Glee Quotes
Finn: Hey, man. Why didn't you show at the audition?
Sam: I wanted to. I really did. But after what Coach Beiste did to you...Do you know what everyone says about you Glee Guys?
Finn: Oh, yea, you get used to all that.
Sam: I wanted to. I really did. But after what Coach Beiste did to you...Do you know what everyone says about you Glee Guys?
Finn: Oh, yea, you get used to all that.
TV Show: Glee
Will: All right, who can tell me who Christopher Cross is?
Brittany: He discovered America.
Brittany: He discovered America.
TV Show: Glee
Kurt: There's a burgeoning Facebook campaign that has swelled to over FIVE members. Their ardent demand? That this week, at the fall homecoming assembly, the McKinley High School Glee Club perform a number by -- wait for it -- Ms. Britney Spears!
TV Show: Glee
Brittany: I don't want to do Britney.
Kurt: Why no Britney, Brittany?
Brittany: Because my name is also Britney Spears.
[Everyone looks at her.]
Will: Wait, what?
Mercedes: What the hell is she talking about?
Brittany: My middle name is Susan. My last name is Pierce, which makes me Brittany S. Pierce. Brittany Spierce.
Kurt: Why no Britney, Brittany?
Brittany: Because my name is also Britney Spears.
[Everyone looks at her.]
Will: Wait, what?
Mercedes: What the hell is she talking about?
Brittany: My middle name is Susan. My last name is Pierce, which makes me Brittany S. Pierce. Brittany Spierce.
TV Show: Glee
Brittany: I hope you all respect that Glee Club can remain a place where I, Brittany S. Pierce, can escape the torment of Britney Spears.
TV Show: Glee
Santana: Can I just say you are the hottest dentist I've ever seen?
Carl: I get that all the time.
Santana: You can drill me any time.
Carl: I get that all the time.
Santana: You can drill me any time.
TV Show: Glee
Artie: I think I might be better at brushing and flossing if I could see myself in the mirror.
Santana: There you go, blue tooth.
Brittany: I don't brush my teeth. I rinse my mouth out with soda after I eat. I was pretty sure Dr Pepper was a dentist.
Santana: There you go, blue tooth.
Brittany: I don't brush my teeth. I rinse my mouth out with soda after I eat. I was pretty sure Dr Pepper was a dentist.
TV Show: Glee
Brittany: This looks like the alien spaceship where I was probed.
Carl: Brittany, you have the worst teeth I've ever seen. You have cavities in every single tooth. It's got to be some sort of record.
Brittany: Please don't pull out all my teeth. When I smile, I'll look like an adult baby but with boobs.
Carl: Brittany, you have the worst teeth I've ever seen. You have cavities in every single tooth. It's got to be some sort of record.
Brittany: Please don't pull out all my teeth. When I smile, I'll look like an adult baby but with boobs.
TV Show: Glee
Brittany: Can I have a blue toothbrush?
Carl: I'll give you a hundred toothbrushes.
Brittany: Are you a cat?
Carl: I'll give you a hundred toothbrushes.
Brittany: Are you a cat?
TV Show: Glee
Santana: Look, my dad's a doctor, which means I have a killer health plan. Now get up in my grill, 'cause Brits and I wants to get our anesthesia on.
TV Show: Glee
Brittany: You're really hot.
Britney: You're sweet.
Brittany: And your breath smells really nice.
Brittney: So does yours. And you know why? Because this is a fantasy.
Brittany: Wow.
Britney: You're sweet.
Brittany: And your breath smells really nice.
Brittney: So does yours. And you know why? Because this is a fantasy.
Brittany: Wow.
TV Show: Glee
Brittany: I'm more talented than all of you. I see that clearly now. It's Brittany, bitch.
TV Show: Glee
Brittany: [touching Jacob's hair] Your hair looks like a Jewish cloud.
Jacob: [to Finn after Rachel walks away in her 'Baby One More Time' outfit] What do you want for her? I'll give you anything. I'll give you my house! I'll kill my parents and I'll give you my house!
Jacob: [to Finn after Rachel walks away in her 'Baby One More Time' outfit] What do you want for her? I'll give you anything. I'll give you my house! I'll kill my parents and I'll give you my house!
TV Show: Glee
Santana: Well, congratulations. Normally you dress like a fantasy of a perverted Japanese business man with a very dark specific fetish but I actually dig this look. Yay.
TV Show: Glee
Kurt: Geesh! Let loose will ya! STOP BEING SO FREAKIN' UPTIGHT ALL THE TIME!!!!
