Saved by the Bell Quotes
Alan: Hey stop with fat jokes or I'll sit on you!
Zack: OOO This is getting heavy. (mockingly)
Zack: OOO This is getting heavy. (mockingly)
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Lisa: 9 seconds? I can't even get to the bottom of my purse in 9 seconds!
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
[Zack and Mr. Belding face each other in an American-Gladiators-style joust]
Mr. Belding: I've been waiting for this day, Morris. This one's for you, and your sweet little girlfriend Kelly.
Lt. Chet: Ready?! Go!
Zack: Oh, hi, Mrs. Belding.
Mr. Belding: My wife's here?
[Zack knocks him off]
Lt. Chet: 1 second! A new record!
Mr. Belding: I've been waiting for this day, Morris. This one's for you, and your sweet little girlfriend Kelly.
Lt. Chet: Ready?! Go!
Zack: Oh, hi, Mrs. Belding.
Mr. Belding: My wife's here?
[Zack knocks him off]
Lt. Chet: 1 second! A new record!
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Lisa: By the way, are you married?
Lt. Chet: By the way, yes.
Lisa: By the way, adios!
Lt. Chet: By the way, yes.
Lisa: By the way, adios!
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Slater: Let's look at the old scoreboard... I mean... hey... it's not THAT old.
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Nerd #1: [after hearing Slater on the air] Boy, that guy stinks.
Nerd #2: Yeah, somebody should wave a skunk in front of him.
Nerd #2: Yeah, somebody should wave a skunk in front of him.
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Screech: [sees a picture of the Beatles] Hey, who are the three guys with Paul McCartney?
Zack: That's the Beatles, you idiot!
Screech: Paul wouldn't have made it if he were stuck with those wimps.
Zack: That's the Beatles, you idiot!
Screech: Paul wouldn't have made it if he were stuck with those wimps.
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Zack: [on seeing a picture of Mr. Belding mooning the school board in an old school newspaper] Woah, now there's a side of him I've never seen!
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Screech: Once, my dad let me back his car out of the garage. Then he got mad at me.
Mr. Tuttle: Well Screech, your father was probably just nervous.
Screech: Well, he had a right to be - I forgot to open the garage door.
Lisa: I hope your dad had "dork" insurance.
Mr. Tuttle: Well Screech, your father was probably just nervous.
Screech: Well, he had a right to be - I forgot to open the garage door.
Lisa: I hope your dad had "dork" insurance.
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Mr. Tuttle (after Zack has been caught and forced to reveal his scheme): Wow! Good plan!
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Mr. Tuttle: Miss Turtle, what is the first thing we do when we get behind the wheel?
Lisa: Adjust the mirrors.
Mr. Tuttle: Correct. And for what purpose?
Lisa: To check my make-up.
Mr. Tuttle: Miss Turtle, I suggest you study harder, or start practicing how to say "taxi!"
Lisa: Adjust the mirrors.
Mr. Tuttle: Correct. And for what purpose?
Lisa: To check my make-up.
Mr. Tuttle: Miss Turtle, I suggest you study harder, or start practicing how to say "taxi!"
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Maxwell: Here's a buck babe, just for being beautiful.
Jessie: Here's a dirty look just for being alive.
Jessie: Here's a dirty look just for being alive.
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Slater (assuring Jessie what will happen to her on her date with a geek): Once you go geek, you never go back!
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Slater: Hey, Screech. Want me to get you anything? A Coke, some fries...a hot dog?
Screech: (crying) Dog? (puts head on table)
ZacK: So what if they had him since he was a puppy?
Screech: (squeaks) Puppy?
Jessie: All right, one date. But Nerdstrom better keep his paws off me.
Screech: (wails) Paws!
Screech: (crying) Dog? (puts head on table)
ZacK: So what if they had him since he was a puppy?
Screech: (squeaks) Puppy?
Jessie: All right, one date. But Nerdstrom better keep his paws off me.
Screech: (wails) Paws!
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Mrs. Powers: Zachary?
Zack: (jumps up) Yes, Mrs. Powers? (crosses arms)
Mrs. Powers: There's something wrong with the statue.
Screech: There is?
Mrs. Powers: Yes. (turns statue to the kitchen) Elvis likes to face the kitchen so he can watch me cook!
Zack: (jumps up) Yes, Mrs. Powers? (crosses arms)
Mrs. Powers: There's something wrong with the statue.
Screech: There is?
Mrs. Powers: Yes. (turns statue to the kitchen) Elvis likes to face the kitchen so he can watch me cook!
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Mr. Belding: Penny will meet you at the mall at seven.
Zack: Why at the mall?
Mr. Belding: Because I don't want you to know where I live.
Zack: That's understandable, sir.
Zack: Why at the mall?
Mr. Belding: Because I don't want you to know where I live.
Zack: That's understandable, sir.
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Mr. Belding: Another afternoon in detention, number nine in the series...
Zack: No, I think that's number eight.
Mr. Belding: No, number eight was when you sold the school to the Japanese.
Zack: Ahh...What was wrong with Honda High School?
Zack: No, I think that's number eight.
Mr. Belding: No, number eight was when you sold the school to the Japanese.
Zack: Ahh...What was wrong with Honda High School?
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Screech: Do I look that desperate for a date? (looks into mirror, then back at Zack) What time do I pick her up?
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Zack: What's with the wig?
Screech: Oh, do you like it? It gives me that extra bit of...Zackosity.
Zack: I'm gonna kick your Zackosity if you don't take Penny and get lost!
Screech: Oh, do you like it? It gives me that extra bit of...Zackosity.
Zack: I'm gonna kick your Zackosity if you don't take Penny and get lost!
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Mr. Belding: [on giving Zack detention] It's going to happen, Morris.
Zack: Not until cows give Pepsi.
Zack: Not until cows give Pepsi.
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Zack: This week is our geometry midterm. Hey, I'm not worried, I always sit next to smart nerds.
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Slater: [Jessie is taking caffeine pills] Those pills are dangerous.
Jessie: Yeah, well, so's geometry!
Jessie: Yeah, well, so's geometry!
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Jessie: [crying in Zack's arms] I'm so excited... I'm so excited... [sobbing] ... I'm so... scared.
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
Slater: Hmmmm, cramming your pretty little head with geometry?
Jessie: Is there a sexist point to your question?
Slater: Yeah, guys are great at math. It's just too bad you weren't born a man.
Jessie: Yeah, it's a shame you weren't born one either.
Jessie: Is there a sexist point to your question?
Slater: Yeah, guys are great at math. It's just too bad you weren't born a man.
Jessie: Yeah, it's a shame you weren't born one either.
TV Show: Saved by the Bell
[Zack admits to have gone into the ladies locker room]
Jessie: You violated our privacy? That's DISGUSTING, isn't it, Slater?
Slater: Uhhh... yeah, Preppie, you out to be ashamed of yourself. I'm disgusted.
[whispers in Zack's ear]
Slater: Next time, bring ME.
Jessie: You violated our privacy? That's DISGUSTING, isn't it, Slater?
Slater: Uhhh... yeah, Preppie, you out to be ashamed of yourself. I'm disgusted.
[whispers in Zack's ear]
Slater: Next time, bring ME.
TV Show: Saved by the Bell