Whose Line Is It Anyway? Quotes
George McGrath
Woo!
I like to put on real tight clothes and then go underwater
But every time I get there, I wonder if I oughta
'Cos then I see lots of things, they're swimmy-swimmin' fish
And then they make me talk (gurgling) like this!
Hey!
Woo!
I like to put on real tight clothes and then go underwater
But every time I get there, I wonder if I oughta
'Cos then I see lots of things, they're swimmy-swimmin' fish
And then they make me talk (gurgling) like this!
Hey!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Ryan Stiles
I love all the fishies, all the sharkies too
When I see one come towards me, I swim like you
Out of all the friends down there, hey don't you know
There's a friend of mine, the popular Jacques Cousteau!
I love all the fishies, all the sharkies too
When I see one come towards me, I swim like you
Out of all the friends down there, hey don't you know
There's a friend of mine, the popular Jacques Cousteau!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Mike McShane
Okay, have some fruity George Balanchine cowboy dancing! (Mike, Greg, George and Ryan dance around the stage)
Ah, I'm a scuba diving boy
I dive for pearls and pick 'em up like toys
And when I'm deep and I really got no cares
Until I'm turning blue 'cos I ain't got no air... (gasps)
Okay, have some fruity George Balanchine cowboy dancing! (Mike, Greg, George and Ryan dance around the stage)
Ah, I'm a scuba diving boy
I dive for pearls and pick 'em up like toys
And when I'm deep and I really got no cares
Until I'm turning blue 'cos I ain't got no air... (gasps)
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
All
He's got no air, he's got no air
He's got no air, he's got no air (Mike: Got no air!)
He ain't got no air!
He's got no air, he's got no air
He's got no air, he's got no air (Mike: Got no air!)
He ain't got no air!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Ron West:
I put on my skis and I look like a dope
I'm goin' down the hill which is also called a slope
I feel really good when I'm doing the giant slalom
I can't ever do it right, but that's why my name's Nalom!
I put on my skis and I look like a dope
I'm goin' down the hill which is also called a slope
I feel really good when I'm doing the giant slalom
I can't ever do it right, but that's why my name's Nalom!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Ryan Stiles:
Drinking coffee and skiing can be a lot of fun
When you're heading down that long ski-run
It can be really fun, don'tcha don'tcha know?
But the best part is writing with pee-pee in the snow!
Drinking coffee and skiing can be a lot of fun
When you're heading down that long ski-run
It can be really fun, don'tcha don'tcha know?
But the best part is writing with pee-pee in the snow!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Colin Mochrie:
My girlfriend once she started to ski with a branch
But then she was swallowed up by an avalanche
It really is quite ugly, it really is sublime
But when I see slopes you know I'll pine!
My girlfriend once she started to ski with a branch
But then she was swallowed up by an avalanche
It really is quite ugly, it really is sublime
But when I see slopes you know I'll pine!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Greg Proops:
Oh I'm a little yuppie, you know I like to ski
I take my beamer to the slopes, just me and my wife and mistress and me
And when I get to skiing, you know it's just a dodge
What I really like to do is pick up chicks in the lodge!
Oh I'm a little yuppie, you know I like to ski
I take my beamer to the slopes, just me and my wife and mistress and me
And when I get to skiing, you know it's just a dodge
What I really like to do is pick up chicks in the lodge!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Sam Johnson:
Yee-haw! Woo-hoo woo yee!
When I first did meet you, I wanted to give you a whirl
Too bad that you were not a girl
Now that all has changed, I thank my lucky star
That you went to Denmark. Yee-haw!
Yee-haw! Woo-hoo woo yee!
When I first did meet you, I wanted to give you a whirl
Too bad that you were not a girl
Now that all has changed, I thank my lucky star
That you went to Denmark. Yee-haw!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Jane Brucker:
I tell you one thing, I think it's kinda hip
Now that I'm a guy, I never wax my lip
Ever since I just took my brand new testosterone
I've discovered that I've got myself a brand new bone!
