Norman Rockwell Is Bleeding Quotes
Chris Titus: The Los Angeles Times reported that sixty-three percent of American families are now considered dysfunctional. Good. 'Cause that means when Armageddon *really* happens, thirty-seven percent of this population is going to *lose their minds*. Oh my God, the world is over! Us sixty-three percent? We're going to go, Hey... there's no one watching the Lexus dealership! We're going to the Apocalypse with leather and a CD changer! You guys have been great. Thank you.
TV Show: Norman Rockwell Is Bleeding
[about his mother]
Chris Titus: Without her I don't exist. Without her, I wouldn't be doing this for a living. Without her, in four states, it would still be legal to kill a man with a cappuccino machine. She touched a lot of lives. Diagnosed manic depressive schizophreinc. Actually, it was pretty cool as a kid, 'cause I never really knew *who* was coming to dinner. But I was pretty sure they were going to be bummed out. It used to piss my teachers off. All my permission slips had different signatures on them. [Laughter]
Chris Titus: Okay, Mr. Smart Ass, why don't you stand up? Who's this one supposed to be? [as a whining kid]
Chris Titus: It's my mom. [Laughs]
Chris Titus: Call her. But let me listen, let me listen, let me listen! I'll bet my lunch money she's Wheezy Jefferson today.
Chris Titus: Without her I don't exist. Without her, I wouldn't be doing this for a living. Without her, in four states, it would still be legal to kill a man with a cappuccino machine. She touched a lot of lives. Diagnosed manic depressive schizophreinc. Actually, it was pretty cool as a kid, 'cause I never really knew *who* was coming to dinner. But I was pretty sure they were going to be bummed out. It used to piss my teachers off. All my permission slips had different signatures on them. [Laughter]
Chris Titus: Okay, Mr. Smart Ass, why don't you stand up? Who's this one supposed to be? [as a whining kid]
Chris Titus: It's my mom. [Laughs]
Chris Titus: Call her. But let me listen, let me listen, let me listen! I'll bet my lunch money she's Wheezy Jefferson today.
TV Show: Norman Rockwell Is Bleeding