The Crowd Quotes
Moss: Notice anything?
Roy: What?
Moss: Guess.
Roy: Your eyes? Something wrong with your eyes.
Moss: What? No, I have a new cup. What's wrong with my eyes?
Roy: It's not very distinctive, is it? How's anyone supposed to know it's yours?
Moss: There's a picture of me on it.
Roy: ...No there isn't!
Moss: Yes, there is.
Roy: No, there isn't Moss.
Moss: Yes, there is. I am sick of my things going walkabout. With this picture, everyone knows that a certain Mr Moss might be looking for his cup.
Roy: There is nothing on the cup!
Moss: Wrangle with him, and you will find your hands full, my friend.
Roy: Wrangle with who? There's no one there!
[a few minutes later]
Moss: Ask me where it is.
Roy: Where what is?
Moss: The picture.
Roy: OK. Where's the picture, Moss?
Moss: It's on the base, Roy.
Roy: What?
Moss: Guess.
Roy: Your eyes? Something wrong with your eyes.
Moss: What? No, I have a new cup. What's wrong with my eyes?
Roy: It's not very distinctive, is it? How's anyone supposed to know it's yours?
Moss: There's a picture of me on it.
Roy: ...No there isn't!
Moss: Yes, there is.
Roy: No, there isn't Moss.
Moss: Yes, there is. I am sick of my things going walkabout. With this picture, everyone knows that a certain Mr Moss might be looking for his cup.
Roy: There is nothing on the cup!
Moss: Wrangle with him, and you will find your hands full, my friend.
Roy: Wrangle with who? There's no one there!
[a few minutes later]
Moss: Ask me where it is.
Roy: Where what is?
Moss: The picture.
Roy: OK. Where's the picture, Moss?
Moss: It's on the base, Roy.
Movie: The Crowd
Moss: Now, let's see what we have here.
[bends over to read fire extinguisher]
Moss: "Stand upright"
[stands upright]
Moss: Well, now I can't read it. Oh! Not me. I AM a giddy goat.
[bends over to read fire extinguisher]
Moss: "Stand upright"
[stands upright]
Moss: Well, now I can't read it. Oh! Not me. I AM a giddy goat.
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Moss: Richmond's-out-of-his-room-he's-not-in-his-room-he's-supposed-to-be-in-his-room-why-is-he-out-of-his-room?
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Moss: Roy's stuck under a desk.
Jen: Stuck under a desk?
Moss: Yes, that is an unusual text isn't it, it isn't just me.
Jen: Stuck under a desk?
Moss: Yes, that is an unusual text isn't it, it isn't just me.
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Moss: Subject: Fire. Dear Sir/Madam, I am writing to inform you of a fire that has broken out on the premises of 123 Cavendon Road... no, that's too formal.
[deletes text, starts again]
Moss: Fire - exclamation mark - fire - exclamation mark - help me - exclamation mark. 123 Cavendon Road. Looking forward to hearing from you. Yours truly, Maurice Moss.
[sigh of relief]
[deletes text, starts again]
Moss: Fire - exclamation mark - fire - exclamation mark - help me - exclamation mark. 123 Cavendon Road. Looking forward to hearing from you. Yours truly, Maurice Moss.
[sigh of relief]
Movie: The Crowd
Moss: What the heck is Tapas?
Jen: You know Tapas, tiny food from Spain.
Moss: Oh yes tape-as.
Jen: Yeah, that's not how you say it.
Moss: Oh yes it is.
Jen: You're a tape ass!
Jen: You know Tapas, tiny food from Spain.
Moss: Oh yes tape-as.
Jen: Yeah, that's not how you say it.
Moss: Oh yes it is.
Jen: You're a tape ass!
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Moss: What was all that about?
Roy: Well, like all women, she's shoe mad.
Moss: That's a bit sexist, isn't it?
Roy: Do you know one woman who isn't obsessed with shoes?
Roy: Well, like all women, she's shoe mad.
Moss: That's a bit sexist, isn't it?
Roy: Do you know one woman who isn't obsessed with shoes?
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Prime: [to Roy] Countdown groupies are the most sexually voracious of all groupies, and the most beautiful.
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Roy: [answers phone] Hello, IT. Have you tried turning it off and on again? Ugh, OK, well the button on the side, is it glowing?... Yeah, you need to turn it on. Erm, the button turns it on. Yeah, you... you do know how a button works don't you? No, not on clothes.
Moss: [answers other phone] Hello, IT. Yeah-ha. Have you tried forcing an unexpected reboot?
Roy: [still on phone] No, there you go. No, there you go. I just heard it come on. No no, that's the music you hear when it comes on. No that's the music you hear when... I'm sorry are you from the past?
Moss: [still on phone] See. the driver hooks the function by patching the system call table, so it's not safe to unload it unless another thread's about to jump in and do its stuff, and you don't want to end up in the middle of invalid memory... Hello?
