Sonny With a Chance Quotes
Dakota: Hi Chad! How about joining me for lunch?
Chad: Oh hi Dakota. Yeah I'd love to. Actually I'm due on set for rehearsal.
Dakota: Not if my daddy cancels your show.
Chad: (high voice) Oh what are we having?
Chad: Oh hi Dakota. Yeah I'd love to. Actually I'm due on set for rehearsal.
Dakota: Not if my daddy cancels your show.
Chad: (high voice) Oh what are we having?
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Zora: Hi Chad. How would the greatest actor of this generation like to buy a box of cookies?
Chad: (takes out money) You had me at greatest actor of this generation.
Chad: (takes out money) You had me at greatest actor of this generation.
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Sonny: Well whoever buys from us, will get a free balloon with each purchase!
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Chad: (pops Sonny's balloon) if you buy it from us I'll give you my autograph!
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Sonny: Well anybody who buys it from us will get my autograph! (flips hair)
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Chad: I've got a box.
Dakota: YES! we can sell it, and we'll win!
Sonny: (flirtatiously) Chad....hand us the cookies. We're your friends.
Dakota: YES! we can sell it, and we'll win!
Sonny: (flirtatiously) Chad....hand us the cookies. We're your friends.
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Chad: I'm just here to talk about my book.
Gilroy: Actually you're not; I wanted you both here so I could get your reaction to this. Let's roll the clip!
Gilroy: Actually you're not; I wanted you both here so I could get your reaction to this. Let's roll the clip!
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
[After clip]
Tawni: Whoa.
Sonny: Where did you get that?
Gilroy: Didn't know you were being filmed, huh? Apparently someone in Mackenzie Falls doesn't like Sonny very much. So as we say on the show...GOTCHA!
Sonny: What? You 'gotched' nothing, alright? That was totally taken out of context.
Gilroy: That's what I do! If I were to wait for things to be in context I would not have a show. Still, seems the two of you have little something, something going on... care to comment?
Sonny: Yup! Right after this commercial break!
Gilroy: We're not taking a break.
Sonny: Well, we are! Let's go. (drags Chad off stage)
Tawni: You're leaving me here by myself?
Sonny: Yes.
Tawni: YES!
Tawni: Whoa.
Sonny: Where did you get that?
Gilroy: Didn't know you were being filmed, huh? Apparently someone in Mackenzie Falls doesn't like Sonny very much. So as we say on the show...GOTCHA!
Sonny: What? You 'gotched' nothing, alright? That was totally taken out of context.
Gilroy: That's what I do! If I were to wait for things to be in context I would not have a show. Still, seems the two of you have little something, something going on... care to comment?
Sonny: Yup! Right after this commercial break!
Gilroy: We're not taking a break.
Sonny: Well, we are! Let's go. (drags Chad off stage)
Tawni: You're leaving me here by myself?
Sonny: Yes.
Tawni: YES!
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Sonny: I can't believe Gilroy tried to do that to us!
Chad: That guy's a jerk. I can't believe I read that book for nothing.
Sonny: You know, Tawni and I made a pact earlier that we wouldn't tell anyone secrets, and I think that we should probably do the same thing.
Chad: Okay fine, I didn't read the book! [Sonny looks at him] Wha-oh, you were talking about the us, (Sonny nods) yeah, we don't have secrets!....Do we?
Sonny: Uh-I don't know, do we?
Chad: That guy's a jerk. I can't believe I read that book for nothing.
Sonny: You know, Tawni and I made a pact earlier that we wouldn't tell anyone secrets, and I think that we should probably do the same thing.
Chad: Okay fine, I didn't read the book! [Sonny looks at him] Wha-oh, you were talking about the us, (Sonny nods) yeah, we don't have secrets!....Do we?
Sonny: Uh-I don't know, do we?
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Sonny: I mean, what is that, like us liking each other?
Chad: Yeah, I mean I don't really want to talk about my feelings in front of the live studio audience.