I tell you one thing, I think it's kinda hip
Now that I'm a guy, I never wax my lip
Ever since I just took my brand new testosterone
I've discovered that I've got myself a brand new bone!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Ryan Stiles:
My friends no longer know me, they think that things have changed
All my parts have been rearranged
They don't know me any longer as Billy
Since they cut... off my willy.
My friends no longer know me, they think that things have changed
All my parts have been rearranged
They don't know me any longer as Billy
Since they cut... off my willy.
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Chip Esten:
I have a little boy, you know his name is Tom
I was his daddy, but now I am his mom
I was a tough one, as tough as ol' Charles Bronson
Until I went to the hospital and they cut off my Johnson!
I have a little boy, you know his name is Tom
I was his daddy, but now I am his mom
I was a tough one, as tough as ol' Charles Bronson
Until I went to the hospital and they cut off my Johnson!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Greg Proops:
(mimes playing a Jews harp)
I love to ride my Harley, I ride it day and night
I drive all through the neighbourhood to give the kids a fright
It may seem kinda stupid, it may seem kinda fun
But they always freak out when I dress up like a nun!
(mimes playing a Jews harp)
I love to ride my Harley, I ride it day and night
I drive all through the neighbourhood to give the kids a fright
It may seem kinda stupid, it may seem kinda fun
But they always freak out when I dress up like a nun!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Ron West:
I like to ride my Harley, I like to ride it fast
I get my bitch on the back of me and I slap her ass
Sometimes we go fast, we hit our jaws
I don't give a good damn about the helmet laws!
I like to ride my Harley, I like to ride it fast
I get my bitch on the back of me and I slap her ass
Sometimes we go fast, we hit our jaws
I don't give a good damn about the helmet laws!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Ryan Stiles:
I like to ride my bike now, I think it's really slick
And it's the best way to pick up a chick
She gets on and waves and says her bye-byes
There's nothing like hot metal between her thighs!
I like to ride my bike now, I think it's really slick
And it's the best way to pick up a chick
She gets on and waves and says her bye-byes
There's nothing like hot metal between her thighs!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Brad Sherwood:
Well Harley-Davidsons an awesome machine
Driving Kawasakis is for just a two-bit queen
I love to go riding round so manly in the dirt
And sometimes on the weekends I wear panties and a skirt!
Well Harley-Davidsons an awesome machine
Driving Kawasakis is for just a two-bit queen
I love to go riding round so manly in the dirt
And sometimes on the weekends I wear panties and a skirt!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Greg Proops:
I used to masturbate alot, I stopped it if you please
I found another hobbie, I call it making cheese
I use a tiny goat, sometimes it will curdle
When I went to get skimmed milk, I put the goat in a girdle
I used to masturbate alot, I stopped it if you please
I found another hobbie, I call it making cheese
I use a tiny goat, sometimes it will curdle
When I went to get skimmed milk, I put the goat in a girdle
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Colin Mochrie:
I run a little cheese shop, I sell all kinds of cheese
Just come in with money, and I'll take it if you please
I sell from all kinds of nations, from here and there
From here and there and there and here, I used to masturbate
I run a little cheese shop, I sell all kinds of cheese
Just come in with money, and I'll take it if you please
I sell from all kinds of nations, from here and there
From here and there and there and here, I used to masturbate
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Ryan Stiles:
I like to eat my cheese with my best friend
eat and eat and eat it, until the very end
I like to eat with my friend, don't you know is Sam
After I am done with cheese, I like to e-dam
I like to eat my cheese with my best friend
eat and eat and eat it, until the very end
I like to eat with my friend, don't you know is Sam
After I am done with cheese, I like to e-dam
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Brad Sherwood:
I got a billion cheeses, all around my house
I like to entice my lover, which is a brownfield mouse
She is so darn happy, as she is in love with me
When we make love, we make in love in lots of warm, runny brie
I got a billion cheeses, all around my house
I like to entice my lover, which is a brownfield mouse
She is so darn happy, as she is in love with me
When we make love, we make in love in lots of warm, runny brie
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Greg Proops:
Oh I went to college, I wasn't very smart
I throw my hands up, giving up, at the very start
Every test I take you know, I test it without fail
But it doesn't matter 'cos I am Dan Quayle!
