Kitchen Nightmares Quotes
Gordon Ramsay: A good restaurant does one type of food brilliantly. A bad one does fifty types incompetently.
Movie: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: (finds a half tomato) Where's that from? That's been sliced. That's gone out. Where's that-- Hey madam, where's that tomato gone?
(the other half is being served on a dish in the dining room.)
Gordon: (digging through the slugs in the tomato.) Look! It's (bleep) rotten, you (bleep) idiot! IT'S ROTTEN!! Has a customer just been served a slice of tomato?!!
Server: No, no, no.
Gordon: So where is it?!!
Andrew: (interview) Oh my god.
(A customer starts eating the other half of the tomato.)
Martin: (interview) Things are looking pretty glum.
(the other half is being served on a dish in the dining room.)
Gordon: (digging through the slugs in the tomato.) Look! It's (bleep) rotten, you (bleep) idiot! IT'S ROTTEN!! Has a customer just been served a slice of tomato?!!
Server: No, no, no.
Gordon: So where is it?!!
Andrew: (interview) Oh my god.
(A customer starts eating the other half of the tomato.)
Martin: (interview) Things are looking pretty glum.
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: No one is getting served from this (bleep) restaurant tonight! Let's make that clear! Yes or no? Anyone against that?
Andrew: No.
Gordon: No, good.
Martin: (interview) That didn't go down too good. He was extremely angry and extremely pissed off.
Gordon: We are not...ever...again serving any of this food. I don't give a (bleep) what anyone says. Can you go and tell them that the kitchen is closed? Right now! Out there and tell them the truth! Tell them now!
Andrew: (interview) Gordon was so outraged. So angry. I've never seen anything like it.
Gordon: (who can be heard in the dining room) FROM GREEN BURGERS, TO (bleep) FURRY CUCUMBERS, TO (bleep) RANCID POTATOES!!!
Andrew: No.
Gordon: No, good.
Martin: (interview) That didn't go down too good. He was extremely angry and extremely pissed off.
Gordon: We are not...ever...again serving any of this food. I don't give a (bleep) what anyone says. Can you go and tell them that the kitchen is closed? Right now! Out there and tell them the truth! Tell them now!
Andrew: (interview) Gordon was so outraged. So angry. I've never seen anything like it.
Gordon: (who can be heard in the dining room) FROM GREEN BURGERS, TO (bleep) FURRY CUCUMBERS, TO (bleep) RANCID POTATOES!!!
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
[The New York Dragons were not on the reservation list thanks to Mike]
Lisa: (interview) The Dragons were supposed to be on that list and Mike just forgot!
Lisa: How is that missed? How is that overlooked?
Mike: Someone-- the dragons just...
Lisa: Mike, that's what I'm saying.
Mike: I'm not sure what transpired.
Lisa: (interview) It was so upsetting. The was no Dragons on there!
Gordon: My god. For me, it's the most important table. That's embarrasing.
Lisa: You're overlooking extremely important things!
Mike: I was not told about the Dragons. I found out...
Lisa: Well, why do you keep saying that?
Mike: (losing it) Because I wasn't!! I wasn't told!!
Lisa: Excuse me, do not talk to me like that!
Mike: I was told at 7: 00 this morning. THAT IT!!! Seriously, I'm pissed off!! DRAGONS ON THE PAPER!!! I'm pissed off!! Not my fault!! Dragons over here, I put them on at 7: 00. COULD WE PLEASE MOVE ON?!!! THAT'S IT!!! NOT MY FAULT!!!
Lisa: (interview) The Dragons were supposed to be on that list and Mike just forgot!
Lisa: How is that missed? How is that overlooked?
Mike: Someone-- the dragons just...
Lisa: Mike, that's what I'm saying.
Mike: I'm not sure what transpired.
Lisa: (interview) It was so upsetting. The was no Dragons on there!
Gordon: My god. For me, it's the most important table. That's embarrasing.
Lisa: You're overlooking extremely important things!
Mike: I was not told about the Dragons. I found out...
Lisa: Well, why do you keep saying that?
