Inglourious Basterds Quotes
Adolf Hitler : [ slamming his hand on a table ] Nein nein nein nein nein nein! 
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Lt. Aldo Raine : My name is Lt. Aldo Raine and I'm putting together a special team, and I need me eight soldiers. Eight Jewish-American soldiers. Now, y'all might've heard rumors about the armada happening soon. Well, we'll be leaving a little earlier. We're gonna be dropped into France, dressed as civilians. And once we're in enemy territory, as a bushwhackin' guerrilla army, we're gonna be doin' one thing and one thing only... killin' Nazis. Now, I don't know about y'all, but I sure as hell didn't come down from the goddamn Smoky Mountains, cross five thousand miles of water, fight my way through half of Sicily and jump out of a fuckin' air-o-plane to teach the Nazis lessons in humanity. Nazi ain't got no humanity. They're the foot soldiers of a Jew-hatin', mass murderin' maniac and they need to be dee-stroyed. That's why any and every every son of a bitch we find wearin' a Nazi uniform, they're gonna die. Now, I'm the direct descendant of the mountain man Jim Bridger. That means I got a little Injun in me. And our battle plan will be that of an Apache resistance. We will be cruel to the Germans, and through our cruelty they will know who we are. And they will find the evidence of our cruelty in the disemboweled, dismembered, and disfigured bodies of their brothers we leave behind us. And the German won't not be able to help themselves but to imagine the cruelty their brothers endured at our hands, and our boot heels, and the edge of our knives. And the German will be sickened by us, and the German will talk about us, and the German will fear us. And when the German closes their eyes at night and they're tortured by their subconscious for the evil they have done, it will be with thoughts of us they are tortured with. Sound good?
The Basterds : YES, SIR!
Lt. Aldo Raine : That's what I like to hear. But I got a word of warning for all you would-be warriors. When you join my command, you take on debit. A debit you
The Basterds : YES, SIR!
Lt. Aldo Raine : That's what I like to hear. But I got a word of warning for all you would-be warriors. When you join my command, you take on debit. A debit you
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Lt. Aldo Raine : You probably heard we ain't in the prisoner-takin' business; we in the killin' Nazi business. And cousin, business is a-boomin'. Watch Quote | (Report a problem)
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Col. Hans Landa : What a tremendously hostile world that a rat must endure. Yet not only does he survive, he thrives. Because our little foe has an instinct for survival and preservation second to none... And that Monsieur is what a Jew shares with a rat.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Bridget von Hammersmark : There have been two recent developments regarding Operation Kino. One, the venue has been changed from the Ritz to a much smaller venue.
Lt. Aldo Raine : Enormous changes at the last minute? That's not very "Germatic." Why the hell is Goebbels doing stuff so damn peculiar?
Bridget von Hammersmark : It probably has something to do with the second development.
Lt. Aldo Raine : Which is?
Bridget von Hammersmark : [ sits up ] The Führer is attending the premiere.
Lt. Aldo Raine : Enormous changes at the last minute? That's not very "Germatic." Why the hell is Goebbels doing stuff so damn peculiar?
Bridget von Hammersmark : It probably has something to do with the second development.
Lt. Aldo Raine : Which is?
Bridget von Hammersmark : [ sits up ] The Führer is attending the premiere.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Lt. Aldo Raine : [ Drawing a map ] Up the road apiece, there's a orchard. Now, besides you, we know there's another kraut patrol fuckin' here somewhere. Now if that patrol were to have any crackshots, that orchard would be a goddamn sniper's delight. Now if you ever want to eat a sauerkraut sandwich again, you gotta show me on this map where they are, you gotta tell me how many there are, and you gotta tell me what kinda artillery they're carrying with 'em.
Sgt. Werner Rachtman : You can't expect me to divulge information that would put German lives in danger?
Lt. Aldo Raine : Well Werner, that's where you're wrong, because that's exactly what I expect. I need to about Germans hiding in them trees, and you need to tell me, and you need to tell me. And you need to tell me right now. Now take your finger and point out on this map where this party's being held, how many's coming, and what they brought to play with.
