SpongeBob SquarePants Quotes
Patrick: [trying to get Squidward to hold a jellyfish net] Firmly grasp it in your hand. [The net falls off of Squidward's bandaged hand] FIRMLY grasp it. [Net stays for a moment, then falls off the bandaged hand again][angrily] FIRMLY GRASP IT! [forces the jellyfishing net through the cast and onto Squidward's hand, who screams muffled] That oughta do it!
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
[Spongebob completes a Krabby Patty and it starts jumping around the kitchen by itself]
Squidward: Come on Spongebob, STOP IT!
Spongebob: I swear, I'm not doing anything!
[The Krabby Patty heads into the dining area]
Spongebob: Mr Krabs! The krabby patty is haunted!
[Mr Krabs stabs the patty with his leg]
Mr Krabs: Avas, ye patty pirate! This is no ghost. This is Plankton! Stealing me booty!
Plankton: Hear me Krabs, when I discover your formula for Krabby Patties, I'll run you out of business! I WENT TO COLLEGE![Krabs picks him up] Hey, let me go!
Mr. Krabs: Oh, I'll let you go, squirt ... on a flying saucer! [puts Plankton on a plate and throws him out the door of the Krusty Krab]
Squidward: Come on Spongebob, STOP IT!
Spongebob: I swear, I'm not doing anything!
[The Krabby Patty heads into the dining area]
Spongebob: Mr Krabs! The krabby patty is haunted!
[Mr Krabs stabs the patty with his leg]
Mr Krabs: Avas, ye patty pirate! This is no ghost. This is Plankton! Stealing me booty!
Plankton: Hear me Krabs, when I discover your formula for Krabby Patties, I'll run you out of business! I WENT TO COLLEGE![Krabs picks him up] Hey, let me go!
Mr. Krabs: Oh, I'll let you go, squirt ... on a flying saucer! [puts Plankton on a plate and throws him out the door of the Krusty Krab]
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
Plankton: Any last words, SpongeBob SecretPants?
SpongeBob: [realizing it's no use to fight] I just have to say I'm sorry I let Mr. Krabs down. I let all of Bikini Bottom down. [tears fill his eyes and leak down his face] But worst of all, I let you down, you delicate little Krabby Patty...with your tasty, juicy, scrumptious, warm, steaming goodness...
Plankton: [enticed] Steaming?
SpongeBob: [sadly] I'll never forget your one-hundred-percent all-secret patty, secretly assembled with undersea cheese, pickles, lettuce, tomato, onion, all secretly steaming between two fluffy seaweed sea buns.
Plankton: [drooling] Yes. YES! [dives out of SpongeBob's head] Come to Papa! [bounces off the top bun and falls into the analyzer] Oh, boy. [the analyzer zaps him]
Karen: Plankton: 1% Evil, 99% Hot Gas.
SpongeBob: [realizing it's no use to fight] I just have to say I'm sorry I let Mr. Krabs down. I let all of Bikini Bottom down. [tears fill his eyes and leak down his face] But worst of all, I let you down, you delicate little Krabby Patty...with your tasty, juicy, scrumptious, warm, steaming goodness...
Plankton: [enticed] Steaming?
SpongeBob: [sadly] I'll never forget your one-hundred-percent all-secret patty, secretly assembled with undersea cheese, pickles, lettuce, tomato, onion, all secretly steaming between two fluffy seaweed sea buns.
Plankton: [drooling] Yes. YES! [dives out of SpongeBob's head] Come to Papa! [bounces off the top bun and falls into the analyzer] Oh, boy. [the analyzer zaps him]
Karen: Plankton: 1% Evil, 99% Hot Gas.
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
[While SpongeBob is walking home]
SpongeBob: Plankton? What are you doing here?
Plankton: I just want to talk. You could say we're friends, right?
SpongeBob: Um...no.
Plankton: Acquaintances?
SpongeBob: No.
Plankton: [thinks] Well, we're both invertebrates, aren't we?
