Rescue Me Quotes
Franco: You don't do that, Sean. You don't bang a guy's girlfriend, ex-girlfriend, wife, ex-wife, or his sister without his permission. And I mean crystal-goddamn-clear permission.
Sean: You haven't even spoken to her, in like, five years.
Franco: Guys?
Tommy: You broke the rules.
Lou: Big time.
Sean: Wh--? Ho-- How? Explain to me how. [Lou interrupts him] Let me finish my -- [Lou interrupts him again] Can I at least-- [Lou interrupts him]
Tommy: Look, you run into a guy's ex-girlfriend in a bar and feel her up.
Lou: Yes.
Tommy: You can be in a bar, meet a guy's ex-wife, and...
Lou: [makes circular gestures on his chest] Titty action.
Tommy: A little bit of titty action. You can even grab guy's sister's ass in a bar that the guy actually happens to be in.
Lou: Yes, you could.
Tommy: And it's all explainable under the giant umbrella of the huge, 'Sorry-I-Was-Drunk' rule.
Lou: Like Visa and Mastercard, accepted the world over and never argued.
Tommy: Never argued. Which was why the rule was created by the way, by the... Romans?
Lou: Ah, even earlier than that, my friend: the Druids.
Sean: Listen, Franco didn't want to have anything to do with her.
Lou: He just doesn't get it.
Tommy: [counting on his fingers]: Look, girlfriend, ex-girlfriend, wife, ex-wife, sister, half-sister: [sweeps his hands] No pussy!
Sean: You haven't even spoken to her, in like, five years.
Franco: Guys?
Tommy: You broke the rules.
Lou: Big time.
Sean: Wh--? Ho-- How? Explain to me how. [Lou interrupts him] Let me finish my -- [Lou interrupts him again] Can I at least-- [Lou interrupts him]
Tommy: Look, you run into a guy's ex-girlfriend in a bar and feel her up.
Lou: Yes.
Tommy: You can be in a bar, meet a guy's ex-wife, and...
Lou: [makes circular gestures on his chest] Titty action.
Tommy: A little bit of titty action. You can even grab guy's sister's ass in a bar that the guy actually happens to be in.
Lou: Yes, you could.
Tommy: And it's all explainable under the giant umbrella of the huge, 'Sorry-I-Was-Drunk' rule.
Lou: Like Visa and Mastercard, accepted the world over and never argued.
Tommy: Never argued. Which was why the rule was created by the way, by the... Romans?
Lou: Ah, even earlier than that, my friend: the Druids.
Sean: Listen, Franco didn't want to have anything to do with her.
Lou: He just doesn't get it.
Tommy: [counting on his fingers]: Look, girlfriend, ex-girlfriend, wife, ex-wife, sister, half-sister: [sweeps his hands] No pussy!
TV Show: Rescue Me
Tommy: [to Janet, about Colleen] Did you even know she was going to the city with the Murphy Kid that night, let alone joyriding around Manhattan with him? And I'll bet my left nut that that kid's on drugs. Did you hear what I said? I said my left nut, which just happens to be my favorite nut.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Guy: Are you Tommy Gavin?
Tommy: Yeah, who's askin'?
Guy: We're Roger's friends.
Tommy: Well, that's your problem, not mine. [the three guys form a circle around him] What? What are you guys gonna do? Audit me? [they beat him up]
Tommy: Yeah, who's askin'?
Guy: We're Roger's friends.
Tommy: Well, that's your problem, not mine. [the three guys form a circle around him] What? What are you guys gonna do? Audit me? [they beat him up]
TV Show: Rescue Me
Lou: How many were there?
Tommy: Three. They got me outside the bar.
Lou: Did they do any damage?
Tommy: Come on. They work on Wall Street the worst they can give me is a paper cut.
Tommy: Three. They got me outside the bar.
Lou: Did they do any damage?
Tommy: Come on. They work on Wall Street the worst they can give me is a paper cut.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Tommy: I'll take the high road.
Lou: Huh. You?
