The Wolf of Wall Street Quotes
Jordan Belfort: Her pussy was like heroin to me. And it wasn't just about the sex either. Naomi and I got along. I mean, we had similar interests and shit.
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Donnie Azoff: On new issue day? On cocksucking motherfucking new issue day? This is what you do!
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Mark Hanna: Mr. Hanna, you're able to do drugs during the day and then still function, still do your job?
Mark Hanna: How the fuck else are you supposed to do this job? Cocaine and hookers, my friend.
Mark Hanna: How the fuck else are you supposed to do this job? Cocaine and hookers, my friend.
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Jordan Belfort: But before you depart this room full of winners, I want you to take a good look at the person next to you. Go on. Because sometime in the not-so-distant future, you're gonna be pulling up at a red light, in your beat-up old fucking Pinto, and that person's gonna be pulling up right alongside you in their brand new Porsche. With their beautiful wife by their side, who's got big voluptuous tits. And who're you gonna be sitting next to? Some disgusting wildebeest with three days of razor-stubble, in a sleeveless muumuu, crammed in next to you in a carload full of groceries from the fucking Price Club. That's who you're gonna be sitting next to!
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Jordan Belfort: Babe, I spoke to the lawyers again today. I have some really, really great news. Turns out you're completely off the hook, honey.
Naomi Lapaglia: I know that already.
Jordan Belfort: Right! Exactly. In fact, you never did anything wrong in the first place. Turns out all the FBI really wants from me is to cooperate. You know? Turns out I have so much information about the stock market and Wall Street I can save the government years of heartache. Not to mention countless dollars.
Naomi Lapaglia: Mhmm.
Jordan Belfort: But it gets even better, baby. Because if I do decide to cooperate I might only looking at four short years. In which case, you know, we could start fresh. Maybe sell the house. And any fines that I have to pay wouldn't be due until after I've served my term, so we'd still have plenty of money leftover.
Naomi Lapaglia: Mhmm.
Jordan Belfort: The only thing that of course bummed me out a little bit about this whole idea is having to give information about my friends.
Naomi Lapaglia: Well, like you said there's no friends on Wall Street. Right?
Jordan Belfort: Right! Right, exactly. So there's a silver lining to that too, honey. Because they said eventually everyone's going to have to give information on this case so at the end of the day it might not even be a factor.
Naomi Lapaglia: Well that's good news. right?
Jordan Belfort: Yeah! Yeah.
Naomi Lapaglia: I'm really happy for you.
Jordan Belfort: What do you mean happy for me? Sweetheart, you should be happy for the both of us. Right?
Naomi Lapaglia: Yeah. Right.
Naomi Lapaglia: I know that already.
Jordan Belfort: Right! Exactly. In fact, you never did anything wrong in the first place. Turns out all the FBI really wants from me is to cooperate. You know? Turns out I have so much information about the stock market and Wall Street I can save the government years of heartache. Not to mention countless dollars.
Naomi Lapaglia: Mhmm.
Jordan Belfort: But it gets even better, baby. Because if I do decide to cooperate I might only looking at four short years. In which case, you know, we could start fresh. Maybe sell the house. And any fines that I have to pay wouldn't be due until after I've served my term, so we'd still have plenty of money leftover.
Naomi Lapaglia: Mhmm.
Jordan Belfort: The only thing that of course bummed me out a little bit about this whole idea is having to give information about my friends.
Naomi Lapaglia: Well, like you said there's no friends on Wall Street. Right?
Jordan Belfort: Right! Right, exactly. So there's a silver lining to that too, honey. Because they said eventually everyone's going to have to give information on this case so at the end of the day it might not even be a factor.
Naomi Lapaglia: Well that's good news. right?
Jordan Belfort: Yeah! Yeah.
Naomi Lapaglia: I'm really happy for you.
Jordan Belfort: What do you mean happy for me? Sweetheart, you should be happy for the both of us. Right?
Naomi Lapaglia: Yeah. Right.
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Jordan Belfort: [in narration]So I was sellin' them shit, but the wayI looked at it, the money was better off in my pocket.
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Jordan Belfort: FYI boys, Danielle has promised to use this $10,000 for breast implants. She's already got C-cups, but now she wants FUCKIN' DOUBLE D'S!