SpongeBob: I...guess so.
Plankton: You see? Everything works out.
SpongeBob: Plankton? What are you doing here?
Plankton: I just want to talk. You could say we're friends, right?
SpongeBob: Um...no.
Plankton: Acquaintances?
SpongeBob: No.
Plankton: [thinks] Well, we're both invertebrates, aren't we?
SpongeBob: I...guess so.
Plankton: You see? Everything works out.
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
Plankton: SpongeBob, you will be mine! [takes out a gramophone and begins playing it]
Singer: [singing on the record] Letters of the alphabet A, B, C....
Plankton: [laughs, then notices the incorrect music]
[Plankton flips the record to the correct side, which plays ominous music]
Plankton: [laughs evily]
Singer: [singing on the record] Letters of the alphabet A, B, C....
Plankton: [laughs, then notices the incorrect music]
[Plankton flips the record to the correct side, which plays ominous music]
Plankton: [laughs evily]
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
[SpongeBob and Patrick are playing a game in which they whisper messages to each other using bubbles. SpongeBob dips his bubble wand into his bottle of bubble mix, thinks a moment, then whispers a message into his bubble. The bubble floats to Patrick and pops, and SpongeBob's message is revealed]
SpongeBob: Hi, Patrick.
[Patrick giggles, then dips his own wand into his own bottle, then shoves the wand into his mouth and takes it out before dipping it into his bottle again and whispering his own message to SpongeBob. The bubble floats to SpongeBob and pops, revealing Patrick's message]
Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob.
[SpongeBob laughs, much to Squidward's annoyance]
SpongeBob: Hi, Patrick.
[Patrick giggles, then dips his own wand into his own bottle, then shoves the wand into his mouth and takes it out before dipping it into his bottle again and whispering his own message to SpongeBob. The bubble floats to SpongeBob and pops, revealing Patrick's message]
Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob.
[SpongeBob laughs, much to Squidward's annoyance]
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
SpongeBob: [into his bubble] Patrick, you're my best big assed friend in the whole neighborhood.
[Squidward whispers a message into his own bubble, and the bubble replaces SpongeBob's bubble and floats on to Patrick]
Squidward: [as SpongeBob] Patrick, you are the dumbest idiot it has ever been my misfortune to know.
[Patrick doesn't look happy at the moment he hears the message. He dips his wand into his bottle and whispers a message. It floats over to SpongeBob]
Patrick: Do you really think that, SpongeBob?
SpongeBob: [into his bubble] Of course, Patrick! Anyone with eyes could see that!
Patrick: [a bubble floats to SpongeBob and pops] Yeah, well, I think you're ugly! Yellow is ugly! [blows a raspberry, then blows a shorter raspberry]
SpongeBob: [into his bubble very confused] Patrick, what are you talking about?
Squidward: [disguised as Patrick] SpongeBob, I no longer wish to know you. You give bottom dwellers a bad name! If I had a dollar for every brain you don't have, I'd have one dollar!
Squidward: [disguised as SpongeBob] Hey Patrick! I heard there was a job opening down at the pet shop, as some newspaper!
Patrick: [shouting] Well, that makes you a big dummy, you dummy!
SpongeBob: Yeah, well that means uh...so are you!
Patrick: Then you're a turkey!
SpongeBob: What's that?!
Patrick: It's what you are!
SpongeBob: Yeah? Well, you're a bigger one!
Patrick: Well, you're still yellow! And do you know what else is yellow?!
SpongeBob: WHAT?!
Patrick: YOU ARE!
SpongeBob: YEAH?! WELL IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU CALL ME 'CAUSE I NEVER WANNA SEE YOU AGAIN ANYWAY!
[Squidward whispers a message into his own bubble, and the bubble replaces SpongeBob's bubble and floats on to Patrick]
Squidward: [as SpongeBob] Patrick, you are the dumbest idiot it has ever been my misfortune to know.
