Stargate SG-1 Quotes
[On his first journey off-world, referring to the Earth-like environment.]
Ambassador Joe Faxon: It looks just like...uh...
Col. O'Neill: Oh yeah. Just when you think you're not in Kansas anymore, turns out you are.
Ambassador Joe Faxon: It looks just like...uh...
Col. O'Neill: Oh yeah. Just when you think you're not in Kansas anymore, turns out you are.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Col. O'Neill: Hail Dorothy. The wicked witch is dead. [O'Neill receives blank stares.] It's from a movie...Margaret Hamilton...
Col. O'Neill: To Oz? It's...part of that movie...
Col. O'Neill: To Oz? It's...part of that movie...
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Vala: So…no IOA? No Reynolds’ men? No television program about dancing with supposed celebrities?
Dr. Jackson: Actually, that part was real.
Vala: [quietly] How very disturbing.
Adria: You made a terrible mistake. Release me now, and I will be merciful.
Ba'al: You're so much more pleasant when you lack the ability to snap my neck with your thoughts.
Jaffa: Stand back, I'm warning you!
Lt. Col. Mitchell: Just take it easy!
Dr. Jackson: It's okay, we're not going to hurt you.
[Vala zats the Jaffa from behind]
Dr. Jackson: Much.
Gen. Landry: Ba'al is in Adria?
Lt. Col. Mitchell: Yes, sir. It's the bad guy equivalent of Cordon Bleu.
Lt. Col. Mitchell: See, right now you're like a Pinto engine in a '71 Mustang. We're gonna swap you out for a big block Tok'ra.
Lt. Col. Mitchell: Time to go.
Ba'al: What about our arrangement?
Dr. Jackson: Oh, you mean the part where you string us along until you overcome the effects of the anti-Prior device? We'll pass.
Dr. Jackson: Actually, that part was real.
Vala: [quietly] How very disturbing.
Adria: You made a terrible mistake. Release me now, and I will be merciful.
Ba'al: You're so much more pleasant when you lack the ability to snap my neck with your thoughts.
Jaffa: Stand back, I'm warning you!
Lt. Col. Mitchell: Just take it easy!
Dr. Jackson: It's okay, we're not going to hurt you.
[Vala zats the Jaffa from behind]
Dr. Jackson: Much.
Gen. Landry: Ba'al is in Adria?
Lt. Col. Mitchell: Yes, sir. It's the bad guy equivalent of Cordon Bleu.
Lt. Col. Mitchell: See, right now you're like a Pinto engine in a '71 Mustang. We're gonna swap you out for a big block Tok'ra.
Lt. Col. Mitchell: Time to go.
Ba'al: What about our arrangement?
Dr. Jackson: Oh, you mean the part where you string us along until you overcome the effects of the anti-Prior device? We'll pass.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Dr. Jackson: I told you to bring something to amuse yourself. I didn't mean me or the crew.
Vala: They won't believe it's my birthday…again.
Dr. Jackson: Not my problem.
Vala: Being stuck on this ship is worse than being stuck at the SGC! I tell you, the last time I was this bored, I took hostages!
Dr. Jackson: I was there.
Vala: They won't believe it's my birthday…again.
Dr. Jackson: Not my problem.
Vala: Being stuck on this ship is worse than being stuck at the SGC! I tell you, the last time I was this bored, I took hostages!
Dr. Jackson: I was there.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Vala: [regarding Thor and the other Asgard] Out of curiosity, how can you tell the difference?
Dr. Jackson: The voice.
[Michael Shanks, who plays Daniel, also provides the voice of Thor]
Thor: There are many on the High Council who do not believe that we should be imparting you with such advancements.
Lt. Col. Carter: Well, we'll try not to let you down.
Thor: You are the fifth race. Your role is clear. If there is any hope for the future, it lies with you, and your people.
Lt. Col. Carter: No pressure, huh?