Tommy: Okay, maybe not the high road but certainly not the lowest road.
Lou: Which is where you normally travel.
Tommy: Hey, you kiddin' me? I drew up the original maps.
Lou: Huh. You?
Tommy: Okay, maybe not the high road but certainly not the lowest road.
Lou: Which is where you normally travel.
Tommy: Hey, you kiddin' me? I drew up the original maps.
TV Show: Rescue Me
[After they bet Sean that he couldn't get to first base and he did with a transvestite, although he doesn't know that she is one]
Tommy: Well, the thing is uh, we uh... We wanna go double or nothin'.
Chief Reilly: Oh, god.
Sean: Wait, wait, wait. What's the bet?
Tommy: 80 bucks says you can't close the deal by the weekend.
Sean: What you mean sleep with her?
Tommy: Full penetration. Before the weekend.
Sean: Yeah, I don't know.
Tommy: Come on. I thought you had game, big shot.
Sean: I do. I got game. I-- I just don't wanna rush it. It's just something about this girl, she's-- she's different.
Chief Reilly: No shit.
Tommy: Well, the thing is uh, we uh... We wanna go double or nothin'.
Chief Reilly: Oh, god.
Sean: Wait, wait, wait. What's the bet?
Tommy: 80 bucks says you can't close the deal by the weekend.
Sean: What you mean sleep with her?
Tommy: Full penetration. Before the weekend.
Sean: Yeah, I don't know.
Tommy: Come on. I thought you had game, big shot.
Sean: I do. I got game. I-- I just don't wanna rush it. It's just something about this girl, she's-- she's different.
Chief Reilly: No shit.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Chief Reilly: Oh, God.
Sean: Yeah. It was somethin' that she was doin' with her mouth. I don't know what it was but it was all...wet. [Chief looks like he's gonna puke] What's wrong? Are you okay? [Chief walks towards the bathroom]
Tommy: He had a bad sandwich this afternoon.
Sean: Yeah. It was somethin' that she was doin' with her mouth. I don't know what it was but it was all...wet. [Chief looks like he's gonna puke] What's wrong? Are you okay? [Chief walks towards the bathroom]
Tommy: He had a bad sandwich this afternoon.
TV Show: Rescue Me
[Telling the Chief how he found out that the girl he was seeing is a transvestite, he found out when he was getting a blow job]'
Chief Reilly: Man, you must have freaked out.
Sean: Yeah, yeah. It was pretty weird but I didn't want to make a big scene so once he was through I told him---
Chief Reilly: Wait, hold on a second. After he was through? You mean you let him finish the knob job?
Sean: Well, the guy was givin' me a blow-job, Chief. I didn't wanna be rude.
Chief Reilly: I'm gonna pretend that I didn't hear that.
Chief Reilly: Man, you must have freaked out.
Sean: Yeah, yeah. It was pretty weird but I didn't want to make a big scene so once he was through I told him---
Chief Reilly: Wait, hold on a second. After he was through? You mean you let him finish the knob job?
Sean: Well, the guy was givin' me a blow-job, Chief. I didn't wanna be rude.
Chief Reilly: I'm gonna pretend that I didn't hear that.
TV Show: Rescue Me
'[Janet is drunk and kisses Tommy]
Tommy: And what are we doing?
Janet: We're gonna go upstairs.
Tommy: Oh, we are?
Janet: Mm hmm.
Tommy: Okay. Now, not that I don't wanna go upstairs, but okay, where are we going with this?
Janet: What, you don't want me?
Tommy: No, that's not what I said. I did not say that. What --
Janet: Tommy, we were always at our best [kisses him] when we were in bed. A million problems everywhere else, but in bed... [kisses him] Come on.
Tommy: Alright.
Tommy: And what are we doing?
Janet: We're gonna go upstairs.
Tommy: Oh, we are?
Janet: Mm hmm.
Tommy: Okay. Now, not that I don't wanna go upstairs, but okay, where are we going with this?
Janet: What, you don't want me?