[Patrick doesn't look happy at the moment he hears the message. He dips his wand into his bottle and whispers a message. It floats over to SpongeBob]
Patrick: Do you really think that, SpongeBob?
SpongeBob: [into his bubble] Of course, Patrick! Anyone with eyes could see that!
Patrick: [a bubble floats to SpongeBob and pops] Yeah, well, I think you're ugly! Yellow is ugly! [blows a raspberry, then blows a shorter raspberry]
SpongeBob: [into his bubble very confused] Patrick, what are you talking about?
Squidward: [disguised as Patrick] SpongeBob, I no longer wish to know you. You give bottom dwellers a bad name! If I had a dollar for every brain you don't have, I'd have one dollar!
Squidward: [disguised as SpongeBob] Hey Patrick! I heard there was a job opening down at the pet shop, as some newspaper!
Patrick: [shouting] Well, that makes you a big dummy, you dummy!
SpongeBob: Yeah, well that means uh...so are you!
Patrick: Then you're a turkey!
SpongeBob: What's that?!
Patrick: It's what you are!
SpongeBob: Yeah? Well, you're a bigger one!
Patrick: Well, you're still yellow! And do you know what else is yellow?!
SpongeBob: WHAT?!
Patrick: YOU ARE!
SpongeBob: YEAH?! WELL IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU CALL ME 'CAUSE I NEVER WANNA SEE YOU AGAIN ANYWAY!
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
[Squidward has accidentally swallowed his fork, and now his windpipe is blocked]
Patrick: Wow! Squidward, you're choking! I know what to do, but I should wash my hands first... Oh well.
Patrick: Wow! Squidward, you're choking! I know what to do, but I should wash my hands first... Oh well.
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
[Squidward left SpongeBob and Patrick alone in his house, and came back from the store to find his house completely destroyed, all that is left is bluish rubble]
Squidward: What a surprise. I invited them in, and I left them alone. Well, Squidward, what have we learned today?
Squidward: What a surprise. I invited them in, and I left them alone. Well, Squidward, what have we learned today?
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
SpongeBob: [singing] Squidward is my best friend in the world. [starts playing the bassinet very badly] Squidward is my best friend in the sea. [starts playing the bassinet very badly again. He lets go of his bow and the bow flies into a picture of Squidward]
Squidward: Aaah! [growls and breaks the bow in half on his knee]
SpongeBob: [singing] Squidward... [is playing the bassinet like a guitar]
Patrick: [poking his head inside] ...likes Patrick more than SpongeBob.
[Spongebob slams the door in Patrick's face]
Patrick: OOMF!
SpongeBob: And Patrick is a dirty, stinky, rotten friend stealer! [hits the bassinet against the floor and it breaks] Um... I can fix this.
[Squidward kicks SpongeBob out of his house]
SpongeBob: So uh... I'll see you tomorrow, Squidward? Call me!
Squidward: Aaah! [growls and breaks the bow in half on his knee]
SpongeBob: [singing] Squidward... [is playing the bassinet like a guitar]
Patrick: [poking his head inside] ...likes Patrick more than SpongeBob.
[Spongebob slams the door in Patrick's face]
Patrick: OOMF!
SpongeBob: And Patrick is a dirty, stinky, rotten friend stealer! [hits the bassinet against the floor and it breaks] Um... I can fix this.
[Squidward kicks SpongeBob out of his house]
SpongeBob: So uh... I'll see you tomorrow, Squidward? Call me!
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
SpongeBob: Guess what, Squidward?
Patrick: Me and Spongebob are friends again!
Squidward: Great. Go be friends somewhere else.
SpongeBob: Don't you want us to help you clean this up a little?
Squidward: NO! OUT!
SpongeBob: Psst. I think he's jealous.
Patrick: How pathetic.
Squidward: [growls, slams his door, a nearby bubble pops into it and the door falls on Squidward] Ohh, my back!
Patrick: Me and Spongebob are friends again!
Squidward: Great. Go be friends somewhere else.
SpongeBob: Don't you want us to help you clean this up a little?
