Wizards of Waverly Place Quotes
Justin: Future wizard?! [takes the magazine] What?
Max: Oh, that's me.
Justin: [looks at Max then grunts angrily] You didn't even win the competition! That's it! I'm doing whatever it takes to get back into this thing. But first, I'm going to draw a silly mustache and maybe a uni brow to express my discontent. [goes into the storage room]
Max: Oh, that's me.
Justin: [looks at Max then grunts angrily] You didn't even win the competition! That's it! I'm doing whatever it takes to get back into this thing. But first, I'm going to draw a silly mustache and maybe a uni brow to express my discontent. [goes into the storage room]
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Mason: Oh, now I get it. I just thought Alex was being uncharacteristically generous.
Alex and Harper: [laughing]
Alex and Harper: [laughing]
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Alex: Hey everyone! Who wants to play a game called "Embarrass Your Boyfriend"! I'll go first! Did you know that Mason told me he sleeps in a nightgown and cap like Ebeneezer Scrooge? (all but Mason laugh)
Mason: What are you doing? I asked you to never tell anyone that!
Alex: I'm sorry Mason. Are you getting upset? Oh! here's another one! Did you know that Mason can only ride in a car when his head is sticking out the window and his tongue is flapping in the wind?! (all but Mason laugh)
Mason: Alex, stop! You're making me mad!
Alex: Oh, and here's the best one! Mason cries if you even SAY "Old Yeller" (turns to Mason quickly) OLD YELLER!
Mason: (turns his back to others, crying) STOP IT!
Mason: What are you doing? I asked you to never tell anyone that!
Alex: I'm sorry Mason. Are you getting upset? Oh! here's another one! Did you know that Mason can only ride in a car when his head is sticking out the window and his tongue is flapping in the wind?! (all but Mason laugh)
Mason: Alex, stop! You're making me mad!
Alex: Oh, and here's the best one! Mason cries if you even SAY "Old Yeller" (turns to Mason quickly) OLD YELLER!
Mason: (turns his back to others, crying) STOP IT!
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Mr. Laritate: Pull over there. I have to get something healthy to eat to calm my nerves.
Alex: That's a donut shop.
Mr. Laritate: I'll get the ones with the fruit in the middle!
Alex: That's a donut shop.
Mr. Laritate: I'll get the ones with the fruit in the middle!
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Alex: You see this is what I get for helping you out while you where driving.
Harper: I didn't ask for your help.
Alex: I was helping me. I wanted to live.
Harper: I don't need your help. I'm going to pass the drivers test all by myself.
Alex: Well I don't need you either. I can clean all the garbage cans by myself, and what am I going to need to do that? Do I need like a rag or a, or a brush or spray? No? FINE!
Harper: I didn't ask for your help.
Alex: I was helping me. I wanted to live.
Harper: I don't need your help. I'm going to pass the drivers test all by myself.
Alex: Well I don't need you either. I can clean all the garbage cans by myself, and what am I going to need to do that? Do I need like a rag or a, or a brush or spray? No? FINE!
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Jerry: Hey Justin. It looks like you are going to win the wizard competition, so I am going to pass the family robe down to you now.
Justin: Ah, what an honor.
Jerry: Its good.
Alex: I have finished my oil painting.
Harper: Coconut cream pies are done.
Max: this is a box of mud.
Justin: Ah, what an honor.
Jerry: Its good.
Alex: I have finished my oil painting.
Harper: Coconut cream pies are done.
Max: this is a box of mud.
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Max Look! Now she's all over him. That's Dean Moriarty.
Mason I'm sure she's just brushing some filthy dandruff off his shoulder. He doesn't look clean.
Max Dude, you rolled around in a dead squirrel the other day.
Mason I'm sure she's just brushing some filthy dandruff off his shoulder. He doesn't look clean.
Max Dude, you rolled around in a dead squirrel the other day.
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Justin: Let's learn the Up and Atom spell.
Tyler: Or we could learn the Kick Back and Chill spell instead. It goes like this. Abra- [puts foot up on table] Cadabra! (puts other foot up and table and puts hands behind head).
Tyler: Or we could learn the Kick Back and Chill spell instead. It goes like this. Abra- [puts foot up on table] Cadabra! (puts other foot up and table and puts hands behind head).
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Alex: Mason! (sees a trail of rose petals on the floor) Rose petals? What did you do? We're suppose to stay friends.
Mason: Those aren't from me, but I have my suspicions.
Dean: (outside) Hey yo Russo! Like my flowers?
Mason: Suspicions confirmed.
Mason: Those aren't from me, but I have my suspicions.
Dean: (outside) Hey yo Russo! Like my flowers?
Mason: Suspicions confirmed.
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Mason: (burps then smiles nervously) I ate Dean.
Alex and Harper: (shocked)
Max: (gives Mason a thumbs up)
Alex: Mason! You can't just go around eating people! This isn't-this isn't-(turns to Harper) What place are we trying to think of Harper?
Harper: No place! There's no place where you can just go around eating people!
Mason: I'm sorry.
Alex: You're sorry?! How could you do this?!
