Buffy the Vampire Slayer Quotes
Dawn: I know why you're doing this. I mean,you're practically stalking my sister
Spike: Its not that. I just don't like to see Summers women taking it on the chin. And I mean what I said earlier. You tell her about this, I'll put you in the ground as well.
Spike: Its not that. I just don't like to see Summers women taking it on the chin. And I mean what I said earlier. You tell her about this, I'll put you in the ground as well.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Anya: Don't you like television? I thought all children despise effort and enjoy cartoons.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Buffy: [about a ritual] So, how's it start?
Giles: I, uh, jump out of the circle and I jump back in it and then um, I shake my gourd.
Buffy: I know this ritual! The ancient shamans were next called upon to do the hokey pokey and turn themselves around!
Giles: [affecting annoyance] Go quest.
...
[Giles sighs, then reluctantly jumps out of the circle, jumps back in, and shakes his gourd.]
Buffy: And that's what it's all about.
Giles: I, uh, jump out of the circle and I jump back in it and then um, I shake my gourd.
Buffy: I know this ritual! The ancient shamans were next called upon to do the hokey pokey and turn themselves around!
Giles: [affecting annoyance] Go quest.
...
[Giles sighs, then reluctantly jumps out of the circle, jumps back in, and shakes his gourd.]
Buffy: And that's what it's all about.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Tara: Everyone, before we jump all over her, people do strange things when someone they love dies. When I lost my mother, I did some pretty dumb stuff like lying to my family and staying out all night.
Anya: Buffy's boinking Spike.
[Willow and Tara are left speechless for a moment.]
Willow: Oh. Tara's right. Grief can be powerful, and we shouldn't judge—
Tara: What are you, kidding? She's nuts!
Anya: Buffy's boinking Spike.
[Willow and Tara are left speechless for a moment.]
Willow: Oh. Tara's right. Grief can be powerful, and we shouldn't judge—
Tara: What are you, kidding? She's nuts!
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Xander: No one is judging you. It's understandable. Spike is strong and mysterious and sorta compact but well-muscled.
Buffy: I am not having sex with Spike! But I'm starting to think that you might be!
Buffy: I am not having sex with Spike! But I'm starting to think that you might be!
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Giles: Quite extraordinary, really.
Buffybot: Thank you. But I really think we should be listening to the other Buffy, Guiles. [She pronounces it with a hard G, like "guy."] She's very smart and she's gonna help us save Spike.
Giles: "Guiles?!" [turns to address the real Buffy] Spike didn't even bother to program my name properly!
Buffy: [to the Buffybot] Listen, skirt girl, we're not going to save him. We're going to kill him. He knows who the Key is, and there's no way he's not telling Glory.
Buffybot: You're right. He's evil. But you should see him naked! I mean really!
Buffybot: Thank you. But I really think we should be listening to the other Buffy, Guiles. [She pronounces it with a hard G, like "guy."] She's very smart and she's gonna help us save Spike.
Giles: "Guiles?!" [turns to address the real Buffy] Spike didn't even bother to program my name properly!
Buffy: [to the Buffybot] Listen, skirt girl, we're not going to save him. We're going to kill him. He knows who the Key is, and there's no way he's not telling Glory.
Buffybot: You're right. He's evil. But you should see him naked! I mean really!
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Buffy: [impersonating the Buffybot] Why did you let that Glory hurt you?
Spike: She wanted to know who the Key was.
Buffy: Well, I can tell her, and then you...
Spike: No! You can't ever. Glory never finds out.
Buffy: Why?
Spike: Cause Buffy, the other, not-so-pleasant Buffy... Anything happened to Dawn, it'd destroy her. I couldn't live, her bein' in that much pain. I'd let Glory kill me first. Nearly bloody did.
[Buffy kisses Spike]
Spike: And my robot?
Buffy: The robot is gone. The robot was gross and obscene.
Spike: It wasn't supposed to...
Buffy: Don't. That thing, it wasn't even real. What you did for me and Dawn... that was real. I won't forget it.
Spike: She wanted to know who the Key was.
Buffy: Well, I can tell her, and then you...
Spike: No! You can't ever. Glory never finds out.
Buffy: Why?
Spike: Cause Buffy, the other, not-so-pleasant Buffy... Anything happened to Dawn, it'd destroy her. I couldn't live, her bein' in that much pain. I'd let Glory kill me first. Nearly bloody did.
[Buffy kisses Spike]
Spike: And my robot?
Buffy: The robot is gone. The robot was gross and obscene.
Spike: It wasn't supposed to...
Buffy: Don't. That thing, it wasn't even real. What you did for me and Dawn... that was real. I won't forget it.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Xander: Whatever you choose, you've got my support. Just think of me as... as your... You know, I'm searching for supportive things and I'm coming up all bras. So, something slightly more manly, think of me as that.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Spike: I'm a vampire. I know something about evil. You're not evil.
Dawn: Maybe I'm not evil. But I don't think I can be good.
Spike: Well, I'm not good, and I'm alright.
Dawn: Maybe I'm not evil. But I don't think I can be good.