Squidward: NO! OUT!
SpongeBob: Psst. I think he's jealous.
Patrick: How pathetic.
Squidward: [growls, slams his door, a nearby bubble pops into it and the door falls on Squidward] Ohh, my back!
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
[at the beginning of SpongeBob's 38th boating test]
Mrs. Puff: First we must--
SpongeBob: First I must pass the oral exam! I am confident in my abilities to successfully succeed.
Mrs. Puff: I know. Okay. Number one, what is the front of the boat?
SpongeBob: The bow.
Mrs. Puff: What is the back?
SpongeBob: Stern!
Mrs. Puff: Number three. Right is--
SpongeBob: Starboard! [answering the remaining questions] Port, skipper, deck, cabin, gally, keel, 1924!
Mrs. Puff: You've passed the oral test. What a surprise. Now, it's time to once again take the driving portion of the exam. Okay, SpongeBob...get in the boat.
SpongeBob: Oh, wha...in this boat? Right here? [looks at watch nervously] Is it time already?
Mrs. Puff: Get in the boat, SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: Oh, yeah, absolutely. [gets into boat and closes eyes with a smile, confidently]
Mrs. Puff: All you have to do is get on the track. [SpongeBob's eyes spring open in awe as he looks down the track which becomes longer and longer in delusion] Okay, SpongeBob. What's the first thing you do?
SpongeBob: 1924?
Mrs. Puff: No...no. First thing is to...start the boat. [Mrs. Puff turns it on as SpongeBob begins to shake and scream hysterically] SpongeBob! SpongeBob! Relax! It's only the boat.
SpongeBob: [stops] The boat?
Mrs. Puff: Okay, now, what do you do next?
SpongeBob: Floor it?
Mrs. Puff: Yes-- no! No! Don't floor it!
SpongeBob: Floor it?!
Mrs. Puff: No, no, don't, don't floor it!
SpongeBob: Okay, floor it! [kicks down on the gas pedal as the boat begins to go in reverse at high speeds, Mrs. Puff and SpongeBob screaming, "no, no, no!" and
Mrs. Puff: First we must--
SpongeBob: First I must pass the oral exam! I am confident in my abilities to successfully succeed.
Mrs. Puff: I know. Okay. Number one, what is the front of the boat?
SpongeBob: The bow.
Mrs. Puff: What is the back?
SpongeBob: Stern!
Mrs. Puff: Number three. Right is--
SpongeBob: Starboard! [answering the remaining questions] Port, skipper, deck, cabin, gally, keel, 1924!
Mrs. Puff: You've passed the oral test. What a surprise. Now, it's time to once again take the driving portion of the exam. Okay, SpongeBob...get in the boat.
SpongeBob: Oh, wha...in this boat? Right here? [looks at watch nervously] Is it time already?
Mrs. Puff: Get in the boat, SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: Oh, yeah, absolutely. [gets into boat and closes eyes with a smile, confidently]
Mrs. Puff: All you have to do is get on the track. [SpongeBob's eyes spring open in awe as he looks down the track which becomes longer and longer in delusion] Okay, SpongeBob. What's the first thing you do?
SpongeBob: 1924?
Mrs. Puff: No...no. First thing is to...start the boat. [Mrs. Puff turns it on as SpongeBob begins to shake and scream hysterically] SpongeBob! SpongeBob! Relax! It's only the boat.
SpongeBob: [stops] The boat?
Mrs. Puff: Okay, now, what do you do next?
SpongeBob: Floor it?
Mrs. Puff: Yes-- no! No! Don't floor it!
SpongeBob: Floor it?!
Mrs. Puff: No, no, don't, don't floor it!
SpongeBob: Okay, floor it! [kicks down on the gas pedal as the boat begins to go in reverse at high speeds, Mrs. Puff and SpongeBob screaming, "no, no, no!" and
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
[at the beginning of SpongeBob's 39th boating test]
Patrick: [through radio] Pat to Sponge. Pat to Sponge. Testing, testing. Testing, testing, testing, testing... TESTING! TEST! TEST! DO YOU READ?!
