Napoleon Quotes
Don: Hey, Napoleon. What did you do last summer again?
Napoleon Dynamite: I told you! I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines!
Don: Did you shoot any?
Napoleon Dynamite: Yes, like 50 of 'em! They kept trying to attack my cousins, what the heck would you do in a situation like that?
Don: What kind of gun did you use?
Napoleon Dynamite: A freakin' 12-gauge, what do you think?
Napoleon Dynamite: I told you! I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines!
Don: Did you shoot any?
Napoleon Dynamite: Yes, like 50 of 'em! They kept trying to attack my cousins, what the heck would you do in a situation like that?
Don: What kind of gun did you use?
Napoleon Dynamite: A freakin' 12-gauge, what do you think?
Movie: Napoleon
Napoleon Dynamite: [Napoleon sits down with Pedro at lunch] Where have you been?
Pedro: I was *seek*.
Napoleon Dynamite: Has Summer said anything to you yet?
Pedro: No, not yet.
Napoleon Dynamite: Well, she said no.
Pedro: She did? [Pedro thinks a second]
Pedro: Well, what about that other girl?
Napoleon Dynamite: What other girl?
Pedro: The one that left all that crap on your porch.
Napoleon Dynamite: You mean Deb?
Pedro: Yes her.
Napoleon Dynamite: What about her?
Pedro: Well, I asked her out too.
Napoleon Dynamite: What?
Pedro: I was *seek*.
Napoleon Dynamite: Has Summer said anything to you yet?
Pedro: No, not yet.
Napoleon Dynamite: Well, she said no.
Pedro: She did? [Pedro thinks a second]
Pedro: Well, what about that other girl?
Napoleon Dynamite: What other girl?
Pedro: The one that left all that crap on your porch.
Napoleon Dynamite: You mean Deb?
Pedro: Yes her.
Napoleon Dynamite: What about her?
Pedro: Well, I asked her out too.
Napoleon Dynamite: What?
Movie: Napoleon
Napoleon Dynamite: Hey can I use your guys's phone for a sec?
Secretary No. 1: Is there anything wrong?
Napoleon Dynamite: I don't feel very good. [takes telephone and dials number]
Kip: [making nachos on the other side of the line] Hi.
Napoleon Dynamite: Is grandma there?
Kip: No, she's getting her hair done.
Napoleon Dynamite: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...
Kip: What do you need?
Napoleon Dynamite: Can you just go get her for me?
Kip: I'm really busy right now.
Napoleon Dynamite: Just tell her to come get me.
Kip: Why?
Napoleon Dynamite: Cause I don't feel good!
Kip: Well, have you talked to the school nurse?
Napoleon Dynamite: No, she doesn't know anything. Will you just come get me?
Kip: No.
Napoleon Dynamite: Well, will you do me a favor then? Can you bring me my chapstick?
Kip: No, Napoleon.
Napoleon Dynamite: But my lips hurt real bad!
Kip: Just borrow some from the school nurse. I know she has like five sticks in her drawer.
Napoleon Dynamite: I'm not gonna use hers, you sicko!
Kip: See ya. [Kip hangs up]
Napoleon Dynamite: Uh! Idiot!
Secretary No. 1: Is there anything wrong?
Napoleon Dynamite: I don't feel very good. [takes telephone and dials number]
Kip: [making nachos on the other side of the line] Hi.
Napoleon Dynamite: Is grandma there?
Kip: No, she's getting her hair done.
Napoleon Dynamite: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...
Kip: What do you need?
Napoleon Dynamite: Can you just go get her for me?
Kip: I'm really busy right now.
Napoleon Dynamite: Just tell her to come get me.
Kip: Why?
Napoleon Dynamite: Cause I don't feel good!
Kip: Well, have you talked to the school nurse?
Napoleon Dynamite: No, she doesn't know anything. Will you just come get me?
Kip: No.
Napoleon Dynamite: Well, will you do me a favor then? Can you bring me my chapstick?
Kip: No, Napoleon.
Napoleon Dynamite: But my lips hurt real bad!
Kip: Just borrow some from the school nurse. I know she has like five sticks in her drawer.
Napoleon Dynamite: I'm not gonna use hers, you sicko!
