Psych Quotes
Clive: Hi, I'm Clive. I'm hilarious and I have no girlfriend.
Juliet: Hi, I'm Juliet and I'm a cop.
Clive: Nice rejection. Very clean.
Juliet: Hi, I'm Juliet and I'm a cop.
Clive: Nice rejection. Very clean.
TV Show: Psych
Shawn: You two are officially my least favorite tag team of all time!
Clive: Really? With Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff on the table?
Shawn: Wow! You just made that reference!
Clive: Really? With Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff on the table?
Shawn: Wow! You just made that reference!
TV Show: Psych
[Shawn's piñata has been nailed to the door with a noose around it]
Shawn: Take that down. Children walk by here every day, carrying their hopes and dreams.
Shawn: Take that down. Children walk by here every day, carrying their hopes and dreams.
TV Show: Psych
Shawn: What's your point, man?
Gus: My point is you're going to be eighty years old and still shamelessly hitting on waitresses. Is that what you want?
Shawn: Is that a trick question?
Gus: My point is you're going to be eighty years old and still shamelessly hitting on waitresses. Is that what you want?
Shawn: Is that a trick question?
TV Show: Psych
Mary: [upon being asked why he's a guy named Mary] My father's name was Mary and his father before him was named Mary and his father before him was named Craig.
TV Show: Psych
Lassiter: Are you in my apartment?
Shawn: Please. I haven't snuck into your apartment for weeks. Which reminds me, we're all out of peanut butter.
Shawn: Please. I haven't snuck into your apartment for weeks. Which reminds me, we're all out of peanut butter.
TV Show: Psych
Shawn: Here's the thing, Robert: I am a psychic.
Gus: We work for the Santa Barbara Police Department. We've solved over forty-seven cases. I'm also a pharmaceutical rep, if that means anything to you.
Shawn: You've seen The Mentalist, right?
Robert: Yes.
Shawn: It's like that.
Gus: Except that guy's a fake.
Shawn: Right. If I were a fake psychic, it would be eerily similar.
Gus: Exactly the same.
Shawn: A virtual carbon copy.
Gus: We work for the Santa Barbara Police Department. We've solved over forty-seven cases. I'm also a pharmaceutical rep, if that means anything to you.
Shawn: You've seen The Mentalist, right?
Robert: Yes.
Shawn: It's like that.
Gus: Except that guy's a fake.
Shawn: Right. If I were a fake psychic, it would be eerily similar.
Gus: Exactly the same.
Shawn: A virtual carbon copy.
TV Show: Psych
Shawn: [writing list on napkin] Okay, here's what I'm going to do. First, I'm going to get me some of that maple candy that everyone seems to be raving about. Then, I'm going to purchase myself a walking stick. Preferably something with a ram's head carved into the handle. And finally, we're going to catch ourselves an international art thief. I'm not saying I'm sure it's going to be you, but right now, you're the top of the list.
TV Show: Psych
Shawn: I'm so sorry about this; my assistant makes all my reservations but she's been under heavy medication. She was recently diagnosed with parvo.
Hotel Clerk: Isn't that a dog's disease?
Shawn: Yes, yes it is. My assistant is a Golden Retriever, adorable but dim. Her whole keyboard is just three big buttons. She has very large paws. I should have fired her years ago but she's a rescue and I didn't have the heart.
Hotel Clerk: Isn't that a dog's disease?
Shawn: Yes, yes it is. My assistant is a Golden Retriever, adorable but dim. Her whole keyboard is just three big buttons. She has very large paws. I should have fired her years ago but she's a rescue and I didn't have the heart.
TV Show: Psych
Shawn: I want to see your book.
Robert: My book?
Shawn: Yeah, the one with things that Despereaux might steal.
Robert: But nobody ever wants to see my book.
Shawn: I do; I want to see the book. [Takes waffles off of desk] I'm also going to eat these waffles.
Robert: My book?
Shawn: Yeah, the one with things that Despereaux might steal.
Robert: But nobody ever wants to see my book.
Shawn: I do; I want to see the book. [Takes waffles off of desk] I'm also going to eat these waffles.
TV Show: Psych
Shawn: [talking about the ATVs] Note to self: Get one of those for the office.
Gus: I hope you have a plan to help us find this crashed plane. And hope that plan doesn't end up with us being eaten by a bear.
Shawn: Don't worry, Gus. We have a secret weapon.
Gus: A larger bear-eating bear?
Shawn: BOOM!
Gus: A map! That's your secret weapon?
Gus: I hope you have a plan to help us find this crashed plane. And hope that plan doesn't end up with us being eaten by a bear.
Shawn: Don't worry, Gus. We have a secret weapon.
Gus: A larger bear-eating bear?
Shawn: BOOM!
Gus: A map! That's your secret weapon?
TV Show: Psych
Shawn: No, no, Mr. Clayton! Open your eyes!
Gus: Watch out, Shawn! I know what to do. Mr. Clayton! Mr. Clayton! What interesting sectors do you see outperforming the market this year?
Gus: Watch out, Shawn! I know what to do. Mr. Clayton! Mr. Clayton! What interesting sectors do you see outperforming the market this year?
TV Show: Psych
Shawn: Mrs. Clayton, I'm receiving a psychic transmission from your husband. Really more of a voice mail. Status update. Perhaps a Twitter.
Gus: I believe it's called a tweet.
Shawn: I'm not saying that.
Gus: I believe it's called a tweet.
Shawn: I'm not saying that.