Tommy: No, that's not what I said. I did not say that. What --
Janet: Tommy, we were always at our best [kisses him] when we were in bed. A million problems everywhere else, but in bed... [kisses him] Come on.
Tommy: Alright.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Tommy: What're you ladies talking about?
Franco: The firefighter calender. I'm doing it again this year.
Sean: Yeah, he gets to choose his own month.
Tommy: Great.
Mike: So what month are you going for?
Sean: I'd try for February. Work that whole Valentine's Day thing.
Franco: Nah, common mistake. Shortest month of the year.
Mike: So, what's a good month?
Franco: Well, you definitely don't wanna be December. Nobody pays attention to you until the last 30 days of the year. You wanna be in the first four or five months to maximize booty potential. I'm thinkin' April, May, in there, you know? It's spring. Winter clothes are comin' off. Chicks are thinkin' about gettin' laid.
Mike: Yeah? Interesting.
Franco: Yeah, it's a science, and I'm the mad scientist.
Franco: The firefighter calender. I'm doing it again this year.
Sean: Yeah, he gets to choose his own month.
Tommy: Great.
Mike: So what month are you going for?
Sean: I'd try for February. Work that whole Valentine's Day thing.
Franco: Nah, common mistake. Shortest month of the year.
Mike: So, what's a good month?
Franco: Well, you definitely don't wanna be December. Nobody pays attention to you until the last 30 days of the year. You wanna be in the first four or five months to maximize booty potential. I'm thinkin' April, May, in there, you know? It's spring. Winter clothes are comin' off. Chicks are thinkin' about gettin' laid.
Mike: Yeah? Interesting.
Franco: Yeah, it's a science, and I'm the mad scientist.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Lou: Two grand for a porch?
Franco: Last one we did, we got what, 600 bucks?
Chief: Who is this guy? The king of chumps?
Tommy: Nah, some shrink, you know? I figure we get Charlie Walsh's cousin to give us the lumber for what, 300 bones? And we'll divide the rest up. You in?
Lou: Yeah, for that kind of money, I might show up in a tux.
Tommy: Franco?
Franco: In.
Mike: I'll do it.
Tommy: Let me tell you something kid: First time doing a porch job, you work for free.
Lou: Let me clarify further. Not only do you not get paid, you generally do all the work while we sit around drinking beer and shooting the shit.
Tommy: And you gotta buy the beer.
Franco: Yeah, a couple of those suitcase things. MGD is good.
Mike: Guys, I just remembered... I'm busy.
Tommy: Yeah, you're busy helping us queer-bait.
Franco: Last one we did, we got what, 600 bucks?
Chief: Who is this guy? The king of chumps?
Tommy: Nah, some shrink, you know? I figure we get Charlie Walsh's cousin to give us the lumber for what, 300 bones? And we'll divide the rest up. You in?
Lou: Yeah, for that kind of money, I might show up in a tux.
Tommy: Franco?
Franco: In.
Mike: I'll do it.
Tommy: Let me tell you something kid: First time doing a porch job, you work for free.
Lou: Let me clarify further. Not only do you not get paid, you generally do all the work while we sit around drinking beer and shooting the shit.
Tommy: And you gotta buy the beer.
Franco: Yeah, a couple of those suitcase things. MGD is good.
Mike: Guys, I just remembered... I'm busy.
Tommy: Yeah, you're busy helping us queer-bait.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Janet: Tommy, nothing's changed.
Tommy: I didn't come over to you last night, you came lookin' for-- and now you're going to tell me that it shouldn't have happened?
Janet: I was drunk, I was frustrated. I'm tired of being alone.
Tommy: You're not alone, okay? I live across the street. Which you gladly took advantage of last night.
Janet: But you don't understand. I need something more-- something that I can't get from you. [Tommy makes a face] Yes, the sex was great. But the sex is always great with us, Tommy. We've never had a problem connecting on a physical level, but an emotional level--
Tommy: Oh, Jesus Christ. I knew that was what you were going to say!
Janet: Hey, I can't do this anymore, I'm tired of being this lonely.
