Red vs. Blue Quote
Simmons: Hey, that's not exactly what happened.
Grif: Yes, it is. You said, "I'm not going to the Vegas Quadrant", and then the next thing I know you're in an escape pod heading for-
Donut: (interrupting) Excuse me uh, sirs...
Grif: Sirs? Oh crap.
Donut: I was told to report to Blood Gulch outpost #1 and speak to whoever's in charge.
Grif: Sorry, man, Sarge is at command getting orders, ain't nobody in charge today.
Simmons: Actually, private, he left me in charge while he's gone.
Grif: You are such a kiss-ass.
Simmons: Also, he told me that if I had any trouble from you I should *cough* (mimicking Sarge) 'Get in the Warthog, and crush your head like a tomato can.'
Grif: ... That's the worst impression I've ever heard.
Simmons: Okay, rookie, what's your story?
Donut: Private Donut reporting for duty sir! Ready to fight some aliens.
Grif: Couple of things here, rookie. First off, 'Private Donut'? I think somebody needs a new nickname. Secondly, what's with the armor color?
Donut: This is the standard issue red.
Grif: Yeah, I know. Listen, only two kinds of people wear standard issue armor, officers and recruits, and since you're not threatening to gut me like a fish, you're probably not an Officer.
Donut: (referring to Simmons) Well, he's wearing red armor.
Simmons: No. My armor is maroon. Your armor is red.
Donut: Well, how do I get a different color armor?
Grif: Oh, man, I bet the Blues don't have to put up with this kind of crap.
Grif: Yes, it is. You said, "I'm not going to the Vegas Quadrant", and then the next thing I know you're in an escape pod heading for-
Donut: (interrupting) Excuse me uh, sirs...
Grif: Sirs? Oh crap.
Donut: I was told to report to Blood Gulch outpost #1 and speak to whoever's in charge.
Grif: Sorry, man, Sarge is at command getting orders, ain't nobody in charge today.
Simmons: Actually, private, he left me in charge while he's gone.
Grif: You are such a kiss-ass.
Simmons: Also, he told me that if I had any trouble from you I should *cough* (mimicking Sarge) 'Get in the Warthog, and crush your head like a tomato can.'
Grif: ... That's the worst impression I've ever heard.
Simmons: Okay, rookie, what's your story?
Donut: Private Donut reporting for duty sir! Ready to fight some aliens.
Grif: Couple of things here, rookie. First off, 'Private Donut'? I think somebody needs a new nickname. Secondly, what's with the armor color?
Donut: This is the standard issue red.
Grif: Yeah, I know. Listen, only two kinds of people wear standard issue armor, officers and recruits, and since you're not threatening to gut me like a fish, you're probably not an Officer.
Donut: (referring to Simmons) Well, he's wearing red armor.
Simmons: No. My armor is maroon. Your armor is red.
Donut: Well, how do I get a different color armor?
Grif: Oh, man, I bet the Blues don't have to put up with this kind of crap.
TV Show: Red vs. Blue
