How I Met Your Mother Quotes
[Ted has just asked Marshall and Lily to set him up with a potential wife]
Marshall: You want us to arrange your marriage?
Ted: Absolutely! Look, there are two sides to dating - picking and getting picked. Getting picked I'm good at. Ladies love Teddy Westside.
Marshall: You're waiting for me to comment on your 'self-assigned nickname.' [Pause] Well here's my comment: I LOVE IT!
Ted: Really?
Marshall: Teddy Westside? Continue!
Ted: It’s the picking I suck at, I pick the wrong girls! But you guys are the best pickers I know. You picked each other!
Marshall: You want us to arrange your marriage?
Ted: Absolutely! Look, there are two sides to dating - picking and getting picked. Getting picked I'm good at. Ladies love Teddy Westside.
Marshall: You're waiting for me to comment on your 'self-assigned nickname.' [Pause] Well here's my comment: I LOVE IT!
Ted: Really?
Marshall: Teddy Westside? Continue!
Ted: It’s the picking I suck at, I pick the wrong girls! But you guys are the best pickers I know. You picked each other!
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
Barney: [to Ted] Dude, ditch Tiffany and join the Barnacle in the Pharma Girl free-for-all. Side effects may include: loss of clothing, rug burns, shortness of breath and sore abdominals the next morning. WHAT IN THE WORLD IS UP! [Hand up in the air waiting for a high-five from Ted]
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
Robin: Dude, I'm a girl, OK? Our girl parts are like a spider web; sometimes you're gonna catch stuff you don't want!
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Barney visits Robin at the shooting range after Lily reveals to him Robin's post-breakup depression]
Barney: Hey.
Robin: [sees Barney and takes off earplugs, still sad] What's up? Thought you were going on some big date.
Barney: Robin, I know you're upset.
Robin: What? No, I have I've never been happier, and this Anita sounds lovely. I'm so glad that the two of you just randomly happened to find each other. [angry tone] It just warms my frickin' heart! [returns to pistol and fires again without earplugs, deafening Barney. Robin throws away pistol when she's out of rounds and catches breath]
Barney: So you're not upset?
Robin: Of course, I'm upset, Barney. Don't you see how constantly talking about your conquests makes me feel like I'm just another number to you?
Barney: But you're not just another number to me.
Robin: And now, you're taking Anita, who you barely know, on this amazing date, when I never got treated that way. It just, it just sucks, that's all, it just sucks. [pause]
Barney: Wow, I knew I was bad at being a boyfriend, but I had no idea I'd be so much worse at being an ex-boyfriend. I'm sorry. What can I do to make it up to you?
Robin: Nothing, Barney. You've already proven I'm not important.
Barney: Stop that, I'm serious. Ask me for anything.
Robin: Ok, don't sleep with Anita.
Barney: Done.
Robin: Barney, of course you're going to sleep with her. Why else would you be taking her on this superdate?
Barney: She's not going on this superdate, Robin. You are.
Barney: Hey.
Robin: [sees Barney and takes off earplugs, still sad] What's up? Thought you were going on some big date.
Barney: Robin, I know you're upset.
Robin: What? No, I have I've never been happier, and this Anita sounds lovely. I'm so glad that the two of you just randomly happened to find each other. [angry tone] It just warms my frickin' heart! [returns to pistol and fires again without earplugs, deafening Barney. Robin throws away pistol when she's out of rounds and catches breath]
Barney: So you're not upset?
Robin: Of course, I'm upset, Barney. Don't you see how constantly talking about your conquests makes me feel like I'm just another number to you?
Barney: But you're not just another number to me.
Robin: And now, you're taking Anita, who you barely know, on this amazing date, when I never got treated that way. It just, it just sucks, that's all, it just sucks. [pause]
Barney: Wow, I knew I was bad at being a boyfriend, but I had no idea I'd be so much worse at being an ex-boyfriend. I'm sorry. What can I do to make it up to you?
Robin: Nothing, Barney. You've already proven I'm not important.
Barney: Stop that, I'm serious. Ask me for anything.
Robin: Ok, don't sleep with Anita.
Barney: Done.
Robin: Barney, of course you're going to sleep with her. Why else would you be taking her on this superdate?
Barney: She's not going on this superdate, Robin. You are.
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
Barney: [About something the happened the previous night] I couldn't be more unhappy! I mean she just walked out. At least when I walk out on a girl I have the common courtesy to sleep with her first. It's-it's called manners!
