Inglourious Basterds Quotes
General Ed Fenech : [ On the Germans attending the film premeire ] We have all our rotten eggs in one basket. The objective of the operation: blow up the basket.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Col. Hans Landa : [ to Aldo ] So you're "Aldo the Apache".
Lt. Aldo Raine : So you're "the Jew Hunter".
Col. Hans Landa : A detective. A damn good dectective. Finding people is my specialty so naturally I work for the Nazis finding people, and yes some of them were Jews. But "Jew Hunter"?
Col. Hans Landa : [ reacts in disgust ] It's just a name that stuck.
Pfc. Smithson Utivich : Well, you do have to admit, it is catchy.
Col. Hans Landa : Do you control the nicknames your enemies bestow on you? "Aldo the Apache" and "the Little Man"?
Pfc. Smithson Utivich : [ confused ] What do you mean "the Little Man"?
Col. Hans Landa : Germans' nickname for you.
Pfc. Smithson Utivich : The Germans' nickname for me is "the Little Man"?
Col. Hans Landa : And as if to make my point, I'm a little surprised how tall you were in real life. I mean, you're a little fellow, but not circus-midget little, as your reputation would suggest.
Lt. Aldo Raine : So you're "the Jew Hunter".
Col. Hans Landa : A detective. A damn good dectective. Finding people is my specialty so naturally I work for the Nazis finding people, and yes some of them were Jews. But "Jew Hunter"?
Col. Hans Landa : [ reacts in disgust ] It's just a name that stuck.
Pfc. Smithson Utivich : Well, you do have to admit, it is catchy.
Col. Hans Landa : Do you control the nicknames your enemies bestow on you? "Aldo the Apache" and "the Little Man"?
Pfc. Smithson Utivich : [ confused ] What do you mean "the Little Man"?
Col. Hans Landa : Germans' nickname for you.
Pfc. Smithson Utivich : The Germans' nickname for me is "the Little Man"?
Col. Hans Landa : And as if to make my point, I'm a little surprised how tall you were in real life. I mean, you're a little fellow, but not circus-midget little, as your reputation would suggest.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Lt. Aldo Raine : You know, where I'm from...
Col. Hans Landa : Yeah, where is that, exactly?
Lt. Aldo Raine : Maynardville, Tennessee. [ pause ]
Lt. Aldo Raine : I've done my share of bootlegging. Up 'ere, if you engage in what the federal government calls 'illegal activity,' but what we call 'just a man tryin' to make a livin' for his family sellin' moonshine liquor,' it behooves oneself to keep his wits. Long story short, we hear a story too good to be true... it ain't.
Col. Hans Landa : Sitting in your chair, I would probably say the same thing. And 999 point 999 times out of a million, you would be correct. But in the pages of history, every once in a while, fate reaches out and extends its hand. [ Landa slowly sweeps his arms out in a grand shrug ]
Col. Hans Landa : What shall the history books read?
Col. Hans Landa : Yeah, where is that, exactly?
Lt. Aldo Raine : Maynardville, Tennessee. [ pause ]
Lt. Aldo Raine : I've done my share of bootlegging. Up 'ere, if you engage in what the federal government calls 'illegal activity,' but what we call 'just a man tryin' to make a livin' for his family sellin' moonshine liquor,' it behooves oneself to keep his wits. Long story short, we hear a story too good to be true... it ain't.
Col. Hans Landa : Sitting in your chair, I would probably say the same thing. And 999 point 999 times out of a million, you would be correct. But in the pages of history, every once in a while, fate reaches out and extends its hand. [ Landa slowly sweeps his arms out in a grand shrug ]
Col. Hans Landa : What shall the history books read?
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Sgt. Donny Donowitz : [ Points to Iron Cross medal ] Did you get that for killing Jews?
Sgt. Werner Rachtman : Bravery.
Sgt. Werner Rachtman : Bravery.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Bridget von Hammersmark : I can vouch for everything the young captain has just said. He *does* hail from the bottom of Piz Palu. He *was* in the film, and his brother *is* far more handsome than he.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Master SGT. Wilhelm : Who are you? British, American? What?
Lt. Aldo Raine : We're American! What're you?
Master SGT. Wilhelm : I'm a German, you idiot!
Lt. Aldo Raine : You speak English pretty good for a German.
Master SGT. Wilhelm : I agree.
Lt. Aldo Raine : We're American! What're you?
Master SGT. Wilhelm : I'm a German, you idiot!
Lt. Aldo Raine : You speak English pretty good for a German.
Master SGT. Wilhelm : I agree.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Lt. Aldo Raine : Enormous changes at the last minute? That's not very Germatic. Why the hell is Goebbels doin' stuff so damn peculiar.
Bridget von Hammersmark : It probably has something to do with the second development.