Lt. Col. Mitchell: I've said it before, I am for fighting to the death, but we need a plan, preferably one that avoids the 'to the death' part.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
[The Odyssey is stuck in a time-dilation field].
Lt. Col. Carter: The Asgard core has time dilation field technology built right into it. It was a quick and easy option. I'm actually gonna have to recreate some of Merlin's out-of-phase technology from scratch with what we have on-board. And it could take a while.
Dr. Jackson: Just to be sure, how long is a-a while in our time?
Lt. Col. Carter: I'm not exactly sure. But we have enough food and water for three months.
Vala: Three months?!
General Landry: We can ration supplies.
Vala: [to Dr. Jackson] I'm gonna go crazy. And I'm taking you with me.
Lt. Col. Carter: The Asgard core has time dilation field technology built right into it. It was a quick and easy option. I'm actually gonna have to recreate some of Merlin's out-of-phase technology from scratch with what we have on-board. And it could take a while.
Dr. Jackson: Just to be sure, how long is a-a while in our time?
Lt. Col. Carter: I'm not exactly sure. But we have enough food and water for three months.
Vala: Three months?!
General Landry: We can ration supplies.
Vala: [to Dr. Jackson] I'm gonna go crazy. And I'm taking you with me.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Vala: Do you think the Ori Soldiers could find a way to get through the time dilation field and over here onto the ship?
Teal'c: No.
Vala: Because I’m hearing things all the time. Are you hearing things?
Teal'c: I am trying not to.
Vala: Maybe they found a way to ring over but they can’t figure out how to secretly shut down the time dilation field so they’re trying to drive us crazy to get us to shut it down ourselves.
Teal'c: No.
Vala: That wasn’t a question.
Teal'c: No.
Teal'c: No.
Vala: Because I’m hearing things all the time. Are you hearing things?
Teal'c: I am trying not to.
Vala: Maybe they found a way to ring over but they can’t figure out how to secretly shut down the time dilation field so they’re trying to drive us crazy to get us to shut it down ourselves.
Teal'c: No.
Vala: That wasn’t a question.
Teal'c: No.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
[Vala is trying to convince Daniel to have sex with her].
Vala: We’ve been here three months. Three months!
[Pause]
Vala: You do like girls?
Dr. Jackson[emphatically]: Yes!
Vala: We’ve been here three months. Three months!
[Pause]
Vala: You do like girls?
Dr. Jackson[emphatically]: Yes!
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Dr. Jackson: I mean, all they wanted to do was live a little longer. We're no different. Sequence DNA. Cure diseases. One fatal mistake, and they doom their entire race. I guess no matter what you do, at the end of the day…life is too short.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Lt. Col. Mitchell: See what we need is, we need Superman to fly around the ship really, really fast.
Lt. Col. Carter: Oh, if you only knew how ridiculous that was.
Lt. Col. Mitchell: No, it only sounds ridiculous 'til you hear yourself say, "I am trapped on a spaceship stuck in a time dilation field."
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
[The final scene of the series]
General Landry: Dial it up, Walter.
Sgt. Harriman: Yes, sir. [starts dialing the Stargate] Chevron one encoded.
Lt. Col. Mitchell: That is how we're supposed to travel light-years across the galaxy to other planets. [points at the spinning Gate]
Sgt. Harriman: Chevron two encoded.
Lt. Col. Mitchell: [to Teal'c] You know, I'd like to imagine I handled myself well, but...I imagine I went a bit crazy cooped up on that ship for so long.
[Teal'c smiles]
Sgt. Harriman: Chevron three encoded.
Dr. Jackson: You know, Teal'c did tell me some of the things I learned from the Asgard database.
Vala: He did? Like what?
Dr. Jackson: Oh, boy. What were they?
Sgt. Harriman: Chevron four encoded.
Dr. Jackson: Beggars can't be choosers. Better late than never. Look before you leap.
Lt. Col. Mitchell: The best things in life are free.
Vala: Let me guess, beauty is only skin deep?
Dr. Jackson: Silence is golden.
