Dilbert Quote
Dilbert: Good morning, shower!
Automated Shower Machine: Good morning, Dilbert!
Dogbert: Hmm, don't you do enough engineering at work?
Dilbert: Work is just meetings, this is engineering. If this works, someday all showers will be voice activated.
Dogbert[sitting on a stool]: Is it that hard to turn the knobs?
Dilbert: It's not that it's hard, it's unnecessary. [To ASM] 99, please.
ASM: 99. [shower turns on at 99 degrees; Dilbert steps inside]
Dogbert[aside]: 400.
[The ASM does nothing]
Dilbert: Heh-heh, nice try. But the shower is calibrated to respond to my voice only.
Dogbert: Why, you think of everything!
Dilbert: I'm cautious.
Dogbert: That's why you had training wheels on your bike until you were seventeen.
Dilbert: I was fourteen.
ASM: 14. [makes the shower temperature 14 degrees]
Dilbert: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! [is frozen in a block of ice] 99! 99! 99! [shower goes back to 99 degrees, as the ice melts] Don't do that!
Dogbert: Where'd you get the voice for that thing? It sounds like the voice for that stupid movie; what was it called, "something, something, a Space Odyssey"?
Dilbert: It wasn't "Something, something, a Space Odyssey", it was "2001: A Spa-" [cut to the exterior of the house, as the ASM evidently makes the shower temperature 2001 degrees] AAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!!!
[back inside, a red-skinned Dilbert wraps a towel around himself, which then catches on fire as he walks off-screen]
Dogbert: On the plus-side, you look very clean.
Automated Shower Machine: Good morning, Dilbert!
Dogbert: Hmm, don't you do enough engineering at work?
Dilbert: Work is just meetings, this is engineering. If this works, someday all showers will be voice activated.
Dogbert[sitting on a stool]: Is it that hard to turn the knobs?
Dilbert: It's not that it's hard, it's unnecessary. [To ASM] 99, please.
ASM: 99. [shower turns on at 99 degrees; Dilbert steps inside]
Dogbert[aside]: 400.
[The ASM does nothing]
Dilbert: Heh-heh, nice try. But the shower is calibrated to respond to my voice only.
Dogbert: Why, you think of everything!
Dilbert: I'm cautious.
Dogbert: That's why you had training wheels on your bike until you were seventeen.
Dilbert: I was fourteen.
ASM: 14. [makes the shower temperature 14 degrees]
Dilbert: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! [is frozen in a block of ice] 99! 99! 99! [shower goes back to 99 degrees, as the ice melts] Don't do that!
Dogbert: Where'd you get the voice for that thing? It sounds like the voice for that stupid movie; what was it called, "something, something, a Space Odyssey"?
Dilbert: It wasn't "Something, something, a Space Odyssey", it was "2001: A Spa-" [cut to the exterior of the house, as the ASM evidently makes the shower temperature 2001 degrees] AAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!!!
[back inside, a red-skinned Dilbert wraps a towel around himself, which then catches on fire as he walks off-screen]
Dogbert: On the plus-side, you look very clean.
TV Show: Dilbert
