The Big Lebowski Quotes
The Dude : Mr. Treehorn treats objects like women, man.
Malibu Police Chief : Mr. Treehorn draws a lot of water in this town. You don't draw shit, Lebowski. Now we got a nice, quiet little beach community here, and I aim to keep it nice and quiet. So let me make something plain. I don't like you sucking around, bothering our citizens, Lebowski. I don't like your jerk-off name. I don't like your jerk-off face. I don't like your jerk-off behavior, and I don't like you, jerk-off. Do I make myself clear?
The Dude : [ after a pause ] I'm sorry, I wasn't listening.
Malibu Police Chief : Mr. Treehorn draws a lot of water in this town. You don't draw shit, Lebowski. Now we got a nice, quiet little beach community here, and I aim to keep it nice and quiet. So let me make something plain. I don't like you sucking around, bothering our citizens, Lebowski. I don't like your jerk-off name. I don't like your jerk-off face. I don't like your jerk-off behavior, and I don't like you, jerk-off. Do I make myself clear?
The Dude : [ after a pause ] I'm sorry, I wasn't listening.
Movie: The Big Lebowski
Bunny Lebowski : Blow on them.
The Dude : You want me to blow on your toes?
Bunny Lebowski : I can't blow that far.
The Dude : [ looks at man lazing in the pool ] Are you sure he won't mind?
Bunny Lebowski : Uli doesn't care about anything. He's a Nihilist.
The Dude : Ah, that must be exhausting.
The Dude : You want me to blow on your toes?
Bunny Lebowski : I can't blow that far.
The Dude : [ looks at man lazing in the pool ] Are you sure he won't mind?
Bunny Lebowski : Uli doesn't care about anything. He's a Nihilist.
The Dude : Ah, that must be exhausting.
Movie: The Big Lebowski
The Dude : This is the fuckin' guy! I can find this fuckin' Lebowski guy!
Donny : His name's Lebowski? That's your name, Dude!
Donny : His name's Lebowski? That's your name, Dude!
Movie: The Big Lebowski
The Dude : Yes, Walter, you're right. There is an unspoken message here. It's "FUCK YOU, LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!" Yeah, I'll be at practice.
Movie: The Big Lebowski
The Dude : Who the fuck are you, man?
Knox Harrington : [ giggles ] Oh, just a friend of Maudie's.
The Dude : Yeah, a friend with a cleft asshole?
Knox Harrington : [ giggles ] Oh, just a friend of Maudie's.
The Dude : Yeah, a friend with a cleft asshole?
Movie: The Big Lebowski
Maude Lebowski : Uli Kunkol? Her co-star in the beaver picture?
The Dude : Beaver? Uhhhh, you mean vagina...? I mean, you know the guy?
Maude Lebowski : Oh, I might have introduced them for all I know. [ looks at Knox ]
Maude Lebowski : You remember Uli?
Knox Harrington : Mmmmm.
The Dude : Beaver? Uhhhh, you mean vagina...? I mean, you know the guy?
Maude Lebowski : Oh, I might have introduced them for all I know. [ looks at Knox ]
Maude Lebowski : You remember Uli?
Knox Harrington : Mmmmm.
Movie: The Big Lebowski
Walter Sobchak : Donny was a good bowler, and a good man. He was one of us. He was a man who loved the outdoors... and bowling, and as a surfer he explored the beaches of Southern California, from La Jolla to Leo Carrillo and... up to... Pismo. He died, like so many young men of his generation, he died before his time. In your wisdom, Lord, you took him, as you took so many bright flowering young men at Khe Sanh, at Langdok, at Hill 364. These young men gave their lives. And so would Donny. Donny, who loved bowling. And so, Theodore Donald Karabotsos, in accordance with what we think your dying wishes might well have been, we commit your final mortal remains to the bosom of the Pacific Ocean, which you loved so well. Good night, sweet prince.
