Fargo Quotes

Carl Showalter: I want to go somewhere where I can get a shot and a steak, maybe, not more ****in' pancakes, c'mon. Come on, man! Alright- here's an idea. I know this place outside of Brainerd where we can get laid, what do you think?
Gaer Grimsrud: I'm ****ing hungry now, you know.

Movie: Fargo
Gaer Grimsrud: You're a smooth smooth, you know.

Movie: Fargo
Jean Lundegaard: [chopping vegetables] Hiya, hon! Welcome back! How was Fargo?
Jerry Lundegaard: Yah, real good now.
Jean Lundegaard: Dad's here. [Jerry's mood changes as he hears this news]
Jerry Lundegaard: Is he stayin' for supper then?
Jean Lundegaard: I dunno... I think so. Dad?
Wade Gustafson: What?
Jean Lundegaard: [thick Minnesota accent] You stayin' for supperrrrr?
Wade Gustafson: Yah!

Movie: Fargo
Marge Gunderson: You have no call to get snippy with me; I'm just trying to do my job here.

Movie: Fargo
Willow Creek Sheriff: What's in the strong box?
Button Smith: Gold I reckon - it's that heavy. Wells Fargo doesn't tell us what we're guardin'; they just say "Guard it!"

Movie: Fargo
Jerry Lundegaard : [ talking to Carl on the phone ] Now, we had a deal. A deal's a deal.
Carl Showalter : Is it, Jerry? Why don't you ask those three poor souls in Brainerd if a deal's a deal. Go ahead, ask them!
Jerry Lundegaard : The heck do ya mean?
Carl Showalter : [ mimicking Jerry mockingly ] "The heckya mean?"

Movie: Fargo
[ repeated line ]
Jerry Lundegaard : The heck do ya mean?

Movie: Fargo
Jerry Lundegaard : [ answering the phone ] Jerry Lundegaard.
Carl Showalter : [ voice over the phone ] Alright, Jerry, you got the phone to yourself? Are you alone?
Jerry Lundegaard : [ into the phone ] Well, yeah.
Carl Showalter : [ voice ] You know who this is?
Jerry Lundegaard : Well, yeah, I got an idea. How's that Ciera working out for ya?
Carl Showalter : [ voice ] Circumstances have changed, Jerry.
Jerry Lundegaard : Well, what do ya mean?
Carl Showalter : [ voice ] Things have changed, circumstances, Jerry... force majeure, acts of God.
Jerry Lundegaard : How's Jean?
Carl Showalter : [ puzzled ] Who's Jean?
Jerry Lundegaard : My wife! What the-?
Carl Showalter : Oh... right. She's alright, but there's a few people in Brainerd who aren't so okay, I'll tell you that.
Jerry Lundegaard : What the heck are ya talking about? Let's just finish this deal up here.
Carl Showalter : Blood has been shed, Jerry.
Jerry Lundegaard : What the heck do ya mean?
Carl Showalter : Three people, in Brainerd... are dead.
Jerry Lundegaard : Oh, jeez!
Carl Showalter : That's right, we need more money.
Jerry Lundegaard : What the heck are ya talking about? What do you fellas have yourself mixed up in?
Carl Showalter : Never mind. We need more money...
Jerry Lundegaard : [ interrupting ] This was supposed to be a no rough stuff type deal!
Carl Showalter : [ angry ] DON'T EVER INTERRUPT ME, JERRY! JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!
Jerry Lundegaard : Well, I'm sorry, but I just... I don't...
Carl Showalter : I'm

Movie: Fargo
Jerry Lundegaard : I told ya. We haven't had any vehicles go missing.
Marge Gunderson : Okay! But are ya sure? 'Cause I mean, how do you know? Do you do a count, or what kind of a routine do you have here?
Jerry Lundegaard : [ growing uncomfortable with this questioning ] Ma'am, I answered your question!
Marge Gunderson : [ long pause ] I'm sorry, sir?
Jerry Lundegaard : Ma'am, I answered your question. I answered the darned... I'm cooperatin' here!
Marge Gunderson : Sir, you have no call to get snippy with me, I'm just doing my job here.
Jerry Lundegaard : I'm... I'm not arguing here! I'm cooperating. So there's no need to... we're doin' all we can here.
Marge Gunderson : Sir, could I talk to Mr. Gustafson? [ Jerry gives her a glassy-eyed look, knowing full well that Gustafson is dead ]
Marge Gunderson : Mr. Lundegaard?

