Andy Richter Controls the Universe Quote
[Teak and Phil are fighting over Jessica]
Jessica: [answering the phone] This is Jessica.
Phil: [impersonating Teak] Jessica, this is Teak. I just called to tell you I'm a total jerk and you should definitely go out with Phil, because he's your kind of man. And strong.
Teak: [Teak comes in on a third line] Phil, you bastard. Jessica, it's me, Teak. [impersonating Phil]
Teak: No wait, it's Phil. And you're fat. [normal]
Teak: Did you hear that? Phil just called you fat.
Jessica: [impersonating Phil] Wait, I'm Phil.
Teak: What?
Phil: Huh?
Jessica: [impersonating Teak] Hello, this is Teak!
Phil: What?
Teak: Who is this?
Jessica: [impersonating Phil] Phil. I think someone else is on the line.
Phil: What?
Jessica: [impersonating Teak] What?
Teak: Are you Teak or Phil?
Jessica: [scary voice] I'm in the house! [impersonating Phil]
Jessica: Dude, run! Hang up! Run! [both Teak and Phil hang up and run away frightened]
Jessica: [answering the phone] This is Jessica.
Phil: [impersonating Teak] Jessica, this is Teak. I just called to tell you I'm a total jerk and you should definitely go out with Phil, because he's your kind of man. And strong.
Teak: [Teak comes in on a third line] Phil, you bastard. Jessica, it's me, Teak. [impersonating Phil]
Teak: No wait, it's Phil. And you're fat. [normal]
Teak: Did you hear that? Phil just called you fat.
Jessica: [impersonating Phil] Wait, I'm Phil.
Teak: What?
Phil: Huh?
Jessica: [impersonating Teak] Hello, this is Teak!
Phil: What?
Teak: Who is this?
Jessica: [impersonating Phil] Phil. I think someone else is on the line.
Phil: What?
Jessica: [impersonating Teak] What?
Teak: Are you Teak or Phil?
Jessica: [scary voice] I'm in the house! [impersonating Phil]
Jessica: Dude, run! Hang up! Run! [both Teak and Phil hang up and run away frightened]
TV Show: Andy Richter Controls the Universe