Kip: See ya. [Kip hangs up]
Napoleon Dynamite: Uh! Idiot!
Movie: Napoleon
Pedro: Who was that?
Napoleon Dynamite: Trisha.
Pedro: Who's she?
Napoleon Dynamite: My woman I'm taking to the dance.
Pedro: Did you draw her a picture?
Napoleon Dynamite: Heck yes I did.
Napoleon Dynamite: Trisha.
Pedro: Who's she?
Napoleon Dynamite: My woman I'm taking to the dance.
Pedro: Did you draw her a picture?
Napoleon Dynamite: Heck yes I did.
Movie: Napoleon
Randy: Hey, give me 50 cents so I can buy a pop.
Bullied Kid: I don't have any, Randy.
Randy: C'mon, I'll pay you back.
Bullied Kid: I don't have... [Randy grabs him by the back of the neck and starts yanking up and down on it]
Randy: I'll do this to you...
Bullied Kid: Don't! Stop! Stop! Don't! Ow. Here, here. [Randy grabs the money and walks away]
Napoleon Dynamite: [Napoleon, who's been watching, walks up to the kid] How's your neck?
Bullied Kid: Stings.
Napoleon Dynamite: That's too bad. [Napoleon offers him a boondoggle key-chain]
Napoleon Dynamite: Pedro offers you his protection. [Cut to next scene - the bullied kid is taking his bike off a rack and Randy walks up]
Randy: Hey, let me borrow your bike.
Bullied Kid: No.
Randy: C'mon, I'll give you some chips.
Bullied Kid: No! [They continue to struggle over the bike] Cholo No. 1, Cholo #2: [drive up in their low-rider convertible, that has "Vote 4 Pedro" painted on the door. The driver shakes his head 'no' with a threatening look on his face. Randy gives up and walks away from the kid. The bullied kid smiles]
Bullied Kid: I don't have any, Randy.
Randy: C'mon, I'll pay you back.
Bullied Kid: I don't have... [Randy grabs him by the back of the neck and starts yanking up and down on it]
Randy: I'll do this to you...
Bullied Kid: Don't! Stop! Stop! Don't! Ow. Here, here. [Randy grabs the money and walks away]
Napoleon Dynamite: [Napoleon, who's been watching, walks up to the kid] How's your neck?
Bullied Kid: Stings.
Napoleon Dynamite: That's too bad. [Napoleon offers him a boondoggle key-chain]
Napoleon Dynamite: Pedro offers you his protection. [Cut to next scene - the bullied kid is taking his bike off a rack and Randy walks up]
Randy: Hey, let me borrow your bike.
Bullied Kid: No.
Randy: C'mon, I'll give you some chips.
Bullied Kid: No! [They continue to struggle over the bike] Cholo No. 1, Cholo #2: [drive up in their low-rider convertible, that has "Vote 4 Pedro" painted on the door. The driver shakes his head 'no' with a threatening look on his face. Randy gives up and walks away from the kid. The bullied kid smiles]
Movie: Napoleon
Uncle Rico: I wish you wouldn't look at me like that, Napoleon.
Napoleon Dynamite: I wish you'd get out of my life and shut up!
Uncle Rico: I'm gonna tell you somethin' right now. While you're out there playing patty cake with your friend Pedro, your Uncle Rico is makin' 120 bucks.
Napoleon Dynamite: I could make that much money in five seconds!
Kip: Geez. Yeah right, Napoleon. I made, like, 75 bucks today.
Uncle Rico: Napoleon, it's looks like you don't have a job. So why don't you get out there and feed Tina.
Napoleon Dynamite: Why don't you go eat a decroded piece of crap!
Napoleon Dynamite: I wish you'd get out of my life and shut up!
Uncle Rico: I'm gonna tell you somethin' right now. While you're out there playing patty cake with your friend Pedro, your Uncle Rico is makin' 120 bucks.
Napoleon Dynamite: I could make that much money in five seconds!
Kip: Geez. Yeah right, Napoleon. I made, like, 75 bucks today.
Uncle Rico: Napoleon, it's looks like you don't have a job. So why don't you get out there and feed Tina.
Napoleon Dynamite: Why don't you go eat a decroded piece of crap!
Movie: Napoleon