Neighbors Quotes
Peter McGowan: Seems to me only the intelligent people are choosing not to reproduce.
Movie: Neighbors
Peter McGowen: ...but maybe that's everything in writing - a catchy title.
Debra Salhany: So is that why you decided to call your first novel How to Kill Your Neighbor's Dog?
Peter McGowen: Oh, that isn't mere affectation. That's a practical guidebook full of juicy bits on suburban terrorism.
Debra Salhany: ...but, uh, what if somebody reads this and goes out and kills their neighbor's dog?
Peter McGowen: Oh, well, what are you gonna do?
Debra Salhany: So is that why you decided to call your first novel How to Kill Your Neighbor's Dog?
Peter McGowen: Oh, that isn't mere affectation. That's a practical guidebook full of juicy bits on suburban terrorism.
Debra Salhany: ...but, uh, what if somebody reads this and goes out and kills their neighbor's dog?
Peter McGowen: Oh, well, what are you gonna do?
Movie: Neighbors
Ramona: I don't care about your weight or your false teeth.
Earl Keese: I haven't got false teeth!
Ramona: I'm sorry, I guess they just look false.
Earl Keese: I haven't got false teeth!
Ramona: I'm sorry, I guess they just look false.
Movie: Neighbors
Ramona: I don't care about your weight or your false teeth.
Earl Keese: I haven't got false teeth!
Ramona: I'm sorry, I guess they just look false.
Earl Keese: I haven't got false teeth!
Ramona: I'm sorry, I guess they just look false.
Movie: Neighbors
Ramona: You should have slipped it through the mail slot while you had the chance, Earl.
Movie: Neighbors
Terri: [after sex] Where are you going?
Jerry: [Bitter] Out. I wanna talk, I wanna chat.
Terri: We can talk. I just don't want something up my ass while we're doing it.
Jerry: [Bitter] Out. I wanna talk, I wanna chat.
Terri: We can talk. I just don't want something up my ass while we're doing it.
Movie: Neighbors
Vic: Stay here on the outer limits of the dead end zone? Nothing personal, but life at the end of the road just ain't for Captain Vic and Empress Ramona. Sorry folks, but you can color us gone.
Movie: Neighbors
Vic: We're waiting, or do I have to pound it out of you?
Earl Keese: Don't ever speak to me like that in my own house!
Vic: Why would I?
Earl Keese: You just did.
Vic: I didn't mean anything - it's just something a guy says.
Earl Keese: I never say it.
Vic: I don't blame you.
Earl Keese: Don't ever speak to me like that in my own house!
Vic: Why would I?
Earl Keese: You just did.
Vic: I didn't mean anything - it's just something a guy says.
Earl Keese: I never say it.
Vic: I don't blame you.
Movie: Neighbors
[Larry is dressed as a priest]
Peter McGowan: Can I have a valediction, father?
Larry: Say four holy **** You's and keep drinking.
Peter McGowan: Can I have a valediction, father?
Larry: Say four holy **** You's and keep drinking.
Movie: Neighbors
[Peter is smoking]
Melanie McGowan: You know, you're going to have to cut that out when the baby comes.
Peter McGowan: What? Are you expecting it tonight?
Melanie McGowan: You know, you're going to have to cut that out when the baby comes.
Peter McGowan: What? Are you expecting it tonight?
Movie: Neighbors
[Traffic report]
Laura Leeton: If the 405 is your morning route, I hope you don't have a history of showing up late to work, 'cause today you're fired.
Laura Leeton: If the 405 is your morning route, I hope you don't have a history of showing up late to work, 'cause today you're fired.
Movie: Neighbors
[Donald hears the doorbell ring and he begrudgingly answers it]
Donald Duck: [angrily] Now look here, I...
[He sees Pete and his dog Muncey at the door. Pete is holding a bowl of some soup-like liquid]
Pete: Hi, neighbor.
[Pete hands Donald the bowl]
Pete: Try this.
Donald Duck: [taking the bowl] Oh, thank you.
[He samples and savors the soup]
Donald Duck: Mm-mm! Delicious!
Pete: [to Muncey] See? He eats it.
[Donald gags and sputters on the liquid and looks shocked]
Pete: [walking away with Muncey] The trouble with you, Muncey, you're too finicky.
Donald Duck: [angrily] Now look here, I...
[He sees Pete and his dog Muncey at the door. Pete is holding a bowl of some soup-like liquid]
Pete: Hi, neighbor.
[Pete hands Donald the bowl]
Pete: Try this.
Donald Duck: [taking the bowl] Oh, thank you.
[He samples and savors the soup]
Donald Duck: Mm-mm! Delicious!
Pete: [to Muncey] See? He eats it.
[Donald gags and sputters on the liquid and looks shocked]
Pete: [walking away with Muncey] The trouble with you, Muncey, you're too finicky.
Movie: Neighbors
Adam: They say women are the sensitive ones, but I've never seen it. They're as cold as party ice.
Victoria: I don't think that sucking on countless nipples makes one an authority on sensitivity.
Victoria: I don't think that sucking on countless nipples makes one an authority on sensitivity.
Movie: Neighbors
Adam: They say women are the sensitive ones, but I've never seen it. They're as cold as party ice.
Victoria: I don't think that sucking on countless nipples makes one an authority on sensitivity.
Victoria: I don't think that sucking on countless nipples makes one an authority on sensitivity.
Movie: Neighbors
Barney Rubble: Looks like somebody's moving a house, sheesh what a spooky looking place.
Fred Flintstone: Where do you suppose they're moving it to, the city dump?
Barney Rubble: [thunder crashes, lightning strikes and a vulture laughs] Wow! Did you see that?
