The Young Ones Quote
Mike: [to the guard] Evening, officer. University Challenge, Scumbag College.
Guard: Yeah, hang on, hang on... [checks his clipboard] You were supposed to be here two weeks ago.
Neil: Well, we had to walk the last 200 miles.
Mike: Didn't you get our message? Neil, why didn't you phone our message?
Guard: [checking his clipboard] We did get a message, yes... "Beep beep beep, oh no heavy, the coins keep coming out, beep beep beep, even the telephone hates me, beep beep beep, I wish there were no machines, and everyone led a pastoral existence, trees and flowers don't deliberately cool you out and go beep in your ear."
Neil: Yeah, that's the message, didn't you get it?
Guard: Yeah, that was on the twenty-fourth. [Vyvyan attempts to enter the studio with a pig] 'Ere, hang on! What's that?
Vyvyan: It's my mascot!
Guard: A pig?
Vyvyan: No!
Guard: It is.
Vyvyan: It's not, it's a ferret. It's a deformed ferret, I'll grant you that. So severely deformed in fact that it looks a little bit like a pig.
Guard: Looks exactly like a pig.
Vyvyan: Yes, well, it certainly has been remarked upon. In fact, just as John Hurt is known as The Elephant Man, Bacon Sandwich here is known as the Pig Ferret.
Guard: Bacon Sandwich? Funny name for a ferret, isn't it?
Vyvyan: Aha! And that's where I had you fooled because it's not a ferret, it's a pig.
Mike: Well done, Vyv, you've certainly got him there.
Rick: Have you had enough, Nazi, or do you want some more? [gives guard the 2-finger salute]
Pig: [in thought balloon] That's nothing, someone called me a policeman the other day.
[Bambi enters]
Guard: Good morning, Mr. Gascoigne, sir.
Bambi
Guard: Yeah, hang on, hang on... [checks his clipboard] You were supposed to be here two weeks ago.
Neil: Well, we had to walk the last 200 miles.
Mike: Didn't you get our message? Neil, why didn't you phone our message?
Guard: [checking his clipboard] We did get a message, yes... "Beep beep beep, oh no heavy, the coins keep coming out, beep beep beep, even the telephone hates me, beep beep beep, I wish there were no machines, and everyone led a pastoral existence, trees and flowers don't deliberately cool you out and go beep in your ear."
Neil: Yeah, that's the message, didn't you get it?
Guard: Yeah, that was on the twenty-fourth. [Vyvyan attempts to enter the studio with a pig] 'Ere, hang on! What's that?
Vyvyan: It's my mascot!
Guard: A pig?
Vyvyan: No!
Guard: It is.
Vyvyan: It's not, it's a ferret. It's a deformed ferret, I'll grant you that. So severely deformed in fact that it looks a little bit like a pig.
Guard: Looks exactly like a pig.
Vyvyan: Yes, well, it certainly has been remarked upon. In fact, just as John Hurt is known as The Elephant Man, Bacon Sandwich here is known as the Pig Ferret.
Guard: Bacon Sandwich? Funny name for a ferret, isn't it?
Vyvyan: Aha! And that's where I had you fooled because it's not a ferret, it's a pig.
Mike: Well done, Vyv, you've certainly got him there.
Rick: Have you had enough, Nazi, or do you want some more? [gives guard the 2-finger salute]
Pig: [in thought balloon] That's nothing, someone called me a policeman the other day.
[Bambi enters]
Guard: Good morning, Mr. Gascoigne, sir.
Bambi
TV Show: The Young Ones