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Barney brags about his usual picture pose]
Barney: I always look drop dead, stone-cold amazing...unlike Marshall, who just looks dead, stoned, and cold.
Barney: I always look drop dead, stone-cold amazing...unlike Marshall, who just looks dead, stoned, and cold.
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Marshall is livid that Amanda wrote Lily's age and name wrong in her birthday cake]
Marshall: 42nd? Does this [gestures to Lily] hot piece of ass look 42 to you? Or does she look like her name is Lori?
Lily: No Marshall, it's okay.
Marshall: No Lily it's not okay! Ted, get this stranger out of my house.
Amanda: I'm so sorry..
Marshall: OUT!! [points thumb at door]
Marshall: 42nd? Does this [gestures to Lily] hot piece of ass look 42 to you? Or does she look like her name is Lori?
Lily: No Marshall, it's okay.
Marshall: No Lily it's not okay! Ted, get this stranger out of my house.
Amanda: I'm so sorry..
Marshall: OUT!! [points thumb at door]
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Barney defines lie]
Barney: A lie is just a great story that someone ruined with the truth.
Barney: A lie is just a great story that someone ruined with the truth.
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[knock at the door]
Lily: Oh, that's the pizza. Baby, do you have any cash?
Marshall: Oh, you know I, uh, actually I don't, uh, think that I should...have to pay. 'Cause I'm...not a fan of pizza.
[Stunned gasps]
Robin: What?!?
Ted: Marshall, we've driven halfway across the country for a piece of pizza literally hundreds of times.
Lily: I once caught you eating pizza in the shower!
Arthur The Pizza Guy: Marshall, there's a cartoon of you on our coupons.
Barney: I'm not saying Marshall's a guy who likes pizza, but last time he went in for a physical, doctor says 'Marshall you've gotta stop eating pizza.' Marshall says 'Why?' Doc says 'So I can examine you!' But seriously, we kid because we love.
Marshall: All right, look, the reason that I don't have any money on me is because...I got mugged. [long pause] Can somebody please pay Arthur, all right? I'm starving!! [to Arthur, kindly] How's your dad by the way?
Arthur: Better.
Marshall: Good!
Lily: Oh, that's the pizza. Baby, do you have any cash?
Marshall: Oh, you know I, uh, actually I don't, uh, think that I should...have to pay. 'Cause I'm...not a fan of pizza.
[Stunned gasps]
Robin: What?!?
Ted: Marshall, we've driven halfway across the country for a piece of pizza literally hundreds of times.
Lily: I once caught you eating pizza in the shower!
Arthur The Pizza Guy: Marshall, there's a cartoon of you on our coupons.
Barney: I'm not saying Marshall's a guy who likes pizza, but last time he went in for a physical, doctor says 'Marshall you've gotta stop eating pizza.' Marshall says 'Why?' Doc says 'So I can examine you!' But seriously, we kid because we love.
Marshall: All right, look, the reason that I don't have any money on me is because...I got mugged. [long pause] Can somebody please pay Arthur, all right? I'm starving!! [to Arthur, kindly] How's your dad by the way?
Arthur: Better.
Marshall: Good!
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Ted chances upon Marshall grilling sausages in the decrepit house he just bought]
Ted: How'd you know I was going to be up here?
Marshall: Robin told me. [gives Ted a beer] Happy housewarming.
Ted: But the last time I saw you, I told you I was selling the place.
Marshall: I know what you said, but [walks with Ted to steps of patio] I also know my friend, Ted Mosby. [they sit] Of all the times I told you, "slow down, don't go too fast into things with this girl," you never even listened to me a single damned time. Your heart is both drunk and a kid.
Ted: Thanks for sticking out to me, man.
Marshall: That's what I'd do.
Ted: Can I show you some of the ideas that I have?
Marshall: Yeah. [they stand up and head back to house, where Ted begins to explain everything]
Future Ted: And kids, Marshall was right. I didn't give up on my dream house, because that's the thing about stupid decisions - we all make them, but time is funny and sometimes a little magical. It can take a stupid decision, and turn it into something else entirely. Because kids, as you know, that house...is this house.
Ted: How'd you know I was going to be up here?
Marshall: Robin told me. [gives Ted a beer] Happy housewarming.
Ted: But the last time I saw you, I told you I was selling the place.
Marshall: I know what you said, but [walks with Ted to steps of patio] I also know my friend, Ted Mosby. [they sit] Of all the times I told you, "slow down, don't go too fast into things with this girl," you never even listened to me a single damned time. Your heart is both drunk and a kid.