SpongeBob: Sponge to Pat, I read you loud and clear.
Patrick: Got your apple ready? [SpongeBob takes out apple] Lucky undergarments? [adjusting telescope] Hold on, hold on. [sees SpongeBob wearing underpants that say "LUCKY"] Bingo! Underwear, Apple, and Me! You're ready to get that license!
Patrick: [through radio] Pat to Sponge. Pat to Sponge. Testing, testing. Testing, testing, testing, testing... TESTING! TEST! TEST! DO YOU READ?!
SpongeBob: Sponge to Pat, I read you loud and clear.
Patrick: Got your apple ready? [SpongeBob takes out apple] Lucky undergarments? [adjusting telescope] Hold on, hold on. [sees SpongeBob wearing underpants that say "LUCKY"] Bingo! Underwear, Apple, and Me! You're ready to get that license!
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
Mrs. Puff: No, no! Don't floor it!
SpongeBob: Floor it? Okay, floor it! [almost floors the boat]
Patrick: Freeze, mister! Big toe.
[SpongeBob's big toe slides out and he floors the boat slowly]
SpongeBob: Floor it? Okay, floor it! [almost floors the boat]
Patrick: Freeze, mister! Big toe.
[SpongeBob's big toe slides out and he floors the boat slowly]
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
[near the end of the driving test]
SpongeBob: I'm cheating, Mrs. Puff! I'm cheating!
Mrs. Puff: It's okay, SpongeBob! You can cheat! Cheat that way! [points towards the finish line]
SpongeBob: NO! I'm cheating!
SpongeBob: I'm cheating, Mrs. Puff! I'm cheating!
Mrs. Puff: It's okay, SpongeBob! You can cheat! Cheat that way! [points towards the finish line]
SpongeBob: NO! I'm cheating!
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
Squidward: Let go of the pizza!
SpongeBob: No! It's for the customer!
Squidward: Who cares about the customer?
SpongeBob: I do!
Squidward: Well, I don't!
SpongeBob: [wind stops momentarily, SpongeBob gasps]Squidward![blown away by the wind]
SpongeBob: No! It's for the customer!
Squidward: Who cares about the customer?
SpongeBob: I do!
Squidward: Well, I don't!
SpongeBob: [wind stops momentarily, SpongeBob gasps]Squidward![blown away by the wind]
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
[SpongeBob has backed the boat all the way out into the wilderness]
SpongeBob: Backing up! Backing up! Backing up!
[The engine sputters and dies, and the boat slows to a halt. SpongeBob is seen clutching the steering wheel, his eyes wide and his pupils fixed]
SpongeBob: Backing up...
Squidward: Well, you backed up. And you know what? I think we're out of gas. [climbs out of the boat] And you know what else? WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE!
SpongeBob: [approaches Squidward with the pizza] And you know what else, else? I think the pizza's getting cold.
Squidward: [mock alarm] AND the pizza's cold?! Oh, the pizza's cold! Not the pizza! [genuine anger] Oh, how can it get any worse?
[Squidward kicks the boat angrily. The needle on the gas gauge points to FULL, and the boat springs to life and zooms away, leaving SpongeBob and Squidward all alone in the wilderness]
SpongeBob: Backing up! Backing up! Backing up!
[The engine sputters and dies, and the boat slows to a halt. SpongeBob is seen clutching the steering wheel, his eyes wide and his pupils fixed]
SpongeBob: Backing up...
Squidward: Well, you backed up. And you know what? I think we're out of gas. [climbs out of the boat] And you know what else? WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE!
SpongeBob: [approaches Squidward with the pizza] And you know what else, else? I think the pizza's getting cold.
Squidward: [mock alarm] AND the pizza's cold?! Oh, the pizza's cold! Not the pizza! [genuine anger] Oh, how can it get any worse?