Fred Flintstone: [comes back up from hiding] How would you like to have that living next door to you?
Barney Rubble: There goes the neighborhood.
Fred Flintstone: Where do you suppose they're moving it to, the city dump?
Barney Rubble: [thunder crashes, lightning strikes and a vulture laughs] Wow! Did you see that?
Fred Flintstone: [comes back up from hiding] How would you like to have that living next door to you?
Barney Rubble: There goes the neighborhood.
Movie: Neighbors
Barry: Do you think you're good?
Cary: What?
Barry: I mean, do you think you're a good person?
Cary: Hey, come on, I'm trying to eat lunch here.
Cary: What?
Barry: I mean, do you think you're a good person?
Cary: Hey, come on, I'm trying to eat lunch here.
Movie: Neighbors
Barry: I just think for right now, we need to treat each other like... meat. Right? Didn't we read that? You need to see me as a - a big - a penis. And you need to be just this huge vagina... to me.
Movie: Neighbors
Debra Salhany: So, how did you meet your wife?
Peter McGowan: She was a lap dancer, I had a pocket full of singles... No, she was a dancer. For a brief period, she gave acting a try. She came in for an audition, and the rest as they say is histrionics.
Debra Salhany: So, you employed the casting couch?
Peter McGowan: Hey, whatever works. You know that, Deborah.
Peter McGowan: She was a lap dancer, I had a pocket full of singles... No, she was a dancer. For a brief period, she gave acting a try. She came in for an audition, and the rest as they say is histrionics.
Debra Salhany: So, you employed the casting couch?
Peter McGowan: Hey, whatever works. You know that, Deborah.
Movie: Neighbors
Edna: You look just like my son-in-law.
Peter McGowan: I am your son-in-law, Edna.
Edna: My son-in-law's name is Peter.
Peter McGowan: No. I said your name was Edna. My name is Peter.
Edna: You just said your name was Edna... Edna's a funny name for a man. Been teased over the years?
Peter McGowan: Mercilessly. Pete.
Peter McGowan: I am your son-in-law, Edna.
Edna: My son-in-law's name is Peter.
Peter McGowan: No. I said your name was Edna. My name is Peter.
Edna: You just said your name was Edna... Edna's a funny name for a man. Been teased over the years?
Peter McGowan: Mercilessly. Pete.
Movie: Neighbors
Frank Frankenstone: [Stubby comes up from the basement] And this is our youngest, Stubby.
Hidea Frankenstone: Stubby, say hello to Mrs. Flintstone.
Stubby Frankenstone: Hello.
Wilma Flintstone: Hello Stubby, what're you doing with that shovel?
Stubby Frankenstone: Digging graves in the cellar.
Fred Flintstone: Huh? D-digging graves in the ce-cellar?
Hidea Frankenstone: [laughs] It keeps him in the house you know.
Hidea Frankenstone: Stubby, say hello to Mrs. Flintstone.
Stubby Frankenstone: Hello.
Wilma Flintstone: Hello Stubby, what're you doing with that shovel?
Stubby Frankenstone: Digging graves in the cellar.
Fred Flintstone: Huh? D-digging graves in the ce-cellar?
Hidea Frankenstone: [laughs] It keeps him in the house you know.
Movie: Neighbors
Vic: Believe me, I know women - upside down and backwards, which is not a bad way to know 'em, huh?
Movie: Neighbors
Vic: In light of Earl's feelings, I think it would be best if we left.
Enid Keese: Oh, no, no. Sit down, sit down. Let's finish this magnificent meal. Don't worry about Earl. He'll get over his feelings.
Vic: He spurned my sauce!
Enid Keese: No, he loves your sauce. He's just jealous, he can't cook.
Enid Keese: Oh, no, no. Sit down, sit down. Let's finish this magnificent meal. Don't worry about Earl. He'll get over his feelings.
Vic: He spurned my sauce!
Enid Keese: No, he loves your sauce. He's just jealous, he can't cook.
Movie: Neighbors
Fred Flintstone: Honest, Wilma, vultures and bats, and a dark rain cloud over the roof. They HAD to be taking it to the city dump.
Wilma Flintstone: Vultures and bats? Who'd want to live in a creepy house like that?
Fred Flintstone: I don't know, well whoever they are, I wouldn't want to know them.
Barney Rubble: [knocking] Hey Fred, open up!
Betty Rubble: [Fred opens the door] Wilma, you poor dear, I'm so sorry.
Wilma Flintstone: About what?
Fred Flintstone: Yeah, what do you mean?
Barney Rubble: Oh bad news, Fred, look out the window.
[Fred and Wilma look out the window]
Wilma Flintstone: Fred!
Fred Flintstone: No! Tell me it isn't true!
Wilma Flintstone: [the spooky house is next door to them] That looks like the creepy house you were telling me about!
Fred Flintstone: They must've bought the lot next door!
Wilma Flintstone: Vultures and bats? Who'd want to live in a creepy house like that?
Fred Flintstone: I don't know, well whoever they are, I wouldn't want to know them.
Barney Rubble: [knocking] Hey Fred, open up!
Betty Rubble: [Fred opens the door] Wilma, you poor dear, I'm so sorry.
Wilma Flintstone: About what?
Fred Flintstone: Yeah, what do you mean?
Barney Rubble: Oh bad news, Fred, look out the window.
[Fred and Wilma look out the window]
Wilma Flintstone: Fred!
Fred Flintstone: No! Tell me it isn't true!
Wilma Flintstone: [the spooky house is next door to them] That looks like the creepy house you were telling me about!
Fred Flintstone: They must've bought the lot next door!
Movie: Neighbors