[puts phone down]
Roy: [still on phone] Oh really? Really? Well, why don't you come down here and make me, then? What? You think I'm afraid of you? I'm not afraid of you. You can come down here any time and I'll be waiting for you!
[hangs up phone]
Roy: That told her.
Moss: [answers other phone] Hello, IT. Yeah-ha. Have you tried forcing an unexpected reboot?
Roy: [still on phone] No, there you go. No, there you go. I just heard it come on. No no, that's the music you hear when it comes on. No that's the music you hear when... I'm sorry are you from the past?
Moss: [still on phone] See. the driver hooks the function by patching the system call table, so it's not safe to unload it unless another thread's about to jump in and do its stuff, and you don't want to end up in the middle of invalid memory... Hello?
[puts phone down]
Roy: [still on phone] Oh really? Really? Well, why don't you come down here and make me, then? What? You think I'm afraid of you? I'm not afraid of you. You can come down here any time and I'll be waiting for you!
[hangs up phone]
Roy: That told her.
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Roy: Did you use a soldering iron to make that stress machine?
Moss: Yes.
Roy: You turned it off?
Moss: Oh I'm fairly sure I did.
Roy: Because you remember what happened last time, right?
Moss: Yes. That was very funny!
Roy: Well, no, no. It was very dangerous and someone nearly died.
Moss: Right. No. Yeah, I was thinking of a different incident, the one on the golf course.
Roy: What? I'm talking about the fire.
Moss: Oh yeah. Fire. Sorry. I always get confused between "golf" and "fire".
Roy: Just make sure it's off.
Roy: It is off. I think.
Roy: Well just make sure it is.
Moss: I will make sure it is.
Roy: And if it's already off...?
Moss: ...I'll just walk away.
[Roy exits]
Moss: Get off my back. What is he, the soldering iron police?... It's off. That means I turn in on, and just walk away.
Moss: Yes.
Roy: You turned it off?
Moss: Oh I'm fairly sure I did.
Roy: Because you remember what happened last time, right?
Moss: Yes. That was very funny!
Roy: Well, no, no. It was very dangerous and someone nearly died.
Moss: Right. No. Yeah, I was thinking of a different incident, the one on the golf course.
Roy: What? I'm talking about the fire.
Moss: Oh yeah. Fire. Sorry. I always get confused between "golf" and "fire".
Roy: Just make sure it's off.
Roy: It is off. I think.
Roy: Well just make sure it is.
Moss: I will make sure it is.
Roy: And if it's already off...?
Moss: ...I'll just walk away.
[Roy exits]
Moss: Get off my back. What is he, the soldering iron police?... It's off. That means I turn in on, and just walk away.
Movie: The Crowd
Roy: Didn't know what a stress machine as this morning, and now we have two of them.
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Roy: It just goes to show that all women are shoe mad.
Moss: That's not the case.
Roy: Do you know one woman that's not shoe mad?
Moss: I only know one woman and she just left the room shouting "The shoes!"
Moss: That's not the case.
Roy: Do you know one woman that's not shoe mad?
Moss: I only know one woman and she just left the room shouting "The shoes!"
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Sgt. Francis 'Frank' Troy: [to Bathsheba] This woman is more to me dear than you ever were... or are... or could be.
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Sgt. Francis 'Frank' Troy: [Tp Bathsheba] A woman like you does more damage than she can conceivably imagine.
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Tanya: You're crazy! They're gonna see it on you out there. They're gonna see it all over you. And they'll send you back. You'll see!
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[Brittany is talking to Tom]
Brittany Foster: You're so lame right now, you'd screw up a wet dream.
Brittany Foster: You're so lame right now, you'd screw up a wet dream.
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[Trying to put out a fire and having just set the fire to the extinguisher]
Moss: I'll just put it here with the rest of the fire.
Moss: I'll just put it here with the rest of the fire.
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Adrien Williams: Brittany, you need help.
[Brittany hits her with a shovel]
Brittany Foster: No, YOU need help Adrien!
[Brittany hits her with a shovel]
Brittany Foster: No, YOU need help Adrien!
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Adrien Williams: You know Doc, we still never had that talk about this whole knocking a little ball into a hole obsession of yours.
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Cheryl Heath: I just love banana splits. Is it all the wonderful mixed-up flavors, or is it something Freudian?
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Denholm: [Seeing a fire burning behind a broken monitor frame] Nice screensaver.
Denholm: [later] I love the way the smoke seems to be coming off the top of it...
Denholm: [later] I love the way the smoke seems to be coming off the top of it...
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Douglas: [to Moss] You there, computer man. Fix my pants.
Moss: I beg your pardon.
Douglas: Pull down my trousers and do your job.
Moss: I beg your pardon.
Douglas: Pull down my trousers and do your job.