[Squidward kicks the boat angrily. The needle on the gas gauge points to FULL, and the boat springs to life and zooms away, leaving SpongeBob and Squidward all alone in the wilderness]
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
[SpongeBob and Squidward are making their way through the wilderness]
Squidward: Ow, ow, ow...
SpongeBob: [singing] The Krusty Krab Pizza is the pizza for you and me! The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza--
Squidward: And my feet are killing me.
Squidward: Ow, ow, ow...
SpongeBob: [singing] The Krusty Krab Pizza is the pizza for you and me! The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza--
Squidward: And my feet are killing me.
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
Squidward: SpongeBob, that's just a stupid boulder!
SpongeBob: It's not just a boulder! It's a rock! [begins weeping] It's a rock. [sobbing] A roock! A roock! A rooock!
[Squidward looks on with disgust]
SpongeBob: [climbing on top of the boulder] It's a big, beautiful, old rock! Oh, the pioneers used to ride these babies for miles! And it's in great shape.
Squidward: SpongeBob! Will you forget the stupid pioneers? Have you ever noticed that there are none of them left? That's because they were lousy hitchhikers, ate coral, and took directions from algae! And now you're telling me they thought they could drive-- [SpongeBob drives the rock over him, squashing him flat into the ground] ...rocks?
SpongeBob: It's not just a boulder! It's a rock! [begins weeping] It's a rock. [sobbing] A roock! A roock! A rooock!
[Squidward looks on with disgust]
SpongeBob: [climbing on top of the boulder] It's a big, beautiful, old rock! Oh, the pioneers used to ride these babies for miles! And it's in great shape.
Squidward: SpongeBob! Will you forget the stupid pioneers? Have you ever noticed that there are none of them left? That's because they were lousy hitchhikers, ate coral, and took directions from algae! And now you're telling me they thought they could drive-- [SpongeBob drives the rock over him, squashing him flat into the ground] ...rocks?
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
[SpongeBob and Squidward are walking in the wilderness]
SpongeBob: [singing] The Krusty Krab Pizza is the pizza, absolutivally! [making spitting sounds] The pbbth-pbbb-pbbh pizza pbbbbh-pbbbh pizza, pbb-pbbbh-ooga-bah-bah... [muttering rhythmically] The [mumbling] pizza [mumbling] pizza [mumbling] pizza... [with voice of Otto from The Simpsons] Krusty Krraaaaaaaaabbb pizza is the pizza, yeah-ah-ah, for you and [high pitched] MEEEEEEEEE!
SpongeBob: [singing] The Krusty Krab Pizza is the pizza, absolutivally! [making spitting sounds] The pbbth-pbbb-pbbh pizza pbbbbh-pbbbh pizza, pbb-pbbbh-ooga-bah-bah... [muttering rhythmically] The [mumbling] pizza [mumbling] pizza [mumbling] pizza... [with voice of Otto from The Simpsons] Krusty Krraaaaaaaaabbb pizza is the pizza, yeah-ah-ah, for you and [high pitched] MEEEEEEEEE!
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
[SpongeBob and Squidward are totally lost in the wilderness, and are becoming worn out and hungry]
Squidward: Sponge, we've gotta eat something!
SpongeBob: I heard that in times of hardship, the pioneers would eat coral.
[Squidward grabs a piece of coral and crams it into his mouth]
SpongeBob: No, wait, it wasn't coral.
[Squidward spits the coral out]
SpongeBob: Maybe it was sand...no, mud...
Squidward: Gimme the pizza!
SpongeBob: Wait, I remember now! It was coral!
Squidward: Sponge, we've gotta eat something!
SpongeBob: I heard that in times of hardship, the pioneers would eat coral.
[Squidward grabs a piece of coral and crams it into his mouth]
SpongeBob: No, wait, it wasn't coral.
[Squidward spits the coral out]
SpongeBob: Maybe it was sand...no, mud...
Squidward: Gimme the pizza!
SpongeBob: Wait, I remember now! It was coral!