Sonny: Yeah, yeah yeah right, I mean especially feelings we've never talked about before.
Chad: Yeah..you have feelings?
Sonny: Do you have feelings?
Chad: I-I mean since you're really asking...it's just the two of us....
Sonny: Right! I mean there's no cameras this time or anything.
Chad: Yeah, I really...I just....
Sonny: No, listen. It's what I'm here for. [Chad smiles at her) You go first!
Chad: No you go first.
Sonny: No you g- ok same time.
Chad: Yeah.
Sonny: One... two...
Chad: I was gonna say that yeah, um, two and a half?
Chad: Yeah, I mean I don't really want to talk about my feelings in front of the live studio audience.
Sonny: Yeah, yeah yeah right, I mean especially feelings we've never talked about before.
Chad: Yeah..you have feelings?
Sonny: Do you have feelings?
Chad: I-I mean since you're really asking...it's just the two of us....
Sonny: Right! I mean there's no cameras this time or anything.
Chad: Yeah, I really...I just....
Sonny: No, listen. It's what I'm here for. [Chad smiles at her) You go first!
Chad: No you go first.
Sonny: No you g- ok same time.
Chad: Yeah.
Sonny: One... two...
Chad: I was gonna say that yeah, um, two and a half?
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Tawni: [After she steals Gilroy's remote and Gilroy tries to take it back]No no no! It's time for Tawni Talk! Have a seat!
[Gilroy sits down.]:
Gilroy: The camera's over there.
Tawni: Oh. Hey America!
[Gilroy takes back remote and turns on monitor.]:
Tawni: Hey!
Sonny: That was so much easier to say than I thought it would be.
Gilroy: [Screams] What was easy? What did they say? I almost had them!
Tawni: Gotcha!
[Gilroy sits down.]:
Gilroy: The camera's over there.
Tawni: Oh. Hey America!
[Gilroy takes back remote and turns on monitor.]:
Tawni: Hey!
Sonny: That was so much easier to say than I thought it would be.
Gilroy: [Screams] What was easy? What did they say? I almost had them!
Tawni: Gotcha!
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Sonny: (runs up to Tawni, Nico and Grady) You guys! You guys! Stop eating!
Nico: Alright! Turn around! Let me see your butt!
Sonny: (confused) What?
Nico: Alright! Turn around! Let me see your butt!
Sonny: (confused) What?
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Sonny: Hey Chad. Did you hear about my Walk-a-Thon for books?
Chad: Oh yes, we did. And I have to say Sonny, you are very inspiring.
Sonny: Well, we have so much. It's important that we give back.
Chad: (laughs) Aah no, I meant you inspired me to have a Walk-a-Thon against your Walk-a-Thon.
Sonny: (Pauses to look at the flyer Chad handed to her) A Walk-a-thon against books? How could you be against books?
Chad: That's easy. The more you read, the less you watch MacKenzie Falls.
Sonny: That's your cause, To get people to watch more TV?
Chad: Are you not listening? It's to get them to read less. I'll see you at the Walk-a-Thon to read less books. (turns and turns back around) I've got something to tell you Sonny. We're gonna raise more money than you.
Sonny: For what?
Chad: To not buy books.
Sonny: That doesn't even make sense!
Chad: Aah. Guess all that reading you're doing isn't making you any smarter now, is it? See ya.
Chad: Oh yes, we did. And I have to say Sonny, you are very inspiring.
Sonny: Well, we have so much. It's important that we give back.
Chad: (laughs) Aah no, I meant you inspired me to have a Walk-a-Thon against your Walk-a-Thon.
Sonny: (Pauses to look at the flyer Chad handed to her) A Walk-a-thon against books? How could you be against books?
Chad: That's easy. The more you read, the less you watch MacKenzie Falls.
Sonny: That's your cause, To get people to watch more TV?
Chad: Are you not listening? It's to get them to read less. I'll see you at the Walk-a-Thon to read less books. (turns and turns back around) I've got something to tell you Sonny. We're gonna raise more money than you.