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Jordan Belfort: Donnie and I were going out on our own. And the first thing we needed was brokers. Guys with sales experience. So I recruited some of my hometown boys: Sea Otter, who sold meat and weed; Chester, who sold tires and weed; and Robbie, who sold anything he could get his hands on, mostly weed.
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Mark Hanna: Second key to success in this racket is this little baby right here. It's called *cocaine.* It'll keep you sharp between the ears. It'll also help your fingers dial faster. And guess what? That's good for me.
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Jordan Belfort: So you listen to me and you listen well. Are you behind on your credit card bills? Good! Pick up the phone and start dialing! Is your landlord ready to evict you? Good! Pick up the phone and start dialing! Does your girlfriend think you're a fucking worthless loser? Good! Pick up the phone and start dialing! I want you to deal with your problems by becoming rich! All you have to do today is pick up that phone and speak the words that I have taught you. And I will make you richer than the most powerful CEO in the United States of fucking America!
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Jordan Belfort: You be ferocious! You be relentless! You be telephone fucking terrorists! Now let's knock this motherfucker out of the park!
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Naomi Lapaglia: So I was a little surprised you asked Christie for my number.
Jordan Belfort: Yeah? Why's that?
Naomi Lapaglia: Aren't you married?
Jordan Belfort: What? Married people can't have friends?
Naomi Lapaglia: We're gonna be friends?
Jordan Belfort: Yeah. Don't you wanna be my friend?
Naomi Lapaglia: We're not gonna be friends.
Jordan Belfort: Yeah? Why's that?
Naomi Lapaglia: Aren't you married?
Jordan Belfort: What? Married people can't have friends?
Naomi Lapaglia: We're gonna be friends?
Jordan Belfort: Yeah. Don't you wanna be my friend?
Naomi Lapaglia: We're not gonna be friends.
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Captain Ted Beecham: Hold on!
Jordan Belfort: What the fuck is going on out here?
Captain Ted Beecham: The jet skis just went overboard!
Jordan Belfort: Oh, Jesus Christ. Honey, you okay?
Captain Ted Beecham: The waves are 20 feet high and building!
Jordan Belfort: Turn around! Let's go the other fucking way!
Captain Ted Beecham: We can't! We'll get broad-sided and tip over.
Jordan Belfort: I am a master diver, you hear that? A master diver! No one's gonna fucking die! I got you, baby. I got you. Trust me, okay? I love you. [kisses Naomi]
Jordan Belfort: I love you, baby. Just hold on tight.
Naomi Lapaglia: Okay!
Jordan Belfort: What the fuck is going on out here?
Captain Ted Beecham: The jet skis just went overboard!
Jordan Belfort: Oh, Jesus Christ. Honey, you okay?
Captain Ted Beecham: The waves are 20 feet high and building!
Jordan Belfort: Turn around! Let's go the other fucking way!
Captain Ted Beecham: We can't! We'll get broad-sided and tip over.
Jordan Belfort: I am a master diver, you hear that? A master diver! No one's gonna fucking die! I got you, baby. I got you. Trust me, okay? I love you. [kisses Naomi]
Jordan Belfort: I love you, baby. Just hold on tight.
Naomi Lapaglia: Okay!
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Jordan Belfort: I'm not talking about Buddhists or Amish, I'm talking about normal people - working class, everyday people. Everyone wants to get rich, am I crazy?
Chester Ming: There's no such thing as an Amish Buddhist, I'm pretty fucking sure.
Chester Ming: There's no such thing as an Amish Buddhist, I'm pretty fucking sure.
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Jordan Belfort: I felt horrible. Three days later, I filed for a divorce and moved Naomi into the apartment.
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Jordan Belfort: I'm not ashamed to admit it. When we arrived to prison, I was absolutely terrified. But I needn't have been. See, for a brief fleeting moment, I'd forgotten I was rich and I lived in a place where everything was for sale. Wouldn't you like to learn how to sell it?
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Mark Hanna: We don't give two shits about how technology works, 'cause all we care about is getting fucking RICH!
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street
Jordan Belfort: And in the case of the telephone, it's up to each and every one of you, my highly-trained Strattonites. My killers, my killers who will not take no for an answer. My fucking warriors, who will not hang up the phone until their client either buys *or fucking dies!*
Movie: The Wolf of Wall Street