Ted: Thanks for sticking out to me, man.
Marshall: That's what I'd do.
Ted: Can I show you some of the ideas that I have?
Marshall: Yeah. [they stand up and head back to house, where Ted begins to explain everything]
Future Ted: And kids, Marshall was right. I didn't give up on my dream house, because that's the thing about stupid decisions - we all make them, but time is funny and sometimes a little magical. It can take a stupid decision, and turn it into something else entirely. Because kids, as you know, that house...is this house.
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
Barney: Robin Stinson.
Ted: Robin Mosby.
Barney: Robin Stinson.
Ted: Ted Scherbatsky! I'll take her name, I don't care!
Barney: Okay wait. How about this we share her. I'll take her until she's forty and you can have her after that
Ted: Who are we kidding. She's with Don now. We just have to accept that and move on
Barney: You're right. I'm gonna go to the bathroom and then skid out.
Ted: Robin Mosby.
Barney: Robin Stinson.
Ted: Ted Scherbatsky! I'll take her name, I don't care!
Barney: Okay wait. How about this we share her. I'll take her until she's forty and you can have her after that
Ted: Who are we kidding. She's with Don now. We just have to accept that and move on
Barney: You're right. I'm gonna go to the bathroom and then skid out.
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
Jefferson van Smooth: Young man, that gong is a 500-year-old relic that hasn't been struck since W. S. Gilbert hit it at the London premiere of The Mikado in 1885!
Marshall: His wife's a 500-year-old relic that hasn't been struck since W. S. Gilbert hit it at the London premiere of The Mikado in 1885!
Marshall: His wife's a 500-year-old relic that hasn't been struck since W. S. Gilbert hit it at the London premiere of The Mikado in 1885!
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[At the Wedding Bride's wedding scene, a kid kicks Jed Mosely]
Kid: Take that, Ted Mosby!
Ted: Okay, he definitely said it that time.
Kid: Take that, Ted Mosby!
Ted: Okay, he definitely said it that time.
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Marshall and Lily imagine what if they told the gang about their plans for a baby]
Barney: [opens door] You guys bangin'?
Marshall and Lily: Whaaaaaa!
Barney: Just for the record, having a baby? Huge mistake. Now show me what you've got.
Ted: [enters with balloons] Uncle Teddy's here. [Marshall and Lily scream] Quick question. How are you guys going to handle the whole Santa thing? I'm thinking just be honest. Aw, Hell. I'll dress up. [TV turns on, showing Robin. Marshall and Lily scream again]
Robin: This just in... is what Marshall Eriksen is about to say to his wife as he attempts to impregnate her. Chopper 12 is live on the scene with Baby Watch 2010. [Gang sees live footage of helicopter just outside the room's window]
Barney: [opens door] You guys bangin'?
Marshall and Lily: Whaaaaaa!
Barney: Just for the record, having a baby? Huge mistake. Now show me what you've got.
Ted: [enters with balloons] Uncle Teddy's here. [Marshall and Lily scream] Quick question. How are you guys going to handle the whole Santa thing? I'm thinking just be honest. Aw, Hell. I'll dress up. [TV turns on, showing Robin. Marshall and Lily scream again]
Robin: This just in... is what Marshall Eriksen is about to say to his wife as he attempts to impregnate her. Chopper 12 is live on the scene with Baby Watch 2010. [Gang sees live footage of helicopter just outside the room's window]
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Robin is stunned that Don accepted a lead anchor job in Chicago - which she turned down earlier]
Don: Put yourself in my shoes. Can you imagine what it's like to have the phone ring and it's your dream job on the other end?
Robin: [teary-eyed] Yes... I can. Good luck in Chicago, Don. [leaves Don's apartment]
Don: Put yourself in my shoes. Can you imagine what it's like to have the phone ring and it's your dream job on the other end?
Robin: [teary-eyed] Yes... I can. Good luck in Chicago, Don. [leaves Don's apartment]
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Barney has just called dibs on a hot girl Ted asked him to make a short glance at. Ted is not amused]
Ted: You can't call dibs on a girl that I've been sitting here thinking about eventually talking to at some point!
Barney: You never called dibs.
Ted: Dibs were implied!
Barney: "Implied" dibs?
Ted: Yeah.
Barney: Ted, you are spitting on the grave of Sir Walter Dibs, inventor of the dib. It was 1652, the SS Dibs was lost at sea-
Ted: I don't have time for a fake history lesson, so I'll keep [points pen at Barney] this simple: You go over there and talk to that girl, I'll see you in court.