Movie: The Big Lebowski
[ first lines ]
The Stranger : [ voiceover ] Way out west there was this fella... fella I wanna tell ya about. Fella by the name of Jeff Lebowski. At least that was the handle his loving parents gave him, but he never had much use for it himself. Mr. Lebowski, he called himself "The Dude". Now, "Dude" - that's a name no one would self-apply where I come from. But then there was a lot about the Dude that didn't make a whole lot of sense. And a lot about where he lived, likewise. But then again, maybe that's why I found the place so darned interestin'. They call Los Angeles the "City Of Angels." I didn't find it to be that, exactly. But I'll allow there are some nice folks there. 'Course I can't say I've seen London, and I ain't never been to France. And I ain't never seen no queen in her damned undies, so the feller says. But I'll tell you what - after seeing Los Angeles, and this here story I'm about to unfold, well, I guess I seen somethin' every bit as stupefyin' as you'd see in any of them other places. And in English, too. So I can die with a smile on my face, without feelin' like the good Lord gypped me. Now this here story I'm about to unfold took place back in the early '90s - just about the time of our conflict with Sad'm and the I-raqis. I only mention it because sometimes there's a man... I won't say a hero, 'cause, what's a hero? But sometimes, there's a man. And I'm talkin' about the Dude here. Sometimes, there's a man, well, he's the man for his time and place. He fits right in there. And that's the Dude, in Los Angeles. And even if he's a lazy man - and the Dude was most certainly that. Quite possibly the laziest in Los Angeles County, which would place him high in the runnin' for laziest worldwide. But sometimes there's a man, sometimes, there's a man. Aw. I lost my train of thought here. But... aw, hell. I've done introduced him enough.
The Stranger : [ voiceover ] Way out west there was this fella... fella I wanna tell ya about. Fella by the name of Jeff Lebowski. At least that was the handle his loving parents gave him, but he never had much use for it himself. Mr. Lebowski, he called himself "The Dude". Now, "Dude" - that's a name no one would self-apply where I come from. But then there was a lot about the Dude that didn't make a whole lot of sense. And a lot about where he lived, likewise. But then again, maybe that's why I found the place so darned interestin'. They call Los Angeles the "City Of Angels." I didn't find it to be that, exactly. But I'll allow there are some nice folks there. 'Course I can't say I've seen London, and I ain't never been to France. And I ain't never seen no queen in her damned undies, so the feller says. But I'll tell you what - after seeing Los Angeles, and this here story I'm about to unfold, well, I guess I seen somethin' every bit as stupefyin' as you'd see in any of them other places. And in English, too. So I can die with a smile on my face, without feelin' like the good Lord gypped me. Now this here story I'm about to unfold took place back in the early '90s - just about the time of our conflict with Sad'm and the I-raqis. I only mention it because sometimes there's a man... I won't say a hero, 'cause, what's a hero? But sometimes, there's a man. And I'm talkin' about the Dude here. Sometimes, there's a man, well, he's the man for his time and place. He fits right in there. And that's the Dude, in Los Angeles. And even if he's a lazy man - and the Dude was most certainly that. Quite possibly the laziest in Los Angeles County, which would place him high in the runnin' for laziest worldwide. But sometimes there's a man, sometimes, there's a man. Aw. I lost my train of thought here. But... aw, hell. I've done introduced him enough.
Movie: The Big Lebowski
The Dude : Walter, I love you, but sooner or later, you're going to have to face the fact you're a goddamn moron.
Movie: The Big Lebowski
The Big Lebowski : Start talking and talk fast you lousy bum.
Brandt : We've been frantically trying to reach you, Dude.
The Big Lebowski : Where is my goddamn money you bum?
Brandt : We've been frantically trying to reach you, Dude.
The Big Lebowski : Where is my goddamn money you bum?
Movie: The Big Lebowski
The Dude : Just take it easy man.
Walter Sobchak : I'm perfectly calm Dude.
