Monk Quote
[Randy has been disguised as Matthew Teeger's mother as part of a sting operation, with Monk, Stottlemeyer and a technician handling the operation from the back of a van]
Police Technician: Tape is rolling. [sneezes] Could you hand me a Kleenex? [Monk hands him one]
Adrian Monk: Kills 99.9% of all cold and flu viruses. Only 99.9. [A scratching noise is emitted over the wire]
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Randy, what are you doing?
[Cuts to upstairs, where Randy, dressed in drag and a gray wig and sitting in a rocking chair, is adjusting his bra]
Lt. Randall Disher: My bra's itching. How do they walk around in this stuff?
Police Technician: This is a new low.
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Actually, it's not a new low. That's the sad part.
Lt. Randall Disher: [through his wire] He's never gonna buy this.
Adrian Monk: Dr. Kroger thinks he will. Matthew Teeger has suffered a pure psychotic break, he's in complete denial. His mother never died, not to him.
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: The important thing is that we keep him talking.
Lt. Randall Disher: What if he has a knife?
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: He's right. We need a code, a phrase, in case he's in trouble.
Lt. Randall Disher: Uh, how about, "Mother of God, he has a knife!"?
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: No it has to be covert. It has to sound conversational, sound natural.
Adrian Monk: How about this: "I wish there were ten of them."
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Ten of what?
Adrian Monk: Of anything.
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Well, you see, Monk. I don't think anyone would say that.
Lt. Randall Disher: I've heard peo
Police Technician: Tape is rolling. [sneezes] Could you hand me a Kleenex? [Monk hands him one]
Adrian Monk: Kills 99.9% of all cold and flu viruses. Only 99.9. [A scratching noise is emitted over the wire]
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Randy, what are you doing?
[Cuts to upstairs, where Randy, dressed in drag and a gray wig and sitting in a rocking chair, is adjusting his bra]
Lt. Randall Disher: My bra's itching. How do they walk around in this stuff?
Police Technician: This is a new low.
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Actually, it's not a new low. That's the sad part.
Lt. Randall Disher: [through his wire] He's never gonna buy this.
Adrian Monk: Dr. Kroger thinks he will. Matthew Teeger has suffered a pure psychotic break, he's in complete denial. His mother never died, not to him.
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: The important thing is that we keep him talking.
Lt. Randall Disher: What if he has a knife?
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: He's right. We need a code, a phrase, in case he's in trouble.
Lt. Randall Disher: Uh, how about, "Mother of God, he has a knife!"?
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: No it has to be covert. It has to sound conversational, sound natural.
Adrian Monk: How about this: "I wish there were ten of them."
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Ten of what?
Adrian Monk: Of anything.
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Well, you see, Monk. I don't think anyone would say that.
Lt. Randall Disher: I've heard peo
TV Show: Monk
