Stargate SG-1 Quotes
Col. O'Neill: Well, we're not gonna stand around doing nothing.
Dr. Jackson: We're not doing nothing.
Col. O'Neill: You're videotaping a plant.
Dr. Jackson: Well, I think this might be important.
Col. O'Neill: Well, I think you might be losing what's left of your mind.
Dr. Jackson: [Pause] ... What's that supposed to mean?
Col. O'Neill: It means that on a good day, you can be a little flaky.
Dr. Jackson: And on a good day you can be a little ignorant and condescending.
Col. O'Neill: Not condescending. You're obviously misreading a basic philosophical difference in opinion on how to handle a crisis.
Dr. Jackson: Oh, please! We have a-a difference of opinion on just about everything.
Col. O'Neill: Gimme an example.
Dr. Jackson: I dunno, pick something! How about -- how about mythology?
Col. O'Neill: Rumors, lies, fairytales.
Dr. Jackson: [Finally losing it, jumping around in a frustrated circle] Y'see?! See? See? See? See?? See?? Mythology is one of the primary motivations for cultural development!
Col. O'Neill: Maybe it is; what's that got to do with filming a plant?!
Dr. Jackson: Exactly!
Col. O'Neill: What does that mean?!
Dr. Jackson: I don't know!
Dr. Jackson: We're not doing nothing.
Col. O'Neill: You're videotaping a plant.
Dr. Jackson: Well, I think this might be important.
Col. O'Neill: Well, I think you might be losing what's left of your mind.
Dr. Jackson: [Pause] ... What's that supposed to mean?
Col. O'Neill: It means that on a good day, you can be a little flaky.
Dr. Jackson: And on a good day you can be a little ignorant and condescending.
Col. O'Neill: Not condescending. You're obviously misreading a basic philosophical difference in opinion on how to handle a crisis.
Dr. Jackson: Oh, please! We have a-a difference of opinion on just about everything.
Col. O'Neill: Gimme an example.
Dr. Jackson: I dunno, pick something! How about -- how about mythology?
Col. O'Neill: Rumors, lies, fairytales.
Dr. Jackson: [Finally losing it, jumping around in a frustrated circle] Y'see?! See? See? See? See?? See?? Mythology is one of the primary motivations for cultural development!
Col. O'Neill: Maybe it is; what's that got to do with filming a plant?!
Dr. Jackson: Exactly!
Col. O'Neill: What does that mean?!
Dr. Jackson: I don't know!
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Dr. Jackson: Y'know I thought the alien on the video looked fairly docile, more curious than harmful.
Col. O'Neill: I thought it looked... bald, white and naked.
Col. O'Neill: I thought it looked... bald, white and naked.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Hammond: So this inaudible sound was making you sick, but not in the same way that it was affecting the aliens? They need the sound to live but we altered it by harming the organism that makes the sound?
O'Neill: Sounds right.
O'Neill: Sounds right.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Col. O'Neill: The plant is making that sound?!
Capt. Carter: Sir, it's an alien organism on another planet.
Col. O'Neill: Good point.
Capt. Carter: Sir, it's an alien organism on another planet.
Col. O'Neill: Good point.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Charlie: Mother says the boys of your culture don't cry.
Col. O'Neill: Not true! In fact there's an official list of reasons for which crying is a good thing.
Charlie: Mother is leaving.
Col. O'Neill: See, that's a good reason. "Mom Leaving" is, I believe, number six on the list of good reasons. Actually, six is "Mom Says She's Leaving in a Couple of Days." Five is "Mom Leaving Immediately." Four, of course, is "Mom Already Left." Three—now, three is huge, one of the biggest ones on the list—
Col. O'Neill: Not true! In fact there's an official list of reasons for which crying is a good thing.
Charlie: Mother is leaving.
Col. O'Neill: See, that's a good reason. "Mom Leaving" is, I believe, number six on the list of good reasons. Actually, six is "Mom Says She's Leaving in a Couple of Days." Five is "Mom Leaving Immediately." Four, of course, is "Mom Already Left." Three—now, three is huge, one of the biggest ones on the list—
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Gen. Hammond: [While examining the monitor blasted by "Mother"] Theories? Suggestions?
Capt. Carter: Seems obvious this Re'tu exists.
Col. O'Neill: Well, here's a question: How do we deal with an invisible threat?
Capt. Carter: We need a way to detect them.
Col. O'Neill: That would be helpful.
Capt. Carter: Seems obvious this Re'tu exists.
Col. O'Neill: Well, here's a question: How do we deal with an invisible threat?
Capt. Carter: We need a way to detect them.
