Invader Zim Quotes
Host: I've come to the conclusion that Dib is crazy. [to GIR] This one, definitely crazy. I feel sorry for the ugly green kid, but there's a good chance he's crazy too!
Zim: But not an alien?
Host: Nope.
Zim: Okay.
Host: Just crazy.
Zim: [pumps arms in the air in victory]
Zim: But not an alien?
Host: Nope.
Zim: Okay.
Host: Just crazy.
Zim: [pumps arms in the air in victory]
TV Show: Invader Zim
Prof. Membrane: As we all know, every source of energy requires fuel. So, I got to thinking, why has no one invented a power source that needs no fuel? Why?!?!
TV Show: Invader Zim
Torque: [Back in the auditorium][In a somewhat disgruntled tone] Pffft. I didn't know that!
Prof. Membrane: I made the Perpetual Energy Generator, or, as I call her, PEG. Tonight, I activate it. If it works, we never have to worry about power again! If it doesn't, it'll send out a wave of doom that will destroy all life on Earth!
Spectator: What was that last part?
Prof. Membrane: I made the Perpetual Energy Generator, or, as I call her, PEG. Tonight, I activate it. If it works, we never have to worry about power again! If it doesn't, it'll send out a wave of doom that will destroy all life on Earth!
Spectator: What was that last part?
TV Show: Invader Zim
[Dib's future self concludes a lengthy explanation as to how he's in the past]
Future Dib: ...so, it's up to you now.
Dib: Wow. I'm boring! Do I always explain everything like this?
Future Dib: ...so, it's up to you now.
Dib: Wow. I'm boring! Do I always explain everything like this?
TV Show: Invader Zim
[In the classroom a student is held in mid air by a harness and is stacking cards in a tower]
Ms. Bitters: Now, add the dead weight of students like you.
[The child adds a huge stack of cards to the tower. It sways dangerously]
Ms. Bitters: So you can see, children, that our whole society is nothing more than a perilous house of cards...
[The tower collapses into a heap]
Ms. Bitters: ...destined to collapse under its own weight!
Ms. Bitters: Now, add the dead weight of students like you.
[The child adds a huge stack of cards to the tower. It sways dangerously]
Ms. Bitters: So you can see, children, that our whole society is nothing more than a perilous house of cards...
[The tower collapses into a heap]
Ms. Bitters: ...destined to collapse under its own weight!
TV Show: Invader Zim
[Zim watching buyer choke violently on the candy bar]
Zim: Uh-huh, that's the sawdust.
Zim: Uh-huh, that's the sawdust.
TV Show: Invader Zim
Zim: Who are you!?
Poop Dog: I am-
Zim: Who are you!?
Poop Dog: I am-
Zim: Who are you!?
Poop Dog: I am Poop Dog!
Poop Dog: I am-
Zim: Who are you!?
Poop Dog: I am-
Zim: Who are you!?
Poop Dog: I am Poop Dog!
TV Show: Invader Zim
Mutant: Pweeeease? For the childwen!
Mr. Grout: [voice only] We'll buy your candy! We'll buy your candy!
Mr. Grout: [voice only] We'll buy your candy! We'll buy your candy!
TV Show: Invader Zim
Ms. Bitters: Children, your performance was miserable. Your parents will all receive phone calls instructing them to love you less now.
Skool Children: Awww...
Skool Children: Awww...
TV Show: Invader Zim
Video Store Clerk: Hey,Man.It's Been 4 weeks since you rented Intestines of War.It's 20 Days overdue.Hello?Hell-lo?!
GIR: Who is it?(Hangs up)
Zim: [in a mocking voice] I gunna watch it again.
[long pause]
GIR: ...I GUNNA WATCH IT AGAIN!!!
Zim: This is the hundredth time, GIR. You have to stop watching this thing or-OH, WHAT IS THAT? [points to TV]A warning?Oh no!Oh no!FBI?Who is this FBI? Why are they trying to warn us about?
GIR: SHHH!
Zim: (screaming)
GIR: Who is it?(Hangs up)
Zim: [in a mocking voice] I gunna watch it again.
[long pause]
GIR: ...I GUNNA WATCH IT AGAIN!!!
Zim: This is the hundredth time, GIR. You have to stop watching this thing or-OH, WHAT IS THAT? [points to TV]A warning?Oh no!Oh no!FBI?Who is this FBI? Why are they trying to warn us about?
GIR: SHHH!
Zim: (screaming)
TV Show: Invader Zim
Zim: Computer! Give me all the information you have on the FBI.
Computer: The FBI is a government law enforcement agency.
Zim: Continue.
Computer: Insufficient data.
Zim: Insufficient data! Can't you just make an educated guess?
Computer: Okaaaaaay...uh...founded in 1492 by, uh...demons, the FBI is a crack law enforcement agency designed to...uh, I dunno, fight...aliens?
Zim: I knew it! This is baaaad! This is so baaaad!
Computer: The FBI is a government law enforcement agency.
Zim: Continue.
