Dead Ringers Quote
Harry Potter: I need your advice, kindly old Dumbledore.
Gandalf: No. What you need, Potter, are new glasses. I'm not Dumbledore, I'm Gandalf. The wise old wizard that guides a youthful hero on a journey of discovery.
Harry: Yes, that's right, Dumbledore.
Gandalf: Frodo, tell him that I'm Gandalf.
Frodo: You're not Gandalf, Gandalf's here! [Points at Obi-Wan Kenobi ] The wise wizard that guides a young hero on a brave quest!
Obi-Wan: No, young acolyte, I'm not Gandalf. I'm the old master who schools a young hero in a mystic art.
Harry: Dumbledore!
Obi-Wan: I'm not bloody Dumbledore. I'm the one who sacrifices himself in the first part of the trilogy, then comes back from the dead to help the hero!
Gandalf: You've nicked that bit off me!
Frodo: Harry, Dumbledore doesn't appear in this film because the actor who plays him is dead, but he will return played by somebody else.
Obi-Wan: Like me, they've nicked that bit too!
Gandalf: Look, it's my movie that's breaking all box office records, not your piss poor effort!
[Obi-Wan and Gandalf fight. Darth Vader enters.]
Gandalf: Oh, that's all we need. (!) The evil villain who dabbles in the Dark Side of the mystic realm.
Frodo: Saruman!
Obi-Wan: No, that's [Vader] the villain who kills the father of the hero!
Harry: That's Lord Voldemort!
Vader: I'm not Voldemort! Anyway, that's just a story they tell the hero. The truth is I'm really his father.
Harry: You're my father?
Vader: I am. [Beat] Oh, bugger! That's really spoilt the ending of the fifth book, hasn't it?
Gandalf: No. What you need, Potter, are new glasses. I'm not Dumbledore, I'm Gandalf. The wise old wizard that guides a youthful hero on a journey of discovery.
Harry: Yes, that's right, Dumbledore.
Gandalf: Frodo, tell him that I'm Gandalf.
Frodo: You're not Gandalf, Gandalf's here! [Points at Obi-Wan Kenobi ] The wise wizard that guides a young hero on a brave quest!
Obi-Wan: No, young acolyte, I'm not Gandalf. I'm the old master who schools a young hero in a mystic art.
Harry: Dumbledore!
Obi-Wan: I'm not bloody Dumbledore. I'm the one who sacrifices himself in the first part of the trilogy, then comes back from the dead to help the hero!
Gandalf: You've nicked that bit off me!
Frodo: Harry, Dumbledore doesn't appear in this film because the actor who plays him is dead, but he will return played by somebody else.
Obi-Wan: Like me, they've nicked that bit too!
Gandalf: Look, it's my movie that's breaking all box office records, not your piss poor effort!
[Obi-Wan and Gandalf fight. Darth Vader enters.]
Gandalf: Oh, that's all we need. (!) The evil villain who dabbles in the Dark Side of the mystic realm.
Frodo: Saruman!
Obi-Wan: No, that's [Vader] the villain who kills the father of the hero!
Harry: That's Lord Voldemort!
Vader: I'm not Voldemort! Anyway, that's just a story they tell the hero. The truth is I'm really his father.
Harry: You're my father?
Vader: I am. [Beat] Oh, bugger! That's really spoilt the ending of the fifth book, hasn't it?
TV Show: Dead Ringers
