Argo Quotes
LA Times Reporter: What does the title refer to?
Lester Siegel: The Argo. You know, it's the thing.
LA Times Reporter: Like Jason and the Golden Fleece, or what?
Lester Siegel: No, no. It's the ship. It's the spaceship. It goes everywhere. It goes all throughout space.
LA Times Reporter: So, it's Argonaut.
Lester Siegel: No.
LA Times Reporter: What does Argo mean?
Lester Siegel: I don't know.
LA Times Reporter: You don't know?
Lester Siegel: It means Argo fuck yourself.
Lester Siegel: The Argo. You know, it's the thing.
LA Times Reporter: Like Jason and the Golden Fleece, or what?
Lester Siegel: No, no. It's the ship. It's the spaceship. It goes everywhere. It goes all throughout space.
LA Times Reporter: So, it's Argonaut.
Lester Siegel: No.
LA Times Reporter: What does Argo mean?
Lester Siegel: I don't know.
LA Times Reporter: You don't know?
Lester Siegel: It means Argo fuck yourself.
Movie: Argo
John Chambers: Target audience will hate it.
Tony Mendez: Who's the target audience?
John Chambers: People with eyes.
Tony Mendez: Who's the target audience?
John Chambers: People with eyes.
Movie: Argo
Max Klein: You want me to be honest with you, Les?
Lester Siegel: No, I would like you to bullshit me, Max.
Lester Siegel: No, I would like you to bullshit me, Max.
Movie: Argo
Joe Stafford: You really believe your little story's gonna make a difference when there's a gun to our heads?
Tony Mendez: I think my story's the only thing between you and a gun to your head.
Tony Mendez: I think my story's the only thing between you and a gun to your head.
Movie: Argo
Lester Siegel: Okay, you got 6 people hiding out in a town of what, 4 million people, all of whom chant death to America all the livelong day. You want to set up a movie in a week. You want to lie to Hollywood, a town where everybody lies for a living. Then you're gonna sneak 007 over here into a country that wants CIA blood on their breakfast cereal, and you're gonna walk the Brady Bunch out of the most watched city in the world.
Tony Mendez: Past about a hundred militia at the airport. That's right.
Lester Siegel: Right. Look, I gotta tell you. We did suicide missions in the army that had better odds than this.
Tony Mendez: Past about a hundred militia at the airport. That's right.
Lester Siegel: Right. Look, I gotta tell you. We did suicide missions in the army that had better odds than this.
Movie: Argo
Jack O'Donnell: Brace yourself; it's like talking to those two old fucks on The Muppets.
Movie: Argo
Lester Siegel ,
Tony Mendez: [on the phone]So I'm sitting in Jerry's this morning, having breakfast, a waitress comes over to me, she's waving a newspaper and she says, 'You see what those Canadians pulled off? Why can't we do something like that?' And I said to her, you know what I said?
Tony Mendez: No, what?
Lester Siegel: 'Argo fuck yourself!'
Tony Mendez: [on the phone]So I'm sitting in Jerry's this morning, having breakfast, a waitress comes over to me, she's waving a newspaper and she says, 'You see what those Canadians pulled off? Why can't we do something like that?' And I said to her, you know what I said?
Tony Mendez: No, what?
Lester Siegel: 'Argo fuck yourself!'
Movie: Argo
Tony Mendez: You really know Warren Beatty?
Lester Siegel: Yes, I do. I took a leak next to him once at the Golden Globes.
Lester Siegel: Yes, I do. I took a leak next to him once at the Golden Globes.
Movie: Argo
Max Klein: You want me to be honest with you, Les?
Lester Siegel: No, I would like you to bullshit me, Max.
Max Klein: All right. I enjoyed your films, the early ones. I took this meeting out of respect, because I wanted to say no to your face.
Lester Siegel: Thank you. Very respectful.
Max Klein: You're finished, Lester. Get your cataracts fixed, read the trades. MGM just capitalized for six new films, they're screaming for sci-fi! They're offering me four times what you guys are offering me.