TV Show: Psych
Nyna Clayton: You believe in karma, don't you?
Shawn: Yes, but that's only because we are karma chameleons.
Gus: We come and go.
Shawn: Yes, but that's only because we are karma chameleons.
Gus: We come and go.
TV Show: Psych
Shawn: Have you ever seen this ghost?
Hank: Nope, but I've felt them.
Shawn: Was that in an appropriate way?
Hank: Nope, but I've felt them.
Shawn: Was that in an appropriate way?
TV Show: Psych
Hank: Hell, I wasn't even gonna call you out here but Binky insisted.
Gus: Binky?
Hank: Oh. You don't call him Binky?
Shawn: We do now!
Lassiter: Sheriff Hank, why don't you tell the boys here what the problem been here.
Hank: Well, it started out as simple vandalism. Somebody's been stealing our wood from sidewalks, buildings, fence posts.
Shawn: Wood thieves. My first instinct is beavers, but I'm not willing to rule out those pesky Keebler elves.
Gus: Binky?
Hank: Oh. You don't call him Binky?
Shawn: We do now!
Lassiter: Sheriff Hank, why don't you tell the boys here what the problem been here.
Hank: Well, it started out as simple vandalism. Somebody's been stealing our wood from sidewalks, buildings, fence posts.
Shawn: Wood thieves. My first instinct is beavers, but I'm not willing to rule out those pesky Keebler elves.
TV Show: Psych
Lassiter: What the hell is going on here?
Shawn: This is called 19-card stud.
Gus: Regular poker is too complicated. It makes it easier to get pairs.
Shawn: Plus anything with a picture is wild.
Lassiter: Why aren't you two out interviewing suspects, or feeling the walls, or whatever the hell it is you do? At least do something!
Shawn: Man, I tried. I did. These people are kind of mean. It's a tough racket being sheriff, Lassie. Besides, I gotta go gun down that Stinky Feet fellow in about 20 minutes.
Gus: Stinky Pete.
Shawn: You wouldn't understand; you've never killed a man.
Lassiter: Yes, I have.
Shawn: Yeah, but you've never pretended to kill one. Repeatedly. I struggle with it every time.
Gus: Two times now.
Shawn: Yep, both times.
Shawn: This is called 19-card stud.
Gus: Regular poker is too complicated. It makes it easier to get pairs.
Shawn: Plus anything with a picture is wild.
Lassiter: Why aren't you two out interviewing suspects, or feeling the walls, or whatever the hell it is you do? At least do something!
Shawn: Man, I tried. I did. These people are kind of mean. It's a tough racket being sheriff, Lassie. Besides, I gotta go gun down that Stinky Feet fellow in about 20 minutes.
Gus: Stinky Pete.
Shawn: You wouldn't understand; you've never killed a man.
Lassiter: Yes, I have.
Shawn: Yeah, but you've never pretended to kill one. Repeatedly. I struggle with it every time.
Gus: Two times now.
Shawn: Yep, both times.
TV Show: Psych
Lassiter: Well, while you two were sitting here playing Cowboys and Indians...
Shawn: Uh, uh, just Cowboys, Lassie.
Gus: Injuns is offensive.
Lassiter: I didn't say Injuns, Guster.
Gus: That's what I heard.
Shawn: Me too.
Shawn: Uh, uh, just Cowboys, Lassie.
Gus: Injuns is offensive.
Lassiter: I didn't say Injuns, Guster.
Gus: That's what I heard.
Shawn: Me too.
TV Show: Psych
Gus: [grabbing his cell phone] I'm out of here. I'm calling a cab.
Sheriff Mendel: Well, those things don't work out here. We got no TVs, no radio, no refrigerators.
Gus: Sounds like prison. Except they have all those things.
Sheriff Mendel: Well, those things don't work out here. We got no TVs, no radio, no refrigerators.
Gus: Sounds like prison. Except they have all those things.
TV Show: Psych
Lassiter: Kiss my sweet... [nun walks by] ...love biscuits.
Gus: I don't know if you made that any less offensive.
Gus: I don't know if you made that any less offensive.
TV Show: Psych
Shawn: I look up to Brett Favre, but that doesn't mean I believe everything he says. [pauses] All right, that's a bad example. It's those tearful press conferences, man. They get me every time.
TV Show: Psych
Gus: Do you think it could be PTSD?
Shawn: I think it's slightly more serious than a mere menstrual issue.
Shawn: I think it's slightly more serious than a mere menstrual issue.
TV Show: Psych
Shawn: [in confession] I've been stealing food that Gus hides in his desk and eating it and then blaming it on the cleaning lady Oniniña.
Gus: I knew it, I knew it!
Gus: I knew it, I knew it!
TV Show: Psych
Shawn: What are you saying? That he has a hunch based on unverifiable information?
Gus: That's what you use to solve every case!
Shawn: Okay, that stinks. It's true, though.
Gus: That's what you use to solve every case!
Shawn: Okay, that stinks. It's true, though.
TV Show: Psych
Shawn: What else did he say?
Gus: He did say he's been getting strength through a particular proverb...
Shawn: Alright, fine, let's do a quick list: 'You can't each an old dogs new tricks', 'A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush', 'If it's brown flush it down...'
Gus: He did say he's been getting strength through a particular proverb...
Shawn: Alright, fine, let's do a quick list: 'You can't each an old dogs new tricks', 'A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush', 'If it's brown flush it down...'
TV Show: Psych