The Live Ghost Quotes
Captain: If anybody ever mentions the word ghost to me, I'm gonna twist his head around so that when he's walking north he'll be looking south.
Movie: The Live Ghost
Captain: If anybody ever mentions the word "ghost" to me, I'm gonna twist his head around so that when he's walking north he'll be looking south.
Movie: The Live Ghost
Captain: Get for'ard.
Stanley: [starts to walk toward the rear door of the hold]
Captain: Heyyy - I said "FOR'ARD"!
Stanley: [turns to Ollie and leans over closer to him so Ollie can check on his forehead, thinking that the Captain is saying that something is wrong with it] What's the matter with it? Can you see anything?
Oliver: [lifts Stan's hat slightly to have a better look] There's nothing wrong with it that I can see.
Captain: [shoving them both forward impatiently] Oh, come ON, here! Come ON!
Stanley: [starts to walk toward the rear door of the hold]
Captain: Heyyy - I said "FOR'ARD"!
Stanley: [turns to Ollie and leans over closer to him so Ollie can check on his forehead, thinking that the Captain is saying that something is wrong with it] What's the matter with it? Can you see anything?
Oliver: [lifts Stan's hat slightly to have a better look] There's nothing wrong with it that I can see.
Captain: [shoving them both forward impatiently] Oh, come ON, here! Come ON!
Movie: The Live Ghost
Nick Trayne: Don't you ever sleep?
Cedric, the Butler: No sir, insomnia.
Nick Trayne: Insomnia huh? I bet he doesn't even go to sleep when it's time to get up.
Cedric, the Butler: No sir, insomnia.
Nick Trayne: Insomnia huh? I bet he doesn't even go to sleep when it's time to get up.
Movie: The Live Ghost
Nick Trayne: [locked in a room] We could be trapped here for weeks, or months.
Billie Hilton: Oh Nick.
Nick Trayne: And if we are, by the time they find us, it'll be too late.
Billie Hilton: Oh Nick.
Nick Trayne: And if we are, by the time they find us, it'll be too late.
Movie: The Live Ghost
Nick Trayne: There's got to be a way to wake everybody up.
Billie Hilton: I could scream.
Nick Trayne: Don't do that, they'll think there's been another murder.
[sees a horn on the wall]
Nick Trayne: This s hould do it
[blows the horn]
Nick Trayne: Happy New Year!
Billie Hilton: I'll help you.
[yells]
Billie Hilton: Fish! Fish! Fish! Merry Christmas!
Billie Hilton: I could scream.
Nick Trayne: Don't do that, they'll think there's been another murder.
[sees a horn on the wall]
Nick Trayne: This s hould do it
[blows the horn]
Nick Trayne: Happy New Year!
Billie Hilton: I'll help you.
[yells]
Billie Hilton: Fish! Fish! Fish! Merry Christmas!
Movie: The Live Ghost
Nick Trayne: Don't you ever sleep?
Cedric, the Butler: No sir, insomnia.
Nick Trayne: Insomnia huh? I bet he doesn't even go to sleep when it's time to get up.
Cedric, the Butler: No sir, insomnia.
Nick Trayne: Insomnia huh? I bet he doesn't even go to sleep when it's time to get up.
Movie: The Live Ghost
Oliver: [looking at a large cloth bag that they've found in the ship's hold - - they erroneously believe that they've accidentally shot the drunken sailor, and so they plan to put the sailor's body into the bag and throw it overboard before anyone else finds out] That'll do.
Stanley: Poor fella... you think he's gone to Heaven?
Oliver: [in a pompous tone of mild sorrow] I'm afraid not - - I guess probably he went to the OTHER place. Get me a large piece of coal.
Stanley: Why? Do you have to bring your own coal with you when you go to the "other place"?
Oliver: [in an exasperated tone at Laurel's "ignorance"] Why, certainly NOT - - that's to weight the bag down so it'll SINK! Now get the coal... WAIT A MINUTE -
[grabs the lantern away from Laurel as he starts to walk away]
Oliver: give me that lantern! You wanna leave me here in the DARK? Go on and get the coal! You're always thinking of yourSELF!
Stanley: Poor fella... you think he's gone to Heaven?
Oliver: [in a pompous tone of mild sorrow] I'm afraid not - - I guess probably he went to the OTHER place. Get me a large piece of coal.
