Red vs. Blue Quote
Sarge: Grif, Simmons, where've you two been?
Simmons: Our patrol didn't go exactly as planned, Sarge.
Sarge: Did you find something? Wait a minute, where's the jeep?
Grif: Yeah...it's like this...
Sarge: Grif, I just built that jeep. I don't want to hear that it's been destroyed.
Grif: Oh, well then maybe I should stop talking. Or you can stop listening.
Sarge: Grif!
Simmons: No no no, it's not destroyed Sarge. The engine just quit.
Sarge: And what exactly were you doing when the engine died?
Grif: Duh, getting the jeep outta the ditch.
Sarge: What was the jeep doing in a ditch?
Grif: Well I can tell you what it wasn't doing, and that's reenacting the coolest scene from The Dukes of Hazzard ever. [Sarge moans in exasperation.] Simmons was driving.
Simmons: No I wasn't! I was holding the arrows and the dynamite!
[The three of them check out the Warthog.]
Sarge: Wait a second, this thing isn't busted. It's just outta gas.
Grif: It runs on gas?
Sarge: Of course not, moron. Where are we gonna get gasoline? I modified the fuel cells to utilize a form of cold fission, powered by solar energy.
Simmons: So then why is it dead, sir?
Sarge: You would have had to park it in the shade for at least two hours. What were you doing parked in the shade for two hours?
Grif: Well, I can tell you what we weren't doing...
Sarge: Ah, forget it.
Simmons: Our patrol didn't go exactly as planned, Sarge.
Sarge: Did you find something? Wait a minute, where's the jeep?
Grif: Yeah...it's like this...
Sarge: Grif, I just built that jeep. I don't want to hear that it's been destroyed.
Grif: Oh, well then maybe I should stop talking. Or you can stop listening.
Sarge: Grif!
Simmons: No no no, it's not destroyed Sarge. The engine just quit.
Sarge: And what exactly were you doing when the engine died?
Grif: Duh, getting the jeep outta the ditch.
Sarge: What was the jeep doing in a ditch?
Grif: Well I can tell you what it wasn't doing, and that's reenacting the coolest scene from The Dukes of Hazzard ever. [Sarge moans in exasperation.] Simmons was driving.
Simmons: No I wasn't! I was holding the arrows and the dynamite!
[The three of them check out the Warthog.]
Sarge: Wait a second, this thing isn't busted. It's just outta gas.
Grif: It runs on gas?
Sarge: Of course not, moron. Where are we gonna get gasoline? I modified the fuel cells to utilize a form of cold fission, powered by solar energy.
Simmons: So then why is it dead, sir?
Sarge: You would have had to park it in the shade for at least two hours. What were you doing parked in the shade for two hours?
Grif: Well, I can tell you what we weren't doing...
Sarge: Ah, forget it.
TV Show: Red vs. Blue
