Friends Quotes
Monica: Joey, did you even interview this woman before you asked her to move in?
Joey: Of course I did.
Monica: What exactly did you ask her?
Joey: "When can you move in?"
Joey: Of course I did.
Monica: What exactly did you ask her?
Joey: "When can you move in?"
TV Show: Friends
Phoebe: Me, I'm more free. You know, I run like I did when I was a kid because that's the only way it's fun. You know? I mean, didn't you even run so fast you thought your legs were gonna fall off? You know, like when you were running towards the swings, or running away from Satan?
[Rachel looks confused.]
Phoebe: The neighbor's dog.
[Rachel looks confused.]
Phoebe: The neighbor's dog.
TV Show: Friends
Monica: Honey, that's a great idea nailing your boxes to the floor !
Chandler: I didn't nail my boxes to the floor.
Monica: Oh so you can move them !
Chandler: I didn't nail my boxes to the floor.
Monica: Oh so you can move them !
TV Show: Friends
Chandler: [offering Joey a game of Playstation] Hi, my name's Chandler! I just moved in next door, and I was wondering if you'd be interested in battling me in a post-apocalyptic world for control of the galaxy's last remaining energy source.
Joey: Sure.
Joey: Sure.
TV Show: Friends
Rachel: (Refers her boss Kim) She doesn't like me very much.
Chandler: That's great. Because my boss doesn't like me either.
Monica: My boss doesn't like me either.
Ross: Maybe it's like a universal thing.
Joey: Or maybe because you're all hanging around here at 11: 30 on a Wednesday.
All others: (In chorus) Let's get off to work...
Chandler: That's great. Because my boss doesn't like me either.
Monica: My boss doesn't like me either.
Ross: Maybe it's like a universal thing.
Joey: Or maybe because you're all hanging around here at 11: 30 on a Wednesday.
All others: (In chorus) Let's get off to work...
TV Show: Friends
Joey: You're gonna cook something?
Rachel: Hey, I cook!
Chandler: Offering people gum is not cooking.
Rachel: Hey, I cook!
Chandler: Offering people gum is not cooking.
TV Show: Friends
[On tasting Rachel's English trifle/Shepherd's pie]
Ross: It tastes like feet!
Joey: I like it!
Ross: Are you serious?
Joey: What's not to like? Custard, good. Jam, good. Beef, GOOD!
Ross: It tastes like feet!
Joey: I like it!
Ross: Are you serious?
Joey: What's not to like? Custard, good. Jam, good. Beef, GOOD!
TV Show: Friends
Ross: And that's the story of the dreidel. Now, some people trace the Christmas tree back to the Egyptians, who used to bring green palm branches into their huts on the shortest day of the year, symbolizing life's triumph over death. And that was, like, four thousand years ago.
Rachel: So, pretty much around the same time that you started telling this story.
Rachel: So, pretty much around the same time that you started telling this story.
TV Show: Friends
Phoebe: [to Ross] You bought your sheets at a flea market? Come on, Ross, you gotta loosen the pursestrings a little!
TV Show: Friends
Monica: [to Janine] You know, you're not so quiet yourself, missy!
Chandler: [to Janine] And I'm blah? Listen, the only thing more boring than watching modern dance is having to listen to you talk about it! [in a bad Australian accent] "Oh, Chandler, I just lost myself in the movement!"
Chandler: [to Janine] And I'm blah? Listen, the only thing more boring than watching modern dance is having to listen to you talk about it! [in a bad Australian accent] "Oh, Chandler, I just lost myself in the movement!"
TV Show: Friends
Phoebe: I didn't know Playboy prints jokes.
Ross: Yeah, they print jokes, interviews, hard-hitting journalism. It's not just about the pictures!
Monica: It didn't work on Mom. It's not going to work on us.
[Joey walks in]
Ross: Hey, Joey, look — Playboy printed my joke!
Joey: [Joey reads it and makes a slight chuckle] Whoa, whoa, whoa! Jokes? But... You guys know they have naked chicks in there, right?
Ross: Yeah, they print jokes, interviews, hard-hitting journalism. It's not just about the pictures!
Monica: It didn't work on Mom. It's not going to work on us.
[Joey walks in]
Ross: Hey, Joey, look — Playboy printed my joke!
Joey: [Joey reads it and makes a slight chuckle] Whoa, whoa, whoa! Jokes? But... You guys know they have naked chicks in there, right?
TV Show: Friends
Joey: Altogether, It's $12.75 .
Chandler: This coming from the man who couldn't split our $80 phone bill in half.
Chandler: This coming from the man who couldn't split our $80 phone bill in half.
TV Show: Friends
[Rachel Introducing her sister to everyone.]
Rachel: That's Joey.
Joey: How you doin ?
Rachel: DON'T !!!!!
Rachel: That's Joey.
Joey: How you doin ?
Rachel: DON'T !!!!!
TV Show: Friends
Rachel: Honey ! What did you do that bad that make dad cut you off ?
Jill: Okay.. I bought a boat.
Phoebe: You bought a boat ?
Jill: Yeah. It wasn't for me. It was for a friend.
Chandler: Boy ! Did we make friends with wrong sister ?
Jill: Okay.. I bought a boat.
Phoebe: You bought a boat ?
Jill: Yeah. It wasn't for me. It was for a friend.
Chandler: Boy ! Did we make friends with wrong sister ?
TV Show: Friends
Phoebe: Seriously, Rachel's not gonna think it's a good idea.