Col. O'Neill: That would be helpful.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Gen. Hammond: [After the teams return from the Re'tu planet] So you would say threat assessment is high... [Turns to O'Neill]
Col. O'Neill: Oh yeah.
Capt. Carter: There were a lot of them, sir.
Teal'c: They are indeed invisible.
Col. O'Neill: Oh yeah.
Capt. Carter: There were a lot of them, sir.
Teal'c: They are indeed invisible.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
[A guard comes to get the SG-1 team.]
Guard: [in Russian] ?? ????????? ??????? [Are you Soviet spies?]
Dr. Jackson: [in Russian] ???. [No.]
Col. O'Neill: Daniel?
Dr. Jackson: He just asked if we were Soviet spies… oh.
Jack O'Neill: Nyet?!
Guard: [in Russian] ?? ????????? ??????? [Are you Soviet spies?]
Dr. Jackson: [in Russian] ???. [No.]
Col. O'Neill: Daniel?
Dr. Jackson: He just asked if we were Soviet spies… oh.
Jack O'Neill: Nyet?!
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Maj. Thornbird: What was the weapon you used?
Col. O'Neill: [innocently] Weapon?
Maj. Thornbird: Our cameras saw some sort of weapon.
Col. O'Neill: Oh. Well, it's hard to say.
Maj. Thornbird: Some sort of state secret?
Col. O'Neill: No, just difficult to pronounce.
Col. O'Neill: [innocently] Weapon?
Maj. Thornbird: Our cameras saw some sort of weapon.
Col. O'Neill: Oh. Well, it's hard to say.
Maj. Thornbird: Some sort of state secret?
Col. O'Neill: No, just difficult to pronounce.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
[Jack is being interrogated by a military officer in 1969.]
Maj. Thornbird: I'm Major Robert Thornberg. And you are?
Col. O'Neill: Capt. James T. Kirk, of the Starship Enterprise.
Maj. Thornbird: Your dog tags say otherwise.
Col. O'Neill: They're lying.
Maj. Thornbird: I'm Major Robert Thornberg. And you are?
Col. O'Neill: Capt. James T. Kirk, of the Starship Enterprise.
Maj. Thornbird: Your dog tags say otherwise.
Col. O'Neill: They're lying.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
[Later, in the same scene.]
Maj. Thornbird: You can either talk to me, or you can talk to the C-I-A.
Col. O'Neill: Hmmmm, Bob, can I call you Bob?
Maj. Thornbird: Even though you will achieve nothing.
Col. O'Neill: Unless that's exactly what we were trying to achieve.
Maj. Thornbird: Kirk, you can talk to me, or you can talk to the C.I.A.
Maj. Thornbird: You can either talk to me, or you can talk to the C-I-A.
Col. O'Neill: Hmmmm, Bob, can I call you Bob?
Maj. Thornbird: Even though you will achieve nothing.
Col. O'Neill: Unless that's exactly what we were trying to achieve.
Maj. Thornbird: Kirk, you can talk to me, or you can talk to the C.I.A.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Col. O'Neill: (pretending to be impressed) Ooh. All right. I'll be honest with you, Bob. My name's not Kirk. (pausing for effect) It's Skywalker. Luke Skywalker.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Col. O'Neill: Or…
Capt. Carter: I can't think of an 'or' at the moment, sir.
Dr. Jackson: No 'or'?
Col. O'Neill: There is an 'or'.
Dr. Jackson: There's an 'or'?
Capt. Carter: Sir, you can't just will something to happen because you want it to be a certain way.
Col. O'Neill: Captain, where there's a will, there's an 'or'... way.
Capt. Carter: I can't think of an 'or' at the moment, sir.
Dr. Jackson: No 'or'?
Col. O'Neill: There is an 'or'.
Dr. Jackson: There's an 'or'?
Capt. Carter: Sir, you can't just will something to happen because you want it to be a certain way.
Col. O'Neill: Captain, where there's a will, there's an 'or'... way.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Dr. Jackson: We'll go in disguise; pretend to be foreigners.
Col. O'Neill: How are you going to do that?
Dr. Jackson: Well, I speak twenty-three different languages. Pick one.
Col. O'Neill: How are you going to do that?
Dr. Jackson: Well, I speak twenty-three different languages. Pick one.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
[SG-1 has traveled back in time and Carter has been adamant they cannot reveal they are from the future.]
Hippie: I'm Michael.
Teal'c: I am not at liberty to reveal my identity.
Hippie: Far out!
Hippie: I'm Michael.
Teal'c: I am not at liberty to reveal my identity.
Hippie: Far out!
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Col. O'Neill: It's true, Michael. We came to Earth to hide among your people a long, long time ago.
Dr. Jackson: From a galaxy far, far away.
Dr. Jackson: From a galaxy far, far away.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1