Movie: Fargo
Mr. Mohra : So, I'm tendin' bar there at Ecklund and Swedlin's last Tuesday, and this little guy's drinkin' and he says, "So where can a guy find some action? I'm goin' crazy out there at the lake." And I says, "What kinda action?" and he says, "Woman action, what do I look like?" And I says, "Well, what do I look like, I don't arrange that kinda thing," and he says, "But I'm goin' crazy out there at the lake," and I says, "Well, this ain't that kinda place."
Officer Olson : Uh-huh.
Mr. Mohra : So he angrily says, "Oh I get it, so you think I'm some kinda crazy jerk for askin'," only he doesn't use the word "jerk."
Officer Olson : I understand.
Mr. Mohra : And then he calls me a jerk, and says that the last guy who thought he was a jerk is dead now. So I don't say nothin' and he says, "What do ya think about that?" So I says, "Well, that don't sound like too good a deal for him, then."
Officer Olson : [ chuckles ] Ya got that right.
Mr. Mohra : And he says, "Yah, that guy's dead, and I don't mean of old age." And then he says, "Geez, I'm goin' crazy out there at the lake."
Officer Olson : White Bear Lake?
Mr. Mohra : Well... Ecklund & Swedlin's, that's closer ta Moose Lake, so I made that assumption.
Officer Olson : Oh sure.
Mr. Mohra : So, ya know, he's drinkin', so I don't think a whole great deal of it, but Mrs. Mohra heard about the homicides down here last week and she thought I should call it in, so... I called it in. End o' story.
Officer Olson : What'd this guy look like, anyway?
Mr. Mohra : Oh, he was a little guy... Kinda funny lookin'.
Officer Olson : Uh-huh. In what way?
Mr. Mohra : Oh, just in a general kinda way.

Movie: Fargo
Marge Gunderson : [ reporting over her police radio ] There's the car! There's the car!
Lou : What car?
Marge Gunderson : My car, my car! Tan Ciera, tan Ciera!

Movie: Fargo
[ first lines ]
Jerry Lundegaard : I'm, uh, Jerry Lundegaard.
Carl Showalter : You're Jerry Lundegaard?
Jerry Lundegaard : Ya. Shep Proudfoot said...
Carl Showalter : Shep said you'd be here at 7: 30. What gives, man?
Jerry Lundegaard : Shep said 8: 30.
Carl Showalter : We've been sitting here an hour. He's [ motioning to Gaer ]
Carl Showalter : peed three times already.
Jerry Lundegaard : I'm sure sorry. Shep told me 8: 30. It was a mix-up, I guess.

Movie: Fargo
[ last lines ]
Norm Gunderson : [ rubbing Margie's pregnant stomach ] Two more months.
Marge Gunderson : [ smiling ] Two more months.

Movie: Fargo
Carl Showalter : You know, it's proven that second-hand smoke is, uh, carcin-... uh, you know, cancer related.

Movie: Fargo
Marge Gunderson : So that was Mrs. Lundegaard on the floor in there. And I guess that was your accomplice in the wood chipper. And those three people in Brainerd. And for what? For a little bit of money. There's more to life than a little money, you know. Don'tcha know that? And here ya are, and it's a beautiful day. Well. I just don't understand it.

Movie: Fargo
Gaear Grimsrud : You're a smooth smoothie, you know?

Movie: Fargo
Airport Lot Attendant : There's a minimum charge of four dollars; long-term parking charges by the day.
Carl Showalter : I guess you think you're... you know, like an authority figure, with that stupid fuckin' uniform, huh buddy? King clip-on-tie there, big fuckin' man, huh? You know these are the limits of your life, man. The rule of your little fuckin' gate here. Here's your four dollars, you pathetic piece of shit.

Movie: Fargo
Gaear Grimsrud : I need unguent.

