Leverage Quotes
Nate: There are three general exceptions for house arrest: personal safety, death of a relative, and family events.
Eliot: Personal safety. We could burn the apartment down.
Parker: [excitedly] Ooh! Ooh!
Eliot: Personal safety. We could burn the apartment down.
Parker: [excitedly] Ooh! Ooh!
TV Show: Leverage
Hardison: Looks like an ordinary cell phone, right? It's not, man. It's a metal detector. See, it uses pulse-induction technology that sends out a current that generates a magnetic field, and then…are you even listening?
Eliot: Yeah.
Hardison: Well, what'd I say?
Eliot: You were explaining how you're still a virgin.
Eliot: Yeah.
Hardison: Well, what'd I say?
Eliot: You were explaining how you're still a virgin.
TV Show: Leverage
Widmark Fowler: I just want someone to like me. Does that get easier when you're a grown-up?
Sophie: [long pause] No, I don't think so.
Widmark: You're nice. But weird.
Sophie: [long pause] No, I don't think so.
Widmark: You're nice. But weird.
TV Show: Leverage
[Sophie has taken the lead on the job, and is explaining it to the team with her usual flair]
Sophie: …and then to protect themselves, they issue an apology to Mr. Pennington, and then they throw Monica Hunter into the jaws of the very media machine that she bent to her own malicious will.
Parker: Wow. I gotta say, Sophie's briefings are much more dramatic.
Eliot: And poetic.
Sophie: …and then to protect themselves, they issue an apology to Mr. Pennington, and then they throw Monica Hunter into the jaws of the very media machine that she bent to her own malicious will.
Parker: Wow. I gotta say, Sophie's briefings are much more dramatic.
Eliot: And poetic.
TV Show: Leverage
Sophie: She has to have corroboration from her own sources, she has to craft the narrative. Monica Hunter has to be the author of her own personal nightmare!
[Nate looks at her in disbelief, then turns to Eliot]
Nate: Do I sound that creepy when I…
Eliot: Hell. Yes.
[Nate looks at her in disbelief, then turns to Eliot]
Nate: Do I sound that creepy when I…
Eliot: Hell. Yes.
TV Show: Leverage
[Hardison is being held at an army base after their mark goes a little too far]
Hardison: [over comms] Get me out of here!
Sophie: Working on it!
Parker: On it! [gets ready to leave]
Sophie: No, no, no, no! You cannot go. You're dead. Monica Hunter sees you and the whole con is blown.
Parker: Right.
Hardison: Damn the con! I am a black man caught on an army base with a video camera! I am going to jail forever!
Hardison: [over comms] Get me out of here!
Sophie: Working on it!
Parker: On it! [gets ready to leave]
Sophie: No, no, no, no! You cannot go. You're dead. Monica Hunter sees you and the whole con is blown.
Parker: Right.
Hardison: Damn the con! I am a black man caught on an army base with a video camera! I am going to jail forever!
TV Show: Leverage
Hardison: [caught on army base] I don't know that white woman. I met her at a bar, she said we was going back to her place. I thought it was a gated community.
TV Show: Leverage
Eliot: [over comms] Hardison, we got a problem.
Hardison: What kind of problem?
Eliot: They're MRI-ing my pizza and their stance says ex-CIA.
Hardison: You can tell somebody worked for the CIA just from how they stand?
Eliot: It's a very distinctive stance!
Hardison: What kind of problem?
Eliot: They're MRI-ing my pizza and their stance says ex-CIA.
Hardison: You can tell somebody worked for the CIA just from how they stand?
Eliot: It's a very distinctive stance!
TV Show: Leverage
[during the pre-con briefing]
Hardison: This is the vice president of the frozen foods division, Erik Casten. Erik with a K, Casten with a C.
Nate: And how is that relevant?
Parker: Oh. Eric with a C? Nice and friendly. Erik with a K? Evil.
Sophie: I didn't know that.
Hardison: This is the vice president of the frozen foods division, Erik Casten. Erik with a K, Casten with a C.
Nate: And how is that relevant?
Parker: Oh. Eric with a C? Nice and friendly. Erik with a K? Evil.
Sophie: I didn't know that.
TV Show: Leverage
[Hardison shows off his hacking skills using a cell phone]
Parker: You picked his pockets without stealing anything. Cool.
Hardison: It's what I do. A man, a phone, no limits.
Eliot: A man, a phone, no action. Come on, man, you left that out there like a hanging curve ball!
Parker: You picked his pockets without stealing anything. Cool.
Hardison: It's what I do. A man, a phone, no limits.
Eliot: A man, a phone, no action. Come on, man, you left that out there like a hanging curve ball!
TV Show: Leverage
[last lines: after the job, Eliot and Sophie talk about Nate]
Eliot: He's fine. We practically had to beg him to come back, all right? He's not drinking, he's at the top of his game. I gotta be honest with you, I can't even believe we pulled this one off.
Sophie: Well, that's the problem. He keeps winning. Every time he wins, he believes a little bit more that he can control…life.
Eliot: It's what gets him through the day.
Sophie: What happens when he loses? Last time he lost, it broke him. He breaks again, I don't think even we could pick up the pieces.
Eliot: He's fine. We practically had to beg him to come back, all right? He's not drinking, he's at the top of his game. I gotta be honest with you, I can't even believe we pulled this one off.
Sophie: Well, that's the problem. He keeps winning. Every time he wins, he believes a little bit more that he can control…life.
Eliot: It's what gets him through the day.
Sophie: What happens when he loses? Last time he lost, it broke him. He breaks again, I don't think even we could pick up the pieces.
TV Show: Leverage
[the team is trying to deal with a bomb sent to Sophie]
Parker: Is that C4?
Sophie: Ohh, Parker! Please don't poke at the motion-sensitive bomb!