Oh I went to college, I wasn't very smart
I throw my hands up, giving up, at the very start
Every test I take you know, I test it without fail
But it doesn't matter 'cos I am Dan Quayle!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Colin Mochrie:
I had to take an exam, I studied very hard
I thought up very very hard and put things on a card
I studied, studied, tried, tried and... tried all my best
And then I went and realised it was a urine test!
I had to take an exam, I studied very hard
I thought up very very hard and put things on a card
I studied, studied, tried, tried and... tried all my best
And then I went and realised it was a urine test!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Ryan Stiles:
Oh I love exams, they are so much fun
I love to take the paper and sit down on my bum
Oh I am very smart, oh it might sound kinda silly
But I pass every test 'cos I write notes right there on my willy!
Oh I love exams, they are so much fun
I love to take the paper and sit down on my bum
Oh I am very smart, oh it might sound kinda silly
But I pass every test 'cos I write notes right there on my willy!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Tony Slattery:
I hate examinations, it fills me with such fear
I get the collywobbles and lots of diarrhoea
So if you are a student, don't care about the pain
Get through your exams by taking lots of cocaine!
I hate examinations, it fills me with such fear
I get the collywobbles and lots of diarrhoea
So if you are a student, don't care about the pain
Get through your exams by taking lots of cocaine!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Greg Proops:
Oh I hate going for haircuts, it really is a drag
'Cos I think my barber is a mighty hag!
Every time I sit in the chair I always say "Damn my luck"
Because he always cuts my ear and then I yell out "darn".
Oh I hate going for haircuts, it really is a drag
'Cos I think my barber is a mighty hag!
Every time I sit in the chair I always say "Damn my luck"
Because he always cuts my ear and then I yell out "darn".
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Russell Fletcher:
To get a haircut I need to save up a few bob
To get a nice knit-one so I can get that new job
But when I went in I came out a bit queerer
I hadn't been to the hairdresser, I'd been to the sheep shearer!
To get a haircut I need to save up a few bob
To get a nice knit-one so I can get that new job
But when I went in I came out a bit queerer
I hadn't been to the hairdresser, I'd been to the sheep shearer!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Ryan Stiles:
Oh I'm not sure of my barber, I think he's kinda strange
The way he likes to play at my hair he'd always rearrange
I'm not sure about him, I don't think he's my kind of guy
But I can't complain when he likes to blow me dry!
Oh I'm not sure of my barber, I think he's kinda strange
The way he likes to play at my hair he'd always rearrange
I'm not sure about him, I don't think he's my kind of guy
But I can't complain when he likes to blow me dry!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Josie Lawrence:
Well I hate hairdressers and all the things they say
They push my neck over the sink and say "Have you been on 'oliday?"
Yes I hate hairdressers, I ain't been to one since
I asked them for a blow-dry and they gave me a blue rinse!
Well I hate hairdressers and all the things they say
They push my neck over the sink and say "Have you been on 'oliday?"
Yes I hate hairdressers, I ain't been to one since
I asked them for a blow-dry and they gave me a blue rinse!
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Greg Proops:
When I came to England, I met me a man
He was shiny and bald, his name was Clive Ander-san
There was some confusion, "I said where's the freeway?"
He said "No you silly twat, it's called a motorway"
When I came to England, I met me a man
He was shiny and bald, his name was Clive Ander-san
There was some confusion, "I said where's the freeway?"
He said "No you silly twat, it's called a motorway"
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Colin Mochrie:
I use the motorway, each and every day
It's really turned alot like work, it really is not play
I got hit badly, and why do you suppose?
I got rear-ended by a guy picking his nose
I use the motorway, each and every day
It's really turned alot like work, it really is not play
I got hit badly, and why do you suppose?
I got rear-ended by a guy picking his nose
TV Show: Whose Line Is It Anyway?