Tommy: You know what? You're nuts, you should see a shrink because you are--
Janet: I am sorry.
Tommy: You're sorry? Bullshit. You come over my house. You lure me into bed, you bang me, you get my hopes up and now you're sorry?
Janet: I wanted to see if it still worked.
Tommy: If what worked? My dick?
Tommy: I didn't come over to you last night, you came lookin' for-- and now you're going to tell me that it shouldn't have happened?
Janet: I was drunk, I was frustrated. I'm tired of being alone.
Tommy: You're not alone, okay? I live across the street. Which you gladly took advantage of last night.
Janet: But you don't understand. I need something more-- something that I can't get from you. [Tommy makes a face] Yes, the sex was great. But the sex is always great with us, Tommy. We've never had a problem connecting on a physical level, but an emotional level--
Tommy: Oh, Jesus Christ. I knew that was what you were going to say!
Janet: Hey, I can't do this anymore, I'm tired of being this lonely.
Tommy: You know what? You're nuts, you should see a shrink because you are--
Janet: I am sorry.
Tommy: You're sorry? Bullshit. You come over my house. You lure me into bed, you bang me, you get my hopes up and now you're sorry?
Janet: I wanted to see if it still worked.
Tommy: If what worked? My dick?
TV Show: Rescue Me
Lou: Hey, I went with Dwight the other night to the city, we caught a show and afterwards I look into this bar and who do I see? Our very own little probie making out with some broad to beat the band.
Tommy: So...?
Lou: So... this chick is old enough to be his mother.
Franco: Oh god, I just caught a chill.
Tommy: How old?
Lou: I don't know, I didn't have time to cut her in half and count the rings but she's pretty old, I mean for him. I'm guessin' late 40's.
Sean: Wow, really?
Lou: Yeah. [Mike walks up] Hey, speak of the devil. Hey, kid, your ears burning?
Mike: Huh?
Tommy: Hey, are you bangin' some old broad?
Lou: And if you are, a word of caution: A broken hip takes a very long time to heal.
Mike: Hey, she's not that old. She's only 46.
Sean: Well, that's nothin' in dog years.
Franco: Yeah, which probably applies to her.
Tommy: So...?
Lou: So... this chick is old enough to be his mother.
Franco: Oh god, I just caught a chill.
Tommy: How old?
Lou: I don't know, I didn't have time to cut her in half and count the rings but she's pretty old, I mean for him. I'm guessin' late 40's.
Sean: Wow, really?
Lou: Yeah. [Mike walks up] Hey, speak of the devil. Hey, kid, your ears burning?
Mike: Huh?
Tommy: Hey, are you bangin' some old broad?
Lou: And if you are, a word of caution: A broken hip takes a very long time to heal.
Mike: Hey, she's not that old. She's only 46.
Sean: Well, that's nothin' in dog years.
Franco: Yeah, which probably applies to her.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Chief Reilly: What're you guys talking about?
Sean: Nothing.
Lou: Eight and a smidgen of what?
Mike: Well, last night I was watchin' TV and there was nothin' on really so I---
Sean: Cut to the chase.
Mike: And I got a hard-on and I was lookin' at it and I was thinkin' about jerkin' off and--
Sean: Would you cut to the chase?
Mike: Well, there was a ruler on the table and I kinda --
Sean: He measured his cock.
Chief Reilly: You measured your cock?
Lou: And it was eight inches?
Mike: Well, mine was seven and a half... almost. His was eight.
Sean: Well, eight and a titch.
Sean: Nothing.
Lou: Eight and a smidgen of what?
Mike: Well, last night I was watchin' TV and there was nothin' on really so I---
Sean: Cut to the chase.
Mike: And I got a hard-on and I was lookin' at it and I was thinkin' about jerkin' off and--
Sean: Would you cut to the chase?
Mike: Well, there was a ruler on the table and I kinda --
Sean: He measured his cock.
Chief Reilly: You measured your cock?
Lou: And it was eight inches?
Mike: Well, mine was seven and a half... almost. His was eight.
