacky one they call
DUCKULA!
Heh, Heh, Heh. Count Duckula. Heh, Heh, Heh.
TV Show: Count Duckula