The Practice Quotes
Jimmy Berluti: I've spent my whole life thinking I'm not good enough.
Bobby Donnell: If we lose, you'll at least know your whole life, you've been right.
Bobby Donnell: If we lose, you'll at least know your whole life, you've been right.
TV Show: The Practice
Lindsay: Hail, hail freedom of the press. I think it's time to send a message to all the cockroaches.
TV Show: The Practice
Lindsay: If you were in my position...
Helen: I would NEVER be in your position.
Lindsay: Hey!
Helen: Go to hell.
Lindsay: You go to hell.
Helen: I would NEVER be in your position.
Lindsay: Hey!
Helen: Go to hell.
Lindsay: You go to hell.
TV Show: The Practice
[part of her closing argument]
Helen: This man comes from a society that treats women as commodities. A nation that burns bad wives. In America we don't do that. We don't condone honor killings. We don't consider any murder to be honorable. You all know what he did. Come back with a verdict which reminds him what country he is in now.
Helen: This man comes from a society that treats women as commodities. A nation that burns bad wives. In America we don't do that. We don't condone honor killings. We don't consider any murder to be honorable. You all know what he did. Come back with a verdict which reminds him what country he is in now.
TV Show: The Practice
[the Big Bad Wolf gets caught in the Practical Pig's lie detector machine]
Practical Pig: Where are my brothers?
Big Bad Wolf: Your brothers? Never heard of 'em! [the lie detector detects a lie and washes the wolf's mouth with soap and water]
Practical Pig: Where are my brothers?
Big Bad Wolf: I ain't seen 'em! [the lie detector detects another lie and spanks the wolf on the rear]
Practical Pig: WHERE ARE MY BROTHERS?
Big Bad Wolf: I ain't... [He stops and looks at the lie detector, then turns back to Practical and speaks in a calmer voice]
Big Bad Wolf: Now listen, buddy, you got me wrong. Why, I'm your pal. [the detector detects still another lie and proceeds to punish the wolf more]
Practical Pig: Where are my brothers?
Big Bad Wolf: Your brothers? Never heard of 'em! [the lie detector detects a lie and washes the wolf's mouth with soap and water]
Practical Pig: Where are my brothers?
Big Bad Wolf: I ain't seen 'em! [the lie detector detects another lie and spanks the wolf on the rear]
Practical Pig: WHERE ARE MY BROTHERS?
Big Bad Wolf: I ain't... [He stops and looks at the lie detector, then turns back to Practical and speaks in a calmer voice]
Big Bad Wolf: Now listen, buddy, you got me wrong. Why, I'm your pal. [the detector detects still another lie and proceeds to punish the wolf more]
TV Show: The Practice
Bobby Donnell: You think it's tough defending the guilty, Lindsay? Try the innocent... it's terrifying.
TV Show: The Practice
[Girls are all on their desks since there's a rat running around in the office. Ellenor takes out a pistol from her drawer.]
Rebecca: You have a gun?
Ellenor: It's just a starter pistol.
Lindsay: What are you gonna do, race him?
Rebecca: You have a gun?
Ellenor: It's just a starter pistol.
Lindsay: What are you gonna do, race him?
TV Show: The Practice
[Helen is called in to question the son of a well-known police detective, when he is accused of murder. When she uses his father to get a confession, Bobby tries to have it thrown out because it was made to a police officer, even if he was the suspect's father. Meanwhile, Eleanor represents a slightly retarded young man accused of murder, and suspects a surprise witness who suddenly comes to his defense might be lying.]
Richard Bay: "There are heroes in this world. They’re called district attorneys. They don’t get to have clients – people who smile at them at the end of the trial; who look them in the eye and say thank you. Nobody’s there to appreciate the district attorney because we work for the state. And our gratitude comes only from knowing there’s a tide out there. A tide the size of a tsunami coming out of a bottomless cesspool. A tide called crime which if left unchecked will rob every American of his freedom. A tide which strips individuals of the privilege of being able to walk down a dark street or to take $20 out of an ATM machine without fear of being mugged. All Congress does is talk. It’s the district attorney who grabs his sword, who digs into the trenches and fights the fight; who dogs justice day after day after day without thanks; without so much as a simple pat on the back. But we do it. We do it. We do it because we are the crusaders. The last frontier of American justice. Knowing that if a man cannot feel safe, he can never, never, feel free."
