Firefly Quotes
[Flashback to the war, where Zoe quietly kills a man about to shoot a private having a meal.]
Tracey: Thanks. I didn't know you were out there.
Zoe: Sort of the point. Stealth—you may have heard of it.
Tracey: I don't think they covered that in basic.
Zoe: Well, at least they covered "Dropping Your Weapon So You Can Eat Beans and Get Yourself Shot".
Tracey: Yeah, I got a badge in that. [seriously] Won't happen again.
Zoe: It does, I'm just gonna watch.
. . .
Zoe: First rule of battle, little one… don't ever let them know where you are.
[Cut to Mal, firing behind himself as he runs toward the two.]
Mal: WHOO-HOO! I'M RIGHT HERE! I'M RIGHT HERE! YOU WANT SOME O' ME?! YEAH YOU DO! COME ON! COME ON! AAAAAH!
[He lands with a grunt behind some nearby rubble.]
Mal: Whoo-hoo!
Zoe: 'Course, there're other schools of thought.
Tracey: Thanks. I didn't know you were out there.
Zoe: Sort of the point. Stealth—you may have heard of it.
Tracey: I don't think they covered that in basic.
Zoe: Well, at least they covered "Dropping Your Weapon So You Can Eat Beans and Get Yourself Shot".
Tracey: Yeah, I got a badge in that. [seriously] Won't happen again.
Zoe: It does, I'm just gonna watch.
. . .
Zoe: First rule of battle, little one… don't ever let them know where you are.
[Cut to Mal, firing behind himself as he runs toward the two.]
Mal: WHOO-HOO! I'M RIGHT HERE! I'M RIGHT HERE! YOU WANT SOME O' ME?! YEAH YOU DO! COME ON! COME ON! AAAAAH!
[He lands with a grunt behind some nearby rubble.]
Mal: Whoo-hoo!
Zoe: 'Course, there're other schools of thought.
TV Show: Firefly
Mal: Tracey, ain't you dead yet?
Tracey: Through no fault of my own, Sarge.
Mal: Aw... I really wanted your beans.
Tracey: Through no fault of my own, Sarge.
Mal: Aw... I really wanted your beans.
TV Show: Firefly
Mal: Everybody dies, Tracey. Someone's carryin' a bullet for you right now, doesn't even know it. The trick is, die of old age before it finds you.
TV Show: Firefly
Jayne: We're taking him on board?
Mal: We are.
Jayne: Don't know if I see the percentage in that.
Mal: Then don't strain your brain trying. You might break something.
Mal: We are.
Jayne: Don't know if I see the percentage in that.
Mal: Then don't strain your brain trying. You might break something.
TV Show: Firefly
[The crew listens to Tracey's recorded message.]
Tracey: Uh, okay. Uh, recording. Hi, I guess. This is a message for Zoe, and for Malcolm Reynolds. And I really hope you all are the ones listening to it. I'll spare you the boring details. I've fallen in with untrustworthy folk. Makin' a bunch of bad calls. All that matters is... I expect to be shuffled off. And you two are the only people I trust to get me where I'm going, which is home. I'd like my body to be with my folks on St. Albans. We got the family plot there, and my Mom and Dad, well, they deserve to know I died. You know, it's funny. We went to the war never lookin' to come back, but it's... it's the real world I couldn't survive. You two carried me through that war. Now I need you to carry me just a little bit further… if you can. Tell my folks I wanted to do right by them, and that I'm at peace, and all. Uh… When you can't run anymore, you crawl, and when you can't do that, well… Yeah, you know the rest. Thanks, b-both of you. Oh, yeah, and, uh... make sure my eyes is closed, will ya?
Tracey: Uh, okay. Uh, recording. Hi, I guess. This is a message for Zoe, and for Malcolm Reynolds. And I really hope you all are the ones listening to it. I'll spare you the boring details. I've fallen in with untrustworthy folk. Makin' a bunch of bad calls. All that matters is... I expect to be shuffled off. And you two are the only people I trust to get me where I'm going, which is home. I'd like my body to be with my folks on St. Albans. We got the family plot there, and my Mom and Dad, well, they deserve to know I died. You know, it's funny. We went to the war never lookin' to come back, but it's... it's the real world I couldn't survive. You two carried me through that war. Now I need you to carry me just a little bit further… if you can. Tell my folks I wanted to do right by them, and that I'm at peace, and all. Uh… When you can't run anymore, you crawl, and when you can't do that, well… Yeah, you know the rest. Thanks, b-both of you. Oh, yeah, and, uh... make sure my eyes is closed, will ya?
TV Show: Firefly
[A menacing man scares information about Serenity out of postal clerk Amnon, then chuckles.]
Womack: Relax! You've been great. And I was just bluffing with that stuff about arresting you. I mean, who needs that kind of paperwork? Skunk, light him on fire.