Parker: Is that C4?
Sophie: Ohh, Parker! Please don't poke at the motion-sensitive bomb!
TV Show: Leverage
[after Sophie's "funeral"]
Sophie: Those were some nice things you said at my funeral.
Hardison: We trust Nate to make sure the plan works. We trust you to make sure we're all okay.
Sophie: Those were some nice things you said at my funeral.
Hardison: We trust Nate to make sure the plan works. We trust you to make sure we're all okay.
TV Show: Leverage
[Parker is staring intently at Sophie]
Sophie: Stop it.
Parker: It's like you're haunting us.
Sophie: Parker, I'm not really dead. [Parker reaches to check her pulse] I'm not dead!
Sophie: Stop it.
Parker: It's like you're haunting us.
Sophie: Parker, I'm not really dead. [Parker reaches to check her pulse] I'm not dead!
TV Show: Leverage
[Hardison and Chaos jump out of their vans and stare each other down]
Hardison: Chaos. I heard you were in jail. Guess I was wrong.
Chaos: Hardison. I heard you sucked. Guess I was right.
Hardison: Chaos. I heard you were in jail. Guess I was wrong.
Chaos: Hardison. I heard you sucked. Guess I was right.
TV Show: Leverage
[after their first face-to-face encounter with Marcus Starke's team]
Hardison: You were scared to fight a girl.
Eliot: She'd mop the floor with you, Hardison.
Hardison: I don't care.
Eliot: Seriously, she actually killed a guy once with a mop. Funny story, actually. She broke the mop and took…
Hardison: You were scared to fight a girl.
Eliot: She'd mop the floor with you, Hardison.
Hardison: I don't care.
Eliot: Seriously, she actually killed a guy once with a mop. Funny story, actually. She broke the mop and took…
TV Show: Leverage
Sophie: Go to Nate's storage cupboard. You're gonna find a sexy little minidress and my emergency Jimmy Choos.
Parker: Jimmy who? You have a body in Nate's closet?
Sophie: Shoes, Parker!
Parker: Jimmy who? You have a body in Nate's closet?
Sophie: Shoes, Parker!
TV Show: Leverage
(Eliot is posing as store security, Hardison is posing as a British thief hired by Russians, who are watching them from outside)
Eliot: (as Hardison pretends to punch him to the floor) Next time, I get to be the thief.
Hardison: I'd like to see you do an accent.
Eliot: (irritated, as he takes another 'punch') I'd like to see you do an accent!
Eliot: (as Hardison pretends to punch him to the floor) Next time, I get to be the thief.
Hardison: I'd like to see you do an accent.
Eliot: (irritated, as he takes another 'punch') I'd like to see you do an accent!
TV Show: Leverage
Kerrity: What part of "get the hell out of my office" don't you understand?
Nate: Mr. Kerrity, I'm in insurance. If you think I've never been threatened by a gun before, you're mistaken.
Nate: Mr. Kerrity, I'm in insurance. If you think I've never been threatened by a gun before, you're mistaken.
TV Show: Leverage
Tara Carlisle: I checked you out, Mr. Ford. Half my sources say you're a vicious thief. The other half claim you're some kind of high-tech vigilante.
Nate: I like that. I should put that on my card.
Nate: I like that. I should put that on my card.
TV Show: Leverage
Tara: Look, Blanchard's here at the same time you are. That's a coincidence.
Nate: No, no, we hacked into his online appointment schedule. I mean, yes, what a coincidence.
Nate: No, no, we hacked into his online appointment schedule. I mean, yes, what a coincidence.
TV Show: Leverage
[Tara talks to Sophie via video conference]
Tara: Nate Ford is arrogant, he's condescending, he just doesn't listen.
Sophie: Nate's having trouble communicating? I'm shocked.
Tara: Nate Ford is arrogant, he's condescending, he just doesn't listen.
Sophie: Nate's having trouble communicating? I'm shocked.
TV Show: Leverage
[laying out the first part of the con]
Nate: We need a Caprina. [walks away]
Tara: W-what does that…So he just says things and walks away?
Parker: Yeah, you're gonna have to get used to that.
Nate: We need a Caprina. [walks away]
Tara: W-what does that…So he just says things and walks away?
Parker: Yeah, you're gonna have to get used to that.
TV Show: Leverage
Parker: These clothes are totally impractical, okay? There's no range of motion, limited concealment options, and this reflective material would set off a motion detector a mile away.
Eliot: It's a fashion show, not Thieves-R-Us!
Eliot: It's a fashion show, not Thieves-R-Us!
TV Show: Leverage
[after Sophie convinces the others to give Tara a chance]
Eliot: She is hot.
Hardison: Very hot.
Parker: Hot.
[everybody looks at Parker]
Parker: Warm? Cold? Why are we staring?
Eliot: She is hot.
Hardison: Very hot.
Parker: Hot.
[everybody looks at Parker]
Parker: Warm? Cold? Why are we staring?
TV Show: Leverage
Tara: What are we supposed to do, steal the wake?
Nate: Whoa, have some respect. Borrow the wake, to save the bar.
Nate: Whoa, have some respect. Borrow the wake, to save the bar.
TV Show: Leverage
Parker: What kind of crook was your dad?
Hardison: Parker, you just…
Nate: He ran numbers.
Eliot: Let me get this straight. You stop stealing, you stop drinking, and you move upstairs from a thief bar?
Parker: He did. I get that. You don't get that? Why does nobody else get that?
Hardison: Parker, you just…
Nate: He ran numbers.
Eliot: Let me get this straight. You stop stealing, you stop drinking, and you move upstairs from a thief bar?
Parker: He did. I get that. You don't get that? Why does nobody else get that?
TV Show: Leverage