The Dude : [ shouting ] Yeah, waving the fucking gun around?
Walter Sobchak : Calmer than you are.
The Dude : Will you just take it easy?
Walter Sobchak : Calmer than you are.
Walter Sobchak : I'm perfectly calm Dude.
The Dude : [ shouting ] Yeah, waving the fucking gun around?
Walter Sobchak : Calmer than you are.
The Dude : Will you just take it easy?
Walter Sobchak : Calmer than you are.
Movie: The Big Lebowski
The Dude : Ah, fuck it.
The Big Lebowski : Fuck it! Yes! That's your answer. That's your answer for everything! Tattoo it on your forehead!
The Big Lebowski : Fuck it! Yes! That's your answer. That's your answer for everything! Tattoo it on your forehead!
Movie: The Big Lebowski
The Dude : Oh, fuck me, man! That kid already spent all the money, man!
Walter Sobchak : New 'Vette? Hardly, Dude. I'd say he's still got about $960 - $970,000 left, depending on the options.
Walter Sobchak : New 'Vette? Hardly, Dude. I'd say he's still got about $960 - $970,000 left, depending on the options.
Movie: The Big Lebowski
Walter Sobchak : Life does not stop and start at your convenience, you miserable piece of shit.
Donny : What's wrong with Walter, Dude?
Donny : What's wrong with Walter, Dude?
Movie: The Big Lebowski
[ at the funeral parlor ]
Walter Sobchak : GOD DAMN IT! Look, just because we're bereaved, that doesn't make us saps!
Walter Sobchak : GOD DAMN IT! Look, just because we're bereaved, that doesn't make us saps!
Movie: The Big Lebowski
The Dude : I only said I THOUGHT she kidnapped herself. You're the one who's so fucking certain!
Walter Sobchak : That's right, Dude. 100% certain.
Walter Sobchak : That's right, Dude. 100% certain.
Movie: The Big Lebowski
Walter Sobchak : Etz chaim he dude, as the ex used to say.
The Dude : What the fuck is that supposed to mean? What the fuck are we gonna tell Lebowski?
Walter Sobchak : Huh? [ blows out a cloud of smoke ]
Walter Sobchak : Oh, him! Er... [ mutters incoherently ]
Walter Sobchak : What exactly is the problem?
The Dude : Well, the problem is... W-what do you mean "what's the"... umph... Th-there was no... We d- we didn't eh... uhumph... They're gonna kill that poor woman! Man!
Walter Sobchak : What the fuck are you talking about? That poor woman... that poor SLUT kidnapped herself. Come on dude, you said so yourself.
The Dude : Man...! I said I THOUGHT she kidnapped herself... YOU'RE the one who's so fucking certain!
Walter Sobchak : That's right dude. One hundred percent certain.
The Dude : What the fuck is that supposed to mean? What the fuck are we gonna tell Lebowski?
Walter Sobchak : Huh? [ blows out a cloud of smoke ]
Walter Sobchak : Oh, him! Er... [ mutters incoherently ]
Walter Sobchak : What exactly is the problem?
The Dude : Well, the problem is... W-what do you mean "what's the"... umph... Th-there was no... We d- we didn't eh... uhumph... They're gonna kill that poor woman! Man!
Walter Sobchak : What the fuck are you talking about? That poor woman... that poor SLUT kidnapped herself. Come on dude, you said so yourself.
The Dude : Man...! I said I THOUGHT she kidnapped herself... YOU'RE the one who's so fucking certain!
Walter Sobchak : That's right dude. One hundred percent certain.
Movie: The Big Lebowski
The Dude : Look, nothing is fucked, here, man.
The Big Lebowski : Nothing is fucked? [ shouting ]
The Big Lebowski : The god damn plane has crashed into the mountain!
The Big Lebowski : Nothing is fucked? [ shouting ]
The Big Lebowski : The god damn plane has crashed into the mountain!