Mike: (losing it) Because I wasn't!! I wasn't told!!
Lisa: Excuse me, do not talk to me like that!
Mike: I was told at 7: 00 this morning. THAT IT!!! Seriously, I'm pissed off!! DRAGONS ON THE PAPER!!! I'm pissed off!! Not my fault!! Dragons over here, I put them on at 7: 00. COULD WE PLEASE MOVE ON?!!! THAT'S IT!!! NOT MY FAULT!!!
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: (after tasting the crab cakes) They've got it wrong on the menu. It's not a crab cake. It's a crap cake. Because if I eat anymore, I'll be busy crapping for the next hundred and five years.
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: (finding frozen ravoli that he had for lunch) Bingo. These were my fresh lobster ravoli. Fresh? My (bleep) ass. I've eaten this (bleep)!
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: I've never done that before, close down a restaurant, but that was a (bleep) embarassment. Seascape open? (slams closed sign over open one on sandwich board) Close the (bleep) place.
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: (taking off his jacket.) (Bleep) hell.
Narrator: With the restaurant on the verge of success, Chef Michel is insisting on reverting back to his old ways and Gordon has reached his breaking point.
Michel: Thank you very much.
Gordon: Cut the (bleep). You don't care anymore. Just get straight to the (bleep) answer.
Michel: I'm not cutting no (bleep). I'm just telling it like it is.
Gordon: Get straight to the (bleep) answer.
Michel: Alright? Your menu's not better than mine, you know?
Gordon: You're a donkey.
Michel: My food has been voted best Chef in Ventura county.
Gordon: WHAT?!!!
Michel: Yeah, listen.
Gordon: Hold On, Hold On. Let me finish!! Let me finish!! You put your (bleep) hands up here and listen to me. YOU RUN A (bleep)HOLE OF A KITCHEN!!! (Bleep) YOURSELF!!!
Michel: NO! NO! NO!
Gordon: (furious) (bleep) OFF!!! Who the (bleep) are you to turn around and tell me when you work like a PIG?!!! YOU FRENCH PIG!!!
Michel: Pig?
Gordon: YOU (bleep) PIG!!!! You're a lazy pig! You're so full of (bleep)! Open your eyes! Take a look around.
Michel: Big mouth! You're not happy?
Gordon: I'M (bleep) HAPPY!
Michel: Go on! You can get out!
Gordon: (flips Michel off) (Bleep) YOURSELF!!
Michel: You can get out! It's my (bleep) kitchen!!!
Gordon: Is It? Well it your (bleep) KITCHEN THEN CLEAN IT YOU LAZY (bleep)!!!!!
Michel: (flabbergasted) No.
Narrator: With the restaurant on the verge of success, Chef Michel is insisting on reverting back to his old ways and Gordon has reached his breaking point.
Michel: Thank you very much.
Gordon: Cut the (bleep). You don't care anymore. Just get straight to the (bleep) answer.
Michel: I'm not cutting no (bleep). I'm just telling it like it is.
Gordon: Get straight to the (bleep) answer.
Michel: Alright? Your menu's not better than mine, you know?
Gordon: You're a donkey.
Michel: My food has been voted best Chef in Ventura county.
Gordon: WHAT?!!!
Michel: Yeah, listen.
Gordon: Hold On, Hold On. Let me finish!! Let me finish!! You put your (bleep) hands up here and listen to me. YOU RUN A (bleep)HOLE OF A KITCHEN!!! (Bleep) YOURSELF!!!
Michel: NO! NO! NO!
Gordon: (furious) (bleep) OFF!!! Who the (bleep) are you to turn around and tell me when you work like a PIG?!!! YOU FRENCH PIG!!!
Michel: Pig?
Gordon: YOU (bleep) PIG!!!! You're a lazy pig! You're so full of (bleep)! Open your eyes! Take a look around.
Michel: Big mouth! You're not happy?
Gordon: I'M (bleep) HAPPY!
Michel: Go on! You can get out!
Gordon: (flips Michel off) (Bleep) YOURSELF!!