Sonny: For what?
Chad: To not buy books.
Sonny: That doesn't even make sense!
Chad: Aah. Guess all that reading you're doing isn't making you any smarter now, is it? See ya.
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Chad: We're gonna look hotter than you at the Walk-a-Thon.
Sonny: (laughs) Giving back is what's hot!
Chad: That's what people who don't look hot say.
Sonny: (laughs) Giving back is what's hot!
Chad: That's what people who don't look hot say.
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Nico: These pants are so skinny!
Nico: Tawni's pants are squishing my gluttons maxmi moola!
Grady: (stands up)I signed up for a Walk-a-Thon. Not to have my internal organs crushed by Tawni's jeans!
Sonny: (walks out of the photo booth and trying to button her jeans) I want my mommy jeans back!
Grady: This is impossible.
Sonny: We have to make this work! The only way we can get Tawni to walk with us is for us to wear her jeans because her fans will see on t.v. us wearing her jeans which will raise money for more books and less money for no books and everybody wins except Chad!!!!!! Hey now that I got that out I can button my pants.
Grady: Well good for you because I'm never getting these things on.
Nico: Me neither.
Tawni: (walks in) Yes you will. Thanks to the Tawni Hart Butt Horn.
Nico: Tawni's pants are squishing my gluttons maxmi moola!
Grady: (stands up)I signed up for a Walk-a-Thon. Not to have my internal organs crushed by Tawni's jeans!
Sonny: (walks out of the photo booth and trying to button her jeans) I want my mommy jeans back!
Grady: This is impossible.
Sonny: We have to make this work! The only way we can get Tawni to walk with us is for us to wear her jeans because her fans will see on t.v. us wearing her jeans which will raise money for more books and less money for no books and everybody wins except Chad!!!!!! Hey now that I got that out I can button my pants.
Grady: Well good for you because I'm never getting these things on.
Nico: Me neither.
Tawni: (walks in) Yes you will. Thanks to the Tawni Hart Butt Horn.
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
News Reporter: Chad, can I get a comment?
Chad: Well-(screams) We win, suck-ahh!(falls down)
Chad: Well-(screams) We win, suck-ahh!(falls down)
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
News Reporter: Oh no! MacKenzie Falls is down too! What is happening?!
Sonny: SPS is happening.
Sonny: SPS is happening.
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Chad: Sonny! Sonny, come here! I need to tell you something, in case I don't make it.
Sonny: Okay.
Chad: I love...
Sonny: Yes?
Chad: I mean I deeply love..
Sonny: Go on!
Chad: ...that more kids are reading less books because of Chad Dylan Cooper!
Sonny: (lets go of Chad's hand and touches his forehead) Oh no! I think you're coming down with P.F.S. too!
Chad: What's that!?
Sonny: (picks up pillow) Pillow in the Face Syndrome! (hits Chad with pillow)
Doctor: Ms. Monroe!
Sonny: Yeah, just fluffing Doc! (throws pillow at Chad and walks over to the doctor)
Sonny: Okay.
Chad: I love...
Sonny: Yes?
Chad: I mean I deeply love..
Sonny: Go on!
Chad: ...that more kids are reading less books because of Chad Dylan Cooper!
Sonny: (lets go of Chad's hand and touches his forehead) Oh no! I think you're coming down with P.F.S. too!
Chad: What's that!?
Sonny: (picks up pillow) Pillow in the Face Syndrome! (hits Chad with pillow)
Doctor: Ms. Monroe!
Sonny: Yeah, just fluffing Doc! (throws pillow at Chad and walks over to the doctor)
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Chad: Give it to me straight, doc! I can take it.
Doctor: You have L.B.S.
Chad: (gasps) Leading Boy Syndrome?!
Doctor: No. Lack of Book Syndrome! Also known as Lazy Butt Syndrome! LBS is also the abbreviation of pounds, (starts poking Chad), which is what you are going to gain if you don't stop watching yourself on T.V.