Mason: Well it was easy because his hair was greasy and then he kinda got stuck at the shoulders.
Max: Yeah so then this guy started choking so then I just shrunk Dean down and made him easier to eat. : (pats Mason's back)
Alex: (looks at Harper)
Mason: Alex, I'm sorry. I saw how well you were getting along with Dean and I guess I got a little jealous.
Alex: THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN EAT HIM!
Alex and Harper: (shocked)
Max: (gives Mason a thumbs up)
Alex: Mason! You can't just go around eating people! This isn't-this isn't-(turns to Harper) What place are we trying to think of Harper?
Harper: No place! There's no place where you can just go around eating people!
Mason: I'm sorry.
Alex: You're sorry?! How could you do this?!
Mason: Well it was easy because his hair was greasy and then he kinda got stuck at the shoulders.
Max: Yeah so then this guy started choking so then I just shrunk Dean down and made him easier to eat. : (pats Mason's back)
Alex: (looks at Harper)
Mason: Alex, I'm sorry. I saw how well you were getting along with Dean and I guess I got a little jealous.
Alex: THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN EAT HIM!
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
In the lair:
(Alex, Harper, Max and Mason run inside the lair to get Justin.)
Alex: Justin! Justin! We need your help! Mason ate Dean.
Justin: Not now Alex. I'm trying to through to my class. HE ATE DEAN?!
Felix: The hairy guy ate somebody?
Max: Yeah, he's a werewolf.
Tyler: Nice!
Alex: Justin please! We have to find a way to get Dean out of Mason.
Felix: Let's cut him open!
Mason: Let's not cut him open! He's a very nice guy.
Harper: Nice guy? You ate somebody!
Tyler: Dudes, let's all shrink down with the Up and Atom spell, go inside him, and then bounce around his stomach until he barfs up Dean!
Class: [disgusted]
Alex: Okay, next!
Justin: No, no, no, no. Tyler might be onto something here.
Tyler: Sweet!
(Alex, Harper, Max and Mason run inside the lair to get Justin.)
Alex: Justin! Justin! We need your help! Mason ate Dean.
Justin: Not now Alex. I'm trying to through to my class. HE ATE DEAN?!
Felix: The hairy guy ate somebody?
Max: Yeah, he's a werewolf.
Tyler: Nice!
Alex: Justin please! We have to find a way to get Dean out of Mason.
Felix: Let's cut him open!
Mason: Let's not cut him open! He's a very nice guy.
Harper: Nice guy? You ate somebody!
Tyler: Dudes, let's all shrink down with the Up and Atom spell, go inside him, and then bounce around his stomach until he barfs up Dean!
Class: [disgusted]
Alex: Okay, next!
Justin: No, no, no, no. Tyler might be onto something here.
Tyler: Sweet!
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Justin: Okay, we're gonna need some kind of fully functional miniature submarine.
Alex: I know where we can get one. (waves wand and a small cow-patterned box appears on table)
Justin: No. Not my Captain Jim Bob Sherwood fully functional Country Cow submarine! If I open it it will be worth nothing!
Alex: Justin.
Justin: No.
Alex: Going inside Mason's body would be the greatest adventure anyone could ever have. Jim Bob would jump at the chance.
Justin: You...are right. (grabs box) This is a Captain Jim Bob job. (opens box reluctantly) Ah! It smells new.
Alex: I know where we can get one. (waves wand and a small cow-patterned box appears on table)
Justin: No. Not my Captain Jim Bob Sherwood fully functional Country Cow submarine! If I open it it will be worth nothing!
Alex: Justin.
Justin: No.
Alex: Going inside Mason's body would be the greatest adventure anyone could ever have. Jim Bob would jump at the chance.
Justin: You...are right. (grabs box) This is a Captain Jim Bob job. (opens box reluctantly) Ah! It smells new.
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Alex: I still don't understand why a submarine crew has to dress up like cows.
Max: Cows? I thought we were dalmatians. Now it's just weird.
Justin: Country cow submarine? What a crew. (shows Harper to the Abracadoodler) Okay, I've turned the Abracadoodler into a submarine tracking sonar scope.
Harper: (sits down) Oh perfect. I can't wait to not know what to use this for.
Max: Cows? I thought we were dalmatians. Now it's just weird.
Justin: Country cow submarine? What a crew. (shows Harper to the Abracadoodler) Okay, I've turned the Abracadoodler into a submarine tracking sonar scope.
Harper: (sits down) Oh perfect. I can't wait to not know what to use this for.
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Justin: Mason. You are going to swallow us. You are going to swallow us, not chew us.
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Alex: I'm going to get back into the wizard competition and I'm going to win...for us.
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
(In Sub Station; Dean is coming to)
Dean: What happened? What are you guys wearing? And WHAT AM I COVERED IN?!
Justin: Alex you got this one right? (walks away)
Harper: She lives for these moments! (follows Justin)
Max: Simon says follow them! (follows Harper)
Alex: Um, okay, well, you see, Dean you got knocked out by a flying bowl of oatmeal. And we called the doctor, and he said the only way to wake you up was to dress up like cows.
Mason: (to Alex) Really? That's your story?