Lt. Aldo Raine : Which is?
Bridget von Hammersmark : The Führer is attending the premiere.
Adolf Hitler : [ cut to Hitler ] I've been rethinking my position in regards to your Paris premiere of "Nation's Pride". As the weeks have gone on and the Americans are on the beach, I do find myself thinking more and more about this Private Zoller. This boy has done something tremendous for us. And I'm beginning to think my participation in this event could be meaningful.
Sgt. Donny Donowitz : [ cut back to the Basterds ] Fuck A Duck!
Bridget von Hammersmark : It probably has something to do with the second development.
Lt. Aldo Raine : Which is?
Bridget von Hammersmark : The Führer is attending the premiere.
Adolf Hitler : [ cut to Hitler ] I've been rethinking my position in regards to your Paris premiere of "Nation's Pride". As the weeks have gone on and the Americans are on the beach, I do find myself thinking more and more about this Private Zoller. This boy has done something tremendous for us. And I'm beginning to think my participation in this event could be meaningful.
Sgt. Donny Donowitz : [ cut back to the Basterds ] Fuck A Duck!
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Marcel : [ seeing Shosanna dressed up for the premiere ] Ooh la la... Danielle Darrieux.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Joseph Goebbels : [ in German; subtitled ] How many seats in your auditorium?
Francesca Mondino : [ translates into French ]
Shosanna Dreyfus : [ in French; subtitled ] Three hundred and fifty.
Francesca Mondino : [ translates into German ]
Joseph Goebbels : That's almost four hundred less than the Ritz.
Fredrick Zoller : [ in German ] But Herr Goebbels, that's not such a bad thing. You said yourself you didn't want to indulge every two-faced French bourgeois taking up space currying favor. With less seats it makes the event more exclusive. You're not trying to fill the house, they're fighting for seats. Besides, to hell with the French. This is a German night, a German event, a German celebration. This night is for you, me, the German military, the High Command, their family and friends. The only people who should be allowed in the room are the people who will be moved by the exploits on the screen.
Joseph Goebbels : [ after a pause ] I see your public speaking has improved.
Francesca Mondino : [ translates into French ]
Shosanna Dreyfus : [ in French; subtitled ] Three hundred and fifty.
Francesca Mondino : [ translates into German ]
Joseph Goebbels : That's almost four hundred less than the Ritz.
Fredrick Zoller : [ in German ] But Herr Goebbels, that's not such a bad thing. You said yourself you didn't want to indulge every two-faced French bourgeois taking up space currying favor. With less seats it makes the event more exclusive. You're not trying to fill the house, they're fighting for seats. Besides, to hell with the French. This is a German night, a German event, a German celebration. This night is for you, me, the German military, the High Command, their family and friends. The only people who should be allowed in the room are the people who will be moved by the exploits on the screen.
Joseph Goebbels : [ after a pause ] I see your public speaking has improved.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Col. Hans Landa : So who are your three handsome escorts?
Bridget von Hammersmark : I'm afraid neither of the three speak a word of German. They're friends of mine from Italy. This is the wonderful Italian stuntman, Enzo Gorlomi; a very talented cameraman, Antonio Margheriti; and Enzo's camera assistant, Domonick DeCocco.
Bridget von Hammersmark : [ in Italian ] Gentlemen, this is an old friend, Colonel Hans Landa.
Lt. Aldo Raine : [ southern accent ] Bawn gorno.
Bridget von Hammersmark : I'm afraid neither of the three speak a word of German. They're friends of mine from Italy. This is the wonderful Italian stuntman, Enzo Gorlomi; a very talented cameraman, Antonio Margheriti; and Enzo's camera assistant, Domonick DeCocco.
Bridget von Hammersmark : [ in Italian ] Gentlemen, this is an old friend, Colonel Hans Landa.
Lt. Aldo Raine : [ southern accent ] Bawn gorno.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
[ Marcel is beating up a sound technician ]
Shosanna Dreyfus : [ brandishing an ax ] Bring that fucker over here!
Shosanna Dreyfus : [ brandishing an ax ] Bring that fucker over here!
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Adolf Hitler : How did you survive this ordeal?
Pvt. Butz : They let me go.
Adolf Hitler : You are not to tell anybody anything! Not one word of detail! Your outfit was ambushed and you got away! Not one word more!
Pvt. Butz : Yes, mein fuhrer.
Adolf Hitler : Did they mark you like they did they did the other survivors?
Pvt. Butz : [ removing his hat, Hitler is stunned ] Yes mein fuhrer.
Pvt. Butz : They let me go.
Adolf Hitler : You are not to tell anybody anything! Not one word of detail! Your outfit was ambushed and you got away! Not one word more!