Richard Bay: "There are heroes in this world. They’re called district attorneys. They don’t get to have clients – people who smile at them at the end of the trial; who look them in the eye and say thank you. Nobody’s there to appreciate the district attorney because we work for the state. And our gratitude comes only from knowing there’s a tide out there. A tide the size of a tsunami coming out of a bottomless cesspool. A tide called crime which if left unchecked will rob every American of his freedom. A tide which strips individuals of the privilege of being able to walk down a dark street or to take $20 out of an ATM machine without fear of being mugged. All Congress does is talk. It’s the district attorney who grabs his sword, who digs into the trenches and fights the fight; who dogs justice day after day after day without thanks; without so much as a simple pat on the back. But we do it. We do it. We do it because we are the crusaders. The last frontier of American justice. Knowing that if a man cannot feel safe, he can never, never, feel free."
TV Show: The Practice
Bobby: Here we go!
Lindsay: Don’t “here we go” me! If you “here we go” me one more time I am going to scream, okay? Do you hear me?
Bobby: Listen to yourself!
Lindsay: Ooh, and I hate that one too. Listen to yourself. “Here we go” and “Listen to yourself”. If you ever say those in our marriage, I will scream!! Okay? It’s good to know these things before we become husband and wife. You know, this is very, very healthy!
[Lindsay storms out.]
Lucy: [to Bobby, smiling]Well. It’s nice to know you can make her scream.
Lindsay: Don’t “here we go” me! If you “here we go” me one more time I am going to scream, okay? Do you hear me?
Bobby: Listen to yourself!
Lindsay: Ooh, and I hate that one too. Listen to yourself. “Here we go” and “Listen to yourself”. If you ever say those in our marriage, I will scream!! Okay? It’s good to know these things before we become husband and wife. You know, this is very, very healthy!
[Lindsay storms out.]
Lucy: [to Bobby, smiling]Well. It’s nice to know you can make her scream.
TV Show: The Practice
[Bobby and Lindsay are getting their marriage license.]
Clerk: [to Lindsay]Oh, your initials are LSD. Isn’t that funny?
Clerk: [to Lindsay]Oh, your initials are LSD. Isn’t that funny?
TV Show: The Practice
Bobby: Lindsay, I’ve only had two dreams my whole life. One was to pitch for the Red Sox, the other was to meet and marry the most wonderful woman in the whole world. One for two isn’t bad. Now, if I could just get you to take a little medication for your mood swings... [touches her face]
Lindsay: Is that so? [bends his finger backwards]
Bobby: Ow, ow, oh, okay, okay. Uncle!
Lindsay: Is that so? [bends his finger backwards]
Bobby: Ow, ow, oh, okay, okay. Uncle!
TV Show: The Practice
[accused of plotting his wife's death]
Client: I guess you can't ask someone to trust you after you've planned their death.
Client: I guess you can't ask someone to trust you after you've planned their death.
TV Show: The Practice
[after Jimmy has burst into his apartment with the police only to find Judge Kittleson standing there naked]
Jimmy Berluti: What?
Judge Roberta Kittleson: I came to surprise you.
Jimmy Berluti: Oh... it worked.
Jimmy Berluti: What?
Judge Roberta Kittleson: I came to surprise you.
Jimmy Berluti: Oh... it worked.
TV Show: The Practice
[Bobby and Lindsay are getting their marraige license. When reviewing their information, the lady helping them makes a crack about 'Lindsay Suzanne Dole']
Lady: [to Lindsay] Your initials are LSD - isn't that funny?
Lady: [to Lindsay] Your initials are LSD - isn't that funny?
TV Show: The Practice
[Lindsay is emotionally involved in a case, and is acting moody at the office. Earlier, Lucy overheard her confess to Bobby that she "needs more sex"]
Jimmy Berluti: [to Bobby] Is there something I'm not getting here?
Lucy: It's Lindsay who's not gettin' it - from Bobby.
Bobby: LUCY!
Jimmy Berluti: [to Bobby] Is there something I'm not getting here?
Lucy: It's Lindsay who's not gettin' it - from Bobby.