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
Spongebob: I can't wait to see the look on our customer's face! [rings doorbell]
Tom: Yeah?
Spongebob: Congratulations, Sir! Your Krabby Patty Pizza is here!
Tom: Wow, thanks. I've been dying for one of these. Where's my drink?
Spongebob: What drink?
Tom: My drink! My Diet Dr. Kelp?! Don't tell me you forgot my drink!
Spongebob: [checks order] But you didn't order any...
Tom: [aggravated] How am I supposed to eat this pizza without my drink?!
Spongebob: But..but... [tears start rolling down his face]
Tom: Didn't you ever once think of the customer?!? [gives back the pizza] You call yourself a delivery boy?! WELL I AIN'T BUYING!!! [Tom slams the door on Spongebob's face Spongebob then walks over to Squidward smiling and attempting not to cry]
Squidward: Sponge? Sponge? It's okay. Sponge?
[Spongebob drops the pizza, falls over, bursts into tears, and absorbs them]
Squidward: Sponge? [Squidward gets angry, picks up the pizza, marches up to Tom's house, and knocks on the door]
Tom: Another one? Look, I told your little friend I ain't paying for that!
Squidward: Well, THIS one's on the HOUSE! [hurls the pizza into Tom's face. Later he approaches SpongeBob, who is sprawled face down on the ground in a pool of tears]
SpongeBob: [looking up tearfully] Did he change his mind?
Squidward: He sure did. Ate the whole thing in one bite.
Tom: Yeah?
Spongebob: Congratulations, Sir! Your Krabby Patty Pizza is here!
Tom: Wow, thanks. I've been dying for one of these. Where's my drink?
Spongebob: What drink?
Tom: My drink! My Diet Dr. Kelp?! Don't tell me you forgot my drink!
Spongebob: [checks order] But you didn't order any...
Tom: [aggravated] How am I supposed to eat this pizza without my drink?!
Spongebob: But..but... [tears start rolling down his face]
Tom: Didn't you ever once think of the customer?!? [gives back the pizza] You call yourself a delivery boy?! WELL I AIN'T BUYING!!! [Tom slams the door on Spongebob's face Spongebob then walks over to Squidward smiling and attempting not to cry]
Squidward: Sponge? Sponge? It's okay. Sponge?
[Spongebob drops the pizza, falls over, bursts into tears, and absorbs them]
Squidward: Sponge? [Squidward gets angry, picks up the pizza, marches up to Tom's house, and knocks on the door]
Tom: Another one? Look, I told your little friend I ain't paying for that!
Squidward: Well, THIS one's on the HOUSE! [hurls the pizza into Tom's face. Later he approaches SpongeBob, who is sprawled face down on the ground in a pool of tears]
SpongeBob: [looking up tearfully] Did he change his mind?
Squidward: He sure did. Ate the whole thing in one bite.
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
SpongeBob: [to Mrs. Puff in his dream] Mrs. Puff, look! I finally got my driver's license!
Mrs. Puff: Not even in your dreams, Mr. SquarePants! [snatches SpongeBob's license out of his hands and tears it to shreds]
SpongeBob: NOOOOOO!
Mrs. Puff: Not even in your dreams, Mr. SquarePants! [snatches SpongeBob's license out of his hands and tears it to shreds]
SpongeBob: NOOOOOO!
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
Squidward: SpongeBob, is it time already for you to ruin my day?
Patrick: Is it time already to ruin Squid's day? Don't start without me!
Patrick: Is it time already to ruin Squid's day? Don't start without me!
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
SpongeBob: Yeah, I like sleep overs.
Squidward: [half asleep] Yeah, me too.
Spongebob: Yep, this is great. Good night, Squidward!
Squidward: [yawns] Good night, Spongebob. [eyes burst open, realizing what is happening][sternly] Good night, Spongebob.[slams door, leaving Spongebob & Gary out]
Squidward: [half asleep] Yeah, me too.