Stanley: Why? Do you have to bring your own coal with you when you go to the "other place"?
Oliver: [in an exasperated tone at Laurel's "ignorance"] Why, certainly NOT - - that's to weight the bag down so it'll SINK! Now get the coal... WAIT A MINUTE -
[grabs the lantern away from Laurel as he starts to walk away]
Oliver: give me that lantern! You wanna leave me here in the DARK? Go on and get the coal! You're always thinking of yourSELF!
Movie: The Live Ghost
Oliver: [in a scoffing exasperated tone, after having searched the entire deck of the ship without finding a trace of any ghosts - - the whitewash-covered sailor HAD, in fact, re-boarded the ship and staggered back to the bunk-room and slipped into Laurel and Hardy's bunk which he drunkenly mistook for his own bunk, but he had taken a different route from where Hardy and Laurel were looking, and so neither of them had happened to see him. And Hardy doesn't know that Laurel - - not wanting to be left alone in the bunkroom while there was a ''ghost'' about - - had fearfully followed Hardy out of the bunkroom, so Hardy assumes that the lump in the bunk is Laurel] GHOSTS! You make me sick! You'll make me catch my DEATH OF COLD looking for GHOSTS!
[climbs irritably up into the bunk beside the sailor without uncovering him, and pulls his own blankets up]
Oliver: One of these days you're gonna let your imagination run AMUCK!
Stanley: [still standing outside on the deck, timidly climbs up to peer warily in through the window next to the bunk]
Oliver: [seeing Laurel through the window right next to him, and so thinking absent-mindedly that Laurel is in the bunk beside him] In the first place, there's no such thing as a GHOST! You heard what the Captain said! He - -
[suddenly realizes that something about Laurel's appearance doesn't look quite right, and so he reaches out to feel Laurel's face, but touches the glass window instead. Then, with a puzzled and slightly apprehensive, ''Well, if Laurel's outside, then who is THIS in the bunk beside me?'' expression, Hardy then reaches down and pulls back the cover beside him, revealing the drunken sailor, who sits up casually and salutes affably]
Drunken sailor: HI!
Oliver: [shrieking in terror along with La
[climbs irritably up into the bunk beside the sailor without uncovering him, and pulls his own blankets up]
Oliver: One of these days you're gonna let your imagination run AMUCK!
Stanley: [still standing outside on the deck, timidly climbs up to peer warily in through the window next to the bunk]
Oliver: [seeing Laurel through the window right next to him, and so thinking absent-mindedly that Laurel is in the bunk beside him] In the first place, there's no such thing as a GHOST! You heard what the Captain said! He - -
[suddenly realizes that something about Laurel's appearance doesn't look quite right, and so he reaches out to feel Laurel's face, but touches the glass window instead. Then, with a puzzled and slightly apprehensive, ''Well, if Laurel's outside, then who is THIS in the bunk beside me?'' expression, Hardy then reaches down and pulls back the cover beside him, revealing the drunken sailor, who sits up casually and salutes affably]
Drunken sailor: HI!
Oliver: [shrieking in terror along with La
Movie: The Live Ghost
Oliver: I'd better go in this time - - they'll know you by now.
[exchanges the frying pan for the bag of eggs]
Oliver: And lay it ohhnnn HEAVY!
[marches confidently into the tavern, looks around the room, and spots Charlie, the Greek sailor (Charles Hall) seated alone at a table near the door. They exchange amicable nod/wave gestures, and then Ollie goes over and sits down at the table across from Charlie, unaware that this is the very same sailor who was seated with the first "shanghai victim" sailor on whom Stan had played the 'egg-held-in-mouth' trick, and so Charlie has already observed the trick and thus is wise to it now. Ollie takes out an egg from his bag with a flourish and sets it self-importantly on the table between them]
Sailor at Table: [in a mildly incredulous tone that someone else would actually just happen to try the same trick on him when he had just seen this same trick pulled on his unfortunate sailor buddy less than 15 minutes earlier] What're ye gonna do with that?
Oliver: [in his typical loud pompous tone] I'll bet you a dollar that you can't put this egg in your mouth without breaking it!
Sailor at Table: [grinning in a sly 'I'm gonna have some fun with this witless blowfish' expression] Can YOU do it?