Spike: Well, I'm not good, and I'm alright.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Willow: Well, I took Psych 101. I mean, I took it from an evil government scientist who was skewered by her Frankenstein-like creation before the final, but I know what a Freudian slip is.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
[Willow is upset at Tara's implication that she isn't committed to their lesbian relationship.]
Willow: I get it. You think you're just a college experiment until I get over the thrill and head back to Boystown.
Willow: I get it. You think you're just a college experiment until I get over the thrill and head back to Boystown.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Spike: So you're saying that a powerful and mightily pissed off witch was planning on going and spilling herself a few pints of God blood until you, what, explained?
Buffy: No, I told Willow it would be like suicide.
Spike: I'd do it. Right person, person I loved, I'd do it.
Buffy: No, I told Willow it would be like suicide.
Spike: I'd do it. Right person, person I loved, I'd do it.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
[On the run from Glory, Giles calms the gang while they wait for Buffy to bring transportation.]
Giles: Look, everything will be alright. We just need to stay here, calm. As soon as Buffy arrives—
[A boxy, beaten-up mobile home pulls up to pick them up.]
Giles: ... we'll feel oddly worse.
Giles: Look, everything will be alright. We just need to stay here, calm. As soon as Buffy arrives—
[A boxy, beaten-up mobile home pulls up to pick them up.]
Giles: ... we'll feel oddly worse.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Spike: Come on. Step on it, gramps
Giles: Step on what? I've driven tricycles with more power than this.
Giles: Step on what? I've driven tricycles with more power than this.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Dawn: Anya's going to try to cook. Want to watch the tears and recriminations?
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Glory: Any last words?
Buffy: Just one. Truck.
[A truck smashes into Glory]
Buffy: Just one. Truck.
[A truck smashes into Glory]
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Dawn: Destroyer of the universe. Guess cutting school doesn't seem so bad now, huh.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Spike: I'm willing to wager when all's said and done, Buffy likes it rough.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Spike: [laughs sarcastically] Oh, I get it. That's very crafty. [nods] Glory's worked the kind of mojo where anyone who sees her little presto-change-o instantly forgets. And yours truly, being somewhat other than human ... stands immune.
Willow: [frowning.] So ... Ben and Glory ... are-are the same person?
Xander: [slowly, like a revelation] Glory can turn into Ben, and Ben turns back into Glory.
Anya: And anyone who sees it instantly forgets.
Spike: [sigh of relief] Kewpie doll for the lady.
Giles: Excellent. Now. Do we suspect there may be some kind of connection between Ben and Glory?
Willow: [frowning.] So ... Ben and Glory ... are-are the same person?
Xander: [slowly, like a revelation] Glory can turn into Ben, and Ben turns back into Glory.
Anya: And anyone who sees it instantly forgets.
Spike: [sigh of relief] Kewpie doll for the lady.
Giles: Excellent. Now. Do we suspect there may be some kind of connection between Ben and Glory?
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Glory: I look around at this world you're so eager to be a part of and all I see is six billion lunatics looking for the fastest ride out. Who's not crazy? Look around, everyone's drinking, smoking, shooting up, shooting each other, or just plain screwing their brains out 'cause they don't want 'em anymore. I'm crazy? Honey, I'm the original one-eyed chicklet in the kingdom of the blind, 'cause at least I admit the world makes me nuts.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Young Buffy: Do you like dolls?
Willow: No, and I think we already deja'd this vu.
Young Buffy: You talk funny.
Willow: Yes, as you will tell me again when we are older and in chem class.
Willow: No, and I think we already deja'd this vu.
Young Buffy: You talk funny.
Willow: Yes, as you will tell me again when we are older and in chem class.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Spike: Found Ben's room at Glory's. Didn't learn much.
Xander: Wait, wait, wait. Ben? At Glory's? [Spike rolls his eyes.] You're saying all this time he's been subletting from her?
Spike: This ... is gonna be worth it.
[Spike bitch-slaps Xander upside the head. The two of them both grab their heads in pain.]
Spike/Xander: Ow!!
Xander: Wait, wait, wait. Ben? At Glory's? [Spike rolls his eyes.] You're saying all this time he's been subletting from her?
Spike: This ... is gonna be worth it.
[Spike bitch-slaps Xander upside the head. The two of them both grab their heads in pain.]
Spike/Xander: Ow!!
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Xander: Why blood? Why Dawn's blood? Why couldn't it be like a-a lymph ritual or something?
Spike: 'Cause it's always got to be blood.
Xander: We're not actually discussing dinner right now.
Spike: Blood is life, lackbrain. Why do you think we eat it? It's what keeps you going. Makes you warm. Makes you hard. Makes you other than dead. 'Course it's her blood.
Spike: 'Cause it's always got to be blood.
Xander: We're not actually discussing dinner right now.
Spike: Blood is life, lackbrain. Why do you think we eat it? It's what keeps you going. Makes you warm. Makes you hard. Makes you other than dead. 'Course it's her blood.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Buffy: This is how many apocalypses for us now?
Giles: Oh, uh, six at least. Feels like a hundred.
Buffy: I've always beaten them. Always won.
Giles: Yes.