Sgt. Werner Rachtman : I respectfully refuse.
Lt. Aldo Raine : [ a smack is heard offscreen ] Here that? That's Sgt. Donny Donowitz. But you might know him better by his nickname. The Bear Jew. Now, if you heard of Aldo the Apache, you gotta have heard of the Bear Jew.
Sgt. Werner Rachtman : I have heard of the Bear Jew.
Lt. Aldo Raine : What did you hear about him, Werner?
Sgt. Werner Rachtman : He beats German soldiers with a club
Lt. Aldo Raine : He bashes their brains in with a baseball bat is what he does. Now, Werner, I'm gonna ask you one more goddamn time, and if you still "respectfully refuse," I'm callin' the Bear Jew over here, and he's gonna take that big-ole bat of his, and he's gonna beat you to death with it. Now take your wiener schnitzel lickin' finger and point out on this map what I want to know.
Sgt. Werner Rachtman : Fuck you. [ pause ]
Sgt. Werner Rachtman : You can't expect me to divulge information that would put German lives in danger?
Lt. Aldo Raine : Well Werner, that's where you're wrong, because that's exactly what I expect. I need to about Germans hiding in them trees, and you need to tell me, and you need to tell me. And you need to tell me right now. Now take your finger and point out on this map where this party's being held, how many's coming, and what they brought to play with.
Sgt. Werner Rachtman : I respectfully refuse.
Lt. Aldo Raine : [ a smack is heard offscreen ] Here that? That's Sgt. Donny Donowitz. But you might know him better by his nickname. The Bear Jew. Now, if you heard of Aldo the Apache, you gotta have heard of the Bear Jew.
Sgt. Werner Rachtman : I have heard of the Bear Jew.
Lt. Aldo Raine : What did you hear about him, Werner?
Sgt. Werner Rachtman : He beats German soldiers with a club
Lt. Aldo Raine : He bashes their brains in with a baseball bat is what he does. Now, Werner, I'm gonna ask you one more goddamn time, and if you still "respectfully refuse," I'm callin' the Bear Jew over here, and he's gonna take that big-ole bat of his, and he's gonna beat you to death with it. Now take your wiener schnitzel lickin' finger and point out on this map what I want to know.
Sgt. Werner Rachtman : Fuck you. [ pause ]
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Col. Hans Landa : [ giddy ] Oooh, that's a bingo!
Col. Hans Landa : Is that the way you say it? "That's a bingo?"
Lt. Aldo Raine : You just say "bingo".
Col. Hans Landa : Bingo! How fun! But, I digress. Where were we?
Col. Hans Landa : Is that the way you say it? "That's a bingo?"
Lt. Aldo Raine : You just say "bingo".
Col. Hans Landa : Bingo! How fun! But, I digress. Where were we?
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Major Dieter Hellstrom : I must say I grow weary of these monkeyshines. [ Maj. Hellstrom cocks his Walther pistol and aims it at Lt. Hicox under the table ]
Major Dieter Hellstrom : Did you hear that? That was the sound of my Walther. Pointed right at your testicles.
Lt. Archie Hicox : Why do you have your Walther pointed at my testicles?
Major Dieter Hellstrom : Because you've just given yourself away, Captain. You're no more German than that scotch.
Lt. Archie Hicox : Well, Major...
Bridget von Hammersmark : Major...
Major Dieter Hellstrom : - Shut up, slut. You were saying?
Lt. Archie Hicox : I was saying that that makes two of us. I've had a gun pointed at your balls since you sat down. [ Stiglitz takes Hellstrom by the shoulder and aggressively forces a gun against his crotch ]
Sgt. Hugo Stiglitz : That makes three of us. And at this range, I'm a real Frederick Zoller.
Major Dieter Hellstrom : Looks like we have a bit of a sticky situation here.
