Mock the Week Quote
Andy Parsons: Royal Mail parcel delivery. We called, you were in, so we ran away before you could answer.
Russell Howard: Just three pounds a month will save last year's "X Factor" winner from starving.
Hugh Dennis: Do you know what's in your attic? It's me, I've been there since Christmas.
Ed Byrne: Have you seen this dog? No? Maybe your windows are too dirty. Call Kevin the Window Cleaner.
Andy Parsons: Are you looking for a dog walking service? Then call Ace Kebabs on 318 318.
Hugh Dennis: Computer problems? Let me come round and swear at it.
Russell Howard: Why has your girlfriend stopped changing near the window? Love, Dad.
Chris Addison: Pizza: buy one, pay full price.
Ed Byrne: How's my driving? Call 0800 CRASHEDINTOYOURHOUSE.
Kevin Bridges: Dear Miss Winehouse, congratulations on turning 100. Best wishes, the queen.
Hugh Dennis: Need a room cleaning? Call me. I'll come round and fart in it.
Andy Parsons: Looking for an undertaker? Why not call Ace Kebabs on 318 318?
Chris Addison: Gardening service. Middle of the night a specialty. Call Rose West on Broadmoor- (audience starts booing) Too soon? Too soon?
Ed Byrne: Hello, my name's Ashley Cole. Here's a picture of me naked.
Hugh Dennis: Would you recognize a fake ID? No? Great, I'll be back in ten minutes.
Andy Parsons: The Taj Mahal Indian restuarant. Formerly Ace Kebabs.
Russell Howard: Open your letterbox. It's me! (buzz) I'll get through one day. (Hugh Dennis walks in and looks at Russell)
Russell Howard: Just three pounds a month will save last year's "X Factor" winner from starving.
Hugh Dennis: Do you know what's in your attic? It's me, I've been there since Christmas.
Ed Byrne: Have you seen this dog? No? Maybe your windows are too dirty. Call Kevin the Window Cleaner.
Andy Parsons: Are you looking for a dog walking service? Then call Ace Kebabs on 318 318.
Hugh Dennis: Computer problems? Let me come round and swear at it.
Russell Howard: Why has your girlfriend stopped changing near the window? Love, Dad.
Chris Addison: Pizza: buy one, pay full price.
Ed Byrne: How's my driving? Call 0800 CRASHEDINTOYOURHOUSE.
Kevin Bridges: Dear Miss Winehouse, congratulations on turning 100. Best wishes, the queen.
Hugh Dennis: Need a room cleaning? Call me. I'll come round and fart in it.
Andy Parsons: Looking for an undertaker? Why not call Ace Kebabs on 318 318?
Chris Addison: Gardening service. Middle of the night a specialty. Call Rose West on Broadmoor- (audience starts booing) Too soon? Too soon?
Ed Byrne: Hello, my name's Ashley Cole. Here's a picture of me naked.
Hugh Dennis: Would you recognize a fake ID? No? Great, I'll be back in ten minutes.
Andy Parsons: The Taj Mahal Indian restuarant. Formerly Ace Kebabs.
Russell Howard: Open your letterbox. It's me! (buzz) I'll get through one day. (Hugh Dennis walks in and looks at Russell)
TV Show: Mock the Week