Sgt. Harriman: Chevron five encoded.
Lt. Col. Mitchell: Jack of all trades, master of none.
Lt. Col. Carter: Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
Vala: Life is too short.
Sgt. Harriman: Chevron six encoded.
Teal'c: Good things come to those who wait.
Lt. Col. Carter: [to Teal'c] You know, as hard as it is for us not knowing, it must be torture for you not to tell us.
Teal'c: Indeed.
Sgt. Harriman: Chevron seven is locked.
General Landry: Good luck, SG-1.
Lt. Colonel Mitchell: Just another everyday mission to save the galaxy, sir.
SG-1: Indeed.
General Landry: Godspeed.
General Landry: Dial it up, Walter.
Sgt. Harriman: Yes, sir. [starts dialing the Stargate] Chevron one encoded.
Lt. Col. Mitchell: That is how we're supposed to travel light-years across the galaxy to other planets. [points at the spinning Gate]
Sgt. Harriman: Chevron two encoded.
Lt. Col. Mitchell: [to Teal'c] You know, I'd like to imagine I handled myself well, but...I imagine I went a bit crazy cooped up on that ship for so long.
[Teal'c smiles]
Sgt. Harriman: Chevron three encoded.
Dr. Jackson: You know, Teal'c did tell me some of the things I learned from the Asgard database.
Vala: He did? Like what?
Dr. Jackson: Oh, boy. What were they?
Sgt. Harriman: Chevron four encoded.
Dr. Jackson: Beggars can't be choosers. Better late than never. Look before you leap.
Lt. Col. Mitchell: The best things in life are free.
Vala: Let me guess, beauty is only skin deep?
Dr. Jackson: Silence is golden.
Sgt. Harriman: Chevron five encoded.
Lt. Col. Mitchell: Jack of all trades, master of none.
Lt. Col. Carter: Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
Vala: Life is too short.
Sgt. Harriman: Chevron six encoded.
Teal'c: Good things come to those who wait.
Lt. Col. Carter: [to Teal'c] You know, as hard as it is for us not knowing, it must be torture for you not to tell us.
Teal'c: Indeed.
Sgt. Harriman: Chevron seven is locked.
General Landry: Good luck, SG-1.
Lt. Colonel Mitchell: Just another everyday mission to save the galaxy, sir.
SG-1: Indeed.
General Landry: Godspeed.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Jack O'Neill, portrayed by Richard Dean Anderson, is the Tin Man
Samantha Carter, portrayed by Amanda Tapping, is Dorothy
Daniel Jackson, portrayed by Michael Shanks, is the Scarecrow.
Teal'c, portrayed by Christopher Judge, is the Lion
Samantha Carter, portrayed by Amanda Tapping, is Dorothy
Daniel Jackson, portrayed by Michael Shanks, is the Scarecrow.
Teal'c, portrayed by Christopher Judge, is the Lion
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Vala Mal Doran, portrayed by Claudia Black, as Dorothy
Daniel Jackson, portrayed by Michael Shanks as the Lion.
Cameron Mitchell, portrayed by Ben Browder as the Scarecrow.
Teal'c, portrayed by Christopher Judge, as the Tin Man
Samantha Carter, portrayed by Amanda Tapping, as Glinda the Good Witch
Gen. Landry as the Wizard
Daniel Jackson, portrayed by Michael Shanks as the Lion.
Cameron Mitchell, portrayed by Ben Browder as the Scarecrow.
Teal'c, portrayed by Christopher Judge, as the Tin Man
Samantha Carter, portrayed by Amanda Tapping, as Glinda the Good Witch
Gen. Landry as the Wizard
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Col. O'Neill: Well... We're off to see the wizard...
Col. O'Neill: To Oz...
Capt. Carter: So, any indigenous lions, tigers, or bears I should lie awake worrying about?
Col. O'Neill: To Oz...
Capt. Carter: So, any indigenous lions, tigers, or bears I should lie awake worrying about?
