Cheers Quotes
Norm: Mr. Reinhardt. Hi, sir. What a coincidence that you caught me in here. I was just using the washroom.
Mr. Reinhardt: At ease, Peterson. We know you spend a lot of time here. This is where we send your checks.
Mr. Reinhardt: At ease, Peterson. We know you spend a lot of time here. This is where we send your checks.
TV Show: Cheers
Diane: Does Sam's behavior give you pause? Methinks the man doth protest too much.
Woody: Excuse me, Miss Chambers, but shouldn't it be "I thinks"?
Carla: Not in your case, Woody.
Woody: Excuse me, Miss Chambers, but shouldn't it be "I thinks"?
Carla: Not in your case, Woody.
TV Show: Cheers
Carla: Sam Malone never ages. It's one of life's great truths. Let me tell you something Sammy, when you're 87 you'll still be a hunk to me. Of course I'll be senile and blind.
Sam: And pregnant.
Carla: Yeah, probably.
Sam: And pregnant.
Carla: Yeah, probably.
TV Show: Cheers
Nick: Hello sweetcakes. You been thinking about me?
Diane: Only during flea and tick season.
Nick: Well in my neighborhood, that's all year round.
Diane: I'm sure it is.
Diane: Only during flea and tick season.
Nick: Well in my neighborhood, that's all year round.
Diane: I'm sure it is.
TV Show: Cheers
Carla: [on dancing with Nick] It was a magical moment. You know it was like I was transported back in time. I wasn't a tired old woman with six kids. I was a fresh young teenager with two kids.
TV Show: Cheers
Diane: [about Jack Dalton] There's not much to say. He's a man I dated a bit in Europe.
Woody: Was that before or after you dumped Dr. Crane and sent him into an alcoholic tailspin?
Diane: After.
Frasier: How long after?
Diane: Days.
Woody: Was that before or after you dumped Dr. Crane and sent him into an alcoholic tailspin?
Diane: After.
Frasier: How long after?
Diane: Days.
TV Show: Cheers
Woody: Mr. Dalton, you've had so many bizarre and terrifying experiences.
Jack: Some people say I have a death wish. Far from it, I have a life wish.
Cliff: So does Normy.
Norm: What?
Cliff: He wishes he had one.
Jack: Some people say I have a death wish. Far from it, I have a life wish.
Cliff: So does Normy.
Norm: What?
Cliff: He wishes he had one.
TV Show: Cheers
Diane: Dennis Kaufman is a brilliant puppeteer. He does a wonderful Punch & Judy.
Carla: He better have a wonderful punch, if he's going to dress like Judy.
Carla: He better have a wonderful punch, if he's going to dress like Judy.
TV Show: Cheers
[Business isn't doing well at Cheers now that Sam is the host]
Sam: I'll think of something.
Cliff: Skimpy outfits on the waitresses, Sammy.
Sam: That's not bad.
Carla: Wait a minute. I don't want people having a look at something I'm ashamed of.
Sam: You've got a lovely body.
Carla: [pointing at Diane] I was talking about hers.
Sam: I'll think of something.
Diane: Well I don't know what.
Sam: You don't have my brain.
Diane: Whoever has it should return it. You need it right now.
Sam: I'll think of something.
Cliff: Skimpy outfits on the waitresses, Sammy.
Sam: That's not bad.
Carla: Wait a minute. I don't want people having a look at something I'm ashamed of.
Sam: You've got a lovely body.
Carla: [pointing at Diane] I was talking about hers.
Sam: I'll think of something.
Diane: Well I don't know what.
Sam: You don't have my brain.
Diane: Whoever has it should return it. You need it right now.
TV Show: Cheers
Sam: The Fraternal Order of the Caribou are sending a group over.
Diane: Great. Loud-mouthed, rowdy conventioneers. drinking like fish, swearing like sailors and putting their paws all over us.
Carla: Yeah, happy birthday to me.
Diane: Great. Loud-mouthed, rowdy conventioneers. drinking like fish, swearing like sailors and putting their paws all over us.
Carla: Yeah, happy birthday to me.
TV Show: Cheers
Cliff: [to Janet Eldridge] I will deliver you the postal vote.
Carla: Yeah, too bad it will be to the wrong address.
Carla: Yeah, too bad it will be to the wrong address.
TV Show: Cheers
Diane: [about Sam] I think he might be hurt by this liaison with Janet Eldridge.
Carla: Yeah you're right. He's havin' a lot of laughs and a hot time with a beautiful woman. The man is a glutton for punishment.
Carla: Yeah you're right. He's havin' a lot of laughs and a hot time with a beautiful woman. The man is a glutton for punishment.
TV Show: Cheers
Woody: Hey, Mr. Peterson, can I pour you a beer?