Barney: Who's gonna represent you? Dibs-on-Marshall's-my-lawyer!
Ted: You can't call dibs on a girl that I've been sitting here thinking about eventually talking to at some point!
Barney: You never called dibs.
Ted: Dibs were implied!
Barney: "Implied" dibs?
Ted: Yeah.
Barney: Ted, you are spitting on the grave of Sir Walter Dibs, inventor of the dib. It was 1652, the SS Dibs was lost at sea-
Ted: I don't have time for a fake history lesson, so I'll keep [points pen at Barney] this simple: You go over there and talk to that girl, I'll see you in court.
Barney: Who's gonna represent you? Dibs-on-Marshall's-my-lawyer!
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Lily's caught by surprise at learning that Marshall's parents will live with them in the baby's first three months]
Lily: You know what, Marshall, why don't you have a baby with your Dad?
Marshall: Oh okay, Lily. Why don't you have a baby with your butt?
Lily: What?
Marshall: AAARGH! [stands up] I can't think straight! Why do you have to wear that shirt? [referring to Lily's shirt showing much cleavage] This is NOT HOW I THOUGHT THIS NIGHT WAS GOING TO GO!
Lily: You know what, Marshall, why don't you have a baby with your Dad?
Marshall: Oh okay, Lily. Why don't you have a baby with your butt?
Lily: What?
Marshall: AAARGH! [stands up] I can't think straight! Why do you have to wear that shirt? [referring to Lily's shirt showing much cleavage] This is NOT HOW I THOUGHT THIS NIGHT WAS GOING TO GO!
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Inside the Move This truck on the way to Sam Gibbs' house, Ted and Robin discuss how to market him to a blind date.]
Ted: [to Robin typing on Blackberry] Ted Mosby is solid as a rock. No, dependable. No, rugged. No-
Robin: Why don't I go to the Chevy website and copy down the adjectives?
Ted: I just want to hit that perfect middle ground.
Robin: How about if we just go wildly to both extremes and let them balance each other out? [reads message] "Ted Mosby is really handsome but extremely violent and really rich, but lacks bladder control-" [truck hits bump; Ted and Robin are jolted] Oh damn, that last bump just made me hit Send.
Ted: No, no.
Robin: Don't worry, everyone will get it's a joke.
Ted: No they won't, they'll think…wait. Everyone?
[Lily, Marshall, James, and Barney at the cab also received the message]
Barney: [reads message] "Really rich"? [Everyone laughs]
Ted: [to Robin typing on Blackberry] Ted Mosby is solid as a rock. No, dependable. No, rugged. No-
Robin: Why don't I go to the Chevy website and copy down the adjectives?
Ted: I just want to hit that perfect middle ground.
Robin: How about if we just go wildly to both extremes and let them balance each other out? [reads message] "Ted Mosby is really handsome but extremely violent and really rich, but lacks bladder control-" [truck hits bump; Ted and Robin are jolted] Oh damn, that last bump just made me hit Send.
Ted: No, no.
Robin: Don't worry, everyone will get it's a joke.
Ted: No they won't, they'll think…wait. Everyone?
[Lily, Marshall, James, and Barney at the cab also received the message]
Barney: [reads message] "Really rich"? [Everyone laughs]
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[The gang just saw James finally meet his real dad and Barney acts like he found his father as well]
Lily: Don't worry, we'll just help Barney snap him out of this one.
Marshall: Or we could just let him have this one.
Lily: Are you kidding?
Marshall: Guys, Barney's losing his childhood home, he finally admitted Bob Barker's not his dad, and he watched James meet his real father, it's just a lot to go through in one afternoon. Can't we just let the guy be black for a day?
Lily: Don't worry, we'll just help Barney snap him out of this one.
Marshall: Or we could just let him have this one.
Lily: Are you kidding?
Marshall: Guys, Barney's losing his childhood home, he finally admitted Bob Barker's not his dad, and he watched James meet his real father, it's just a lot to go through in one afternoon. Can't we just let the guy be black for a day?
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Ted has decided not to take GNB's offer to design the headquarters again]
Lily: But designing a building in New York City is your lifelong dream.
Ted: I do not want to work for GNB again. Those guys are evil. No offense, Marshall.