Chad: Can't you just cut my pants off? You know how you do?
Doctor: Read two books, then call me in the morning, Mr. Cooper. (hands Chad a perscription)
Chad: (Looks at perscription) Actually it's Dylan Cooper.
Doctor: Not anymore, I removed your Dylan while you were under.
Chad: NO! What did you do to it?!
Doctor: I gave it to someone who wouldn't waste it! (Opens curtains to reveal Grady)
Doctor: Good afternoon, Mr. Grady Dylan Mitchell.
Grady: Just got my Dylan. I've been waiting for 2 years!
Chad: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! (cries) WHY?!
(Chad wakes up)
Chad: I must have fallen asleep reading. Stupid books. That was horrible! (closes book)
Doctor: You have L.B.S.
Chad: (gasps) Leading Boy Syndrome?!
Doctor: No. Lack of Book Syndrome! Also known as Lazy Butt Syndrome! LBS is also the abbreviation of pounds, (starts poking Chad), which is what you are going to gain if you don't stop watching yourself on T.V.
Chad: Can't you just cut my pants off? You know how you do?
Doctor: Read two books, then call me in the morning, Mr. Cooper. (hands Chad a perscription)
Chad: (Looks at perscription) Actually it's Dylan Cooper.
Doctor: Not anymore, I removed your Dylan while you were under.
Chad: NO! What did you do to it?!
Doctor: I gave it to someone who wouldn't waste it! (Opens curtains to reveal Grady)
Doctor: Good afternoon, Mr. Grady Dylan Mitchell.
Grady: Just got my Dylan. I've been waiting for 2 years!
Chad: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! (cries) WHY?!
(Chad wakes up)
Chad: I must have fallen asleep reading. Stupid books. That was horrible! (closes book)
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Tawni: I don't know why you're packing, you're not going anywhere until you apologize!
Sonny: I don't know why you're packing because I'm not apologizing!
Tawni: Of course you're apologizing it's your thing, you apologize. It's the circle of life (Pretends to draw a circle in the air) cir-cle!
Sonny: And here's what I think about your (Makes hand motion) cir-cle (Pretends to grab circle)
Tawni: (Gasp) What are you doing to my circle?!
Sonny: I'm ripping it! (Pretends to rip circle)
Tawni: Give me that! (They start fighting for the circle)
Sonny: Got it! (Tawni cries)
Sonny: I don't know why you're packing because I'm not apologizing!
Tawni: Of course you're apologizing it's your thing, you apologize. It's the circle of life (Pretends to draw a circle in the air) cir-cle!
Sonny: And here's what I think about your (Makes hand motion) cir-cle (Pretends to grab circle)
Tawni: (Gasp) What are you doing to my circle?!
Sonny: I'm ripping it! (Pretends to rip circle)
Tawni: Give me that! (They start fighting for the circle)
Sonny: Got it! (Tawni cries)
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Tawni: Check out its chicken neck.
Sonny: Check out its chicken arms.
Tawni and Sonny: They're called wings.
Sonny: It felt so good to check it out with you.
Tawni: Really? 'Cause I thought that you thought Dinka was better than me.
Sonny: And I thought that you thought you're partner was better than me.
Tawni: My partner was a goat.
Sonny: My partner sang like one.
Tawni and Sonny: I'm sorry. (hugs each other)
Tawni: Oooh. I'm seeing a lot of angry people over your shoulder.
Sonny: And I'm watching a goat go to the bathroom over yours.
Sonny: Check out its chicken arms.
Tawni and Sonny: They're called wings.
Sonny: It felt so good to check it out with you.
Tawni: Really? 'Cause I thought that you thought Dinka was better than me.
Sonny: And I thought that you thought you're partner was better than me.
Tawni: My partner was a goat.
Sonny: My partner sang like one.
Tawni and Sonny: I'm sorry. (hugs each other)
Tawni: Oooh. I'm seeing a lot of angry people over your shoulder.
Sonny: And I'm watching a goat go to the bathroom over yours.
