Drake and Josh Quotes
Josh: I'd just like to say, BUSTED!!
Susan: Drake, did you hear what he just said to me?!
Drake: Uh, yeah, I think he just said, BUSTED!!
Susan: Drake, did you hear what he just said to me?!
Drake: Uh, yeah, I think he just said, BUSTED!!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Josh: [singing] Shavin' in the bathtub! Shavin' in the bathtub! [making electric razor noises]
TV Show: Drake and Josh
[after Susan dumps both of them]
Josh: I think we handled that very maturely.
Drake: Yes, that felt good.
[Susan gets paint sprayed on her from her locker]
Drake: ... That felt better.
Josh: Yeah, it did!
Josh: I think we handled that very maturely.
Drake: Yes, that felt good.
[Susan gets paint sprayed on her from her locker]
Drake: ... That felt better.
Josh: Yeah, it did!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Josh: [dangling from the roof] I deserve this. This is all because I forgot to feed my turtle Sheldon in kindergarten! He went to Heaven, and now my life is bad! [looks up] Ya happy, Sheldon?! We're even now!
Walter: [offscreen] Josh?
Josh: SHELDON?!
Walter: [offscreen] Josh?
Josh: SHELDON?!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
[on the phone]
Josh: Goo goo, gaa!
Mrs. Galloway: Aw, he sounds so happy. Hello, little Maxie. Hi!
Josh: Mama!
Mrs. Galloway: [gasps] He said "Mama!" That's his first word! Oh, Max, oh, say it again!
Josh: MAMA!
Josh: Goo goo, gaa!
Mrs. Galloway: Aw, he sounds so happy. Hello, little Maxie. Hi!
Josh: Mama!
Mrs. Galloway: [gasps] He said "Mama!" That's his first word! Oh, Max, oh, say it again!
Josh: MAMA!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
[Drake winds the singing bear's head too hard that it breaks off]
Josh: I said wind it, not murder it!
Josh: I said wind it, not murder it!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
[after the phone goes into the fish bowl with Max crying]
Josh: Oh, the baby!
Drake: Oh, the fishes!
Josh: Oh, the baby!
Drake: Oh, the fishes!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Drake: All right. Where is he?
Megan: I think he's dangling in the gutter.
Drake: Not Josh, the baby!
Megan: [innocently] What makes you think that I would have the baby?
Drake: Because you're a divious, twisted little girl.
Megan: [giggles] Why thank you, Drake!
Megan: I think he's dangling in the gutter.
Drake: Not Josh, the baby!
Megan: [innocently] What makes you think that I would have the baby?
Drake: Because you're a divious, twisted little girl.
Megan: [giggles] Why thank you, Drake!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Drake: Good luck with Kathy. Remember, she's just a person. I mean girls are just guys without... Just do good.
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Drake: Do you want to be honest, or do you want a girlfriend?
Josh: Girlfriend, please.
Josh: Girlfriend, please.
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Josh: It's like girls and I speak different languages. They speak Engish, I speak Idiot.
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Scotty: Can you believe it? We made it backstage!
Rina: This is not backstage!
Paul: This is practically jail!
Drake: Those guys are cops!
Rina: Yes! Scary cops who are going to arrest us for having fake tickets, Scotty!
Scotty: Guys, the tickets are not fake.
Drake: Are you sure?
Scotty: I photocopied them myself.
Drake: You can't photocopy tickets!
Scotty: Yes, you can! You just put them on the glass, close the liddy thingy and press copy. Any moron could do it.
Drake: No, not just any moron, it takes a special moron, like you!
Rina: This is not backstage!
Paul: This is practically jail!
Drake: Those guys are cops!
Rina: Yes! Scary cops who are going to arrest us for having fake tickets, Scotty!
Scotty: Guys, the tickets are not fake.
Drake: Are you sure?
Scotty: I photocopied them myself.
Drake: You can't photocopy tickets!
Scotty: Yes, you can! You just put them on the glass, close the liddy thingy and press copy. Any moron could do it.
Drake: No, not just any moron, it takes a special moron, like you!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Josh: Hey, where's Drake with our pizza?
Drake: [offscreen] I cannot believe I ate an entire pizza!
Drake: [offscreen] I cannot believe I ate an entire pizza!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Drake: At least we have a little time before she gets here. Let's have fun while we can.