Marshall: None taken. Dude, yes, GNB is the Empire from Star Wars, but the Death Star is gonna get built either way, and don't you think the architect of the Death Star is pretty psyched to have that thing on his space resume. I mean, yes, his design was flawed, he let them fire a single bullet through his particular vent porthole thing.
Ted: For all we know, that was the contractor's fault.
Marshall: But that won't happen on your watch, 'cause you're Ted Mosby, and you're gonna design the most beautiful, ventless, Rebel-proof building in Manhattan…with clearly-marked emergency stops for every trash compactor on the detention level.
Lily: But designing a building in New York City is your lifelong dream.
Ted: I do not want to work for GNB again. Those guys are evil. No offense, Marshall.
Marshall: None taken. Dude, yes, GNB is the Empire from Star Wars, but the Death Star is gonna get built either way, and don't you think the architect of the Death Star is pretty psyched to have that thing on his space resume. I mean, yes, his design was flawed, he let them fire a single bullet through his particular vent porthole thing.
Ted: For all we know, that was the contractor's fault.
Marshall: But that won't happen on your watch, 'cause you're Ted Mosby, and you're gonna design the most beautiful, ventless, Rebel-proof building in Manhattan…with clearly-marked emergency stops for every trash compactor on the detention level.
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
Ted: [addressing his architecture class] Unfinished. Gaudí to his credit never gave up on his dream, but that’s not usually how it goes. It usually isn’t a speeding bus that keeps the brown pointy church from getting built, most of the time it is too difficult or expensive, or too scary. It’s only once you’ve stopped that you realize how hard it is to start again, so you force yourself not to want it. But it’s always there and until you finish it always will be.
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[The gang debates about what the essence of being New Yorkers really is]
Ted: I'd say you're not a real New Yorker until you've stolen a cab from someone who needs it more than you do.
Lily: No, you're not a New Yorker until you've cried on the subway and not given a damn what anyone thinks
Marshall: No, you're not a real New Yorker until you've killed a cockroach with your bare hand.
Ted: I'd say you're not a real New Yorker until you've stolen a cab from someone who needs it more than you do.
Lily: No, you're not a New Yorker until you've cried on the subway and not given a damn what anyone thinks
Marshall: No, you're not a real New Yorker until you've killed a cockroach with your bare hand.
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Future Ted is explaining why Barney needed to win the race]
Barney: [excited] And firing half my department freed up the money to double my own salary, and this chick from Boston was wicked hot in bed last night, and I'm getting more muscular, even though I've stopped working out, and I've got this amazing poker group…
Future Ted: [interrupting the story] Actually, Barney did not need a win.
Barney: [excited] And firing half my department freed up the money to double my own salary, and this chick from Boston was wicked hot in bed last night, and I'm getting more muscular, even though I've stopped working out, and I've got this amazing poker group…
Future Ted: [interrupting the story] Actually, Barney did not need a win.
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Ted and Barney discuss the GNB headquarters project, which may involve tearing down the classic Arcadian theater]
Barney: Ted, I know you love classic stuff no one cares about, but I'm gonna give you four words to live by: New Is Always Better.
Ted: New is always better?
Barney: Ted, you know who's a million times hotter than the hottest girl I've ever slept with? Her okay-looking friend I haven't seen naked. Why? Because new is always better.
Barney: Ted, I know you love classic stuff no one cares about, but I'm gonna give you four words to live by: New Is Always Better.
Ted: New is always better?
Barney: Ted, you know who's a million times hotter than the hottest girl I've ever slept with? Her okay-looking friend I haven't seen naked. Why? Because new is always better.
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[In Marshall's mind, virtual versions of Lily and Robin watch him and Lily have sex over drinks]
Virtual Lily: Ugh, he thinks I like this [Marshall looks at Virtual Lily] and it feels disgusting.
Virtual Robin: Uh, it looks disgusting.
Marshall: [to Lily] Is this working for you?
Virtual Lily: [mocks Marshall] Is this working for you?
Virtual Robin: Of course, because what woman doesn't like being slobbered on while some giant paws at her nether regions like Lennie from Of Mice and Men?
Virtual Lily: We are bad!
Virtual Robin: More Cosmos? [share toast]
Virtual Lily: Ugh, he thinks I like this [Marshall looks at Virtual Lily] and it feels disgusting.
Virtual Robin: Uh, it looks disgusting.
Marshall: [to Lily] Is this working for you?
Virtual Lily: [mocks Marshall] Is this working for you?
Virtual Robin: Of course, because what woman doesn't like being slobbered on while some giant paws at her nether regions like Lennie from Of Mice and Men?