Buffy: I sacrificed Angel to save the world. I loved him so much, but I knew what was right. I don't have that anymore. I don't understand. I don't know how to live in this world, if these are the choices, if everything just gets stripped away. I don't see the point. I just wish- I just wish my mom was here.
Giles: Oh, uh, six at least. Feels like a hundred.
Buffy: I've always beaten them. Always won.
Giles: Yes.
Buffy: I sacrificed Angel to save the world. I loved him so much, but I knew what was right. I don't have that anymore. I don't understand. I don't know how to live in this world, if these are the choices, if everything just gets stripped away. I don't see the point. I just wish- I just wish my mom was here.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Buffy: Dawn, listen to me, listen. I love you. I will always love you. But this is the work that I have to do. Tell Giles… tell Giles I figured it out. And, and I'm okay. And give my love to my friends. You have to take care of them now. You have to take care of each other. Dawn, the hardest thing in this world… is to live in it. Be brave. Live… for me.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Buffy: Weapons are by the TV. I'll grab the stuff upstairs.
Spike: Buffy... If you wanna just hand them over the threshold...
Buffy: Come in, Spike.
Spike: Presto. No barrier. I won't bother with the small stuff. Couple of good axes should hold off Glory's mates while you take on the lady herself.
Buffy: We're not all gonna make it. You know that?
Spike: Yeah. Always knew I'd go down fightin'.
Buffy: I'm counting on you to protect her.
Spike: Till the end of the world. Even if that happens to be tonight.
Buffy: I'll be a minute.
Spike: I know you'll never love me. I know that I'm a monster. But you treat me like a man. And that's...Get your stuff. I'll be here
Spike: Buffy... If you wanna just hand them over the threshold...
Buffy: Come in, Spike.
Spike: Presto. No barrier. I won't bother with the small stuff. Couple of good axes should hold off Glory's mates while you take on the lady herself.
Buffy: We're not all gonna make it. You know that?
Spike: Yeah. Always knew I'd go down fightin'.
Buffy: I'm counting on you to protect her.
Spike: Till the end of the world. Even if that happens to be tonight.
Buffy: I'll be a minute.
Spike: I know you'll never love me. I know that I'm a monster. But you treat me like a man. And that's...Get your stuff. I'll be here
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Epitaph: BUFFY ANNE SUMMERS
1980-2001
BELOVED SISTER
DEVOTED FRIEND
SHE SAVED THE WORLD
A LOT
1980-2001
BELOVED SISTER
DEVOTED FRIEND
SHE SAVED THE WORLD
A LOT
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
[Spike, Giles, and Tara are chasing a demon through the cemetery]
Spike: Come on, I'm not going to get anything killed with you lot holding me back.
Tara: I thought the big ones were supposed to tire more easily.
Spike: No, that's over the hill shopkeepers.
Giles: [Out of breath] I'm fine. I just need to die for a minute.
Spike: It was that powder you blew at him that made him rabbit off.
Tara: It was supposed to confuse him but it just made him peppy. Its not supposed to mix with anything. You think he's taking prescription medication?
Spike[Sarcastically]: Yeah, that must be it.
Giles: Well let's hope he doesn't handle any heavy machinery.
Spike: Come on, I'm not going to get anything killed with you lot holding me back.
Tara: I thought the big ones were supposed to tire more easily.
Spike: No, that's over the hill shopkeepers.
Giles: [Out of breath] I'm fine. I just need to die for a minute.
Spike: It was that powder you blew at him that made him rabbit off.
Tara: It was supposed to confuse him but it just made him peppy. Its not supposed to mix with anything. You think he's taking prescription medication?
Spike[Sarcastically]: Yeah, that must be it.
Giles: Well let's hope he doesn't handle any heavy machinery.
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Willow: I got her head back on, didn't I? And I got her off those knock-knock jokes.
Buffybot: Oh, who's there?
Xander: If you want her to be exactly...
Spike: She'll never be exactly.
Xander: I know.
Tara: The only really real Buffy is really Buffy.
Giles: And she's gone.
Buffybot: If you want her to be exactly she'll never be exactly I know the only really real Buffy is really Buffy and she's gone who?
Buffybot: Oh, who's there?
Xander: If you want her to be exactly...
Spike: She'll never be exactly.
Xander: I know.
Tara: The only really real Buffy is really Buffy.
Giles: And she's gone.
Buffybot: If you want her to be exactly she'll never be exactly I know the only really real Buffy is really Buffy and she's gone who?
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Tara: You found the last known Urn of Osiris on eBay?
Anya: Yeah, from this desert gnome in Cairo. He drove a really hard bargain, but I finally got him to throw in a limited-edition Backstreet Boys lunch box for -
[Xander coughs and glares at Anya]
Anya: - a friend.
[Tara smiles knowingly at Xander]
Anya: Yeah, from this desert gnome in Cairo. He drove a really hard bargain, but I finally got him to throw in a limited-edition Backstreet Boys lunch box for -
[Xander coughs and glares at Anya]
Anya: - a friend.
[Tara smiles knowingly at Xander]
TV Show: Buffy the Vampire Slayer