Jill: So who made her Queen of the World ?
Phoebe: I would love that Job .
Jill: So who made her Queen of the World ?
Phoebe: I would love that Job .
TV Show: Friends
Joey: I can't believe Ross went out with Rachel's sister! When Chandler made out with my sister, I was mad at him for ten years.
Chandler: That was, like, five years ago.
Joey: Yeah, you got five years left!
Chandler: Joey —
Joey: You wanna make it six?
Chandler: That was, like, five years ago.
Joey: Yeah, you got five years left!
Chandler: Joey —
Joey: You wanna make it six?
TV Show: Friends
[While watching Phoebe's porn video]
Joey: You sick bastards.
Rachel: It's a tattoo. That's weird, Pheebs...wait, that's Ursula! That's not Phoebe, that's Ursula!
[Joey turns to watch the tape.]
Joey: Wait! Wait! Then I can watch that. Rewind it! Rewind it!
[Phoebe arrives.]
Phoebe: Hey, what's up? Oh my God! What am I doing?
Joey: You sick bastards.
Rachel: It's a tattoo. That's weird, Pheebs...wait, that's Ursula! That's not Phoebe, that's Ursula!
[Joey turns to watch the tape.]
Joey: Wait! Wait! Then I can watch that. Rewind it! Rewind it!
[Phoebe arrives.]
Phoebe: Hey, what's up? Oh my God! What am I doing?
TV Show: Friends
[In reference to Phoebe doing porn.]
Monica: Well, I guess it makes sense, you know, having such a terrible childhood.
Chandler: I had a terrible childhood and I don't do porn.
Monica: Yes, but you're dead inside.
Monica: Well, I guess it makes sense, you know, having such a terrible childhood.
Chandler: I had a terrible childhood and I don't do porn.
Monica: Yes, but you're dead inside.
TV Show: Friends
Rachel: Hey, you guys! Guess what? Barry and Mindy are getting a divorce.
?Joey: (looking at Ross) What is the matter with you?!?
Phoebe: No, Barry and Mindy.
?Joey: Oh, sorry. I hear "divorce," I immediately go to Ross.
?Joey: (looking at Ross) What is the matter with you?!?
Phoebe: No, Barry and Mindy.
?Joey: Oh, sorry. I hear "divorce," I immediately go to Ross.
TV Show: Friends
Chandler: I always thought having a heart attack was nature's way of telling you to die!
[Phoebe stares at him angrily.]
Chandler: But you're not gonna die... I mean... you — you are going to die, but you're not gonna die today... I wish I was dead.
[Phoebe stares at him angrily.]
Chandler: But you're not gonna die... I mean... you — you are going to die, but you're not gonna die today... I wish I was dead.
TV Show: Friends
Chandler[imitating Roger]: "Here's some little-known facts about couscous: they didn't add the second cous until 1979."
TV Show: Friends
Ross: I studied ka-ra-te for a long time, and there's a concept you should really be familiar with. It's what the Japanese call unagi.
Rachel: Isn't that a kind of sushi?
Ross: No, it's a concep—
Phoebe: Yeah, it is, it is. It's freshwater eel.
Ross: Okay, maybe it means that, too.
Rachel: Isn't that a kind of sushi?
Ross: No, it's a concep—
Phoebe: Yeah, it is, it is. It's freshwater eel.
Ross: Okay, maybe it means that, too.
TV Show: Friends
Ross: Unagi is a state of total awareness. Only by achieving true unagi can you be prepared for any danger that may befall you.
Phoebe: You mean, in case someone's trying to steal your bamboo sleeping mat or your kettle of fish?
Phoebe: You mean, in case someone's trying to steal your bamboo sleeping mat or your kettle of fish?
TV Show: Friends
Chandler: Ah, "Hotties of the Paleontology Department." There's a big-selling calendar, eh?
TV Show: Friends
Joey: Now listen, the last day of auditions is Thursday. Okay? So I gotta get in there by Thursday. Okay? Just remember Thursday. Thursday. Can you remember Thursday?
Chandler: [mockingly] Yeah. So, Tuesday?
Joey: Thursday! Look, if you need help remembering, think of it like this: the third day. All right? Monday, one day. Tuesday, two day. Wednesday, when? Huh? What day? Thursday! The third day! Okay?
Chandler: Thank you.
Chandler: [mockingly] Yeah. So, Tuesday?
Joey: Thursday! Look, if you need help remembering, think of it like this: the third day. All right? Monday, one day. Tuesday, two day. Wednesday, when? Huh? What day? Thursday! The third day! Okay?
Chandler: Thank you.
TV Show: Friends
Chandler: You don't look good, Joe.
Joey: The fridge broke, so I had to eat everything. Cold cuts, ice cream, limes. Oh, and what was in that brown jar?
Chandler: That's still in there?
Joey: Not any more. By the way, you owe me $400.
Chandler: Is this a service you're providing me?
Joey: The fridge broke, so I had to eat everything. Cold cuts, ice cream, limes. Oh, and what was in that brown jar?
Chandler: That's still in there?
Joey: Not any more. By the way, you owe me $400.
Chandler: Is this a service you're providing me?
TV Show: Friends
[Phoebe shows what her guy has for Rachel]:
Phoebe: And he has one of these. [Phoebe imitates a chin dimple]
Chandler: A face ass?
Phoebe: And he has one of these. [Phoebe imitates a chin dimple]
Chandler: A face ass?
TV Show: Friends