Oliver: [leaning back and fanning his lapels with his typical innocent closed eyes and disarming smile and chuckle] Why, of course!
Sailor at Table: [leaning forward slightly and pointing with a broad sneering grin of evil anticipation] You do it fuhst, then I'LL do it!
[shakes Ollie's hand in a single firm dramatic ''up-down'' motion to signify an agreed-upon deal, then watches with great amusement and repressed anticipation as Ollie confidently tucks the egg into his mouth
[exchanges the frying pan for the bag of eggs]
Oliver: And lay it ohhnnn HEAVY!
[marches confidently into the tavern, looks around the room, and spots Charlie, the Greek sailor (Charles Hall) seated alone at a table near the door. They exchange amicable nod/wave gestures, and then Ollie goes over and sits down at the table across from Charlie, unaware that this is the very same sailor who was seated with the first "shanghai victim" sailor on whom Stan had played the 'egg-held-in-mouth' trick, and so Charlie has already observed the trick and thus is wise to it now. Ollie takes out an egg from his bag with a flourish and sets it self-importantly on the table between them]
Sailor at Table: [in a mildly incredulous tone that someone else would actually just happen to try the same trick on him when he had just seen this same trick pulled on his unfortunate sailor buddy less than 15 minutes earlier] What're ye gonna do with that?
Oliver: [in his typical loud pompous tone] I'll bet you a dollar that you can't put this egg in your mouth without breaking it!
Sailor at Table: [grinning in a sly 'I'm gonna have some fun with this witless blowfish' expression] Can YOU do it?
Oliver: [leaning back and fanning his lapels with his typical innocent closed eyes and disarming smile and chuckle] Why, of course!
Sailor at Table: [leaning forward slightly and pointing with a broad sneering grin of evil anticipation] You do it fuhst, then I'LL do it!
[shakes Ollie's hand in a single firm dramatic ''up-down'' motion to signify an agreed-upon deal, then watches with great amusement and repressed anticipation as Ollie confidently tucks the egg into his mouth
Movie: The Live Ghost
Stanley: We heard the sea is infactuated with sharks.
Oliver: Not infactuated. He means infuriated.
Oliver: Not infactuated. He means infuriated.
Movie: The Live Ghost
Stanley: We heard the sea is infactuated with sharks.
Oliver: Not infactuated. He means infuriated.
Oliver: Not infactuated. He means infuriated.
Movie: The Live Ghost
[over dead body]
Stanley: Do you think he's in heaven?
Oliver: No. Most likely he's gone to the other place. Get some coal. We'll dump him overboard.
Stanley: Do you gotta take your own coal with you when you go to the other place?
Oliver: Certainly not. It's to weight the sack down so it'll sink.
Stanley: Do you think he's in heaven?
Oliver: No. Most likely he's gone to the other place. Get some coal. We'll dump him overboard.
Stanley: Do you gotta take your own coal with you when you go to the other place?
Oliver: Certainly not. It's to weight the sack down so it'll sink.
Movie: The Live Ghost
[over "dead" body]
Stanley: Do you think he's in heaven?
Oliver: No. Most likely he's gone to the other place. Get some coal. We'll dump him overboard.
Stanley: Do you gotta take your own coal with you when you go to the other place?
Oliver: Certainly not. It's to weight the sack down so it'll sink.
Stanley: Do you think he's in heaven?
Oliver: No. Most likely he's gone to the other place. Get some coal. We'll dump him overboard.
Stanley: Do you gotta take your own coal with you when you go to the other place?
Oliver: Certainly not. It's to weight the sack down so it'll sink.
Movie: The Live Ghost
[over "dead" body]
Stanley: Do you think he's in heaven?
Oliver: No. Most likely he's gone to the other place. Get some coal. We'll dump him overboard.
Stanley: Do you gotta take your own coal with you when you go to the other place?
Oliver: Certainly not. It's to weight the sack down so it'll sink.
Stanley: Do you think he's in heaven?
Oliver: No. Most likely he's gone to the other place. Get some coal. We'll dump him overboard.
Stanley: Do you gotta take your own coal with you when you go to the other place?
Oliver: Certainly not. It's to weight the sack down so it'll sink.
Movie: The Live Ghost