Stargate SG-1 Quotes
[McKay goes to visit Carter in the infirmary, as she recovers from electrical burns]
Dr. McKay: Hi.
Maj. Carter: Oh, man, and I was just starting to feel better.
Dr. McKay: [takes a deep breath, appearing to be relaxing] I always wanted to be a pianist.
Maj. Carter: [Thinking McKay said "penis"] Excuse me?
Dr. McKay: A concert pianist --- you know, a guy who plays the piano [he mimes playing the piano] in front of lots of people?
Maj. Carter: [Sam smiles] Right.
Dr. McKay: What did you think I said?
Maj. Carter: Never mind.
Dr. McKay: I had a not-so-comfortable childhood. My parents hated each other. Blamed me. Music was my salvation. It had this ... perfect order for me.
Maj. Carter: [smiles, patronizing] That's nice, really.
Dr. McKay: When I was 12, my teacher told me to quit. A fine clinical player, he said, but no sense of the art whatsoever.
Maj. Carter: Why are you telling me this?
Dr. McKay: I'm just ... trying to bond.
Maj. Carter: Why?
Dr. McKay: Hospital gowns turn me on. [He smiles] I turned to science because I thought it would be different than music, but it isn't. It's just the same, it's just as much of an art as anything else.
Maj. Carter: Look, it's not your fault that the EM pulse didn't work.
Dr. McKay: You're an artist, Major. Maybe the best I've ever seen. I'm just critical because I'm jealous.
Maj. Carter: I'm touched, really. I wish I had a brilliant plan to draw up for you.
Dr. McKay: And you're funny, too. Even electrocuted. I mean, I've ... I've got nothing.
Maj. Carter: You're creeping me out, McKay.
Dr. McKay: Hi.
Maj. Carter: Oh, man, and I was just starting to feel better.
Dr. McKay: [takes a deep breath, appearing to be relaxing] I always wanted to be a pianist.
Maj. Carter: [Thinking McKay said "penis"] Excuse me?
Dr. McKay: A concert pianist --- you know, a guy who plays the piano [he mimes playing the piano] in front of lots of people?
Maj. Carter: [Sam smiles] Right.
Dr. McKay: What did you think I said?
Maj. Carter: Never mind.
Dr. McKay: I had a not-so-comfortable childhood. My parents hated each other. Blamed me. Music was my salvation. It had this ... perfect order for me.
Maj. Carter: [smiles, patronizing] That's nice, really.
Dr. McKay: When I was 12, my teacher told me to quit. A fine clinical player, he said, but no sense of the art whatsoever.
Maj. Carter: Why are you telling me this?
Dr. McKay: I'm just ... trying to bond.
Maj. Carter: Why?
Dr. McKay: Hospital gowns turn me on. [He smiles] I turned to science because I thought it would be different than music, but it isn't. It's just the same, it's just as much of an art as anything else.
Maj. Carter: Look, it's not your fault that the EM pulse didn't work.
Dr. McKay: You're an artist, Major. Maybe the best I've ever seen. I'm just critical because I'm jealous.
Maj. Carter: I'm touched, really. I wish I had a brilliant plan to draw up for you.
Dr. McKay: And you're funny, too. Even electrocuted. I mean, I've ... I've got nothing.
Maj. Carter: You're creeping me out, McKay.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
[McKay looks down into the gate room, where Jonas is staring at the gate]
Dr. McKay: What do you think the little alien guy's doing down there?
[Sam goes down to the gate room]
Maj. Carter: ...Jonas?
Jonas Quinn: I was just wondering...how did you get the gate in here?
Maj. Carter: Oh...well, this was originally a missile silo, so we just lowered it in from the surface with the crane.
Jonas Quinn: ...can it go up?
Dr. McKay: What do you think the little alien guy's doing down there?
[Sam goes down to the gate room]
Maj. Carter: ...Jonas?
Jonas Quinn: I was just wondering...how did you get the gate in here?
Maj. Carter: Oh...well, this was originally a missile silo, so we just lowered it in from the surface with the crane.
Jonas Quinn: ...can it go up?
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Maj. Carter: They're working on lightening the 302, but that's why you're going alone. Believe it or not, every pound counts.
Col. O'Neill: I shouldn't have had that cake.
Maj. Carter: I wish I could go with you Sir.
Col. O'Neill: Yes, I'm sure you do. [Stepping in the elevator] And I find that quite bizarre.
Col. O'Neill: I shouldn't have had that cake.
Maj. Carter: I wish I could go with you Sir.
Col. O'Neill: Yes, I'm sure you do. [Stepping in the elevator] And I find that quite bizarre.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
[Carter kisses McKay on the cheek]
Dr. McKay: [thrilled] That means you don't hate me.
Major Carter: Maybe. Too bad for you.
Dr. McKay: Why?
Major Carter: I was more attracted to you when I did.
Dr. McKay: [thrilled] That means you don't hate me.
Major Carter: Maybe. Too bad for you.
Dr. McKay: Why?
Major Carter: I was more attracted to you when I did.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
[Hammond is packing up his office. O'Neill picks up a lamp.]