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Col. O'Neill: What's the bad news? 'Cause unless we've redecorated the gateroom, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Col. O'Neill: And you were there, and you were there, and there's no place like home.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Col. O'Neil: Ah, where's that yellow brick road when you need it, eh Dorothy?
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Col. O'Neill[After entering the mock-up of the gate room]: There's no place like home, sir...
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Col. Makepeace[After entering the mock-up of the gate room]: Yeah...there's no place like home...
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Dr. Jackson[Over Goa'uld radio]: Mak tal shree! Lok tak meta satak...Oz!
Goa'uld[presumably Heru-ur]: Mok tal Oz?
Dr. Jackson[Over Goa'uld radio]: Mak tal Oz, kree!
Goa'uld: Kal tek shree, tak monak!
Jacob: Alright, we're almost finished, Sam's just finishing up.
Dr. Jackson: Uh...that's good 'cause I don't think they bought my act.
Jacob: Why? Who'd you say you were?
Dr. Jackson: The uh...Great and Powerful Oz.
Jacob: SAM!
Goa'uld[presumably Heru-ur]: Mok tal Oz?
Dr. Jackson[Over Goa'uld radio]: Mak tal Oz, kree!
Goa'uld: Kal tek shree, tak monak!
Jacob: Alright, we're almost finished, Sam's just finishing up.
Dr. Jackson: Uh...that's good 'cause I don't think they bought my act.
Jacob: Why? Who'd you say you were?
Dr. Jackson: The uh...Great and Powerful Oz.
Jacob: SAM!
TV Show: Stargate SG-1
Vala[Narrating]: I was in a stolen cargo ship on my way home when a solar flare from a nearby star wreaked havoc on my navigation system, and I was forced to crash land on the nearest planet. In a bizarre twist of fate, I crashed right on top of the Goa'uld who ruled that planet [Vala timidly kicks the golden boots of the Goa'uld sticking out from under her ship]. Which was fortunate because my ship was too badly damaged to repair, and I needed help. The local villagers were very grateful [Vala walks with a crowd of Munchkins]. They introduced me to a lovely fair-haired Tok'ra who had been hiding out on the planet [Vala is shown listening to Carter, who is clearly made to look like Glenda the Good Witch, while both are tended to by Munchkins]. She told me the legend of a powerful ascended being who supposedly lived in some distant, far-off mountains, through a treacherous forest...
...I met up with a number of my friends along the way, and after a dangerous and eventful journey, we finally come face to face with the ascended being.
[Gen. Landry's massive, greenish, floating head is surrounded by smoke and flames]
Wizard Landry: What can I do for you?
Dorothy Vala: Well, at first, I thought I just wanted to go home, but now I've decided I'd quite like to be a part of something... a regular part, if you catch my drift.
Oh, and, uh, these guys have their own issues. Boys?
[Behind Vala aka Dorothy are Col. Mitchell as the Scarecrow, Dr. Jackson as the Lion, and Teal'c as the Tin-Man]
Martin Loyd[Dryly]: ...That's the Wizard of Oz.
Vala[Disappointed]: Oh. You've seen that one.
Martin: Uh, Yeah.
...I met up with a number of my friends along the way, and after a dangerous and eventful journey, we finally come face to face with the ascended being.
[Gen. Landry's massive, greenish, floating head is surrounded by smoke and flames]
Wizard Landry: What can I do for you?
Dorothy Vala: Well, at first, I thought I just wanted to go home, but now I've decided I'd quite like to be a part of something... a regular part, if you catch my drift.
Oh, and, uh, these guys have their own issues. Boys?
[Behind Vala aka Dorothy are Col. Mitchell as the Scarecrow, Dr. Jackson as the Lion, and Teal'c as the Tin-Man]
Martin Loyd[Dryly]: ...That's the Wizard of Oz.
Vala[Disappointed]: Oh. You've seen that one.
Martin: Uh, Yeah.
TV Show: Stargate SG-1