Movie: Fargo
Carl Showalter : [ entering cabin, with shot-up face ] You should see the other guy.
Carl Showalter : [ he sees Jean Lundegaard's dead body ] What the fuck happened to her?
Gaear Grimsrud : [ watching TV and eating TV dinner ] Uh, she started shrieking, y'know. She wouldn't stop...
Carl Showalter : Geesus. Well, it doen't matter. I got the money. All of it. All eighty grand.
Carl Showalter : [ he puts a couple stacks of bills down on table ] That's forty for you, forty for me. [ Grimsrud pokes at the stacks of bills with his fork ]
Carl Showalter : That's it, then. We go our seperate ways now. Here's the keys to my truck. You can have it. I'm takin' the Ciera and headin' north.
Gaear Grimsrud : No! The truck's yours. We split the Ciera.
Carl Showalter : [ pause ] How the fuck do you split a car, ya dummy? With a fuckin' chainsaw?
Gaear Grimsrud : One of us pays the other for half. If you want the car, you have to give me your half of the money.
Carl Showalter : Hold on! No fuckin' way! You fuckin' notice this? I got fuckin' shot! I got fuckin' shot in the face! I went and got the fuckin' money. I got shot fuckin' picking it up! I've been up for thirty-six fuckin' hours! I'm taking' that fuckin' car! That fucker's mine, you fuckin' asshole! [ as usual, no response from Grimsrud ]
Carl Showalter : You know, I've been listening to your fuckin' bullshit all week! Are we square? [ no response from Grimsrud who continues staring at the TV ]
Carl Showalter : [ flashing his gun ] I said are WE square? [ no response ]
Carl Showalter : Yeah, ya fuckin' mute. And if you see your friend Shep Proudfoot, tell him I'm gonna nail his fuckin' ass! [ he exits angrily toward the Ciera; after a few moments, Grim

Movie: Fargo
Carl Showalter : What kind of trouble are you in, Jerry?
Jerry Lundegaard : Well, that's, that's, I'm not gonna go inta, inta - see, I just need money.

Movie: Fargo
Jerry Lundegaard : Well, heck, if you wanna play games here! I'm workin' with ya on this thing, but I... Okay, I'll do a damned lot count!
Marge Gunderson : Sir? Right now?
Jerry Lundegaard : Sure, right now! You're darned tootin'!

Movie: Fargo
Carl Showalter : I'm not gonna debate you, Jerry.
Jerry Lundegaard : Okay.
Carl Showalter : I'm not gonna sit here and debate.

Movie: Fargo
Carl Showalter : Oh, fuck it, I don't have to talk, either, man! See how you like it. Just total fuckin' silence. Two can play at that game, smart guy. We'll just see how you like it. Total silence.

Movie: Fargo
Marge Gunderson : Ah, hon, ya got Arby's all over me.

Movie: Fargo
Gaear Grimsrud : Where is pancakes house?
Carl Showalter : What?
Gaear Grimsrud : We stop at pancakes house.
Carl Showalter : ...what're you nuts? We had pancakes for breakfast. Gotta go to a place I can get a shot and a beer, steak, maybe, not more fuckin' pancakes, c'mon.
Gaear Grimsrud : [ Gaear just stares at Carl ]
Carl Showalter : Oh, come on, man! Okay, here's an idea; we can stop outside of Brainerd, I know a place there we can get laid. Whaddya think?
Gaear Grimsrud : I'm fucking hungry now, you know!
Carl Showalter : Yeah yeah Jesus, I'm sayin' - we can... stop, get pancakes and then we'll get laid, alright?
Gaear Grimsrud : [ Gaear glares briefly ]

Movie: Fargo
[ Marge bends over next to the overturned car, as if she's looking at something on the ground ]
Lou : You alright there, Margie?
Marge Gunderson : Oh, I just think I'm gonna barf...
Marge Gunderson : [ standing up again after a moment ] ... Well, that passed. Now I'm hungry again.

Movie: Fargo
Marge Gunderson : I'm not sure I agree with you a hundred percent on your police work, there, Lou.

Movie: Fargo
Stan Grossman : But you're sayin'... what are ya sayin'?

Movie: Fargo
Mike Yanagita : So, uh, you married old Norm son-of-a-Gunderson?

Movie: Fargo
Marge Gunderson : OK, so we got a trooper pulls someone over, we got a shooting, these folks drive by, there's a high-speed pursuit, ends here and then this execution-type deal.

Movie: Fargo