Lt. Archie Hicox : What's going to happen, Major... you're going to stand up and walk out that door with us.
Major Dieter Hellstrom : No, no, no, no, no, no. I don't think so. I'm afraid you and I... we both know, Captain... no matter what happens to anybody else in this room... the two of us aren't going anywhere. Too bad about Sergeant Wilhelm and his famous friends. If any of you expect to live, you'll have to shoot them too. Looks like little Max will grow up an orphan. How sad.
Lt. Archie Hicox : [ In English ] Well, if this is it, old boy, I hope you don't mind if I go out speaking the King's.
Major Dieter Hellstrom : By all means, Captain.
Lt. Archie Hicox : [ picks up his glass of scotch ] There's a specia
Major Dieter Hellstrom : Did you hear that? That was the sound of my Walther. Pointed right at your testicles.
Lt. Archie Hicox : Why do you have your Walther pointed at my testicles?
Major Dieter Hellstrom : Because you've just given yourself away, Captain. You're no more German than that scotch.
Lt. Archie Hicox : Well, Major...
Bridget von Hammersmark : Major...
Major Dieter Hellstrom : - Shut up, slut. You were saying?
Lt. Archie Hicox : I was saying that that makes two of us. I've had a gun pointed at your balls since you sat down. [ Stiglitz takes Hellstrom by the shoulder and aggressively forces a gun against his crotch ]
Sgt. Hugo Stiglitz : That makes three of us. And at this range, I'm a real Frederick Zoller.
Major Dieter Hellstrom : Looks like we have a bit of a sticky situation here.
Lt. Archie Hicox : What's going to happen, Major... you're going to stand up and walk out that door with us.
Major Dieter Hellstrom : No, no, no, no, no, no. I don't think so. I'm afraid you and I... we both know, Captain... no matter what happens to anybody else in this room... the two of us aren't going anywhere. Too bad about Sergeant Wilhelm and his famous friends. If any of you expect to live, you'll have to shoot them too. Looks like little Max will grow up an orphan. How sad.
Lt. Archie Hicox : [ In English ] Well, if this is it, old boy, I hope you don't mind if I go out speaking the King's.
Major Dieter Hellstrom : By all means, Captain.
Lt. Archie Hicox : [ picks up his glass of scotch ] There's a specia
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Shosanna Dreyfus : [ to Fredrick ] If you are so desperate for a French girlfriend, I suggest you try Vichy.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Col. Hans Landa : Now if one were to determine what attribute the German people share with a beast, it would be the cunning and the predatory instinct of a hawk. But if one were to determine what attributes the Jews share with a beast, it would be that of the rat. If a rat were to walk in here right now as I'm talking, would you treat it to a saucer of your delicious milk?
Perrier LaPadite : Probably not.
Col. Hans Landa : I didn't think so. You don't like them. You don't really know why you don't like them. All you know is you find them repulsive. Consequently, a German soldier conducts a search of a house suspected of hiding Jews. Where does the hawk look? He looks in the barn, he looks in the attic, he looks in the cellar, he looks everywhere *he* would hide, but there's so many places it would never occur to a hawk to hide. However, the reason the Führer's brought me off my Alps in Austria and placed me in French cow country today is because it does occur to me. Because I'm aware what tremendous feats human beings are capable of once they abandon dignity.
Perrier LaPadite : Probably not.
Col. Hans Landa : I didn't think so. You don't like them. You don't really know why you don't like them. All you know is you find them repulsive. Consequently, a German soldier conducts a search of a house suspected of hiding Jews. Where does the hawk look? He looks in the barn, he looks in the attic, he looks in the cellar, he looks everywhere *he* would hide, but there's so many places it would never occur to a hawk to hide. However, the reason the Führer's brought me off my Alps in Austria and placed me in French cow country today is because it does occur to me. Because I'm aware what tremendous feats human beings are capable of once they abandon dignity.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Col. Hans Landa : Tell me, Aldo, if I were sitting where you're sitting, would you show me mercy?