Movie: The Big Lebowski
Walter Sobchak : Now that is just ridiculous, Dude. Nobody is going to cut your dick off. Not if I have anything to say about it.
The Dude : Thank you Walter, that makes me feel very secure, it makes me feel very warm inside.
The Dude : Thank you Walter, that makes me feel very secure, it makes me feel very warm inside.
Movie: The Big Lebowski
Walter Sobchak : Is this your homework, Larry? Is this your homework, Larry?
The Dude : Look, man...
Walter Sobchak : Dude, please? Is this your homework, Larry?
The Dude : Just ask him about the car.
Walter Sobchak : Is this yours, Larry? Is this your homework, Larry?
The Dude : Is that your car out front?
Walter Sobchak : Is this your homework, Larry?
The Dude : We know it's his fucking homework! Where's the fucking money, you little brat?
Walter Sobchak : Look, Larry. Have you ever heard of Vietnam?
The Dude : Oh, for Christ's sake, Walter...
Walter Sobchak : You're entering a world of pain, son. We know that this is your homework. We know that you stole a car.
The Dude : And the fucking money.
Walter Sobchak : And the fucking money. And, we know that this is your homework.
The Dude : We're going to cut your dick off, Larry.
Walter Sobchak : You're killing your father, Larry!
The Dude : Look, man...
Walter Sobchak : Dude, please? Is this your homework, Larry?
The Dude : Just ask him about the car.
Walter Sobchak : Is this yours, Larry? Is this your homework, Larry?
The Dude : Is that your car out front?
Walter Sobchak : Is this your homework, Larry?
The Dude : We know it's his fucking homework! Where's the fucking money, you little brat?
Walter Sobchak : Look, Larry. Have you ever heard of Vietnam?
The Dude : Oh, for Christ's sake, Walter...
Walter Sobchak : You're entering a world of pain, son. We know that this is your homework. We know that you stole a car.
The Dude : And the fucking money.
Walter Sobchak : And the fucking money. And, we know that this is your homework.
The Dude : We're going to cut your dick off, Larry.
Walter Sobchak : You're killing your father, Larry!
Movie: The Big Lebowski
Walter Sobchak : That's not her toe, Dude.
The Dude : Then whose toe is it, Walter?
Walter Sobchak : How the fuck should I know?
The Dude : Then whose toe is it, Walter?
Walter Sobchak : How the fuck should I know?
Movie: The Big Lebowski
Jackie Treehorn : People forget that the brain is the biggest erogenous zone.
The Dude : On you maybe.
The Dude : On you maybe.
Movie: The Big Lebowski
The Big Lebowski : Your revolution is over, Mr. Lebowski. Condolences. The bums lost. My advice is to do what your parents did; get a job, sir. The bums will always lose. Do you hear me, Lebowski? [ the Dude walks out and shuts the door ]
The Big Lebowski : The bums will always lose!
Brandt : How was your meeting, Mr. Lebowski?
The Dude : Okay. The old man told me to take any rug in the house.
The Big Lebowski : The bums will always lose!
Brandt : How was your meeting, Mr. Lebowski?
The Dude : Okay. The old man told me to take any rug in the house.
Movie: The Big Lebowski
Da Fino, Private Snoop : I'm a brother shamus!
The Dude : Brother Seamus? Like an Irish monk?
Da Fino, Private Snoop : What the fuck are you talking about?
The Dude : Brother Seamus? Like an Irish monk?
Da Fino, Private Snoop : What the fuck are you talking about?
Movie: The Big Lebowski
Da Fino : Well maybe you and me could pool our resources, you know, trade information? Professional courtesy? Compeers, you know?
The Dude : Yeah, yeah, I get it, fuck off Da Fino. And stay away from my special - from my fucking lady friend, man!
The Dude : Yeah, yeah, I get it, fuck off Da Fino. And stay away from my special - from my fucking lady friend, man!
Movie: The Big Lebowski