Womack: Relax! You've been great. And I was just bluffing with that stuff about arresting you. I mean, who needs that kind of paperwork? Skunk, light him on fire.
TV Show: Firefly
[Mal, Inara and Zoe are gathered around the table, laughing.]
Mal: I thought I was gonna die.
Inara: How could he possibly—
Mal: Oh, the colonel was dead drunk. Three hours pissin' on about the enlisted men. Uh, "they're scum", uh, "they're not fighters", and, uh... and then he passed right out—boom.
Zoe: We couldn't even move him. So, uh, Tracey just... snipped it right off his face.
Mal: And you never seen a man more proud of his moustache than Colonel Obrin. I mean, in all my life, I will never love a woman the way this officer loved that lip ferret.
Zoe: Big, walrus-y thing—all waxed up!
Inara: Did he find out?
Mal: Oh! Next mornin', he wakes up, it's gone, and he is furious! But he can't just say, you know, "Someone stole my moustache!" So he, uh, calls together all the platoons…
Zoe: We thought he was gonna shoot us!
Mal: ...and, uh... Oh, he's eye-ballin' all the men somethin' fierce. Not a word. And he comes up to Tracey, and Tracey's wearing the gorram thing on his face!
Zoe: He'd glued it on!
Mal: He's starin' the old man down wearing his own damn moustache!
Mal: I thought I was gonna die.
Inara: How could he possibly—
Mal: Oh, the colonel was dead drunk. Three hours pissin' on about the enlisted men. Uh, "they're scum", uh, "they're not fighters", and, uh... and then he passed right out—boom.
Zoe: We couldn't even move him. So, uh, Tracey just... snipped it right off his face.
Mal: And you never seen a man more proud of his moustache than Colonel Obrin. I mean, in all my life, I will never love a woman the way this officer loved that lip ferret.
Zoe: Big, walrus-y thing—all waxed up!
Inara: Did he find out?
Mal: Oh! Next mornin', he wakes up, it's gone, and he is furious! But he can't just say, you know, "Someone stole my moustache!" So he, uh, calls together all the platoons…
Zoe: We thought he was gonna shoot us!
Mal: ...and, uh... Oh, he's eye-ballin' all the men somethin' fierce. Not a word. And he comes up to Tracey, and Tracey's wearing the gorram thing on his face!
Zoe: He'd glued it on!
Mal: He's starin' the old man down wearing his own damn moustache!
TV Show: Firefly
[As Simon starts an autopsy on Tracey's body, the man screams and starts thrashing about.]
Jayne: Spry for a dead fella!
. . .
[Mal manages to pin Tracey to the floor, straddling him.]
Tracey: Sarge?
Mal: Yeah?
Tracey: I think I'm naked.
. . .
Mal: You wanna explain to me exactly why you got yourself all corpsified and mailed to me?
Jayne: Spry for a dead fella!
. . .
[Mal manages to pin Tracey to the floor, straddling him.]
Tracey: Sarge?
Mal: Yeah?
Tracey: I think I'm naked.
. . .
Mal: You wanna explain to me exactly why you got yourself all corpsified and mailed to me?
TV Show: Firefly
[The crew walks onto the bridge followed by Tracey.]
Wash: I think they're about done being stalled to— ahhhh... AHHHHHHH! Mal, your dead army buddy's on the bridge.
Zoe: He ain't dead.
Wash: ...Oh...
Wash: I think they're about done being stalled to— ahhhh... AHHHHHHH! Mal, your dead army buddy's on the bridge.
Zoe: He ain't dead.
Wash: ...Oh...
TV Show: Firefly
[Mal and Wash are attempting to stall Womack, who is pursuing them.]
Womack: I'm a dangerous-minded man on a ship loaded with hurt. Now why you got me chattin' with your peons?
Womack: I'm a dangerous-minded man on a ship loaded with hurt. Now why you got me chattin' with your peons?
TV Show: Firefly
[Wash is flying through the canyon with debris falling onto the ship, Mal isn't flying comfortable.]
Wash: Woo! This kind of flying really wakes up a guy!
Mal: Awake helps.
Wash: Woo! This kind of flying really wakes up a guy!
Mal: Awake helps.
TV Show: Firefly
[Wash is perilously flying through a narrow canyon trying to evade Womack.]
Wash: They'd have to be insane to follow us through here.
[After flying through the canyon some time, Wash looks behind them to see if they've lost Womack.]
Wash: They're not behind us any more!
[Looks up and realizes Womack is simply following them from above the canyon.]
Wash: I didn't think of that.
Wash: They'd have to be insane to follow us through here.
[After flying through the canyon some time, Wash looks behind them to see if they've lost Womack.]
Wash: They're not behind us any more!
[Looks up and realizes Womack is simply following them from above the canyon.]