Sean: Well, eight and a titch.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Franco: I was readin' FHM yesterday and they said that the average cock is like six inches long.
Mike: Yeah we're huge! [slaps Sean's hand]
Sean: Huge.
Chief: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Before you two ponies start swingin' your johnson's around, answer one question for me. Did you measure from the top or bottom?
Tommy: Ooh. A little fly in the ointment.
Chief: Did you go from the under carriage, from the ball-sac to the tip?
[Mike and Sean exchange looks]
Sean: Yeah. Yeah, we did.
Chief Reilly: Well then you might as well have been measuring from the base of your spine because everybody gets at least an inch going the other way. You gotta go from the pubic bone to the tip.
Mike: Ah, no way, that means I'm only like 6 1/2.
Chief Reilly: Almost.
Mike: Shit.
Sean: I don't know if you're right about that, Chief.
Chief Reilly: Been there, done this, boys. I got twenty that starts the "biggest dick in the crew" contest. Who wants in?
Mike: You gonna measure yours?
Chief Reilly: I haven't seen my feet in ten years let alone my dick.
Tommy: Chief, I got a question.
Chief Reilly: And I think I know what that question is Firefighter Gavin.
Tommy: Really?
Chief: Girth?
Tommy: Ha. Exactly.
Sean: Wait. What? Girth.
Tommy: Circumference, asshole.
Lou: That's gonna be a completely different story. I'm gonna double the wager.
Mike: Yeah we're huge! [slaps Sean's hand]
Sean: Huge.
Chief: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Before you two ponies start swingin' your johnson's around, answer one question for me. Did you measure from the top or bottom?
Tommy: Ooh. A little fly in the ointment.
Chief: Did you go from the under carriage, from the ball-sac to the tip?
[Mike and Sean exchange looks]
Sean: Yeah. Yeah, we did.
Chief Reilly: Well then you might as well have been measuring from the base of your spine because everybody gets at least an inch going the other way. You gotta go from the pubic bone to the tip.
Mike: Ah, no way, that means I'm only like 6 1/2.
Chief Reilly: Almost.
Mike: Shit.
Sean: I don't know if you're right about that, Chief.
Chief Reilly: Been there, done this, boys. I got twenty that starts the "biggest dick in the crew" contest. Who wants in?
Mike: You gonna measure yours?
Chief Reilly: I haven't seen my feet in ten years let alone my dick.
Tommy: Chief, I got a question.
Chief Reilly: And I think I know what that question is Firefighter Gavin.
Tommy: Really?
Chief: Girth?
Tommy: Ha. Exactly.
Sean: Wait. What? Girth.
Tommy: Circumference, asshole.
Lou: That's gonna be a completely different story. I'm gonna double the wager.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Sean: Well, you know uh, Chief. I really don't think this whole measuring from the top thing is really right, I mean who invented that? I mean you lose and inch, it's not really fair.
Chief Reilly: From the pubic bone to the tip. 'Cause that's all that enters the vagina. From the pubic bone, out to the tip. Done. [Sean makes a weird face] What?
Sean: Nothing. I-- just that I would never hear you say the word "vagina."
Chief Reilly: Vagina.
Sean: Stop.
Chief Reilly: Va-gina.
Sean: Come on, Chief. Stop.
Chief Reilly: From the pubic bone to the tip. 'Cause that's all that enters the vagina. From the pubic bone, out to the tip. Done. [Sean makes a weird face] What?
Sean: Nothing. I-- just that I would never hear you say the word "vagina."
Chief Reilly: Vagina.
Sean: Stop.
Chief Reilly: Va-gina.
Sean: Come on, Chief. Stop.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Uncle Teddy: [to the monkey] You filthy little son of a bitch. You keep screamin' and I'll stick a banana right up your ass.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Chief Reilly: Look, guys I wanted to get you together because we have a situation that's arisin...arosen. It's pretty important.
Sean: It's arisen.
Chief Reilly: Shut up. [to Lou] Is he right?
Lou: Amazingly, yes. How?