Will: Kurt, I will see you in the principal's office.
Will: Kurt, I will see you in the principal's office.
TV Show: Glee
Finn: Come here. [hugs Rachel] This is how it's going to happen. I'm going to be quarterback again and I'm going to throw a touchdown in our first game. Then I'm going to point to you in the stands so that everyone in this school knows that you're my girlfriend. All right?
TV Show: Glee
[Jacob and Lauren are watching New Directions perform 'Toxic' during the Homecoming Assembly]
Jacob: I love Britney Spears!
Lauren: I wanna be that hat!
Jacob: Take it off! Yes!
Lauren: Mr. Schue, let me be your Britney!
Jacob: [Moans, jumps up and down] It's so sexy! It's so sexy!
Lauren: Mr. Schue I want you!
Jacob: [Pointing at the stage] Don't stop doing that! Don't stop doing that! Yes! Yes! [Jacob grabs the butt of the person standing in front of him. It turns out to be a guy] Uh-oh. [The guy punches Jacob]
Sue: It's a Britney Spears sex riot! [Pulls the fire alarm]
Jacob: I love Britney Spears!
Lauren: I wanna be that hat!
Jacob: Take it off! Yes!
Lauren: Mr. Schue, let me be your Britney!
Jacob: [Moans, jumps up and down] It's so sexy! It's so sexy!
Lauren: Mr. Schue I want you!
Jacob: [Pointing at the stage] Don't stop doing that! Don't stop doing that! Yes! Yes! [Jacob grabs the butt of the person standing in front of him. It turns out to be a guy] Uh-oh. [The guy punches Jacob]
Sue: It's a Britney Spears sex riot! [Pulls the fire alarm]
TV Show: Glee
Sue: You know what William? That's what one Hubert Humphrey said back in 1968 at the start of the Democratic National Convention. But then hippies put acid in everyone's bourbon. And when an updraft revealed Lady Bird Johnson's tramp-stamp, and tattoos above her ovaries, Mayor Richard J. Daley became so incensed with sexual rage that he punched his own wife in the face. And spent the next hour screaming "Sex Party!" into the microphones of all three major networks.
TV Show: Glee
Sue: I'm gonna sue the pants off of you, Will. I'm going to take your house, your car, your extensive collection of vests — I mean, seriously, you wear more vests than the cast of Blossom.
TV Show: Glee
Emma: You're such a great teacher, Will. No, probably the best in the whole school. So why would you want to be someone else when the someone you already are is so amazing?
Will: Because the boring someone I already am, wasn't good enough for you.
Will: Because the boring someone I already am, wasn't good enough for you.
TV Show: Glee
Quinn: I said what you wanted me to say. And he shot me down. Congratulations, he must really love you.
TV Show: Glee
Rachel: I'd like to dedicate this song to my boyfriend, Finn. I was wrong, I shouldn't try to control you. I've just, I've never been this happy before. And I realize that I was trying to hold on to how you were making me feel so much that I was strangling you in my hands like a little bird. I get now that in order for this relationship to work, I have to open up my hands and let you fly free.
Brittany: Finn can fly?
Kurt: Really?
Brittany: Wait, I thought I was the only one getting the solos from now on. Next week I'm going to be performing a musical number by Ke$ha.
Mercedes: [to Brittany] Shh!
Brittany: Finn can fly?
Kurt: Really?
Brittany: Wait, I thought I was the only one getting the solos from now on. Next week I'm going to be performing a musical number by Ke$ha.
Mercedes: [to Brittany] Shh!
TV Show: Glee
Brittany: I would just like to say that from now on I demand to have every solo in glee club. When I had my teeth cleaned I had the most amazing Britney Spears fantasy. I sang and dance better than her. Now I realize what a powerful woman that I am.
TV Show: Glee
Finn: I was super hungry but my mom was gone so I busted out the George Foreman. It wasn't making cool grill marks like it used to after I tried to use it to dry my shoes, but when it comes to grilled cheese, I'm not that fancy.
TV Show: Glee
Finn: When I pulled the sandwich out, I saw the face of God. Literally: I have made a Grilled Cheesus. I’m not the most religious guy. I sort of worship Eric Clapton and Ochocinco.
TV Show: Glee
Finn: Dear Grilled Cheesus, first of all, you're super delicious. Please, Grilled Cheesus, please let us win our first football game. It would mean so much to Artie & I think you kind of owe it to him. I mean, you did kind of screw him in the leg department. And in return, Cheesy Lord, I'll make sure we honor you this week in Glee club.
TV Show: Glee