Col. O'Neill: You sure you want to take this with you, sir?
Gen. Hammond: We're closed for business. I was supposed to retire five years ago. We don't know how long it's going to be before we can re-establish the Stargate Program, if ever.
Col. O'Neill: Actually, I just meant, it says "Property of US Air Force" on it.
Col. O'Neill: You sure you want to take this with you, sir?
Gen. Hammond: We're closed for business. I was supposed to retire five years ago. We don't know how long it's going to be before we can re-establish the Stargate Program, if ever.
Col. O'Neill: Actually, I just meant, it says "Property of US Air Force" on it.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Col. O'Neill: Next time we crash our brand new mothership, what do you say we do it in the tropics?
Maj. Carter: Actually, sir, it wouldn't make a difference. At this depth, all water is ice cold.
Col. O'Neill: Shallower water, then…shallower.
Maj. Carter: Yes, sir. I'll keep that in mind.
Col. O'Neill: Or we could just not crash at all. It would be nice to keep our nice new mothership more than a couple of hours.
Maj. Carter: Yes sir.
Maj. Carter: Actually, sir, it wouldn't make a difference. At this depth, all water is ice cold.
Col. O'Neill: Shallower water, then…shallower.
Maj. Carter: Yes, sir. I'll keep that in mind.
Col. O'Neill: Or we could just not crash at all. It would be nice to keep our nice new mothership more than a couple of hours.
Maj. Carter: Yes sir.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
[Col. O'Neill and Carter resurface after almost drowning]
Maj. Carter: [Speaking into her radio] Dad? We're alright.
Col. O'Neill: Tell him I take back everything I was thinking while I was underwater.
Maj. Carter: [Speaking into her radio] Dad? We're alright.
Col. O'Neill: Tell him I take back everything I was thinking while I was underwater.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
[O'Neill and Jonas have just escaped the mothership in a death glider. Jonas is smiling.]
Col. O'Neill: [suspiciously] Are you smiling?
Jonas: First time in a death glider.
Col. O'Neill: Oh! Well… [starts flying crazy]
Col. O'Neill: [suspiciously] Are you smiling?
Jonas: First time in a death glider.
Col. O'Neill: Oh! Well… [starts flying crazy]
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Jacob Carter: You know, sometimes I get a little concerned that you're gonna get my favorite planet wiped out.
Col. O'Neill: Yes. What planet is that?
Col. O'Neill: Yes. What planet is that?
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Jonas: Those of us not originally from the planet Earth...got to stick together, right?
Teal'c: Are you suggesting an alien conspiracy?
Jonas: No...oh...Of course, yes. I...I was warned about your occasional use of humor. It'...Got me!
[Teal'c stares at Jonas absolutely serious. Jonas frowns.]
Jonas: No conspiracy!
Teal'c: Are you suggesting an alien conspiracy?
Jonas: No...oh...Of course, yes. I...I was warned about your occasional use of humor. It'...Got me!
[Teal'c stares at Jonas absolutely serious. Jonas frowns.]
Jonas: No conspiracy!
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Teal'c: [into radio] The crew appears to have abandoned ship.
Gen. Hammond: That's good to hear. I don't mind telling you that we've been holding our breath down here.
Teal'c: That is most unwise.
Gen. Hammond: That's good to hear. I don't mind telling you that we've been holding our breath down here.
Teal'c: That is most unwise.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Dr. Michaels: Hi. It's nice to finally meet you, Major.
Maj. Carter: You too. Dr. Michaels, this is Dr. Fraiser.
Dr. Michaels: Doctor.
Dr. Fraiser: Doctor.
Dr. Michaels: [also introducing] Uh…Drs. Woods and Osbourne.
Dr. Fraiser: Doctor.
Dr. Woods: Doctor.
Dr. Osbourne: Major.
Maj. Carter: Doctor.
Woods: Major.
Dr. Fraiser: Doctor.
Col. O'Neill: All right. That's enough.
Maj. Carter: You too. Dr. Michaels, this is Dr. Fraiser.
Dr. Michaels: Doctor.
Dr. Fraiser: Doctor.
Dr. Michaels: [also introducing] Uh…Drs. Woods and Osbourne.
Dr. Fraiser: Doctor.
Dr. Woods: Doctor.
Dr. Osbourne: Major.
Maj. Carter: Doctor.
Woods: Major.
Dr. Fraiser: Doctor.
Col. O'Neill: All right. That's enough.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Col. O'Neill: D'oh!
Teal'c: What is it O'Neill?
Col. O'Neill: I forgot to tape The Simpsons...
[Teal'c stares at O'Neill, seemingly not understanding]
Col. O'Neill: It's important to me!
[Teal'c leaves, apparently thinking O'Neill is nuts]
Teal'c: What is it O'Neill?
Col. O'Neill: I forgot to tape The Simpsons...
[Teal'c stares at O'Neill, seemingly not understanding]
Col. O'Neill: It's important to me!
[Teal'c leaves, apparently thinking O'Neill is nuts]
TV Show: Stargate SG-1