Lester Siegel: Well, what can I say? Congratulations. But see, if kind of worries me what you said, let me tell you why. A couple of weeks ago I was sitting in Trader Vic's, I was enjoying a mai tai, when my pal Warren Beatty comes in. He wishes me well, and we have a little chat. Seems he was attached to star in 'Zulu Empire,' which was gonna anchor that MGM slate, but Warren confided in me that the picture's gone over budget because the Zulu extras want to unionize. They may be cannibals, but they want health and dental. Which means the movie's kaput, so the MGM deal ain't gonna happen, and your script ain't worth the buffalo shit on a nickel. So the way it looks to me, through the cataracts I grant you, is that you can either sign here and take ten thousand dollars for your toilet paper script, or you can go fuck yourself! With all due respect.
Lester Siegel: No, I would like you to bullshit me, Max.
Max Klein: All right. I enjoyed your films, the early ones. I took this meeting out of respect, because I wanted to say no to your face.
Lester Siegel: Thank you. Very respectful.
Max Klein: You're finished, Lester. Get your cataracts fixed, read the trades. MGM just capitalized for six new films, they're screaming for sci-fi! They're offering me four times what you guys are offering me.
Lester Siegel: Well, what can I say? Congratulations. But see, if kind of worries me what you said, let me tell you why. A couple of weeks ago I was sitting in Trader Vic's, I was enjoying a mai tai, when my pal Warren Beatty comes in. He wishes me well, and we have a little chat. Seems he was attached to star in 'Zulu Empire,' which was gonna anchor that MGM slate, but Warren confided in me that the picture's gone over budget because the Zulu extras want to unionize. They may be cannibals, but they want health and dental. Which means the movie's kaput, so the MGM deal ain't gonna happen, and your script ain't worth the buffalo shit on a nickel. So the way it looks to me, through the cataracts I grant you, is that you can either sign here and take ten thousand dollars for your toilet paper script, or you can go fuck yourself! With all due respect.
Movie: Argo
Jack O'Donnell: I am not going to leave him at the airport with six people and his dick in his hand. Tell the Director to call the White House. Do your fucking job!
Movie: Argo
First A.D.: He says the Minotaur prosthetic is too tight, so he can't act.
John Chambers: If he could act, he wouldn't be playing the Minotaur.
John Chambers: If he could act, he wouldn't be playing the Minotaur.
Movie: Argo
John Chambers: [after hearing of the plan to get the hostages out]So you want to come to Hollywood, act like a big shot...
Tony Mendez: Yeah.
John Chambers: ...without actually doing anything?
Tony Mendez: No.
John Chambers: [smiles]You'll fit right in!
Tony Mendez: Yeah.
John Chambers: ...without actually doing anything?
Tony Mendez: No.
John Chambers: [smiles]You'll fit right in!
Movie: Argo
Jack O'Donnell: Carter said you were a great American.
Tony Mendez: A great American what?
Jack O'Donnell: He didn't say.
Tony Mendez: A great American what?
Jack O'Donnell: He didn't say.
Movie: Argo
John Chambers: If you're gonna do a $20 million Star Wars rip-off, you need somebody who's a somebody to put their name on it. Somebody respectable. With credits. Who you can trust with classified information. Who'll produce a fake movie. For free.
Movie: Argo
Tony Mendez: We've got an office, we've got business cards, we've got a poster. If I'm the Revolutionary Guard, that's nothing we couldn't have made at home. Six people's lives depend on this. It's not enough. If we're gonna fool these people, it has to be big. And it has to have something that says it's authentic.
John Chambers: I did a movie with Rock Hudson one time. If you wanna sell a lie...
Lester Siegel: You get the press to sell it for you.
John Chambers: I did a movie with Rock Hudson one time. If you wanna sell a lie...
Lester Siegel: You get the press to sell it for you.
Movie: Argo
Nina: Lester?
Lester Siegel: Nina, you look fabulous. You're doing the reading?
Nina: I'm playing Serksi, the Galactic Witch.
Lester Siegel: Great. I'll call you. [walking away from Nina, talks to John]
Lester Siegel: Keep that fucking space witch away from me.
John Chambers: You know her?
Lester Siegel: I was married to her.
Lester Siegel: Nina, you look fabulous. You're doing the reading?
Nina: I'm playing Serksi, the Galactic Witch.
Lester Siegel: Great. I'll call you. [walking away from Nina, talks to John]
Lester Siegel: Keep that fucking space witch away from me.
John Chambers: You know her?
Lester Siegel: I was married to her.
Movie: Argo
Jack O'Donnell: If we wanted applause, we would have joined the circus.