Lt. Aldo Raine : Nope.
Col. Hans Landa : What's that English saying about shoes and feet?
Lt. Aldo Raine : 'Looks like the shoe's on the other foot.' Yeah, I was just thinking that.
Lt. Aldo Raine : Nope.
Col. Hans Landa : What's that English saying about shoes and feet?
Lt. Aldo Raine : 'Looks like the shoe's on the other foot.' Yeah, I was just thinking that.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Sgt. Donny Donowitz : We punch those goons out, take their machine guns, and burst in there blasting!
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Narrator : [ voice-over ] The reason for Hugo Stiglitz's celebrity among German soldiers is simple. As a German enlisted man, he killed thirteen Gestapo officers, mostly Majors. Instead of putting him up against a wall, the High Command decided to send him back to Berlin, to be made an example of. Needless to say, once the Basterds heard of him, he never got there.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Col. Hans Landa : May I smoke my pipe as well?
Perrier LaPadite : Please, Cononel, make yourself at home. [ Hans pulls out a very large pipe five times the size of Perrier's ]
Perrier LaPadite : Please, Cononel, make yourself at home. [ Hans pulls out a very large pipe five times the size of Perrier's ]
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Lt. Aldo Raine : [ Aldo shoots Hans' driver Hermann, and gives Utivich a knife ] Scalp Hermann.
Col. Hans Landa : Are you mad? What have you done? I made a deal with your general for that man's life!
Lt. Aldo Raine : Yeah, they made that deal, but they don't give a fuck about him. They need you.
Col. Hans Landa : You'll be shot for this!
Lt. Aldo Raine : Nah, I don't think so. More like chewed out. I've been chewed out before.
Col. Hans Landa : Are you mad? What have you done? I made a deal with your general for that man's life!
Lt. Aldo Raine : Yeah, they made that deal, but they don't give a fuck about him. They need you.
Col. Hans Landa : You'll be shot for this!
Lt. Aldo Raine : Nah, I don't think so. More like chewed out. I've been chewed out before.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Lt. Aldo Raine : You didn't say the goddamn rendezvous was in a fuckin' basement.
Lt. Archie Hicox : I didn't know.
Lt. Aldo Raine : You said it was in a tavern.
Lt. Archie Hicox : It is a tavern.
Lt. Aldo Raine : Yeah, in a basement. You know, fightin' in a basement offers a lot of difficulties. Number one being, you're fightin' in a basement!
Lt. Archie Hicox : I didn't know.
Lt. Aldo Raine : You said it was in a tavern.
Lt. Archie Hicox : It is a tavern.
Lt. Aldo Raine : Yeah, in a basement. You know, fightin' in a basement offers a lot of difficulties. Number one being, you're fightin' in a basement!
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Sgt. Donny Donowitz : Speaking of Frau von Hammersmark, whose idea was it for the death trap rendezvous?
Lt. Archie Hicox : She chose the spot.
Sgt. Donny Donowitz : Well, isn't that just dandy.
Lt. Archie Hicox : Look, she's not a military strategist. She's just an actress.
Lt. Aldo Raine : Well, you don't got to be Stonewall Jackson to know you don't want to fight in a basement.
Lt. Archie Hicox : She chose the spot.
Sgt. Donny Donowitz : Well, isn't that just dandy.
Lt. Archie Hicox : Look, she's not a military strategist. She's just an actress.
Lt. Aldo Raine : Well, you don't got to be Stonewall Jackson to know you don't want to fight in a basement.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Francesca Mondino : [ in French; subtitled ] Emanuelle, did you enjoy "Lucky Kids"?
Shosanna Dreyfus : [ in French ] I rather liked Lillian Harvey.
Joseph Goebbels : [ suddenly in German ] Lillian Harvey! Never mention that name in my presence!
Shosanna Dreyfus : [ in French ] I rather liked Lillian Harvey.
Joseph Goebbels : [ suddenly in German ] Lillian Harvey! Never mention that name in my presence!
