Cops Quotes

Mr. Herman Fleming: Now tell me, what have you learned today? Sit up straight

Devon: That I can hold my breath a lot longer than I thought I could

Mr. Herman Fleming: Do I sense... uh... a little insolence?

Devon: No

Mr. Herman Fleming: Devon, Devon, Devon, Devon, lies are not explanations

Devon: I'm not lying... everyday these big jumbos... come and take my money... they put me in the toilet... and they hold me upside down

TV Show: Cops
Nathan Spring: Do I use people unfairly?

Box: Is it possible to use people fairly?

TV Show: Cops
Nick: [chasing some bad guys with his car] I told you, I'm not getting out of this car. I hate to run!

Chu: [slips and falls down]

Nick: [comes right after him with his car]

Chu: What are you a nut? Oh! Oh!

Nick: I warned you!
[smacks him with car door]

Raymond Sanchez: [seeing this] Do all cops do that?

Devon: [grinning] Only the best.

Nick: [now going after Quintero] Quintero! Who do you think is going to run out of gas first?

TV Show: Cops
Paula Poundstone: I'm not keeping canned goods in my apartment for an earthquake! If I get trapped beneath a beam for three days I'm gonna at least lose weight. I don't want them finding me miraculously after three days and saying Well, Christ, she's huge...I was able to get to some beans, thank God.

TV Show: Cops
Phoebe: Well, what are you going to do? Handcuff her to the bumper of your car and take her for a ride?

Detective John Kimble: Let's just say I'm not going to offer to cook her dinner.

TV Show: Cops
Ray Donlan: See officer, in Garrison, when the car you're gonna tag has got a PDA sticker, I'd advise you to think to yourself, Hey, that's one of the good guys. I think I'll go catch me a bad guy.

Deputy Cindy Betts: If we didn't pull over P.D., there wouldn't be any violations in this town.

TV Show: Cops
Sally Noland: It couldn't of have just been a bullet-proof vest. I hit him in the head at least twice!

Frank McCrae: Look at the marks on your throat.

Sally Noland: I'm telling you, Frank. His hands were so big, and they felt like ice... even through his gloves. He wasn't breathing.

Frank McCrae: Hah... we won't put that in our report, huh?

TV Show: Cops
Security Guard: You always take a leak with a gun in your hand? That's a good way to blow your balls off!

TV Show: Cops
Serge: [Serge is having trouble understanding/pronouncing Axel's first name] Donny, run and tell Miss Summers that Mister Achmed Foley is here to see her...

Axel Foley: No, *Axel* Foley.

Serge: Achnell...? Achwell...

Axel Foley: *Axel*.

Serge: ...Foley is here to see her, he's an old acquaintance.

TV Show: Cops
Serge: [taking notice to Axel's interest in the artwork] I see you look at this piece.

Axel Foley: Yeah. I was wondering how much something like this went for.

Serge: One hundred thirty thousand dollar.

Axel Foley: Get the **** out of here!

Serge: [laughing] No, I can't! I'm serious! It's very important piece.

Axel Foley: Have you ever sold one?

Serge: [proudly] Sold one yesterday to collector.

Axel Foley: Get the **** out of here!

Serge: No! I sold it myself!

TV Show: Cops
Sergeant Taggart: Police! Move and I'll kill you!

TV Show: Cops
Sheriff Freddy Heflin: I can't hear you Ray.

TV Show: Cops
Sheriff Freddy Heflin: I look at this town, and I don't like what I see.

TV Show: Cops
Teresa Mallory: I have no reason to kill him - I LOVE him!

TV Show: Cops
Vickers: You have the right to remain...DEAD.

TV Show: Cops
Announcer: The events you are about to see are true. Real cops, real cases, real criminals. Stories, told by the cops who lived them and will remember them the rest of their lives.

TV Show: Cops
Axel Foley: You can't go in because you're a cop in this town. You go in there without probable cause, they're gonna call it an illegal search. Or didn't they teach you that in cop school?