Bobby: LUCY!
TV Show: The Practice
[On fixing Eugene's non-existent hair]
Lucy: I'm not a magician.
Eugene: No, but you can make yourself disappear.
Lucy: I'm not a magician.
Eugene: No, but you can make yourself disappear.
TV Show: The Practice
[on George's innocence]
Susan Robin's father: You're getting paid to think that.
Eugene: I get paid to represent him. What I think isn't up for sale.
Susan Robin's father: You're getting paid to think that.
Eugene: I get paid to represent him. What I think isn't up for sale.
TV Show: The Practice
[part of her closing argument]
Helen: This man comes from a society that treats women as commodities. A nation that burns bad wives. In America we don't do that. We don't condone honor killings. We don't consider any murder to be honorable. You all know what he did. Come back with a verdict which reminds him what country he is in now.
Helen: This man comes from a society that treats women as commodities. A nation that burns bad wives. In America we don't do that. We don't condone honor killings. We don't consider any murder to be honorable. You all know what he did. Come back with a verdict which reminds him what country he is in now.
TV Show: The Practice
[There is a rat in the office and the girls have piled on top of the desks in order to get away from it. Ellenor pulls out something and Lindsay asks her what it is]
Ellenor: It's a starter pistol.
Lindsay: [laughing] What are you gonna do? Race him?
Ellenor: It's a starter pistol.
Lindsay: [laughing] What are you gonna do? Race him?
TV Show: The Practice
[to Lindsay]
Helen: If you're in love with the guy, be a woman about it and claw my eyes out. I'd do it to you.
Helen: If you're in love with the guy, be a woman about it and claw my eyes out. I'd do it to you.
TV Show: The Practice
Helen Gamble: I need it, Richard. Give it to me.
Richard Bay: What?
Helen Gamble: The speech. Why we do what we do.
Richard Bay: Oh, I am not really in the mood after...
Helen Gamble: PLEASE, Richard. I NEED it. Please give it to me. And don't just phone it in.
Richard Bay: Helen...
Helen Gamble: Please! Can't you see how demoralized I am?
Richard Bay: OK. (takes a deep breath) There are heroes in this world. They're called District Attorneys. They don't get to have clients, people who smile at them at the end of the trial, who look them in the eye and say, "thank you." Nobody is there to appreciate the District Attorney, because we work for the state. And our gratitude comes only from knowing there's a tide out there. A tide the size of a tsunami coming out of a bottomless cesspool. A tide called crime, which, if left unchecked will rob every American of his freedom. A tide which strips individuals of the privilege of being able to, to walk down a dark street or take twenty dollars out of an ATM machine without fear of being mugged. All Congress does is talk, but it's the District Attorney who grabs his sword, who digs into the trenches and fights the fight. Who dogs justice day, after day, after day without thanks, without so much as a simple pat on the back. But we do it. We do it, we do it because we are the crusaders, the last frontier of American justice. Knowing that if a man cannot feel safe, he can never, never feel free.
Helen Gamble: Thank you.
TV Show: The Practice
Helen: [to Ellenor] Roommates are supposed to share their little sexual secrets. I sleep with this football player, he comes over with his poodle. Dog likes to lick my toes during. . . Just kidding.
TV Show: The Practice
Helen: We'd all kill. It's just the circumstances that vary.
Lindsay: Now there's a proverb.
TV Show: The Practice
Helen: Who's the judge?
Richard: Kittleson, I hate her too.
Helen: And why is that?
Richard: Because... Raymond Oz called me a midget at sidebar. She could've held him in contempt.
Helen: He was the defendant! She...
Richard: Then she half-called me a midget, too.
Helen: Kittleson?
Richard: It was a slip. She said 'midg', then caught herself. I hate her too.
TV Show: The Practice
Judge Zoey Hiller: Mr. Bay, did you see the sign, "Check your soapbox at the door"?
TV Show: The Practice
Bobby Donnell: [about Ellenor testifying on behalf of the firm] We'll look bad if we hide things. Let's just be upfront about everything.
Ellenor: That's easy for you to say - it's not your personal life
Lucy: Who has a personal life?
Bobby Donnell, Ellenor: [shout] Lucy!
TV Show: The Practice