Michel: You can get out! It's my (bleep) kitchen!!!
Gordon: Is It? Well it your (bleep) KITCHEN THEN CLEAN IT YOU LAZY (bleep)!!!!!
Michel: (flabbergasted) No.
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: A restaurant run by three passionate owners? No chance. Brian, he works two days a week. David, well I don't trust him one little inch. And as for Greg, well he's pissed off at both of them. Basically in a nutshell, Sleepy, Dopey and Grumpy. Who am I? Snow (bleep) White?
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: What a beautiful, quaint little town. I can't think of a better way to spend Valentine's Day than at Hannah &... (sees that the sign is missing the N from "Mason's") Maso's? I guess they couldn't afford the "N." That's not a good start.
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
[Dover sole stuffed with imitation crab meat is being sent back to the kitchen]
Sammy: What's the matter with this?
Waiter: She said it's not fresh, she said it's no good.
Gordon: It's (bleep) watery.
Sammy: Let me have a taste. How bad is it? (tastes it) It's not bad though! It's not bad! It's not bad! (Gordon tastes it and spits it out.) Ohhhh no! Come on! He spits it out. It's not bad.
Gordon: You're (bleep) delusional. It's mushy. It's watery. It's fake.
Sammy: It's not the right crab meat. You're right.
Gordon: And it's (bleep) disgusting. You're jumping up and down like a big (bleep) baboon and "Ho, ho! It's good!" Whoo!
Sammy: What's the matter with this?
Waiter: She said it's not fresh, she said it's no good.
Gordon: It's (bleep) watery.
Sammy: Let me have a taste. How bad is it? (tastes it) It's not bad though! It's not bad! It's not bad! (Gordon tastes it and spits it out.) Ohhhh no! Come on! He spits it out. It's not bad.
Gordon: You're (bleep) delusional. It's mushy. It's watery. It's fake.
Sammy: It's not the right crab meat. You're right.
Gordon: And it's (bleep) disgusting. You're jumping up and down like a big (bleep) baboon and "Ho, ho! It's good!" Whoo!
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: Watching this restaurant perform is embarrassing. Fake (bleep) crab meat inside of sole? It's pretty obvious, it's become the appendix of restaurants in Stamford. You just want to get rid of it and get it out.
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Narrator: With food now coming back, it's a perfect opportunity for Gordon to witness Sammy's customer service skills.
Sammy: How did you want your meat cooked? Did you want it rare?
Lady: I wanted it medium rare.
Sammy: So can we make you another one? Will you wait or you don't want it all?
Lady: I'll wait, but the thing is I don't want you to stick it back in a microwave.
Sammy: No, we're going to throw that out and make you a new one. Nobody's talking about microwave. You're the one who's talking about microwave.
Lady: It came out of a microwave, otherwise it wouldn't be exsuding heat.
Sammy: Do you work for a microwave company? You know so much about microwave. Unbelieveable. Unbelieveable. Get the (bleep) out of here. Tell her to take a hike.
Customers: That is rude. Wow. To speak to a customer like that, that's disgusting.
[Later when the lamb is recooked and brought back to the lady, the restaurant breaks out in applause]
Sammy: No wait, we're not done yet. I wanna see you cut into it. How is it? Is it still too rare?
Lady: You know what? I'm done. No more chances.
Sammy: Unbelieveable. (interview) Oh my god. I just wanted to pick her up and throw her out. There's a right way and a wrong way of handling something like that and she was totally wrong.
Sammy: How did you want your meat cooked? Did you want it rare?
Lady: I wanted it medium rare.
Sammy: So can we make you another one? Will you wait or you don't want it all?
Lady: I'll wait, but the thing is I don't want you to stick it back in a microwave.
Sammy: No, we're going to throw that out and make you a new one. Nobody's talking about microwave. You're the one who's talking about microwave.
Lady: It came out of a microwave, otherwise it wouldn't be exsuding heat.
Sammy: Do you work for a microwave company? You know so much about microwave. Unbelieveable. Unbelieveable. Get the (bleep) out of here. Tell her to take a hike.