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Marcel : [ in French; subtitled ] What the fuck are we supposed to do?
Shosanna Dreyfus : [ in French ] It looks like we're supposed to have a Nazi premiere.
Marcel : Like I said, what the fuck are we supposed to do?
Shosanna Dreyfus : [ in French ] It looks like we're supposed to have a Nazi premiere.
Marcel : Like I said, what the fuck are we supposed to do?
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Kliest : [ in German; subtitled ] Mein Führer, do you still wish to see Private Butz?
Adolf Hitler : [ in German ] Who and what is a "Private Butz"?
Adolf Hitler : [ in German ] Who and what is a "Private Butz"?
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Marcel : [ in French; subtitled ] What are we talking about?
Shosanna Dreyfus : [ in French ] Filling the cinema with Nazis and burning it to the ground.
Marcel : I'm not talking about that. You're talking about that.
Shosanna Dreyfus : [ in French ] Filling the cinema with Nazis and burning it to the ground.
Marcel : I'm not talking about that. You're talking about that.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Col. Hans Landa : [ to a bound and blindfolded Lt. Aldo ] You've had a nice long run, Aldo. Alas, you're now in the hands of the SS. [ raises hands in a dramatic manner ]
Col. Hans Landa : My hands, to be exact. And they've been waiting a long time to touch you. [ fingers reach out and poke Lt. Aldo in the face; Lt. Aldo flinches ]
Col. Hans Landa : [ chuckling ] Caught you flinching. [ Lt. Aldo headbutts Col. Landa ]
Col. Hans Landa : My hands, to be exact. And they've been waiting a long time to touch you. [ fingers reach out and poke Lt. Aldo in the face; Lt. Aldo flinches ]
Col. Hans Landa : [ chuckling ] Caught you flinching. [ Lt. Aldo headbutts Col. Landa ]
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Shosanna Dreyfus : My name is Shosanna Dreyfus and THIS is the face... of Jewish vengeance!
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Shosanna Dreyfus : [ threatening a French film developer ] You either do what the fuck we tell you, or I'll bury this axe in your collaborating skull.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Major Dieter Hellstrom : [ Hellstrom is trying to guess the famous person on his forehead, which is King Kong ] [ in German; subtitled ]
Major Dieter Hellstrom : I'll start, give you the idea. Am I German?
Bridget von Hammersmark : [ in German ] No.
Major Dieter Hellstrom : Am I American?
Cpl. Wilhelm Wicki : Wait a minute, he goes to...
Bridget von Hammersmark : Don't be ridiculous. Obviously I wasn't born in America.
Major Dieter Hellstrom : So, I visited America, yes?
Bridget von Hammersmark : Yes.
Major Dieter Hellstrom : Was this visit fortuitous?
Cpl. Wilhelm Wicki : Not for you.
Major Dieter Hellstrom : I'll start, give you the idea. Am I German?
Bridget von Hammersmark : [ in German ] No.
Major Dieter Hellstrom : Am I American?
Cpl. Wilhelm Wicki : Wait a minute, he goes to...
Bridget von Hammersmark : Don't be ridiculous. Obviously I wasn't born in America.
Major Dieter Hellstrom : So, I visited America, yes?
Bridget von Hammersmark : Yes.
Major Dieter Hellstrom : Was this visit fortuitous?
Cpl. Wilhelm Wicki : Not for you.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Joseph Goebbels : [ in German ] You have opera boxes?
Shosanna Dreyfus : Oui.
Joseph Goebbels : How many?
Shosanna Dreyfus : [ in French ] Two.
Joseph Goebbels : More would be better.
Shosanna Dreyfus : Oui.
Joseph Goebbels : How many?
Shosanna Dreyfus : [ in French ] Two.
Joseph Goebbels : More would be better.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds
Joseph Goebbels : [ to Frederick ] It seems I've created a monster. A strangely persuasive monster.
Movie: Inglourious Basterds