Grammy: [enters] What, you can't remember to lock the door?
Drake: Wow, weren't those two seconds fun?
Grammy: [enters] What, you can't remember to lock the door?
Drake: Wow, weren't those two seconds fun?
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Josh: Why are you so mean to Drake?
Grammy: Because I know his type. I dated twelve musicians like him before I dated your grandfather.
Josh: I dont think I want to know about you dating a dozen musical men.
Grammy: Then I won't tell you what happened last Saturday night.
Grammy: Because I know his type. I dated twelve musicians like him before I dated your grandfather.
Josh: I dont think I want to know about you dating a dozen musical men.
Grammy: Then I won't tell you what happened last Saturday night.
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Drake: Last week Josh challenged me to see who could hold his breath the longest.
Josh: We had this contest to see who could hold their breath longer. After two minutes...
Drake: I won.
Josh: I lost...consciousness.
Drake: I was breathing through my nose the whole time.
Josh: Oh, and then there was the milk challenge.
Drake: I bet Josh my allowance that he couldn't chug an entire gallon of milk, but he did it. I lost.
Josh: I threw up.
Drake: He puked.
Drake and Josh: It was worth it!
Josh: We had this contest to see who could hold their breath longer. After two minutes...
Drake: I won.
Josh: I lost...consciousness.
Drake: I was breathing through my nose the whole time.
Josh: Oh, and then there was the milk challenge.
Drake: I bet Josh my allowance that he couldn't chug an entire gallon of milk, but he did it. I lost.
Josh: I threw up.
Drake: He puked.
Drake and Josh: It was worth it!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Drake: Oh, just face it, Josh: you're addicted to video games.
Josh: I am not addicted to them! [grinning] I am in love with them!
Josh: I am not addicted to them! [grinning] I am in love with them!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Drake: Ooh, look at me, I'm Josh! I don't need girls; I got me a VIDEO GAME!
Josh: Ooh, look at me, I'm Drake! Nutrition? Not for me! I'm gonna have me a big ol' bag of CHEESE BALLS!
Drake: Which you're allergic to.
Josh: [uses a vaccum to suck the cheese balls from his mouth]
Josh: Ooh, look at me, I'm Drake! Nutrition? Not for me! I'm gonna have me a big ol' bag of CHEESE BALLS!
Drake: Which you're allergic to.
Josh: [uses a vaccum to suck the cheese balls from his mouth]
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Audrey: You were too busy to go get your sister, but you weren't too busy to play video games all day!
Drake: Josh.
Audrey: Or to sit around swallowing 20 pounds of junk food!
Josh: Drake.
Megan: [to Audrey] I keep telling you, they're bad people!!
Drake: Josh.
Audrey: Or to sit around swallowing 20 pounds of junk food!
Josh: Drake.
Megan: [to Audrey] I keep telling you, they're bad people!!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
[Grammy has sent Josh a GameSphere]
Josh: It's a GameSphere!
Drake: No way! The GameSphere doesn't come out for another month.
Josh: Never underestimate Grammy!
Walter: Whoa, hold on. What's a GameSphere?
Josh: Only the most sophisticating gaming experience ever created by humans! And...it's spherical. SPHERICAL!!
Josh: It's a GameSphere!
Drake: No way! The GameSphere doesn't come out for another month.
Josh: Never underestimate Grammy!
Walter: Whoa, hold on. What's a GameSphere?
Josh: Only the most sophisticating gaming experience ever created by humans! And...it's spherical. SPHERICAL!!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Josh: I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!I HAVE TO PLAY THE GAMESPHERE! IT'S SPHERICAL!!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Megan: All you have to do is sabotage Drake.
Josh: [grins evilly] Sabotage. Josh like!
Josh: [grins evilly] Sabotage. Josh like!
TV Show: Drake and Josh
Drake: Josh, what did you do? Everything's all candy and junk food.
Josh: [matter-of-factly] Yes. I suppose it is!
Drake: But, Josh, how did you--?
[Josh raises big candy cane in front of Drake]
Josh: Don't ask. [eats a piece of candy] Just enjoy.
Josh: [matter-of-factly] Yes. I suppose it is!
Drake: But, Josh, how did you--?
[Josh raises big candy cane in front of Drake]
Josh: Don't ask. [eats a piece of candy] Just enjoy.
TV Show: Drake and Josh