Customers: That is rude. Wow. To speak to a customer like that, that's disgusting.
[Later when the lamb is recooked and brought back to the lady, the restaurant breaks out in applause]
Sammy: No wait, we're not done yet. I wanna see you cut into it. How is it? Is it still too rare?
Lady: You know what? I'm done. No more chances.
Sammy: Unbelieveable. (interview) Oh my god. I just wanted to pick her up and throw her out. There's a right way and a wrong way of handling something like that and she was totally wrong.
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
[Gordon finds a tray of ground beef with dried up fat covering it.]
Gordon: What is that?!!
Vic: Ground beef.
Gordon: Ground beef?!! Half of it's (bleep) fat you idiot! It's fatter than you!
Gordon: What is that?!!
Vic: Ground beef.
Gordon: Ground beef?!! Half of it's (bleep) fat you idiot! It's fatter than you!
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
[After discovering the disgusting food in the kitchen, Gordon bursts into the dining room with a huge bucket full of stale refried beans]
Gordon: Ladies and gentlemen, I'm so sorry but we're stopping service. Everything you've had to eat, drink so far is all on the house. Sir, that thing you have in your hand, put it down! Because if you just seen where it came from like I have, you wouldn't be eating it. Very sorry. Close up. (to Vic) No bill anywhere!
Vic: (interview) I was like "What the hell are you doing?" You can't do that to my customers.
Gordon: By the way, there's your refried beans on the way out. Have a look at them.
Gordon: Ladies and gentlemen, I'm so sorry but we're stopping service. Everything you've had to eat, drink so far is all on the house. Sir, that thing you have in your hand, put it down! Because if you just seen where it came from like I have, you wouldn't be eating it. Very sorry. Close up. (to Vic) No bill anywhere!
Vic: (interview) I was like "What the hell are you doing?" You can't do that to my customers.
Gordon: By the way, there's your refried beans on the way out. Have a look at them.
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: You can't run a (bleep) restaurant like that!
Vic: You think I'm mad? I'm (bleep) embarrassed now.
Gordon: You should be (bleep) embarrassed. I'm not putting one foot in that place 'til that place is (bleep) cleaned. Yes?
Vic: You're right.
Gordon: Now you start getting those guys cleaning, yes?
Vic: Definitely.
Gordon: Put some (bleep) pride! Do you understand the word pride?!
Vic: Yes.
Gordon: It's not possible for someone to have his head so far up his (bleep). (bleep) me.
Vic: You think I'm mad? I'm (bleep) embarrassed now.
Gordon: You should be (bleep) embarrassed. I'm not putting one foot in that place 'til that place is (bleep) cleaned. Yes?
Vic: You're right.
Gordon: Now you start getting those guys cleaning, yes?
Vic: Definitely.
Gordon: Put some (bleep) pride! Do you understand the word pride?!
Vic: Yes.
Gordon: It's not possible for someone to have his head so far up his (bleep). (bleep) me.
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Narrator: It's an hour into dinner service.
Gordon: (finding a bag of defrosted chicken) Oh my god almighty!
Narrator: And Chef Ramsay has just discovered a lethal mistake, spoiled chicken at Capri.
Gordon: You'll (bleep) kill somebody!
Jim: What am I supposed to say?
Gordon: Take it off the (bleep) menu! (Jim steps out of the kitchen and walks into the dining room.)
Jeff: Jim! Jim!
Jim: Out of the way! (announcing) Ladies and gentlemen! Due to circu-- circumstance, we have no chicken tonight. (Gordon groans) My apology to everyone here. If you just want to have what you're eating now and leave, I understand fully and I apologize.
Gordon: Hey, there may have been a more subtle way of doing that.
Jim: Get out of my way, (Bleep)! We can't get all our chicken orders. We got screwed!
Gordon: Will you stop acting like a baby?
Jim: Oh, grow up you (bleep)!
Gordon: Excuse me?!
Jim: You heard it!
Gordon: Hey, you need a little diaper changing? That time of night?
Jim: I'll give you something!
Gordon: A little poo-poo? Cack your pants?