Virtual Lily: We are bad!
Virtual Robin: More Cosmos? [share toast]
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
Robin: Hey.
Barney: Hey!
Robin: Hey. Um, when we were dating, did - did I make you feel needed?
Barney: No, I didn't feel like you needed me at all.
Robin: [sighs] That's what I thought. Uh, I'm sorry. [turns to leave]
Barney: Wait, where are you g- that's a compliment! You're the least needy woman I've ever met. That's awesome! No guy's gonna say "Who's your daddy?" to Robin Scherbatsky; you're your own daddy. And mommy. And weird survivalist uncle who lives in a cabin with a shotgun blaming stuff on the government. And that is what makes you the most amazing, strong, independent woman I've ever banged.
Barney: Hey!
Robin: Hey. Um, when we were dating, did - did I make you feel needed?
Barney: No, I didn't feel like you needed me at all.
Robin: [sighs] That's what I thought. Uh, I'm sorry. [turns to leave]
Barney: Wait, where are you g- that's a compliment! You're the least needy woman I've ever met. That's awesome! No guy's gonna say "Who's your daddy?" to Robin Scherbatsky; you're your own daddy. And mommy. And weird survivalist uncle who lives in a cabin with a shotgun blaming stuff on the government. And that is what makes you the most amazing, strong, independent woman I've ever banged.
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Goliath National Bank's ad]
Voice-over: What makes Goliath National Bank different from other banks? Here at GNB, We Care.
Barney: [holding a recycling bin] I care about our precious Earth. [puts in spent soft drink can]
Randy: [opening the door for an old woman] I care about old people.
Arthur Hobbs: I care about high-yield, offshore investments, and so does Tugboat here. Isn't that right, Tugboat? [plays with dog]
Marshall: [at his office, eating salad] Okay, get that camera out of my face before I flip you like a cheese omelet!
Voice-over: What makes Goliath National Bank different from other banks? Here at GNB, We Care.
Barney: [holding a recycling bin] I care about our precious Earth. [puts in spent soft drink can]
Randy: [opening the door for an old woman] I care about old people.
Arthur Hobbs: I care about high-yield, offshore investments, and so does Tugboat here. Isn't that right, Tugboat? [plays with dog]
Marshall: [at his office, eating salad] Okay, get that camera out of my face before I flip you like a cheese omelet!
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Ted consults Lily about what to do with his students after they walk out, thanks to Zoey. Lily described what she did to Johnny Marley]
Ted: Lily. You're a psychopath.
Lily: Little bit. [to student who gave her a panda drawing] Ah, a panda!
Future Ted: I thought about Lily's advice, and I figured, fear was worth a try. [Ted walks to picket line]
Zoey: Well, Professor Mosby, is there anything you want to say to us?
Ted: [to students] Anyone not in class tomorrow gets an F. [students are shocked]
[at MacLaren's]
Lily: You said that?
Future Ted: Well, technically they'd get an "Incomplete," but I thought "F" had a nice, scary ring to it.
Ted: Lily. You're a psychopath.
Lily: Little bit. [to student who gave her a panda drawing] Ah, a panda!
Future Ted: I thought about Lily's advice, and I figured, fear was worth a try. [Ted walks to picket line]
Zoey: Well, Professor Mosby, is there anything you want to say to us?
Ted: [to students] Anyone not in class tomorrow gets an F. [students are shocked]
[at MacLaren's]
Lily: You said that?
Future Ted: Well, technically they'd get an "Incomplete," but I thought "F" had a nice, scary ring to it.
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother
[Lily sees a College Marshall exhibit and she asks College Marshall to return to her]
College Marshall: You can't have me. Look at the sign. [Lily sees EXTINCT tag at exhibit signage] I'm extinct. I've gone the way of Jane's Addiction.
Lily: Actually, Jane's Addiction got back together.
College Marshall: They did?!
Lily: Yeah, they've done a few tours, they've put out a new album.
College Marshall: Are you serious? That is awesome! Are they just as good?
Lily: [pause] Sure.
College Marshall: You can't have me. Look at the sign. [Lily sees EXTINCT tag at exhibit signage] I'm extinct. I've gone the way of Jane's Addiction.
Lily: Actually, Jane's Addiction got back together.
College Marshall: They did?!
Lily: Yeah, they've done a few tours, they've put out a new album.
College Marshall: Are you serious? That is awesome! Are they just as good?
Lily: [pause] Sure.
TV Show: How I Met Your Mother