Crossfire Quotes
Co-Host: I do think you're more fun on your show. Just my opinion. OK, up next, Jon Stewart goes one on one with his fans...
Jon Stewart: You know what's interesting, though? You're as big a dick on your show as you are on any show.
Jon Stewart: You know what's interesting, though? You're as big a dick on your show as you are on any show.
TV Show: Crossfire
Co-Host: When politicians come on...
Jon Stewart: Yes.
Co-Host: It's nice to get them to try and answer the question. And in order to do that, we try and ask them pointed questions. I want to contrast our questions with some questions you asked John Kerry recently... up on the screen.
Jon Stewart: If you want to compare your show to a comedy show, you're more than welcome to.
Co-Host: No, no, no, here's the point.
Jon Stewart: If that's your goal.
Co-Host: It's not.
Jon Stewart: I wouldn't aim for us. I'd aim for "Seinfeld." That's a very good show.
Jon Stewart: Yes.
Co-Host: It's nice to get them to try and answer the question. And in order to do that, we try and ask them pointed questions. I want to contrast our questions with some questions you asked John Kerry recently... up on the screen.
Jon Stewart: If you want to compare your show to a comedy show, you're more than welcome to.
Co-Host: No, no, no, here's the point.
Jon Stewart: If that's your goal.
Co-Host: It's not.
Jon Stewart: I wouldn't aim for us. I'd aim for "Seinfeld." That's a very good show.
TV Show: Crossfire
Co-Host: Which candidate do you suppose would provide you better material?
Jon Stewart: I'm sorry?
Co-Host: Which candidate do you suppose would provide you better material if he won?
Jon Stewart: Mr. T. I think he'd be the funniest. I don't...
Co-Host: Don't you have a stake in it that way, as not just a citizen, but as a professional comic.
Jon Stewart: Right, which I hold to be much more important than as a citizen.
Co-Host: Well, there you go.
Co-Host: But who would you provide you better material, do you suppose?
Jon Stewart: I don't really know. That's kind of not how we look at it. We look at, the absurdity of the system provides us the most material. And that is best served by sort of the theater of it all, you know, which, by the way, thank you both, because it's been helpful.
Jon Stewart: I'm sorry?
Co-Host: Which candidate do you suppose would provide you better material if he won?
Jon Stewart: Mr. T. I think he'd be the funniest. I don't...
Co-Host: Don't you have a stake in it that way, as not just a citizen, but as a professional comic.
Jon Stewart: Right, which I hold to be much more important than as a citizen.
Co-Host: Well, there you go.
Co-Host: But who would you provide you better material, do you suppose?
Jon Stewart: I don't really know. That's kind of not how we look at it. We look at, the absurdity of the system provides us the most material. And that is best served by sort of the theater of it all, you know, which, by the way, thank you both, because it's been helpful.
TV Show: Crossfire
Co-Host: Right. But of the nine guys running, who do you think was best. Do you think he was the best, the most impressive?
Jon Stewart: The most impressive?
Co-Host: Yes
Jon Stewart: I thought Al Sharpton was pretty impressive.I enjoyed his way of speaking. I think, oftentimes, the person that knows they can't win is allowed to speak the most freely, because, otherwise, shows with titles, such as CROSSFIRE.
Co-Host: Crossfire
Jon Stewart: Or HARDBALL or I'm Going to Kick Your Ass or... [Laughter from Audience]
Jon Stewart: Will Jump on it.
Jon Stewart: The most impressive?
Co-Host: Yes
Jon Stewart: I thought Al Sharpton was pretty impressive.I enjoyed his way of speaking. I think, oftentimes, the person that knows they can't win is allowed to speak the most freely, because, otherwise, shows with titles, such as CROSSFIRE.
Co-Host: Crossfire
Jon Stewart: Or HARDBALL or I'm Going to Kick Your Ass or... [Laughter from Audience]
Jon Stewart: Will Jump on it.
TV Show: Crossfire
Gene Thompson: [amidst gunfire] Barkow forced Anne to marry him.
Rafe Covington: What?
Gene Thompson: They got married.
Rafe Covington: I heard ya. [to Barkow]
Rafe Covington: Barkow, you still hiding behind that woman?
Bruce Barkow: That's my wife you're talking about.
Rafe Covington: [pause] Send her out.
Bruce Barkow: You come and get her. [proceeds to fire]
Rafe Covington: What?
Gene Thompson: They got married.
Rafe Covington: I heard ya. [to Barkow]
Rafe Covington: Barkow, you still hiding behind that woman?
Bruce Barkow: That's my wife you're talking about.
Rafe Covington: [pause] Send her out.
Bruce Barkow: You come and get her. [proceeds to fire]
TV Show: Crossfire
Jon Stewart: In many ways, it's funny. And I made a special effort to come on the show today, because I have privately, amongst my friends and also in occasional newspapers and television shows, mentioned this show as being bad.
Co-Host: We have noticed.
Jon Stewart: And I wanted to - I felt that that wasn't fair and I should come here and tell you that I don't - it's not so much that it's bad, as it's hurting America.
Co-Host: But in its defense...
Jon Stewart: So I wanted to come here today and say... Here's just what I wanted to tell you guys.
Co-Host: Yes.
Jon Stewart: Stop.Stop, stop, stop, stop hurting America.
Co-Host: Ok. Now.
Jon Stewart: And come work for us, because we, as the people...
Co-Host: How do you pay?
Jon Stewart: The people? Not well...
Co-Host: Better than CNN I'm sure.
Jon Stewart: But you can sleep at night.
Co-Host: We have noticed.
Jon Stewart: And I wanted to - I felt that that wasn't fair and I should come here and tell you that I don't - it's not so much that it's bad, as it's hurting America.
Co-Host: But in its defense...
Jon Stewart: So I wanted to come here today and say... Here's just what I wanted to tell you guys.
Co-Host: Yes.
Jon Stewart: Stop.Stop, stop, stop, stop hurting America.
Co-Host: Ok. Now.
Jon Stewart: And come work for us, because we, as the people...
Co-Host: How do you pay?
Jon Stewart: The people? Not well...
Co-Host: Better than CNN I'm sure.
Jon Stewart: But you can sleep at night.
TV Show: Crossfire