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Jen: [just got off the phone with Douglas's PA] Right, I'm off. Douglas is on his way down.
Roy: So?
Jen: Well, to be honest, he's been making advances. He keeps asking me if I want to go for a ride in his helicopter.
Roy: I wanna go for a ride in the helicopter!
Jen: Then grow a pair of tits.
Roy: [more to himself] If I did have tits, I wouldn't mind letting someone have a go on them for a ride in a helicopter.
Roy: So?
Jen: Well, to be honest, he's been making advances. He keeps asking me if I want to go for a ride in his helicopter.
Roy: I wanna go for a ride in the helicopter!
Jen: Then grow a pair of tits.
Roy: [more to himself] If I did have tits, I wouldn't mind letting someone have a go on them for a ride in a helicopter.
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Richmond: [Explaining what he's seen while at work] And this one, flash, flash, flash, then wait for it. Nothing for awhile. Here it comes. Double flash!
Jen: Wow, it's obvious you're going mad.
Jen: Wow, it's obvious you're going mad.
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Jen: I've got aunt Irma visiting
Moss: Oh do you not like aunt Irma? Ive got an aunt like that.
[Roy is shaking his head also confused]
Jen: Its my term for my time of the month.
Roy: Oh.
Moss: What time of the month? The weekend?
Jen: [Roy is trying to shut him up] No.
Moss: Does aunt Irma visit on the weekend?
Jen: You know its high tide.
Moss: But We're not on the coast
Roy: Moss!
Jen: I'm Closed for maintenance.
Moss: Closed for maintenance?
Roy: Moss!
Jen: I've fallen to the communists.
Moss: Well they do have some strong arguments.
Roy: [Finally putting it to words] Carrie Moss! First scene in Carrie!
Moss: [Finally Gets it] Ohh... Okay, yap, yap, yep, No, Nope nope yep nope naa aah...
[Walks out of the room]
Moss: Oh do you not like aunt Irma? Ive got an aunt like that.
[Roy is shaking his head also confused]
Jen: Its my term for my time of the month.
Roy: Oh.
Moss: What time of the month? The weekend?
Jen: [Roy is trying to shut him up] No.
Moss: Does aunt Irma visit on the weekend?
Jen: You know its high tide.
Moss: But We're not on the coast
Roy: Moss!
Jen: I'm Closed for maintenance.
Moss: Closed for maintenance?
Roy: Moss!
Jen: I've fallen to the communists.
Moss: Well they do have some strong arguments.
Roy: [Finally putting it to words] Carrie Moss! First scene in Carrie!
Moss: [Finally Gets it] Ohh... Okay, yap, yap, yep, No, Nope nope yep nope naa aah...
[Walks out of the room]
Movie: The Crowd
Jen: Oh for God's sake, are you gay? Are you a gay man?
Philip: No!
Jen: Are you?
Philip: No!
Jen: No, brilliant, good. That's all I wanted to know. I don't mind one way or the other, you know, I just like being clear. I don't want any ambiguity.
Philip: What on earth made you think I was gay?
Jen: Well, you know, I can just pull it out of the air. You know, you just brought me to a gay musical, called 'Gay'. You're laughing like mad at every gay reference. Your friends... ALL of whom are gay say hello by tickling you.
Philip: Jen, what century are you living in? Do you think a man has to be gay to like a gay musical? Can a straight man not have homosexual friends? And since when was tickling gay? I missed that meeting. Jen, Jen, come here
[hugs her]
Jen: I'm sorry, I guess you just threw me when you borrowed our copy of Heat.
Philip: [bursts into tears] Oh God, it's true! It's true, I'm gay! I'm a gay man. I tried to hide from it and deny it, but I can't, I can't, I can't. Oh Jen, what am I gonna do? I thought I could make it work between us coz you looked a bit like a man!
Philip: No!
Jen: Are you?
Philip: No!
Jen: No, brilliant, good. That's all I wanted to know. I don't mind one way or the other, you know, I just like being clear. I don't want any ambiguity.
Philip: What on earth made you think I was gay?
Jen: Well, you know, I can just pull it out of the air. You know, you just brought me to a gay musical, called 'Gay'. You're laughing like mad at every gay reference. Your friends... ALL of whom are gay say hello by tickling you.
Philip: Jen, what century are you living in? Do you think a man has to be gay to like a gay musical? Can a straight man not have homosexual friends? And since when was tickling gay? I missed that meeting. Jen, Jen, come here
[hugs her]
Jen: I'm sorry, I guess you just threw me when you borrowed our copy of Heat.
Philip: [bursts into tears] Oh God, it's true! It's true, I'm gay! I'm a gay man. I tried to hide from it and deny it, but I can't, I can't, I can't. Oh Jen, what am I gonna do? I thought I could make it work between us coz you looked a bit like a man!
Movie: The Crowd