TV Show: Cops
Axel Foley: [outside the crime scene in front of Axel's apartment building after Mike is killed] Look, I heard a rumor that you're gonna use Rand on this case, and, between the two of us, the guy doesn't know the time of day.
Inspector Douglas Todd: Don't mess with me now, Axel.
Axel Foley: It's the first time he's left his desk in 12 years!
Inspector Douglas Todd: At least he's had 12 years. Anyway, it's a homicide case and it belongs to Rand. Now go to the hospital!
Axel Foley: Well, you don't mind if I ask around a little bit, do you?
Inspector Douglas Todd: Don't do a damn thing! It's Rand's case. Your ass is skating on thin ice as it is!
Axel Foley: Hey, look, we're talking about a friend of mine, here!
Inspector Douglas Todd: Yes, we are, aren't we! Now, let's take a close look at that. One, a hoodlum friend. Two, a professional hit. Three, in a cop's apartment. This whole thing stinks to high heaven!
Axel Foley: How do you know it was a professional hit?
Inspector Douglas Todd: I didn't just walk into this town from the cotton fields! Whoever killed your friend wasn't worried about your little narrow ass. If they were, you'd be lyin' beside him in that meat wagon. Just don't do a damn thing. Stay out of this!
Axel Foley: Well, look. I got some vacation time comin' to me. I wanna take my vacation now.
Inspector Douglas Todd: Stay away from this case, Axel.
Axel Foley: No, it's just that I feel I need a little vacation, that's all.
Inspector Douglas Todd: [after pausing to think for a moment] All right. Soon as you're finished at the hospital, you're on vac

TV Show: Cops
Axel Foley: Hey, we're talking about a friend of mine here!

Inspector Douglas Todd: Yes we are, aren't we? Now lets take a close look at that. 1) A hoodlum friend. 2) A professional hit. 3) In a cops apartment. This whole thing stinks to high heaven.

Axel Foley: How do you know it was a professional hit?

Inspector Douglas Todd: I didn't just walk in here from the corn fields. Whoever popped your little buddy wasn't worried about your little narrow ass. Otherwise, you'd be in the back of that meat wagon with him.

TV Show: Cops
Detective Rosewood: Wow. You know, it says here that by the time the average American is fifty, he's got five pounds of undigested red meat in his bowels.

Sergeant Taggart: Why are you telling me this? What makes you think I have any interest in that at all?

Detective Rosewood: Well, you eat a lot of red meat.

TV Show: Cops
Frank McCrae: Look at the size of those hematomas!

TV Show: Cops
Joseph: Boys have a penis, girls have a vagina!
Phoebe: [to Kimble] I see you taught them the basics.

TV Show: Cops
Karla Fry: Goodbye, Mr. Foley. [Gunshot]
Sergeant Taggart: Women.

TV Show: Cops
Martin Ward: His heart is in Québec.

David Bouchard: Ya l'Ontario dans l'cul aussi!

Martin Ward: What ?

David Bouchard: But his ass belongs to you.

TV Show: Cops
Pal Kenzy: I'm not very good on pool tables, sir.
Commander Griffin: I'm too much of a gentleman to make the obvious comment.
Pal Kenzy: But not to *think* it!
Commander Griffin: A man's thought's are his own.
Pal Kenzy: So long as he keeps them to himself!

TV Show: Cops
Parade reporter: And so this years St Patrick's Day parade continues on schedule, despite speculation the parade may have been cancelled due to fear of violence. Authorities report scores of death threats against the police, plus threats of bombings along the parade route. But this has not deterred a record crowd for turning out for New York's St Patrick's Day parade.

Parade reporter: [glances at spectacle] ... what a parade it is.

TV Show: Cops
Parade reporter: And so this years St Patrick's Day parade continues on schedule, despite speculation the parade may have been cancelled due to fear of violence. Authorities report scores of death threats against the police, plus threats of bombings along the parade route. But this has not deterred a record crowd for turning out for New York's St Patrick's Day parade.
Parade reporter: [glances at spectacle] ... what a parade it is.

TV Show: Cops
Parade reporter: And so this years St Patrick's Day parade continues on schedule, despite speculation the parade may have been cancelled due to fear of violence. Authorities report scores of death threats against the police, plus threats of bombings along the parade route. But this has not deterred a record crowd for turning out for New York's St Patrick's Day parade.

Parade reporter: [glances at spectacle] ... what a parade it is.

TV Show: Cops
Parade reporter: And so this years St Patrick's Day parade continues on schedule, despite speculation the parade may have been cancelled due to fear of violence. Authorities report scores of death threats against the police, plus threats of bombings along the parade route. But this has not deterred a record crowd for turning out for New York's St Patrick's Day parade.
Parade reporter: [glances at spectacle] ... what a parade it is.

TV Show: Cops
Police Chief: Get some cops to protect our policemen!

TV Show: Cops