Sean: I've been bangin' this chick who plays alotta Scrabble. Hey, did you know that Q-A-T is a word?
Chief Reilly: Shut up.
Sean: I swear.
Chief Reilly: I said shut up.
Sean: Alright.
Sean: It's arisen.
Chief Reilly: Shut up. [to Lou] Is he right?
Lou: Amazingly, yes. How?
Sean: I've been bangin' this chick who plays alotta Scrabble. Hey, did you know that Q-A-T is a word?
Chief Reilly: Shut up.
Sean: I swear.
Chief Reilly: I said shut up.
Sean: Alright.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Tommy: [about Colleen] I'm not exactly over here doin' a jig because she turned into a lezbo.
Janet: Hey, Tom. She is not a lesbian.
Tommy: She has a girlfriend.
Janet: She's 15 years old. She's only had one boyfriend. When she's had to deal with 5 or 6 guys, then I can see her going gay.
Janet: Hey, Tom. She is not a lesbian.
Tommy: She has a girlfriend.
Janet: She's 15 years old. She's only had one boyfriend. When she's had to deal with 5 or 6 guys, then I can see her going gay.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Laura: I know you guys are talkin' about my tits and my ass. Just in case you are wondering, I'm a 34-C cup, my nipples are slightly larger than average and stand up like top-hats when aroused. My ass is tight as a snare drum but still soft to the touch. Any more questions?
Tommy: Wow. [Laura puts Tommy's sandwich on the table]
Sean: Yeah. Can I get one of those? [points to the sandwich]
Laura: No. [leaves]
Tommy: Did she just say top-hats?
Franco: I believe she did.
Lou: I've always been a big fan of formal wear.
Tommy: Wow. [Laura puts Tommy's sandwich on the table]
Sean: Yeah. Can I get one of those? [points to the sandwich]
Laura: No. [leaves]
Tommy: Did she just say top-hats?
Franco: I believe she did.
Lou: I've always been a big fan of formal wear.
TV Show: Rescue Me
[Tommy is pulled over for speeding through a downtown intersection]
Tommy: Hey, how you doing? Hey, Collins man!
Collins: You better have a good excuse, Gavin.
Tommy: Oh, you know what man, I got a phone call...
Collins: That was some dare-devil shit back there.
Tommy: I know, I know. I got a phone call about twenty minutes ago. My mom had a heart attack and I got to get to a hospital.
Collins: Bullshit.
Tommy: No bro, I'm serious!
Collins: Give me your license and reg... All right, the honeymoon's over Gavin, all right? So tell all your friends and all that hero worship you got after 9/11 ain't getting paid any dues anymore. We lost guys downtown too, but nobody even talks about us. 343 firemen. There was almost 100 cops!
Tommy: That's true. Nobody's forgetting about the cops.
Collins: Guess what? You so much as look at a cop the wrong way and you're paying the price. All right, asshole?
Tommy: You know this is going to come back to bite you in the ass. We got a big hockey game coming up again. A rematch-- in what, like a week?
Collins: Yeah, I'm real concerned about payback. Yeah, I hope your ma don't die while I'm writing you up, either. Have a nice day.
Tommy: [whispers] Shithead.
Tommy: Hey, how you doing? Hey, Collins man!
Collins: You better have a good excuse, Gavin.
Tommy: Oh, you know what man, I got a phone call...
Collins: That was some dare-devil shit back there.
Tommy: I know, I know. I got a phone call about twenty minutes ago. My mom had a heart attack and I got to get to a hospital.
Collins: Bullshit.
Tommy: No bro, I'm serious!
Collins: Give me your license and reg... All right, the honeymoon's over Gavin, all right? So tell all your friends and all that hero worship you got after 9/11 ain't getting paid any dues anymore. We lost guys downtown too, but nobody even talks about us. 343 firemen. There was almost 100 cops!
Tommy: That's true. Nobody's forgetting about the cops.
Collins: Guess what? You so much as look at a cop the wrong way and you're paying the price. All right, asshole?
Tommy: You know this is going to come back to bite you in the ass. We got a big hockey game coming up again. A rematch-- in what, like a week?