Jim: (interview) He's the baby. He's the one that's whining over everything. I don't need to hear this crap.
Gordon: Jim, why do you have to behave like this?
Jim: I'm not going to get yelled at!
Gordon: You're acting around like a big baby. I'm just asking you to grow up a little bit! Show a little respect for what you're trying to cook.
Jim: (Bleep) off!
Gordon: Oh my god! You big wet noodle! Do you want a blanket and a bottle?
Jim: Do you need one? Upside the head?
Jeff: Jim, stop
Gordon: (finding a bag of defrosted chicken) Oh my god almighty!
Narrator: And Chef Ramsay has just discovered a lethal mistake, spoiled chicken at Capri.
Gordon: You'll (bleep) kill somebody!
Jim: What am I supposed to say?
Gordon: Take it off the (bleep) menu! (Jim steps out of the kitchen and walks into the dining room.)
Jeff: Jim! Jim!
Jim: Out of the way! (announcing) Ladies and gentlemen! Due to circu-- circumstance, we have no chicken tonight. (Gordon groans) My apology to everyone here. If you just want to have what you're eating now and leave, I understand fully and I apologize.
Gordon: Hey, there may have been a more subtle way of doing that.
Jim: Get out of my way, (Bleep)! We can't get all our chicken orders. We got screwed!
Gordon: Will you stop acting like a baby?
Jim: Oh, grow up you (bleep)!
Gordon: Excuse me?!
Jim: You heard it!
Gordon: Hey, you need a little diaper changing? That time of night?
Jim: I'll give you something!
Gordon: A little poo-poo? Cack your pants?
Jim: (interview) He's the baby. He's the one that's whining over everything. I don't need to hear this crap.
Gordon: Jim, why do you have to behave like this?
Jim: I'm not going to get yelled at!
Gordon: You're acting around like a big baby. I'm just asking you to grow up a little bit! Show a little respect for what you're trying to cook.
Jim: (Bleep) off!
Gordon: Oh my god! You big wet noodle! Do you want a blanket and a bottle?
Jim: Do you need one? Upside the head?
Jeff: Jim, stop
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: (finds a half tomato) Where's that from? That's been sliced. That's gone out. Where's that-- Hey madam, where's that tomato gone?
(the other half is being served on a dish in the dining room.)
Gordon: (digging through the slugs in the tomato.) Look! It's (bleep) rotten, you (bleep) idiot! IT'S ROTTEN!! Has a customer just been served a slice of tomato?!!
Server: No, no, no.
Gordon: So where is it?!!
Andrew: (interview) Oh my god.
(A customer starts eating the other half of the tomato.)
Martin: (interview) Things are looking pretty glum.
(the other half is being served on a dish in the dining room.)
Gordon: (digging through the slugs in the tomato.) Look! It's (bleep) rotten, you (bleep) idiot! IT'S ROTTEN!! Has a customer just been served a slice of tomato?!!
Server: No, no, no.
Gordon: So where is it?!!
Andrew: (interview) Oh my god.
(A customer starts eating the other half of the tomato.)
Martin: (interview) Things are looking pretty glum.
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: No one is getting served from this (bleep) restaurant tonight! Let's make that clear! Yes or no? Anyone against that?
Andrew: No.
Gordon: No, good.
Martin: (interview) That didn't go down too good. He was extremely angry and extremely pissed off.
Gordon: We are not...ever...again serving any of this food. I don't give a (bleep) what anyone says. Can you go and tell them that the kitchen is closed? Right now! Out there and tell them the truth! Tell them now!
Andrew: (interview) Gordon was so outraged. So angry. I've never seen anything like it.
Gordon: (who can be heard in the dining room) FROM GREEN BURGERS, TO (bleep) FURRY CUCUMBERS, TO (bleep) RANCID POTATOES!!!
Andrew: No.
Gordon: No, good.
Martin: (interview) That didn't go down too good. He was extremely angry and extremely pissed off.
Gordon: We are not...ever...again serving any of this food. I don't give a (bleep) what anyone says. Can you go and tell them that the kitchen is closed? Right now! Out there and tell them the truth! Tell them now!