Norm: Okay Woody but be sure to stop me at 1. Ah, make that 1: 30.
Norm: Okay Woody but be sure to stop me at 1. Ah, make that 1: 30.
TV Show: Cheers
Janet: Since things are over between you and Diane, I wonder why she still continues to work here.
Sam: She's gotta work someplace.
Janet: She owe you money that's she trying to work off?
Sam: No.
Janet: Would you lose customers if she leave?
Sam: No. As a matter of fact, I'd probably get a few back if I did let her go.
Sam: She's gotta work someplace.
Janet: She owe you money that's she trying to work off?
Sam: No.
Janet: Would you lose customers if she leave?
Sam: No. As a matter of fact, I'd probably get a few back if I did let her go.
TV Show: Cheers
Woody: Looks like Sammy got his walking papers. I know how he feels.
Norm: Yeah I think we've all been there before, Woody.
Cliff: Well it's never happened to me, so I guess I'll just have to imagine it.
Norm: Cliffie, you actually have to go with someone before you can get dumped.
Norm: Yeah I think we've all been there before, Woody.
Cliff: Well it's never happened to me, so I guess I'll just have to imagine it.
Norm: Cliffie, you actually have to go with someone before you can get dumped.
TV Show: Cheers
Woody: How you feeling today, Mr. Peterson?
Norm: Pour.
Woody: I'm so sorry to hear that.
Norm: [pointing to the beer tap] No, I meant pour.
Norm: Pour.
Woody: I'm so sorry to hear that.
Norm: [pointing to the beer tap] No, I meant pour.
TV Show: Cheers
Diane: Sam?
Sam: Did you notice that?
Diane: Notice what?
Sam: Everything just got calm.
Diane: I don't notice any difference.
Sam: Oh, yes, yes. There's a difference in everything. The whole world just changed for me. [pause, looking up] Ohh, look. The stars are new. The moon is new. Sam Malone is new, and I like him. [pointing to the stars] And I like them. And they like me. And none of us like you.
[Sam takes a step towards Diane.]
Diane: Am I going overboard again?
Sam: No, no, no. Don't be silly. That would mean I care, and I don't. Bye bye, Diane.
Diane: Where are you going?
Sam: I'm going to swim ashore.
Diane: You can't do that.
Sam: Very well, I’ll take the dingy. See how quickly the new Sam adjusts.
Diane: You're going to just leave me out here all alone?
Sam: Yes, I am.
Diane: [sighs] Sam. Sam Malone, if you leave me out here all alone, you are the most despicable creature on Earth!
Sam: Well, I... y'am what I y'am, and that's all that I y'am.
Sam: Did you notice that?
Diane: Notice what?
Sam: Everything just got calm.
Diane: I don't notice any difference.
Sam: Oh, yes, yes. There's a difference in everything. The whole world just changed for me. [pause, looking up] Ohh, look. The stars are new. The moon is new. Sam Malone is new, and I like him. [pointing to the stars] And I like them. And they like me. And none of us like you.
[Sam takes a step towards Diane.]
Diane: Am I going overboard again?
Sam: No, no, no. Don't be silly. That would mean I care, and I don't. Bye bye, Diane.
Diane: Where are you going?
Sam: I'm going to swim ashore.
Diane: You can't do that.
Sam: Very well, I’ll take the dingy. See how quickly the new Sam adjusts.
Diane: You're going to just leave me out here all alone?
Sam: Yes, I am.
Diane: [sighs] Sam. Sam Malone, if you leave me out here all alone, you are the most despicable creature on Earth!
Sam: Well, I... y'am what I y'am, and that's all that I y'am.
TV Show: Cheers
Norm: Are you in pain, Woody?
Woody: No, I was just thinkin'.
Norm: Yeah, the first time's always the worst.
Woody: Who do you think Sam's gonna propose to, tonight?
Carla: What're you babblin' about, Billy Bob Joe Jim?
Woody: No, I was just thinkin'.
Norm: Yeah, the first time's always the worst.
Woody: Who do you think Sam's gonna propose to, tonight?
Carla: What're you babblin' about, Billy Bob Joe Jim?
TV Show: Cheers
Sam: The one thing I really hate is to eat alone. I always feel like someone's looking at me.
Diane: I'm the only one here.
Sam: Well you're looking at me.
Diane: You can either join me or I can eat with my eyes closed.
Diane: I'm the only one here.
Sam: Well you're looking at me.
Diane: You can either join me or I can eat with my eyes closed.
TV Show: Cheers
Sam: I see what you're doing here. You're trying to plant a seed in my brain.
Diane: Oh don't be silly. I know of nothing that grows in solid rock.
Diane: Oh don't be silly. I know of nothing that grows in solid rock.
