Robin Hood - Men in Tights Quotes
Rabbi Tuckman: I am Rabbi Tuckman, purveyor of sacramental wine and moyel extraordinaire.
Merry Men: 'ello Rabbi!
Rabbi Tuckman: Hello boys!
Robin Hood: A moyel... I don't believe I've ever heard of that profession.
Rabbi Tuckman: A moyel is a very important guy. He makes circumcisions.
Scarlet: What, pray tell, sir, is a circumcision?
Rabbi Tuckman: It's the latest craze. The ladies love it!
Little John: I'll take one!
Ahchoo: Hey, put me down for two!
Robin Hood: I'm game. How's it done?
Rabbi Tuckman: It's a snap. [demonstrates with a carrot and a miniature guillotine]
Rabbi Tuckman: I take my machine here, I take your little thing, I put it through this hole, and then... [releases the blade, cutting the end off the carrot]
Rabbi Tuckman: I nip the tip! Whose first?
Merry Men: [groan]
Little John: I changed me mind!
Ahchoo: I forgot, I already got one.
Blinkin: [puts his hand in the air] Question... [Ahchoo pulls his arm down silencing him]
Rabbi Tuckman: I gotta start working with a younger crowd.
Merry Men: 'ello Rabbi!
Rabbi Tuckman: Hello boys!
Robin Hood: A moyel... I don't believe I've ever heard of that profession.
Rabbi Tuckman: A moyel is a very important guy. He makes circumcisions.
Scarlet: What, pray tell, sir, is a circumcision?
Rabbi Tuckman: It's the latest craze. The ladies love it!
Little John: I'll take one!
Ahchoo: Hey, put me down for two!
Robin Hood: I'm game. How's it done?
Rabbi Tuckman: It's a snap. [demonstrates with a carrot and a miniature guillotine]
Rabbi Tuckman: I take my machine here, I take your little thing, I put it through this hole, and then... [releases the blade, cutting the end off the carrot]
Rabbi Tuckman: I nip the tip! Whose first?
Merry Men: [groan]
Little John: I changed me mind!
Ahchoo: I forgot, I already got one.
Blinkin: [puts his hand in the air] Question... [Ahchoo pulls his arm down silencing him]
Rabbi Tuckman: I gotta start working with a younger crowd.
Movie: Robin Hood - Men in Tights
Robin Hood: Blinkin, I'd like you to meet Achoo.
Blinkin: A Jew? Here?
Robin Hood: No no, not a Jew. Achoo.
Blinkin: A Jew? Here?
Robin Hood: No no, not a Jew. Achoo.
Movie: Robin Hood - Men in Tights
Robin Hood: Oh, my darling, I'm ready for that kiss now.
Maid Marian: But first, I must warn you. It could only be a kiss. For I am a virgin and could never... go all the way.
Robin Hood: But...
Maid Marian: Unless I were married. Or if a man pledged his endless love to me.
Robin Hood: Yes...
Maid Marian: Or if I knew that he desperately cared for me. Or if he were really cute!
Maid Marian: But first, I must warn you. It could only be a kiss. For I am a virgin and could never... go all the way.
Robin Hood: But...
Maid Marian: Unless I were married. Or if a man pledged his endless love to me.
Robin Hood: Yes...
Maid Marian: Or if I knew that he desperately cared for me. Or if he were really cute!
Movie: Robin Hood - Men in Tights
Robin Hood: You are entering the territory of Robin Hood and his Merry Men.
Rabbi Tuckman: Faygeles?
Merry Men: [clears their throats, trying to act macho]
Robin Hood: No, no. We're straight. Just... merry.
Rabbi Tuckman: As I. And who are you, with the exceptionally long feather in your hat?
Robin Hood: I am Robin of Locksley.
Rabbi Tuckman: Robin of Locksley? I've just come from Maid Marian, the woman whose heart you've stolen, you prince of tease, you! I knew her parents before they were taken in the plague, Lord and Lady Bahgel. You know, you two were made for each other. I mean, what a combination. Locksley and Bahgel! It can't miss!
Rabbi Tuckman: Faygeles?
Merry Men: [clears their throats, trying to act macho]
Robin Hood: No, no. We're straight. Just... merry.
Rabbi Tuckman: As I. And who are you, with the exceptionally long feather in your hat?
Robin Hood: I am Robin of Locksley.
Rabbi Tuckman: Robin of Locksley? I've just come from Maid Marian, the woman whose heart you've stolen, you prince of tease, you! I knew her parents before they were taken in the plague, Lord and Lady Bahgel. You know, you two were made for each other. I mean, what a combination. Locksley and Bahgel! It can't miss!
Movie: Robin Hood - Men in Tights
Sheriff of Rottingham: Sire, I have news!
Prince John: And what sort of news do you have? It's not bad news, is it? You know I can't take bad news. The day started out so good. I had a good night's sleep, I had a good B.M. I don't want to hear any bad news. So, what kind of news is it?
Sheriff of Rottingham: Well, to be perfectly frank, it's bad.
Prince John: [shouts] I knew it! I knew it would be bad news. Wait, I have an idea. Maybe if you tell me the *bad* news in a *good* way, it wouldn't sound so bad.
Sheriff of Rottingham: [thinking] The bad news in a good way. Yes, I can do that. The bad news in a good way. Well, here it goes. [hysterically]
Sheriff of Rottingham: W-wait till you hear this! I just saw Robin of Locksley, he's back from the crusades. [laughs]
Sheriff of Rottingham: You know, he just beat the *crap* out of me and my men. [laughs]
Sheriff of Rottingham: He hates you and he loves your brother, Richard! [laughs]
Sheriff of Rottingham: And... [laughs]
Sheriff of Rottingham: ... he wants to see you hanged! [laughs]
Sheriff of Rottingham: We, we're in a lot of trouble! [laughs and snorts loudly]
Prince John: [furious] What, are you crazy? Why are you laughing? This is terrible news!
Prince John: And what sort of news do you have? It's not bad news, is it? You know I can't take bad news. The day started out so good. I had a good night's sleep, I had a good B.M. I don't want to hear any bad news. So, what kind of news is it?
Sheriff of Rottingham: Well, to be perfectly frank, it's bad.
Prince John: [shouts] I knew it! I knew it would be bad news. Wait, I have an idea. Maybe if you tell me the *bad* news in a *good* way, it wouldn't sound so bad.
Sheriff of Rottingham: [thinking] The bad news in a good way. Yes, I can do that. The bad news in a good way. Well, here it goes. [hysterically]
Sheriff of Rottingham: W-wait till you hear this! I just saw Robin of Locksley, he's back from the crusades. [laughs]
Sheriff of Rottingham: You know, he just beat the *crap* out of me and my men. [laughs]
Sheriff of Rottingham: He hates you and he loves your brother, Richard! [laughs]
Sheriff of Rottingham: And... [laughs]
Sheriff of Rottingham: ... he wants to see you hanged! [laughs]
Sheriff of Rottingham: We, we're in a lot of trouble! [laughs and snorts loudly]
Prince John: [furious] What, are you crazy? Why are you laughing? This is terrible news!
Movie: Robin Hood - Men in Tights