Andrew: (interview) Gordon was so outraged. So angry. I've never seen anything like it.
Gordon: (who can be heard in the dining room) FROM GREEN BURGERS, TO (bleep) FURRY CUCUMBERS, TO (bleep) RANCID POTATOES!!!
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
[The New York Dragons were not on the reservation list thanks to Mike]
Lisa: (interview) The Dragons were supposed to be on that list and Mike just forgot!
Lisa: How is that missed? How is that overlooked?
Mike: Someone-- the dragons just...
Lisa: Mike, that's what I'm saying.
Mike: I'm not sure what transpired.
Lisa: (interview) It was so upsetting. The was no Dragons on there!
Gordon: My god. For me, it's the most important table. That's embarrasing.
Lisa: You're overlooking extremely important things!
Mike: I was not told about the Dragons. I found out...
Lisa: Well, why do you keep saying that?
Mike: (losing it) Because I wasn't!! I wasn't told!!
Lisa: Excuse me, do not talk to me like that!
Mike: I was told at 7: 00 this morning. THAT IT!!! Seriously, I'm pissed off!! DRAGONS ON THE PAPER!!! I'm pissed off!! Not my fault!! Dragons over here, I put them on at 7: 00. COULD WE PLEASE MOVE ON?!!! THAT'S IT!!! NOT MY FAULT!!!
Lisa: (interview) The Dragons were supposed to be on that list and Mike just forgot!
Lisa: How is that missed? How is that overlooked?
Mike: Someone-- the dragons just...
Lisa: Mike, that's what I'm saying.
Mike: I'm not sure what transpired.
Lisa: (interview) It was so upsetting. The was no Dragons on there!
Gordon: My god. For me, it's the most important table. That's embarrasing.
Lisa: You're overlooking extremely important things!
Mike: I was not told about the Dragons. I found out...
Lisa: Well, why do you keep saying that?
Mike: (losing it) Because I wasn't!! I wasn't told!!
Lisa: Excuse me, do not talk to me like that!
Mike: I was told at 7: 00 this morning. THAT IT!!! Seriously, I'm pissed off!! DRAGONS ON THE PAPER!!! I'm pissed off!! Not my fault!! Dragons over here, I put them on at 7: 00. COULD WE PLEASE MOVE ON?!!! THAT'S IT!!! NOT MY FAULT!!!
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: (after tasting the crab cakes) They've got it wrong on the menu. It's not a crab cake. It's a crap cake. Because if I eat anymore, I'll be busy crapping for the next hundred and five years.
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: (finding frozen ravoli that he had for lunch) Bingo. These were my fresh lobster ravoli. Fresh? My (bleep) ass. I've eaten this (bleep)!
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: I've never done that before, close down a restaurant, but that was a (bleep) embarassment. Seascape open? (slams closed sign over open one on sandwich board) Close the (bleep) place.
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: (taking off his jacket.) (Bleep) hell.
Narrator: With the restaurant on the verge of success, Chef Michel is insisting on reverting back to his old ways and Gordon has reached his breaking point.
Michel: Thank you very much.
Gordon: Cut the (bleep). You don't care anymore. Just get straight to the (bleep) answer.
Michel: I'm not cutting no (bleep). I'm just telling it like it is.
Gordon: Get straight to the (bleep) answer.
Michel: Alright? Your menu's not better than mine, you know?
Gordon: You're a donkey.
Michel: My food has been voted best Chef in Ventura county.
Gordon: WHAT?!!!
Michel: Yeah, listen.
Gordon: Hold On, Hold On. Let me finish!! Let me finish!! You put your (bleep) hands up here and listen to me. YOU RUN A (bleep)HOLE OF A KITCHEN!!! (Bleep) YOURSELF!!!
Michel: NO! NO! NO!
Gordon: (furious) (bleep) OFF!!! Who the (bleep) are you to turn around and tell me when you work like a PIG?!!! YOU FRENCH PIG!!!
Michel: Pig?