Alex: (whispers) Give it a minute!
Dean: That's a good doctor.
Dean: What happened? What are you guys wearing? And WHAT AM I COVERED IN?!
Justin: Alex you got this one right? (walks away)
Harper: She lives for these moments! (follows Justin)
Max: Simon says follow them! (follows Harper)
Alex: Um, okay, well, you see, Dean you got knocked out by a flying bowl of oatmeal. And we called the doctor, and he said the only way to wake you up was to dress up like cows.
Mason: (to Alex) Really? That's your story?
Alex: (whispers) Give it a minute!
Dean: That's a good doctor.
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
(Jerry and Theresa playing Skee Ball. Alex and Mason come out of the Sub Station.)
Alex: Mom, dad, I have some really exciting news. I've decided to get back in the Wizard Competition.
Theresa: (distracted by Skee Ball) It's in the drawer with the dead batteries. A hundred, Jerry!
Alex: Are you even listening? I am going to win the Wizards Competition so Mason and I can be together.
Jerry: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Great, honey. (reaches into pocket) Here's twenty dollars. (hands to Alex) Take your own candy. (rolls ball) Ah haha! A hundred and fifty points, Theresa!
Mason: Let me try. I ate Dean today.
Jerry and Theresa: (stop playing) What?!
Alex: He said we're going to the movies. Bye! (the episode ends as Alex and Mason run down the street)
Alex: Mom, dad, I have some really exciting news. I've decided to get back in the Wizard Competition.
Theresa: (distracted by Skee Ball) It's in the drawer with the dead batteries. A hundred, Jerry!
Alex: Are you even listening? I am going to win the Wizards Competition so Mason and I can be together.
Jerry: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Great, honey. (reaches into pocket) Here's twenty dollars. (hands to Alex) Take your own candy. (rolls ball) Ah haha! A hundred and fifty points, Theresa!
Mason: Let me try. I ate Dean today.
Jerry and Theresa: (stop playing) What?!
Alex: He said we're going to the movies. Bye! (the episode ends as Alex and Mason run down the street)
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Alex: Justin, please tell me-oooh, cotton candy! (takes a piece of the swirl)
Jerry: Max was in it.
Alex: [drops the cotton candy]
Jerry: Max was in it.
Alex: [drops the cotton candy]
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Alex: Yes you did. [in a baby voice] You're the best brother ever.
Justin: Get out!
Alex: [skips happily to the portal door]
Justin: Get out!
Alex: [skips happily to the portal door]
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Justin: The key to mastering a spell is focusing your inner wizard and summoning all your power. It's a little something I like to call "Using the Force".
Felix: The Force? Dude, you ripped that off of Star Wars!
Justin: Or did they rip it off from me...? [tries to use the Jedi mind trick on Felix]
Felix: And you ripped that off, too!
Felix: The Force? Dude, you ripped that off of Star Wars!
Justin: Or did they rip it off from me...? [tries to use the Jedi mind trick on Felix]
Felix: And you ripped that off, too!
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Justin: Alex, why are you wasting my time? You were suppose to transform into Justin Bieber not "Just a beaver."
Alex: [as a beaver] What went wrong? I did the spell correctly!
Alex: [as a beaver] What went wrong? I did the spell correctly!
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Max: [enters the lair from the portal] Hey guys. So I moved up the wizard competition to Monday at 4pm. Let's just get this thing done. [leaves]
Justin and Alex: WHAT?!
Alex: I can't believe that Max moved up the final wizard competition! Is that even legal?
Justin: [reading a book] Yeah the Wizard Competition Code states it. Only Max can change the date back. Okay, don't worry about it. I'll...go talk to him. I can reason with him.
Alex: Say that last sentence again.
Justin: I can reason with him. [realizes what he said] I will...distract him with something shiny.
Justin and Alex: WHAT?!
Alex: I can't believe that Max moved up the final wizard competition! Is that even legal?
Justin: [reading a book] Yeah the Wizard Competition Code states it. Only Max can change the date back. Okay, don't worry about it. I'll...go talk to him. I can reason with him.
Alex: Say that last sentence again.
Justin: I can reason with him. [realizes what he said] I will...distract him with something shiny.
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Harper: [to Alex] Alex, I think you're being replaced as daddy's little girl.
Alex: [mildly annoyed] Please, I'm daddy's little girl. [referring to 'Max/Maxine'] That is daddy's little freak.
Alex: [mildly annoyed] Please, I'm daddy's little girl. [referring to 'Max/Maxine'] That is daddy's little freak.
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Justin: Hmm. Looks like the little girl shoe is on the other foot, and it fits well. [leaves]
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Maxine: [gazing at her reflection backstage, at the dojo]PIGTAILS?LOLLIPOP?!?You didn't change me back,you made me CUTER! Get ready,because Maxine is going to be your cutest nightmare. EVER.
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place
Alex: It doesn't even look that hard. It's just a little pamphlet. [opens the pamphlet to reveal more] Little bit. [opens pamphlet more and stretches it out to Justin] More. [opens the paper more] Oh, this is going to take me, like, three days to close up!
TV Show: Wizards of Waverly Place