Scrubs Quote
Dr. Kelso: What are you thinking, Ted?
Ted: [voiceover] I could jam this [knife] through the soft spot on his temple, then slit my wrists with it before anyone got in to stop me... [to Kelso] The usual, sir.
Dr. Kelso: Well, you'd never do it; you don't have the guts.
[Carla and the nurses walk in]
Carla: If it's okay with you, we'll take that raise now.
Dr. Kelso: Okay, but in this little fantasy of yours, can I not have prostate problems any more? I can't sleep more than 40 minutes without needing to take a whiz...
Carla: Unfortunately for you, someone left this invoice for the hospital needles on my desk. And they're really undercharging you! So, either you shell out the extra 20 grand a month for our raises, or we call the needle company and it'll cost you twice that.
Dr. Kelso: [angrily] Ted, are you responsible for this?
Ted: [expressionless] Please, sir. I don't have the guts. [voiceover, deliriously happy] Oh yeah! Suck it bitch! I will murder you!
Ted: [voiceover] I could jam this [knife] through the soft spot on his temple, then slit my wrists with it before anyone got in to stop me... [to Kelso] The usual, sir.
Dr. Kelso: Well, you'd never do it; you don't have the guts.
[Carla and the nurses walk in]
Carla: If it's okay with you, we'll take that raise now.
Dr. Kelso: Okay, but in this little fantasy of yours, can I not have prostate problems any more? I can't sleep more than 40 minutes without needing to take a whiz...
Carla: Unfortunately for you, someone left this invoice for the hospital needles on my desk. And they're really undercharging you! So, either you shell out the extra 20 grand a month for our raises, or we call the needle company and it'll cost you twice that.
Dr. Kelso: [angrily] Ted, are you responsible for this?
Ted: [expressionless] Please, sir. I don't have the guts. [voiceover, deliriously happy] Oh yeah! Suck it bitch! I will murder you!
TV Show: Scrubs