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Bella: Gassie! Stay! And don't lick yourself. I just brushed you.
Sonny: (knocks on Gassie's door) Gassie.
Gassie: (walks out through the doggy door)
Sonny: (to Gassie and pets him) Awww. There you are. You know, I used to have a dog just like you in Wisconsin. Yeah, except he was a beagle with three legs and one eye. We called him Lucky! Or... or Limpy. Or Blindy. But, you know, it didn't matter what we called him because he was deaf too! You know what else he loved? We think. Meatballs. Yeah, you smell? (feeds Gassie the meatballs) Awwww. I bet she never feeds you treats huh?
Bella: Gassie!
Sonny: (throws some more meatballs through Gassie's door) Gassie go! Go! Hurry!
Sonny: (knocks on Gassie's door) Gassie.
Gassie: (walks out through the doggy door)
Sonny: (to Gassie and pets him) Awww. There you are. You know, I used to have a dog just like you in Wisconsin. Yeah, except he was a beagle with three legs and one eye. We called him Lucky! Or... or Limpy. Or Blindy. But, you know, it didn't matter what we called him because he was deaf too! You know what else he loved? We think. Meatballs. Yeah, you smell? (feeds Gassie the meatballs) Awwww. I bet she never feeds you treats huh?
Bella: Gassie!
Sonny: (throws some more meatballs through Gassie's door) Gassie go! Go! Hurry!
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Bella: What are you doing here?
Sonny: (mouth full) Nothing.
Bella: Were you playing with Gassie?
Sonny: (shakes her head) Nuh unh!
Bella: (stares at Sonny)
Sonny: (stares back at Bella)
Bella: (stares back at Sonny) I'm watching you. (leaves)
Sonny: (spits the meatballs out and puts them on the floor)
Gassie: (walks back out)
Sonny: You heard Bella, Gassie. She doesn't want me playing with you anymore. (has an idea) But she didn't say anything about you playing with me!
Gassie: (farts)
Sonny: I'll take that as a yes! Come on Gassie!
Gassie: (follows Sonny)
Sonny: (mouth full) Nothing.
Bella: Were you playing with Gassie?
Sonny: (shakes her head) Nuh unh!
Bella: (stares at Sonny)
Sonny: (stares back at Bella)
Bella: (stares back at Sonny) I'm watching you. (leaves)
Sonny: (spits the meatballs out and puts them on the floor)
Gassie: (walks back out)
Sonny: You heard Bella, Gassie. She doesn't want me playing with you anymore. (has an idea) But she didn't say anything about you playing with me!
Gassie: (farts)
Sonny: I'll take that as a yes! Come on Gassie!
Gassie: (follows Sonny)
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
Sonny: I didn't come here to argue I came here to give Gassie some dog time. Beneath the trees and on grass...
Chad: Except the grass is plastic and the trees are cardboard because[through the bull-horn]THIS IS A SET.
Sonny: Good then what Gassie is doing to that bush over there wont kill it.
Chad: Except the grass is plastic and the trees are cardboard because[through the bull-horn]THIS IS A SET.
Sonny: Good then what Gassie is doing to that bush over there wont kill it.
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance
So Random Cast: (sees Gassie dead) NO!
Zora: Please tell me he's sleeping.
Sonny: Okay, he's sleeping.
Zora: DON'T LIE TO ME!!!
Tawni: What did you do?
Sonny: I don't know! It was going so well. I told him to sit and he sat. I told him roll over he rolled over. I told him to play dead HE DIED!
Grady: (feels Gassie's paws) You guys should feel this.
Zora: Please tell me he's sleeping.
Sonny: Okay, he's sleeping.
Zora: DON'T LIE TO ME!!!
Tawni: What did you do?
Sonny: I don't know! It was going so well. I told him to sit and he sat. I told him roll over he rolled over. I told him to play dead HE DIED!
Grady: (feels Gassie's paws) You guys should feel this.
TV Show: Sonny With a Chance