Wash: I didn't think of that.
TV Show: Firefly
[Tracey is holding Kaylee at gunpoint when the bombardment stops.]
Mal: Hear that quiet? Means the call's already been made.
Tracey: Well, that call… that call means you just murdered me.
[Behind him, Jayne cocks his rifle. As Tracey spins, Mal shoots him.]
Mal: No, son. You murdered yourself. I just carried the bullet a while.
Mal: Hear that quiet? Means the call's already been made.
Tracey: Well, that call… that call means you just murdered me.
[Behind him, Jayne cocks his rifle. As Tracey spins, Mal shoots him.]
Mal: No, son. You murdered yourself. I just carried the bullet a while.
TV Show: Firefly
[As Tracey lies dying, the ex-soldiers finally complete the old saying.]
Tracey: When you can't run, you crawl. And when you can't crawl, when you can't do that...
Zoe: ...you find someone to carry you.
Tracey: When you can't run, you crawl. And when you can't crawl, when you can't do that...
Zoe: ...you find someone to carry you.
TV Show: Firefly
[Mal practices cocking and aiming his gun in the dining area when Inara comes up behind him.]
Inara: Hi.
Mal: BWAH!
Inara: [laughing] Sorry! Didn't mean to startle.
Mal: You didn't! I was just, uh… "BWAH!" That's more like a… It's a warrior like... Strikes fear into the… hearts of… You know, not altogether wise, sneaking up on a fellow when he's handling his weapon.
Inara: I'm sure I've heard that said. But… perhaps the dining area isn't the place for this sort of thing.
Mal: What do ya mean? It's the only place with a table big enough.
Inara: Of course. In that case, every well-bred petty crook knows that the small concealable weapons always go to the far left of the place setting.
. . .
[Inara departs. Mal melodramatically draws his gun.]
Mal: Bwah.
Inara: Hi.
Mal: BWAH!
Inara: [laughing] Sorry! Didn't mean to startle.
Mal: You didn't! I was just, uh… "BWAH!" That's more like a… It's a warrior like... Strikes fear into the… hearts of… You know, not altogether wise, sneaking up on a fellow when he's handling his weapon.
Inara: I'm sure I've heard that said. But… perhaps the dining area isn't the place for this sort of thing.
Mal: What do ya mean? It's the only place with a table big enough.
Inara: Of course. In that case, every well-bred petty crook knows that the small concealable weapons always go to the far left of the place setting.
. . .
[Inara departs. Mal melodramatically draws his gun.]
Mal: Bwah.
TV Show: Firefly
[Inara answers Nandi's vid-transmitted appeal.]
Inara: It sounds like something this crew can handle. I can't guarantee they'll handle it particularly well, but...
Nandi: If they got guns and brains at all.
Inara: They've got guns...
. . .
[After Inara signs off]
Inara: I suppose you heard most of that?
Mal: Only because I was eavesdropping.
. . .
Inara: I'll contact Nandi at once, but you will be paid. I feel it's important that we keep ours... strictly a business arrangement.
Inara: It sounds like something this crew can handle. I can't guarantee they'll handle it particularly well, but...
Nandi: If they got guns and brains at all.
Inara: They've got guns...
. . .
[After Inara signs off]
Inara: I suppose you heard most of that?
Mal: Only because I was eavesdropping.
. . .
Inara: I'll contact Nandi at once, but you will be paid. I feel it's important that we keep ours... strictly a business arrangement.
TV Show: Firefly
Jayne: Don't much see the benefit in getting involved in strangers' troubles without a up-front price negotiated.
Book: These people need assistance. The benefit wouldn't necessarily be for you.
Jayne: That's what I'm sayin'.
Zoe: No one's gonna force you to go, Jayne. As has been stated, this job is strictly speculative.
Jayne: Good! Don't know these folks, don't much care to.
Mal: They're whores.
Jayne: I'm in.
Book: These people need assistance. The benefit wouldn't necessarily be for you.
Jayne: That's what I'm sayin'.
Zoe: No one's gonna force you to go, Jayne. As has been stated, this job is strictly speculative.
Jayne: Good! Don't know these folks, don't much care to.
Mal: They're whores.
Jayne: I'm in.
TV Show: Firefly
Inara: Nandi, this is Malcolm Reynolds.
Nandi: I appreciate your coming.
Mal: Well, any friend of Inara's is a strictly businesslike relationship of mine.
. . .
Mal: I'll introduce you to the rest later. They're good folk.
Jayne: Can I start getting sexed already?
Mal: Well, that one's kinda horrific.
Nandi: I appreciate your coming.
Mal: Well, any friend of Inara's is a strictly businesslike relationship of mine.
. . .
Mal: I'll introduce you to the rest later. They're good folk.
Jayne: Can I start getting sexed already?