Computer: Insufficient data.
Zim: Insufficient data! Can't you just make an educated guess?
Computer: Okaaaaaay...uh...founded in 1492 by, uh...demons, the FBI is a crack law enforcement agency designed to...uh, I dunno, fight...aliens?
Zim: I knew it! This is baaaad! This is so baaaad!
TV Show: Invader Zim
Doot: I wanna rent this one!
Video Store Clerk: Why!?! So you can keep it for weeks and weeks and not return it? What about all the other people that wanna watch it?! You ever think about them? Huh? HUH??
[Doot begins to cry]
Video Store Clerk: Why!?! So you can keep it for weeks and weeks and not return it? What about all the other people that wanna watch it?! You ever think about them? Huh? HUH??
[Doot begins to cry]
TV Show: Invader Zim
Sgt. Shriver: He caught me sleeping during my shift. When you break the rules, Rankle sends you here. Every couple a days, he takes someone away. They never come back. Some say he just lets 'em go. Me? I say he takes them and turn 'em into horrible zombie soldiers in that new zombie lab they just put in out back.
TV Show: Invader Zim
Slab Rankle: Oh, it's not that simple my friend... Slab Rankle is not that easy to pull it over in defeat! Because Slab...and Rankle and, and Slab and... TIME FOR ZOMBIES!
TV Show: Invader Zim
Tallest Red: Welcome planetary conversion team! Welcome to Blorch, the latest addition to the Irken Empire, and most importantly, the first planet to fall victim to our latest effort at universal conquest, Operation Impending Doom II!
Crowd Member: Almighty Tallest rocks!
Tallest Red: Now we erase the remaining organics on Blorch, paving the way for…I dunno, maybe a parking structure planet?
Tallest Purple: Yeah! Parking Structure Planet!
Crowd Member: Almighty Tallest rocks!
Tallest Red: Now we erase the remaining organics on Blorch, paving the way for…I dunno, maybe a parking structure planet?
Tallest Purple: Yeah! Parking Structure Planet!
TV Show: Invader Zim
Zim: Truly I am amazing. How could they not cheer the very sight of my progress? Still, I am becoming impatient with my incredibly subtle infiltration of this planet, and am growing ever hungrier to be the destruction of the humans. Destruction is nice!
TV Show: Invader Zim
Janitor: I believe you. I think I can help you.
Dib: What are you gonna do? Clean me?
Dib: What are you gonna do? Clean me?
TV Show: Invader Zim
Hologram: My people worked themselves into extinction making our planet a working vessel!
Zim: Why would you do that?
Hologram: Because it's cool.
GIR: *nods* Mmm-hmm.
Zim: Why would you do that?
Hologram: Because it's cool.
GIR: *nods* Mmm-hmm.
TV Show: Invader Zim
Zim: Mission accomplished, my Tallest! I have rid this solar system of Mars!
Tallest Purple: I thought you were trying to destroy the Earth.
Zim: Oh! Yes. That! You heard wrong! This time I was trying to get rid of Mars. You know, just a little warm up before I destroy the humans! Yeah, see, I'll do Earth next! I'm an unstoppable death machine, you know.
Tallest Purple: I thought you were trying to destroy the Earth.
Zim: Oh! Yes. That! You heard wrong! This time I was trying to get rid of Mars. You know, just a little warm up before I destroy the humans! Yeah, see, I'll do Earth next! I'm an unstoppable death machine, you know.
TV Show: Invader Zim
Blue-eyed Alien: You have fallen for our clever trap!
Green-eyed Alien: He sure did pa!
Zim: You threw me in a sack!
Green-eyed Alien: He sure did pa!
Zim: You threw me in a sack!
TV Show: Invader Zim
Blue-eyed Alien: But enough philosophy.
Zim: But we haven't been talking about-
Blue-eyed Alien: Let the hideous experiments begin!
Zim: But we haven't been talking about-
Blue-eyed Alien: Let the hideous experiments begin!
TV Show: Invader Zim
Green-eyed Alien: We will begin by fusing you to this other human.
Zim: That's no human, that's a gopher!
Blue-eyed Alien: Silence!
Zim: That's no human, that's a gopher!
Blue-eyed Alien: Silence!
TV Show: Invader Zim
Tallest Red: So, you're saying the humans are dumb, yet...tall. How is that even possible? How can anything tall be dumb?
Tallest Purple: [with his mouth full] Yeah, huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can you imagine, huh? Huh? Huh?
Tallest Purple: [with his mouth full] Yeah, huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can you imagine, huh? Huh? Huh?
TV Show: Invader Zim
Maria: Don't say that name 'round here! He is the demon beast! We've lost three chicken cookers since he come around!
Dib: Chickenfoot ate them?
Maria: No, they got better jobs...but I hate that chicken beast! Get out! Get out now! Before you get a better job too!
Dib: Chickenfoot ate them?
Maria: No, they got better jobs...but I hate that chicken beast! Get out! Get out now! Before you get a better job too!
TV Show: Invader Zim