The Fairly OddParents Quotes

[Older Timmy has been eating "grown-up" food at a restaurant]
Waiter: That'll be $265.
Timmy: WHAT?! That's more than I get in allowance-- I mean, that's more than I make in a month!
Waiter: Well, you should have finished college.
Timmy: Did YOU finish? college?
Waiter: [breaking into tears] NO!!! WHY DO YOU THINK I'M A WAITER?!?!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Fairy-Gram: Fairy-Gram for Cosmo and Wanda.
Cosmo: I'm Cosmo and Wanda!
Fairy-Gram: Now that your kid is big and hairy, your next assignment is mean and scary.

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Wanda: You mean we're being reassigned?
Fairy-Gram: Ha ha ha! I mean, Yes, and we're all very sorry.
Cosmo: Can we have a couple of hours to say good-bye to Timmy?
Fairy-Gram: Can I have five dollars? Two hours.

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Cosmo: Miniature golf is a great kids' game!
[Cosmo and Wanda are turning into a tee and ball]
Timmy: Ow! My back!
Wanda: Let me try the Age-O-Meter. Kid...adult...Oh, no! You've become even more of an adult!
Cosmo: We've got to resort to the heavy artillery!
[Cuts to Timmy riding a kiddie ride outside a store]

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Vicky: This is for the TV, the VCR, the DVD, the surround sound, the combination microwave popcorn maker/neck massager, and I don't know what this plug does, but I ain't payin' for the electricity!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Timmy: I lost a life...on level 1! What am I, 4?!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Cosmo: [as Ricky] Wanda! You've got some splainin' to do!
Wanda: [as Lucy] Even though that's not the way everybody says "explaining", I respect our differences and your right to say it in the way you want.
Cosmo: Eh, babaloo?
Wanda: That, too.
Cosmo & Poof-like character: Waaaahhhhhh!
Vicky: Boring. [Changes channel]

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Wanda: [As news reporter] And now, here's Cosmo with the weather.
Cosmo: [Holding a feather] I thought you said feather. [A pause, then smiles]

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Wanda: Just let me clairify this, you married your car?
Cosmo: [In southern accent] Yep, now my kids get seventeen miles to the gallon! [Has chair thrown at him]
Wanda: We'll be right back.

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
[Timmy enters Level 8 of the video game, which looks like an underwater version of his Aunt Gertrude's house
Aunt Gertrude: (as a giant lobster with large claws) Hello, Timmy! Let Aunt Gertrude pinch those chubby cheeks of yours!
Timmy: I hope she means my face!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Timmy: I wish I had cheeks of steel!
Wanda: I hope you mean your face!
Timmy: I do!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Wanda: (as a reporter) And now here's Cosmo with the weather.
Cosmo: (holding a feather) I thought you said "feather"!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Cosmo: It's a show about nothing!...How do we know when it's over?
Vicky: (watching the show) I do. (changes the channel)

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Cosmo: Follow me to the TV! I've got an idea!
Wanda: (writing in a book) Wednesday, March 22nd: Cosmo had an idea!
[Later]
Cosmo: I'm all out of ideas!
Wanda: (writing in book) Well, easy come, easy go...
[LATER]
Cosmo: I had another idea!
Wanda: (writing in book) This was a magnificent day for Cosmo!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Vicky: Well, keep it down! You know when I'm watching you, I'm watching something on TV!!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
A.J.: It's 6: 13, Timmy always goes to the bathroom at 6: 13.
Chester: That's weird! He always struck as a 7: 43 whizzinator.

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Timmy: Those creeps! Wait 'til I reset them.
Wanda: No! If you turn off the game while they're in there, or if they lose their 3 lives, they'll disappear forever!
Timmy: Then I wish they're out of the game!
Cosmo: You can't! Quote: "I wish for a video game that's challenging - a game that you can't wish yourself out of." Unquote.
Wanda: You either win the game, or take off the helmet.
Timmy: You guys don't do anything halfway, do you?
Cosmo: Nope! We're two halves of a whole idiot.

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Cosmo: I'm a Cosmo Coin, and boy am I glad to see you!
Timmy: Ditto!
Wanda: [Running on the treadmill that keeps the power going] This'll be great for my glutes!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Timmy: I wish I had something to stop Vicky!
Cosmo: That's just vague enough to work!
[Cosmo creates a door, and Timmy's parents come in]
Mom: Vicky! It's us.
Dad: Timmy's Mom and Dad.
Mom: We're back!
Dad: You can go home now.
Vicky: (screaming and melting) Nooooo!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
[first instance of Timmy's recurring explanation for the amazing things he has as the result of his fairy godparents]
Chester: Killer Crash suit, dude!
A.J: Yeah -wherever did you get it?
Timmy: Uhh, internet?

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Wanda: We have good news and bad news.
Timmy: What's the good news?
Cosmo: The alien we got you is actually a prince from the dreaded war planet Yugopotamia.
Wanda: And his parents are on their way to destroy the Earth and rescue their son!
Timmy: What's the bad news?
Wanda: Oh, wait...that was the bad news!
Timmy: (shouting) Then what's the good news?!
Cosmo: I found a nickel!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
[While Timmy shows off the dinosaur he wished for to the class]
Mr. Crocker, Timmy's Teacher: Incredible! No normal child could have access to that kind of genetic technology. There's only one logical explanation...Fairy Godparents!!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
[At the end of a three way phone call, Timmy and Chester simply hang up]
A.J.: Doesn't anyone say "goodbye" anymore?

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Cosmo: Yippee! That hurt!
Timmy: No, Cosmo, you're supposed to say "ouch" when something hurts
Cosmo: Oh, okay. Yippee! That ouched!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Mr. Crocker: Can I offer you anything with that? Cream, sugar, magic?
Wanda: What was that last one?
Mr. Crocker: [unsure] Sugar?

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Principal Waxleplax: A week of detention for all of you! (to Timmy) You for faking your show and tell(to Chester and A.J.) You for going into the girls bathroom! (to Crocker) And you for trapping me in a toilet paper cocoon and promising two young boys they could enslave the earth! THAT'S NOT RIGHT!!!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Trixie Tang: May I grace you with my presence?
Timmy: It'll be your honor!
Trixie Tang: Oh, you're good!

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Timmy: What do those Poopular Kids have that I don't?
Cosmo: Besides the clothes and the lols and the money and the stuff?

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
[Timmy has become popular, so Chester and A.J. have to find a new friend]
Chester: Elmer, you're the new Timmy. (puts Timmy's hat on Elmer)
Elmer: Neat! Can my boil have a hat, too?

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents
Timmy: What's going on?
Wanda: You're being sued by Fairy World, and Jorgen Von Strangle is the persecutor!
Timmy: Don't you mean prosecutor?
Wanda: No!
Cosmo: I'm gonna be the defense attorney!
Timmy & Wanda: NO!!!
(Cosmo turns into a defense attorney)
Cosmo: And, for my first legal maneuver, I'd like to make a motion! (starts dancing)

TV Show: The Fairly OddParents