Spongebob: Yep, this is great. Good night, Squidward!
Squidward: [yawns] Good night, Spongebob. [eyes burst open, realizing what is happening][sternly] Good night, Spongebob.[slams door, leaving Spongebob & Gary out]
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
SpongeBob: Do you remember the time the food supply in Atlantis was running low!? So you invented a ray gun that made things grow six times their size to shoot at the kelp gardens? But then, the evil Manray swoops down and swipes the gun away and starts shooting all the algae! [imitates firing a gun] And he globs onto the undersea dome! [falls onto a table] And he starts sucking on the glass! [drools as he speaks, his mouth on the table. He then notices the annoyed senior who is at the same table and sucks his drool back]
Barnacle Boy: What's your point, kid?
SpongeBob: You guys are the greatest heroes of all time and I think you should come out of retirement.
Barnacle Boy: What's your point, kid?
SpongeBob: You guys are the greatest heroes of all time and I think you should come out of retirement.
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
Mermaid Man: I did it! I feel five years younger! Oh, it's good to be back!
Barnacle Boy: [kindly] We did it, ya old coot.
Mermaid Man: Who are you?
Barnacle Boy: [kindly] We did it, ya old coot.
Mermaid Man: Who are you?
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
Mermaid Man: [to SpongeBob] Listen up you villains, I wanna eat my meatloaf. If you don't get out of here, then by the power invested in me, I now pronounce you man and wife!
Clerk: [bursts in] What is going on in here?!
Mermaid Man: [looks at clerk but points to Spongebob] You may kiss the bride!
[The clerk throws SpongeBob out while wedding music plays. SpongeBob rolls all the way back to his home where Patrick is waiting]
Patrick: Did you reunite our heroes?
SpongeBob: No. But I'm married.
Clerk: [bursts in] What is going on in here?!
Mermaid Man: [looks at clerk but points to Spongebob] You may kiss the bride!
[The clerk throws SpongeBob out while wedding music plays. SpongeBob rolls all the way back to his home where Patrick is waiting]
Patrick: Did you reunite our heroes?
SpongeBob: No. But I'm married.
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants
SpongeBob: [wearing a dress, speaking in heavy feminine country accent] Oh, my. This purse is so big and heavy.
Patrick: [wearing robber garb] Hold it right there, ma’am. I’ll be taking that! [grabs purse]
SpongeBob: [screams] Hay-ulp! Hay-ulp! Hay-ulp! [Barnacle Boy stomps over]
Patrick: [hiding] It's working!
SpongeBob: Why, are you here to rescue little ol' me?
Barnacle Boy: PIPE DOWN! You're gonna wake Mermaid Man and he's ornery when his nap is disturbed. [Mermaid Man is seen with his face frozen in place]
SpongeBob: Ever alert, Mermaid Man has trained himself to sleep with his eyes open!
Barnacle Boy: Confound it! Get away from him!
Mermaid Man: [to Barnacle Boy]STOP SHOUTIN'! I'M NAPPIN'!
Barnacle Boy: IT'S NOT ME, YA OL' COOT!!!!!!
Patrick: [wearing robber garb] Hold it right there, ma’am. I’ll be taking that! [grabs purse]
SpongeBob: [screams] Hay-ulp! Hay-ulp! Hay-ulp! [Barnacle Boy stomps over]
Patrick: [hiding] It's working!
SpongeBob: Why, are you here to rescue little ol' me?
Barnacle Boy: PIPE DOWN! You're gonna wake Mermaid Man and he's ornery when his nap is disturbed. [Mermaid Man is seen with his face frozen in place]
SpongeBob: Ever alert, Mermaid Man has trained himself to sleep with his eyes open!
Barnacle Boy: Confound it! Get away from him!
Mermaid Man: [to Barnacle Boy]STOP SHOUTIN'! I'M NAPPIN'!
Barnacle Boy: IT'S NOT ME, YA OL' COOT!!!!!!
TV Show: SpongeBob SquarePants