Mal: Well, that one's kinda horrific.
TV Show: Firefly
Kaylee: Look, they got boy whores! Isn't that thoughtful? Wonder if they service girlfolk at all.
TV Show: Firefly
Simon: Isn't there a pregnant woman I'm to examine?
Wash: [to Kaylee] You'd really lie with someone being paid for it?
Kaylee: Well, it's not like anyone else is lining up to, you know, examine me.
Jayne: Whoop! My John Thomas is about to pop off and fly around the room, there's so much tasty here. Ooh!
Wash: Would be you get your most poetical about your pecker.
Wash: [to Kaylee] You'd really lie with someone being paid for it?
Kaylee: Well, it's not like anyone else is lining up to, you know, examine me.
Jayne: Whoop! My John Thomas is about to pop off and fly around the room, there's so much tasty here. Ooh!
Wash: Would be you get your most poetical about your pecker.
TV Show: Firefly
Kaylee: Everyone's got somebody. Wash, tell me I'm pretty.
Wash: Were I unwed, I would take you in a manly fashion.
Kaylee: 'Cause I'm pretty?
Wash: 'Cause you're pretty.
Wash: Were I unwed, I would take you in a manly fashion.
Kaylee: 'Cause I'm pretty?
Wash: 'Cause you're pretty.
TV Show: Firefly
Mal: Inara, think you could stoop to being on my arm?
Inara: Will you wash it first?
Inara: Will you wash it first?
TV Show: Firefly
Mal: Nothing worse than a monster who thinks he's right with God.
. . .
Nandi: Captain Reynolds, it took me years to cut this piece of territory out of other men's hands, to build this business up from nothing.
Mal: Nandi...
Nandi: It's who I am, and it's my home. I'm not going anywhere.
. . .
Mal: Well, lady, I must say—you're my kinda stupid.
. . .
Nandi: Captain Reynolds, it took me years to cut this piece of territory out of other men's hands, to build this business up from nothing.
Mal: Nandi...
Nandi: It's who I am, and it's my home. I'm not going anywhere.
. . .
Mal: Well, lady, I must say—you're my kinda stupid.
TV Show: Firefly
Wash: Well, I'm not sure now is the best time to bring a tiny little helpless person into our lives.
Zoe: That excuse is gettin' a little worn, honey.
Wash: It's not an excuse, dear! It's objective assessment. I can't help that it stays relevant.
Zoe: I don't give a good gorram about relevant, Wash, or objective. And I ain't so afraid of losing something that I ain't gonna try to have it. [tenderly] You and I would make one beautiful baby. And I want to meet that child one day. Period.
Zoe: That excuse is gettin' a little worn, honey.
Wash: It's not an excuse, dear! It's objective assessment. I can't help that it stays relevant.
Zoe: I don't give a good gorram about relevant, Wash, or objective. And I ain't so afraid of losing something that I ain't gonna try to have it. [tenderly] You and I would make one beautiful baby. And I want to meet that child one day. Period.
TV Show: Firefly
Nandi: Truth is, I expected a whole lot more of you to be takin' payment in our trade.
Mal: Well, we're an odd conglomeration. Got a preacher, a married fellah, and the doctor... well, he'd have to... relax for thirty seconds to get his play. That'd be more or less a miracle.
Mal: Well, we're an odd conglomeration. Got a preacher, a married fellah, and the doctor... well, he'd have to... relax for thirty seconds to get his play. That'd be more or less a miracle.
TV Show: Firefly
[Simon and Inara tend to Petaline during her contractions. River waits at her feet like a catcher.]
Inara: How many babies have you actually delivered?
Simon: As the primary? This would be the first. You?
Inara: My first, too.
River: Mine, too.
. . .
River: Who do you think is in there?
Inara: How many babies have you actually delivered?
Simon: As the primary? This would be the first. You?
Inara: My first, too.
River: Mine, too.
. . .
River: Who do you think is in there?
TV Show: Firefly
Mal: Miss Nandi, I have a confession to make.
Nandi: Maybe I should get the Shepherd.
Mal: Well, I ain't sinned yet. And I'd feel a little more'n awkward if he were here when I did.
. . .
Nandi: Malcolm, I been waiting for you to kiss me since I showed you my guns.
[Mal kisses Nandi, then draws back for a moment.]
Nandi: You okay with this?
Mal: I'm just waiting to see if I pass out. Long story.
Nandi: Maybe I should get the Shepherd.
Mal: Well, I ain't sinned yet. And I'd feel a little more'n awkward if he were here when I did.
. . .
Nandi: Malcolm, I been waiting for you to kiss me since I showed you my guns.
[Mal kisses Nandi, then draws back for a moment.]
Nandi: You okay with this?
Mal: I'm just waiting to see if I pass out. Long story.
TV Show: Firefly