Whose Line Is It Anyway? Quotes
I hate to tell the story cause myself it might embarrass
But the other night, I went out with the daughter of Chuck Barris
When we had to make love, she did something that's wrong
I took off my pants, and she gave me the gong
But the other night, I went out with the daughter of Chuck Barris
When we had to make love, she did something that's wrong
I took off my pants, and she gave me the gong
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Don't like talking about my family
No sirree bob, that's not the subject for me
Let me ask you a question, tell you, Jack
Am I adopted cause the rest of my family's black
No sirree bob, that's not the subject for me
Let me ask you a question, tell you, Jack
Am I adopted cause the rest of my family's black
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Well, my first job was in fast food, don't you know
The hours were real long and the payment was real low
My boss told me that he didn't like my sass
So my first kiss was a hearty "Kiss my ass!"
The hours were real long and the payment was real low
My boss told me that he didn't like my sass
So my first kiss was a hearty "Kiss my ass!"
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Well, my wife left me, she ran out the door
She took all the furniture, she cleared me to the floor
When I asked her why, she said I smell like no other
Ssaid I smelled as bad as an episode of "Big Brother"
She took all the furniture, she cleared me to the floor
When I asked her why, she said I smell like no other
Ssaid I smelled as bad as an episode of "Big Brother"
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Ryan: What was in that mug Drew.
Drew: Depends on who wants to pay me. Could be RC, coulb be 7-up I don't know. Taste great though!
Drew: Depends on who wants to pay me. Could be RC, coulb be 7-up I don't know. Taste great though!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Greg: [wearing a rabbit mask, muffled] I never use protection. [no audience response]
Drew: Say that again? I don't think anybody could hear you.
Greg: [takes mask off] Oh, could nobody hear me?
Drew: No.
Greg: Maybe it's because of this fucking mask I'm wearing.
Drew: Say that again? I don't think anybody could hear you.
Greg: [takes mask off] Oh, could nobody hear me?
Drew: No.
Greg: Maybe it's because of this fucking mask I'm wearing.
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Greg: (wearing some butterfly wings) Well now I'm out of the caterpillar stage (minimal audience reaction)
Drew: (Buzz) Screech! Screech.
Greg: You put the fucking wings on!
Drew: (Buzz) Screech! Screech.
Greg: You put the fucking wings on!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Drew: What President Bush does in his office when he is all by himself.
Greg: [pretends to do hopscotch but screws up at one point] Oh, darn it!
[Later]
Greg: [changes voice] Hello, is this Hillary Clinton? Is your water running?
Greg: [pretends to do hopscotch but screws up at one point] Oh, darn it!
[Later]
Greg: [changes voice] Hello, is this Hillary Clinton? Is your water running?
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Greg: [Mimes looking into a handheld mirror] Who beat Al Gore? Who beat Al Gore?
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Drew: State mottos rejected from license plates.
Greg: Mississippi! We do too have all our teeth!
Greg: Mississippi! We do too have all our teeth!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Greg: Texas! Capital punishment ROCKS!
Drew: Ya got that right, bubba.
Drew: Ya got that right, bubba.
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Drew: Things you shouldn't do at the last minute.
Greg: (comes out with Wayne) And have a good first day at school. Daddy's gay.
Greg: (comes out with Wayne) And have a good first day at school. Daddy's gay.
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Drew: Things you can say about the food you eat, but not your girlfriend.
Greg: Breast, breast, breast. I'm sick of breast. Where are the thighs?
Greg: Breast, breast, breast. I'm sick of breast. Where are the thighs?
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Drew: The good news and the bad news.
Greg: [comes out with Wayne and hands him a present] Merry Christmas Tommy. [Wayne opens it] Look. It's Geppetto on DVD. [buzzes]
Wayne: [laughing] I liked it!
Greg: The bad news is that it was Christmas.
Greg: [comes out with Wayne and hands him a present] Merry Christmas Tommy. [Wayne opens it] Look. It's Geppetto on DVD. [buzzes]
Wayne: [laughing] I liked it!
Greg: The bad news is that it was Christmas.
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Drew: Pull the string on the Drew Carey doll and it says...
Greg: [evil look at Drew]
Drew: Go ahead, do what ever you want baby.
Greg: [pulls string] Mimi and I are the same person.
Greg: [evil look at Drew]
Drew: Go ahead, do what ever you want baby.
Greg: [pulls string] Mimi and I are the same person.
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Drew: Things you can say about your truck, but not your girlfriend.
Greg: Wow! You can fit four in there!
Greg: Wow! You can fit four in there!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Drew: A brief glimpse into the dreams of Colin Mochrie.
(Greg pretend to be Colin that has hair and starts playing with it and then walks back to his place like a dinosaur)
(Greg pretend to be Colin that has hair and starts playing with it and then walks back to his place like a dinosaur)
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Greg, Ryan, and Wayne: [pulling back their hair to look like they're bald] AaAaAaAaAHH!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Greg: [Came out again]Yeah, you were great, Sharon Stone. No, I'm not gonna call you.
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Drew: Things you can say to your boat, but not your girlfriend.
Greg: Yeah, you could put a dozen guys down below.
Greg: Yeah, you could put a dozen guys down below.
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Drew: If department store mannequins could talk.
[Greg is pointing with Wayne]
Greg: What the hell are we pointing at?
[Greg is pointing with Wayne]
Greg: What the hell are we pointing at?
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Drew: What's really going through George W. Bush's mind during cabinet meetings.
Greg: Hmm. What does the "W" stand for? Whatever!
Greg: Hmm. What does the "W" stand for? Whatever!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Drew: Welcome signs when entering U.S. states
Greg: Welcome to Ohio, Watch out for Drew-pmft! (assuming that he hit or ran over Drew)
Greg: Welcome to Ohio, Watch out for Drew-pmft! (assuming that he hit or ran over Drew)
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Drew: If Welcome signs in European countries were truthful
Greg: Entering France... Roll up windows.
Greg: Entering France... Roll up windows.
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Drew: What God created on his day off.
Greg: And they shall be known as the Dodgers. [Audience cheers]
Greg: And they shall be known as the Dodgers. [Audience cheers]
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?