Gordon: YOU (bleep) PIG!!!! You're a lazy pig! You're so full of (bleep)! Open your eyes! Take a look around.
Michel: Big mouth! You're not happy?
Gordon: I'M (bleep) HAPPY!
Michel: Go on! You can get out!
Gordon: (flips Michel off) (Bleep) YOURSELF!!
Michel: You can get out! It's my (bleep) kitchen!!!
Gordon: Is It? Well it your (bleep) KITCHEN THEN CLEAN IT YOU LAZY (bleep)!!!!!
Michel: (flabbergasted) No.
Narrator: With the restaurant on the verge of success, Chef Michel is insisting on reverting back to his old ways and Gordon has reached his breaking point.
Michel: Thank you very much.
Gordon: Cut the (bleep). You don't care anymore. Just get straight to the (bleep) answer.
Michel: I'm not cutting no (bleep). I'm just telling it like it is.
Gordon: Get straight to the (bleep) answer.
Michel: Alright? Your menu's not better than mine, you know?
Gordon: You're a donkey.
Michel: My food has been voted best Chef in Ventura county.
Gordon: WHAT?!!!
Michel: Yeah, listen.
Gordon: Hold On, Hold On. Let me finish!! Let me finish!! You put your (bleep) hands up here and listen to me. YOU RUN A (bleep)HOLE OF A KITCHEN!!! (Bleep) YOURSELF!!!
Michel: NO! NO! NO!
Gordon: (furious) (bleep) OFF!!! Who the (bleep) are you to turn around and tell me when you work like a PIG?!!! YOU FRENCH PIG!!!
Michel: Pig?
Gordon: YOU (bleep) PIG!!!! You're a lazy pig! You're so full of (bleep)! Open your eyes! Take a look around.
Michel: Big mouth! You're not happy?
Gordon: I'M (bleep) HAPPY!
Michel: Go on! You can get out!
Gordon: (flips Michel off) (Bleep) YOURSELF!!
Michel: You can get out! It's my (bleep) kitchen!!!
Gordon: Is It? Well it your (bleep) KITCHEN THEN CLEAN IT YOU LAZY (bleep)!!!!!
Michel: (flabbergasted) No.
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: A restaurant run by three passionate owners? No chance. Brian, he works two days a week. David, well I don't trust him one little inch. And as for Greg, well he's pissed off at both of them. Basically in a nutshell, Sleepy, Dopey and Grumpy. Who am I? Snow (bleep) White?
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
Gordon: What a beautiful, quaint little town. I can't think of a better way to spend Valentine's Day than at Hannah &... (sees that the sign is missing the N from "Mason's") Maso's? I guess they couldn't afford the "N." That's not a good start.
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares
[Dover sole stuffed with imitation crab meat is being sent back to the kitchen]
Sammy: What's the matter with this?
Waiter: She said it's not fresh, she said it's no good.
Gordon: It's (bleep) watery.
Sammy: Let me have a taste. How bad is it? (tastes it) It's not bad though! It's not bad! It's not bad! (Gordon tastes it and spits it out.) Ohhhh no! Come on! He spits it out. It's not bad.
Gordon: You're (bleep) delusional. It's mushy. It's watery. It's fake.
Sammy: It's not the right crab meat. You're right.
Gordon: And it's (bleep) disgusting. You're jumping up and down like a big (bleep) baboon and "Ho, ho! It's good!" Whoo!
Sammy: What's the matter with this?
Waiter: She said it's not fresh, she said it's no good.
Gordon: It's (bleep) watery.
Sammy: Let me have a taste. How bad is it? (tastes it) It's not bad though! It's not bad! It's not bad! (Gordon tastes it and spits it out.) Ohhhh no! Come on! He spits it out. It's not bad.
Gordon: You're (bleep) delusional. It's mushy. It's watery. It's fake.
Sammy: It's not the right crab meat. You're right.
Gordon: And it's (bleep) disgusting. You're jumping up and down like a big (bleep) baboon and "Ho, ho! It's good!" Whoo!
TV Show: Kitchen Nightmares