TV Show: Cheers
Carla: Hey, Fitzie, thanks for that $20 tip last night. I don't want you getting the wrong idea about me.
Mr. Fitzgerald: Carla, I know that your favors are not for sale.
Carla: See, that's what I mean about the wrong idea.
Mr. Fitzgerald: Carla, I know that your favors are not for sale.
Carla: See, that's what I mean about the wrong idea.
TV Show: Cheers
Lilith: I suggest that your behavior indicates an unacceptable level of sexual frustration. You strike me as a man who needs professional help. Or perhaps a girlfriend.
Frasier: And you strike me as a woman who could use a good cuffing.
Frasier: And you strike me as a woman who could use a good cuffing.
TV Show: Cheers
Frasier: Don't you see?! What these two people, who are such geniuses at romance, are trying to do is to get you to take your hair down, thinking that it will stimulate me like some sort of Pavlovian dog. So, why don't you just oblige them. Get this silliness over with so we can get on with our lives.
[Lilith takes down her hair and fixes it to where it is over her shoulders.]
Lilith: You mean like this?
Frasier: [lustful] Precisely. You know what?
Lilith: What?
Frasier: I'm going to kiss you. I'm going to kiss you hard and I'm going to kiss you long. But make no mistake about it, I am going to kiss you. In fact, I'm going to kiss you like you've never--
[Lilith throws her arms around Frasier and kisses him in a long embrace.]
Frasier: Yes. Like that. Now, listen, Lilith. I think you and I have just been too articulate for words. We talk and we talk when what we really want to do is show how we feel.
Lilith: I think, Dr. Crane--
Frasier: Look, I don't care what you think. We both wanna be animals. Now, I'm going back to my tastefully decorated townhouse and prove it.
[Frasier starts towards the door. He stops right next to Lilith.]
Frasier: Well, I-I suggest you come with me.
Lilith: I think I see what you're trying to do, Dr. Crane, and I just want you to know...[breathes heavily] It worked.
[Lilith jumps into Frasier's arms.]
Lilith: Let's go.
[Frasier carries Lilith out of Cheers.]
[Lilith takes down her hair and fixes it to where it is over her shoulders.]
Lilith: You mean like this?
Frasier: [lustful] Precisely. You know what?
Lilith: What?
Frasier: I'm going to kiss you. I'm going to kiss you hard and I'm going to kiss you long. But make no mistake about it, I am going to kiss you. In fact, I'm going to kiss you like you've never--
[Lilith throws her arms around Frasier and kisses him in a long embrace.]
Frasier: Yes. Like that. Now, listen, Lilith. I think you and I have just been too articulate for words. We talk and we talk when what we really want to do is show how we feel.
Lilith: I think, Dr. Crane--
Frasier: Look, I don't care what you think. We both wanna be animals. Now, I'm going back to my tastefully decorated townhouse and prove it.
[Frasier starts towards the door. He stops right next to Lilith.]
Frasier: Well, I-I suggest you come with me.
Lilith: I think I see what you're trying to do, Dr. Crane, and I just want you to know...[breathes heavily] It worked.
[Lilith jumps into Frasier's arms.]
Lilith: Let's go.
[Frasier carries Lilith out of Cheers.]
TV Show: Cheers
Carla: Boy, I'll tell you it's hopeless. I have looked everywhere in the Boston area and I just cannot find a house in my price range.
Sam: What's the big rush? Your apartment's fine.
Carla: No, it's not. My kids get bigger, my apartment gets smaller. I don't know what it's like to be alone in the bathroom anymore. What's it like, Sam? Is it everything people say it is?
Sam: More. Much much more.
Carla: I knew it.
Sam: What's the big rush? Your apartment's fine.
Carla: No, it's not. My kids get bigger, my apartment gets smaller. I don't know what it's like to be alone in the bathroom anymore. What's it like, Sam? Is it everything people say it is?
Sam: More. Much much more.
Carla: I knew it.
TV Show: Cheers
Norm: Have you checked out the rest of the place yet?
Carla: No, I thought it might be a good idea to have a beer first.
Norm: Yeah, I find that pretty much applies to everything.
Carla: No, I thought it might be a good idea to have a beer first.
Norm: Yeah, I find that pretty much applies to everything.
TV Show: Cheers
Sam: You wore your socks in the tanning booth?
Cliff: Well I've got to be careful, Sammy. The Clavin men have feet like a baby's bottom.
Carla: With faces to match.
Cliff: Well I've got to be careful, Sammy. The Clavin men have feet like a baby's bottom.
Carla: With faces to match.
TV Show: Cheers
Diane: Sam, may I have your ear for a moment?
Sam: Yeah, just don't leave any bite marks.
Sam: Yeah, just don't leave any bite marks.
TV Show: Cheers