Collins: Yeah, I'm real concerned about payback. Yeah, I hope your ma don't die while I'm writing you up, either. Have a nice day.
Tommy: [whispers] Shithead.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Uncle Teddy: Where's Elvis?
Tommy: What?
Uncle Teddy: Isn't this heaven?
Tommy: No, it's my garage.
Uncle Teddy: Goddamn it! I'm alive. Shit!
Tommy: What?
Uncle Teddy: Isn't this heaven?
Tommy: No, it's my garage.
Uncle Teddy: Goddamn it! I'm alive. Shit!
TV Show: Rescue Me
[Tommy throws money into the air]
Tommy: I think you asked for what? Four grand? There's about six or seven here.
Janet: Where did you get it, Tom?
Tommy: The harder I work, the luckier I goddamned get.
Tommy: I think you asked for what? Four grand? There's about six or seven here.
Janet: Where did you get it, Tom?
Tommy: The harder I work, the luckier I goddamned get.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Tommy: [to Laura] Let me tell you something, sister, you serve two purposes in this house-- you can give me a blow job or make me a sandwich. I'm not in the mood for head and I had a late breakfast, so you're shit out of luck.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Franco: I'm tellin' ya brother. Havin' your picture in this calendar is like having a license to mint pussy.
Lou: "Mint pussy." May be one of the worst Ben & Jerry flavors of all time.
Lou: "Mint pussy." May be one of the worst Ben & Jerry flavors of all time.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Tommy: [About Sean's picture in the Fireman's calendar] You look like the Marlboro Man.
Sean: Really?
Tommy: Yeah. If the Marlboro Man smoked cock instead of cigarettes.
Sean: Really?
Tommy: Yeah. If the Marlboro Man smoked cock instead of cigarettes.
TV Show: Rescue Me
Tommy: Did you go outside like that?
Uncle Teddy: Like what?
Tommy: Like that. With your joint hangin' out.
Uncle Teddy: Hey, you got issues with the human body, that's your problem. That's your shame-based religious upbringing rearing its ugly head.
Tommy: Speakin' of ugly heads.
Uncle Teddy: Don't lay your issues on me. I got no problem being naked.
Tommy: Oh, yeah? Why don't you go upstairs and look in the mirror? I think there's more than one problem goin' on down there.
Uncle Teddy: Like what?
Tommy: Like that. With your joint hangin' out.
Uncle Teddy: Hey, you got issues with the human body, that's your problem. That's your shame-based religious upbringing rearing its ugly head.
Tommy: Speakin' of ugly heads.
Uncle Teddy: Don't lay your issues on me. I got no problem being naked.
Tommy: Oh, yeah? Why don't you go upstairs and look in the mirror? I think there's more than one problem goin' on down there.
TV Show: Rescue Me
[After they found out they were cheating on each other]
Lou: Are you gonna stop seein' him?
Phyllis: Are you gonna stop seein' her?
Lou: Who is this guy?
Phyllis: Who's the girl?
Lou: Do I know 'em?
Phyllis: Do I know her?
Lou: You know what? Maybe, maybe we shouldn't be asking questions right now.
Phyllis: Maybe not.
Lou: You know what? Lemme just say this, okay? If you told me, what you told me and I didn't have somethin' goin' on the side, I would have been so goddamn pissed you wouldn't even believe.
Phyllis: Well, you know, I'd be pissed too.
Lou: Are you gonna stop seein' him?
Phyllis: Are you gonna stop seein' her?
Lou: Who is this guy?
Phyllis: Who's the girl?
Lou: Do I know 'em?
Phyllis: Do I know her?
Lou: You know what? Maybe, maybe we shouldn't be asking questions right now.
Phyllis: Maybe not.
Lou: You know what? Lemme just say this, okay? If you told me, what you told me and I didn't have somethin' goin' on the side, I would have been so goddamn pissed you wouldn't even believe.
Phyllis: Well, you know, I'd be pissed too.
TV Show: Rescue Me