Tony Mendez: I thought we did.
Tony Mendez: I thought we did.
Movie: Argo
Tony Mendez: Sir, exfils are like abortions. You don't wanna need one. But when you do, you don't do it yourself.
Movie: Argo
Tony Mendez: This is what I do. I get people out. And I've never left anyone behind.
Joe Stafford: I wish I could believe you, Mr. Harkins.
Tony Mendez: My name is Tony Mendez. I'm from New York. My father worked construction. My mother teaches elementary school. I have a wife and a ten year old son. You play along with me today and I promise you, I will get you out tomorrow.
Joe Stafford: I wish I could believe you, Mr. Harkins.
Tony Mendez: My name is Tony Mendez. I'm from New York. My father worked construction. My mother teaches elementary school. I have a wife and a ten year old son. You play along with me today and I promise you, I will get you out tomorrow.
Movie: Argo
Tony Mendez: Mike, if I were to say you were looking through the wrong end of that viewfinder, would I be right? [Lee casually turns the viewfinder around]
Lee Schatz: Yup.
Lee Schatz: Yup.
Movie: Argo
Lester Siegel: We made history today. History starts out as farce and ends up as tragedy.
John Chambers: Quote's the other way around.
Lester Siegel: Yeah? Who said it?
John Chambers: Marx.
Lester Siegel: Groucho said that?
John Chambers: Quote's the other way around.
Lester Siegel: Yeah? Who said it?
John Chambers: Marx.
Lester Siegel: Groucho said that?
Movie: Argo
Landon Butler: They're claiming the embassy was a den of espionage.
Hamilton Jordan: We wish it was a fuckin' den of espionage. CI's got three people over there, they don't see a revolution coming? Call it something other than intelligence.
Hamilton Jordan: We wish it was a fuckin' den of espionage. CI's got three people over there, they don't see a revolution coming? Call it something other than intelligence.
Movie: Argo
Tony Mendez: [Reading a script]Fade in on a starship landing. An exotic, Middle Eastern vibe. Women gather, offering ecstatic libations to the sky gods. Argo. A science-fantasy adventure.
Lester Siegel: [reluctant]It's in turnaround. It's dog shit.
Tony Mendez: It's a space movie in the Middle East. Does it matter?
John Chambers: [to Lester]Can we get the option?
Tony Mendez: [confused]Why do we need the option?
Lester Siegel: You're worried about the Ayatollah? Try the WGA.
Lester Siegel: [reluctant]It's in turnaround. It's dog shit.
Tony Mendez: It's a space movie in the Middle East. Does it matter?
John Chambers: [to Lester]Can we get the option?
Tony Mendez: [confused]Why do we need the option?
Lester Siegel: You're worried about the Ayatollah? Try the WGA.
Movie: Argo
Tony Mendez: You got any kids, Lester?
Lester Siegel: Yeah, I have two daughters.
Tony Mendez: You see them much?
Lester Siegel: I talk to them once a year, maybe.
Tony Mendez: Why's that?
Lester Siegel: [shrugs]I was a terrible father. [pause]
Lester Siegel: The bullshit business, it's like coal-mining - you come home to your wife and kids, you can't wash it off.
Lester Siegel: Yeah, I have two daughters.
Tony Mendez: You see them much?
Lester Siegel: I talk to them once a year, maybe.
Tony Mendez: Why's that?
Lester Siegel: [shrugs]I was a terrible father. [pause]
Lester Siegel: The bullshit business, it's like coal-mining - you come home to your wife and kids, you can't wash it off.
Movie: Argo
Tony Mendez: [quizzing the houseguests about their cover identities]You. Where was your passport issued?
Bob Anders: Vancouver.
Tony Mendez: Where were you born?
Bob Anders: Toronto.
Tony Mendez: [correcting him]Torono. Canadians don't pronounce the t.
Lee Schatz: Some Komiteh guard is actually gonna know that?
Tony Mendez: If you're detained for questioning, they will bring in someone who knows that, yes.
Bob Anders: Vancouver.
Tony Mendez: Where were you born?
Bob Anders: Toronto.
Tony Mendez: [correcting him]Torono. Canadians don't pronounce the t.
Lee Schatz: Some Komiteh guard is actually gonna know that?
Tony Mendez: If you're detained for questioning, they will bring in someone who knows that, yes.
Movie: Argo