Pvt. Butz : Yes, mein fuhrer.
Adolf Hitler : Did they mark you like they did they did the other survivors?
Pvt. Butz : [ removing his hat, Hitler is stunned ] Yes mein fuhrer.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Lt. Aldo Raine : [ to Utivitch ] Ask him what he is gonna do with his uniform when he gets home.
Pvt. Butz : [ through an interperter ] Not only do I intend to take off my uniform, I intend to burn it.
Lt. Aldo Raine : Nah, see, we don't like that. We like our Nazis in uniform. That way we can spot 'em just like that. We're gonna give you a little something you cant take off.
Pvt. Butz : [ through an interperter ] Not only do I intend to take off my uniform, I intend to burn it.
Lt. Aldo Raine : Nah, see, we don't like that. We like our Nazis in uniform. That way we can spot 'em just like that. We're gonna give you a little something you cant take off.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Adolf Hitler : Why not? They seem to elude capture like an apparition! They seem to be able to appear and disappear at will. You want to prove they're flesh and blood? Then bring them to me! I will hang them naked, by their heels from the Eiffel Tower! And then throw their bodies into the sewers for the rats of Paris to feast on!
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Lt. Aldo Raine : Y'know... Utivich 'n myself heard that deal you made with the brass. "End the war tonight"?... I'd make that deal. How 'bout you Utivich, you make that deal?
Pfc. Smithson Utivich : [ busy scalping Herrmann ] I'd make that deal.
Lt. Aldo Raine : I don't blame ya! Damn good deal! And that purty little nest you feathered for yourself. Well, if you're willing to barbecue the whole high command, I 'spose that's worth certain considerations. But I do have one question. When you get to your little place on Nantucket Island, I 'magine you're gonna take off that handsome-lookin' S.S. uniform of yours, ain'tcha?... That's what I thought. Now that I can't abide. How 'bout you Utivich, can you abide it?
Pfc. Smithson Utivich : [ finishes scalping Herrmann ] Not one damn bit, sir.
Lt. Aldo Raine : I mean, if I had my way... you'd wear that goddamn uniform for the rest of your pecker-suckin' life. But I'm aware that ain't practical, I mean at some point you're gonna hafta take it off. So. I'm 'onna give you a little somethin' you can't take off. [ Cut to Landa screaming and crying as Raine carves a swastika into his forehead ]
Lt. Aldo Raine : You know somethin', Utivich? I think this just might be my masterpiece. [ Raine and Utvich grin sardonically as the credits roll ]
Pfc. Smithson Utivich : [ busy scalping Herrmann ] I'd make that deal.
Lt. Aldo Raine : I don't blame ya! Damn good deal! And that purty little nest you feathered for yourself. Well, if you're willing to barbecue the whole high command, I 'spose that's worth certain considerations. But I do have one question. When you get to your little place on Nantucket Island, I 'magine you're gonna take off that handsome-lookin' S.S. uniform of yours, ain'tcha?... That's what I thought. Now that I can't abide. How 'bout you Utivich, can you abide it?
Pfc. Smithson Utivich : [ finishes scalping Herrmann ] Not one damn bit, sir.
Lt. Aldo Raine : I mean, if I had my way... you'd wear that goddamn uniform for the rest of your pecker-suckin' life. But I'm aware that ain't practical, I mean at some point you're gonna hafta take it off. So. I'm 'onna give you a little somethin' you can't take off. [ Cut to Landa screaming and crying as Raine carves a swastika into his forehead ]
Lt. Aldo Raine : You know somethin', Utivich? I think this just might be my masterpiece. [ Raine and Utvich grin sardonically as the credits roll ]
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Sgt. Donny Donowitz : [ pointing a badge ] Did you get that for killing jews?
Pfc. Hirschberg : Bravery [ Donny nods and puts his bat next to his head... ]
Pfc. Hirschberg : Bravery [ Donny nods and puts his bat next to his head... ]
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Col. Hans Landa : Gentlemen, I have no intention of killing Hitler and killing Goebbels and killing Göring and killing Bormann, not to mention winning the war single-handedly for the Allies, only later to find myself standing before a Jewish tribunal. If you want to win the war, tonight; [ Landa lightly chops his lands down against the table ]
Col. Hans Landa : ...we have to make a deal.
Lt. Aldo Raine : What kind of deal?
Col. Hans Landa : The kind you wouldn't have the authority to make. However, I'm sure this mission of yours has a commanding officer. A general. I'm betting for... OSS would be my guess.
Col. Hans Landa : ...we have to make a deal.
Lt. Aldo Raine : What kind of deal?
Col. Hans Landa : The kind you wouldn't have the authority to make. However, I'm sure this mission of yours has a commanding officer. A general. I'm betting for... OSS would be my guess.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds